Online Dating/personals

Lounge By Sunflower08 Updated 28 Apr 2008 , 3:37pm by Sunflower08

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Sunflower08 Posted 21 Apr 2008 , 1:11am
post #1 of 34

Has anyone used online dating/personals sites?? Any have any luck with them?

33 replies
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VannaD Posted 21 Apr 2008 , 4:15pm
post #2 of 34

My SIL and BIl met on yahoo personals, they've been married almost 3 yrs and dated a year before that. My brothers sister also met a guy on MYSPACE, theyve been together about ayear and are getting married on 6/7/8. Ive never used anything like that so I dont know how it works but my advice is just be careful, you never know what kind of crazies are hiding behind ther computer

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ncdessertdiva Posted 21 Apr 2008 , 6:28pm
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I met my husband online 10 years ago and we're still together. My girlfriend also met her husband online. My advice would be to talk to them via email or IM, if you decide to meet them, drive yourself and meet in a public place. I met several men that way and always felt safe.
Good luck!
Leslie

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Sunflower08 Posted 22 Apr 2008 , 7:09pm
post #4 of 34

Thank you for responding...!!!

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Auryn Posted 22 Apr 2008 , 8:45pm
post #5 of 34

I met my current boyfriend online 3 years ago.
We were friends first and I gotta tell you, hes definitely my other half.
We never would have met if not for online dating.

If you want some safety tips let us know, thats really the key here.

You have to look at online dating like a numbers game, your gonna have to talk to a lot of frogs to find your prince charming.

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awolf24 Posted 22 Apr 2008 , 8:55pm
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I haven't tried it myself...but one of my best friends got married last Nov. to someone she met online (and they found out they worked for the same company - how coincidental is that???). My sister also met her current boyfriend and she moved out of state to be closer to him. They now live together and plan to get engaged/married so I know it does work out. icon_smile.gif Just be careful and cautious if you decide to meet someone (meet in public, drive separately, etc.) and it could work out for you too!

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PattyLen Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 2:14am
post #7 of 34

My husband and I met in a chat room 8 years ago (we've been married 6 years). Neither of us was looking. We lived 8 hours away from each other. We talked on the phone a lot. That gave us the opportunity to get to know one another. We were very candid about what was important to us and what mistakes we had made in the past. We had nothing to lose and everything to gain. There are success stories, just be careful! Good luck.
Patty Len

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 12:15pm
post #8 of 34

Do you girls have any tips ???

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TexasSugar Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:19pm
post #9 of 34

I have three rules to meeting people off line. Granted I haven't met the love of my life yet, but I have made some great friends.

1. I have to talk to you online and feel comfortable with you.

2. I have to talk to you on the phone and actually have real conversations.

3. I have to see a current picture.

There have been people I have talked to online but didn't really have alot to talk to once we talked on the phone. And there are people I have talked to on the phone but had no spark when we met in person.

And I say get a current picture because I have had people send me a picture that is 5 years old and they look very different. I recently met a guy and really wanted to ask him how old his picture was because I would not have recongnized him. Looks aren't everything, but they do play a part in things.

You will have to weed out alot of people that are just looking for sex, but that is pretty easy to do after a while. If they come out at you with how pretty/hot you are and want to meet you right away, those are usually the ones you want to avoid.

Above anything else always trust yourself. If you feel something isn't quite right or things they say don't add up, then they probably aren't. If you get a case like this start questioning things. I have caught married guys in lies. If you tell me you are divorced, but only talk to me when they are at work or late at night I'm going to wonder why. If I see red flags I always pay attention to them.

As everyone said when you meet do it in a public place, meet him there, and tell someone you are doing it. Let a close friend or family member know. Better safe than sorry.

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:23pm
post #10 of 34

Ok I have been talking to a guy for about a week and half.. Started on the computer with emails..We have sent about 100 back and forth. We started talking on the phone Saturday and we are having really good conversation. 1 to 2 hrs per conversation! Well he sent me flowers yesterday to work.. I'm not sure if I should be excited or creeped out! Don't get me wrong he's not put off any vibes that he's a creep or anything. So I don't know if I should worry or not.. Or just meet him in person and decide from there..

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TexasSugar Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:29pm
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Did you tell him where you worked? If not, then yes I'd be creeped out.

How old is he? Do you feel like it was meant as a sweet gesture or do you think he is trying to hard? What is his experince with meeting people online?

If you are unsure give it a little longer before you plan to meet him. When you are ready you will know and will feel comfortable about doing it.

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:42pm
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Yea we talked about where we both work. So that part didn't really creep me out.. He's 36. I took it as a sweet gesture.. I got a text message from him asking if I was having a good day and told him it was going alright some just some office drama going on. So he said well I hope you have a great day wait about two hours and give me a call.. at that point I thought ok he's coming up to my job.. (I work in a carryout part time) That made me freak out cause I didn't want to do that at all. But that wasn't the case. He said oh no I'm not coming up unless I'm invited. Good idea! So I get to work and there is a dozen assorted roses waiting for me with a card that says Suprise! Have a great day... If they would have been red roses I would have cut all ties right there. But no red ones at all.

He hasn't met anyone off the internet and I haven't really either..

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TexasSugar Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:49pm
post #13 of 34

Hmm, I don't know the whole story of course, but from my experince, I'd say keep him around, atleast for now.

If it had been red roses I'd been less impressed. Red roses take no thought and personally I'm a mixed assortment kind of girl, and they don't even have to be roses. Sounds like he wanted to do something to cheer you up, which is always great. Means he is thoughtful.

