very quick background to why this is more special than just a comment from my kid ... Alaine is my step-daughter ... she is ALWAYS introduced as MY daughter but sheis 10 and I am 24 so the only time I disclose she is not mine when ppl look at me like I was a slut back then to have a kid that old LOL .... anyway her mom abandoned her for drugs and a boyfriend about 3.5 years ago and I am herperminant mom (she calls me mom). Now her mom is back in town and trying to get visitation, she gets to talk 2 times a week and has for like 3 weeks now so it is really hard on both of us with her mother trying to ACT like a mother when she has not been one ofr so long ... anyway on with my story!
I have to say that I am one proud mom right now! Yesterday was Alaine's birthday party ... she is turning 10 OMG can you believe it! She is out of the single digits FOREVER! I am so excited for her and so sad at the same time. she is a preteen or I guess the new term is Tween! But that is another post in itself.
Anyway she was wanting to have a party at Sweet and Sassy which is a pretty expensive childrens salon that does awesome but EXPENSIVE parties and one of them was a spa party. We cannot afford those extravagant parties so I proposed the idea of a spa party here at the house. She LOVED the idea so I ran with the idea and planned all kinds of cool stuff for the kids to do. I told Alaine that her and her friends will be making their own body glitter and bath salts and we would be doing nail painting as well. She was super excited!
About 2 hours before the party was to start I had to run to the store for a few drinks for the kids and Alaine asked to go with. She we hop in the car and drive to publix. On our way from the car into the store comes my SUPER PROUD MOMMY moment. Alaine was sorta halfway talking to me and halfway talking to herself and proudly says "My Mom is the coolest mom ever!" Can you believe it ... I am not only a good mom but I am THE COOLEST mom ever! I am pretty sure I will not always be the coolest mom, especially when freedom and boys and parties enter the scene as a teenager but for now I am kind of liking that title! And I have to say that Alaine is such a great kid, she has got to be the coolest 10 year old ever!
PS she also thinks I amthe ROCKINEST cake decorater ever her cake is the hannah montana one in my photos.
Amanda - aka the COOLEST mom EVER!
Wow...thanks for posting this. I am so happy for you. I think it is so great that you have embraced motherhood and that Alaine loves you so much. You have clearly been her angel and you two are blessed to have each other.
I hope I am "the coolest mom ever" someday. My kids are little now, so a lot of what I do goes unthanked and unnoticed, but hopefully they love and treasure me as much as I do them.
That is a very very cool Hannah Montana cake by the way!
OMG friend, I almost started crying when I was reading your story. You go girl! You deserve it.
BTW, your cake is awesome.
I'm a step-mom too, and I think that's great! I know the boys think of me as their "other" mother, but my step daughter and I never hit it off.
I'm so happy for you!
Congratulations! That is a great stage to be at. First it's the "pretty mom", like when you get fixed up to go somewhere, then it's the "coolest mom" when you do good things and then (I'm at this point w/my 13 year old) it's the "mom grew two heads and doesn't have a clue" stage and don't forget the rolling of the eyes! It still has it's perks, like sharing clothes, going to moviecure night (movie/pedicure), so enjoy, some things get worse but alot get better.
Congratulations on being the "coolest mom ever'"as that title doesn't come easily. Being a stepparent is not the easiest job in the world. I have had stepchildren and my children have had stepfathers. Working things out takes lots of time and patience and sometimes just doesn't happen. You are very lucky.
My daughter has been a stepparent since her marriage 11 years ago. They have full custody of her stepdaughter but have to deal with the "mother from hell" continuously. My daughter does all the work and the parenting and then has to deal with all the "attitude" when my granddaughter comes home from her visitations with her biological mother. She changes boyfriends (or girlfriends, depending on her sexual preference at the time) like most people change their socks. Keeps my granddaughter totally confused.
Keep up the good work as a mom. By the way, the cake is gorgeous!
Diane
you made me cry!!!!
I have a 14 1/2 year old who just went to her first homecoming dance as a sophmore and boy did I cry when she came down those stairs all dressed up like that. My baby is gone....but here is a crazy, yelling, sometimes lovable, some times moody, loves me/ hates me, beautiful young lady I will never have on lap again but here sits my daughter who looks to me to help her through teenage hood! Now that's love and trust!
You hug that baby to you and hold on. Then you step back and watch her run.
Aww I got a lump in my throat too! You can rest assured that you have made it with a seal of approval like that. High Praise Indeed!
beautiful cake and story!!! I have been a fulltime step-parent to 2 boys as well as the natural mom to my own 2 sons. It hasn't always been that easy for me but moments like these make it definitely worth while. Also, she'll remember these special times you gave her forever...that's a for sure!!
Congratulations "coolest mom"! I know how happy and proud you must feel.
My stepsons were 6 and 9 when I married their father and adopted them when they were 12 and 15. The oldest is now 30 and getting married in March. He told me the other day that he wanted to let me know that Becky (his real mom) will be coming to the wedding. (She lives in another state.) His father and I haven't even heard from her since the day she told me I could adopt them. Anyway, he then went on to tell me that even though she is coming, I am the