It is also a good sign that he won't show up at your work with out being invited to.

Has he mentioned meeting in person yet?

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 5:53pm
post #14 of 34

He has hinted around to meeting in person but he told me that's on my terms.. I guess I am just questioning everything cause I haven't had that in my life for a long time and just question why someone would do that for me..

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TexasSugar Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 6:13pm
post #15 of 34

There are good guys out there. icon_smile.gif They are hard to find, but they are out there.

It's still early and you have nothing to lose by waiting to meet him and getting to know him a little better. You will know when it is time.

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 6:21pm
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Thanks Texas Sugar! I appreciate you talking with me!! icon_smile.gif

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PattyLen Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 6:53pm
post #17 of 34

My husband and I talked on the phone for four months before finally meeting. We'd talk about meeting and then one of us would get cold feet.

I agree with TexasSugar, there's no rush, and you'll know when the time is right.

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Sunflower08 Posted 23 Apr 2008 , 6:57pm
post #18 of 34

Thank you!

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TexasSugar Posted 24 Apr 2008 , 2:53am
post #19 of 34

There is no set timetable for meeting. Everyone has different ways of doing things. I have meet people after a few weeks of talking to them, after months, and have even met some of my online friends after years of talking to them.

Good luck!

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SaraO Posted 24 Apr 2008 , 3:20am
post #20 of 34

I find it a little odd that he sent flowers to your work before you had even met in person so I would just take your time and be a little cautious. I'm not saying there's necessarily anything wrong with him, just that his behaviour seems a little unusual.

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kelleyinco Posted 24 Apr 2008 , 3:52am
post #21 of 34

I met my wonderful boyfriend on a free dating site called Plenty Of Fish! I divorced after 13 years of marriage and figured it was time to get out there and see what this dating thing was all about. I chose online because A)having met my ex at 19 I totally missed out on the dating ordeal... B) I have two kids and going to the bars didn't seem like an option... or fun and C) I could get to know men before meeting them in person.

Adam contacted me the second day I was online. I met him in person about a week later and almost two years later things are going swimmingly!

I also have tons of wedding cake clients who have met online. I think match.com seems to be the big one. I liked that the one I tried was freeicon_smile.gif

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Sunflower08 Posted 24 Apr 2008 , 12:01pm
post #22 of 34

I'm being very cautious about the whole thing! For one you never know into todays world and two the flowers already too. I mean yes it was a sweet gesture but I think a little early..

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booger Posted 25 Apr 2008 , 8:06am
post #23 of 34

sweet gesture yeah! But I guess I'm different, I don't think it was "weird" We seem to, anymore, think the romancing, or being thoughtful is right anymore. I can understand no rushing, but hey if someone wants to spoil me or get me thinking of him first before others that I may be seeing then hey go for it. It can be a good thing, but yes be careful and sure take it as slow as you need it to be! Good luck!

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flayvurdfun Posted 25 Apr 2008 , 8:43am
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my husband and I never met for 3 months, after we started "talking" instead we called each other, wrote letters and he sent flowers to me every week when we first started talking. We finally met on Mothers day that year, then only seen each other once a month (he lived in SC, I lived in DE) my son and I moved to SC 3 months after our first meeting. Then 6 months later we got married, didn't know each other a year, but things are ok. Theres a lot to be said about going slow..... fast isn't always the best!

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VannaD Posted 25 Apr 2008 , 4:04pm
post #25 of 34

i agree flowers are sweet but may have been to soon, but like everyone else says, there are nice guys out there. Im eager to see how this plays out, keep us posted, we are rooting for you!

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Sunflower08 Posted 25 Apr 2008 , 5:14pm
post #26 of 34

I will keep you all posted. We are actually going to meet for dinner tonight. We are meeting there. I have also told a friend of mine so that someone knows where I am just in case!
Will post tonight when I get home!!

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ida13c Posted 27 Apr 2008 , 5:17pm
post #27 of 34

I met my husband on a dating site here in Denmark, and we're VERY happy. met a few non-starters, too, but then that's normal, wherever you meet the person.

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Sunflower08 Posted 27 Apr 2008 , 5:23pm
post #28 of 34

Update!!

So this guy is a total no go! We met for dinner friday night and he was ten minutes late to start.. We had dinner talked for a little while and then went our ways.. After meeting in person I didn't feel anything with him what so ever so I politely told him thanks again for the flowers and dinner, and the I'm just not interested. So what does he do? He proceeds to leave me voicemails yelling at me saying I'm heartless and I'll never find anyone. Then starts sending me emails like crazy telling me how bad of a person I am. WOW! I'm so glad I didn't persue this guy.. He turned crazy on me!!
So back to the search... Thank you everyone for comments!!

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TexasSugar Posted 28 Apr 2008 , 1:23am
post #29 of 34

Aww, sounds like you found one of the a**holes out there. Unfortunetly you do have to weed through many of those to find some decent guys. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, but I'm glad you found out before things progressed any more.

See if you can block his number and email address!

Good luck with the next one. icon_smile.gif

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Sunflower08 Posted 28 Apr 2008 , 12:31pm
post #30 of 34
Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasSugar

Aww, sounds like you found one of the a**holes out there. Unfortunetly you do have to weed through many of those to find some decent guys. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, but I'm glad you found out before things progressed any more.

See if you can block his number and email address!

Good luck with the next one. icon_smile.gif


I already did all the blocking emails and everything.. The way he went off on me really freaked me out..
Thanks for you support!

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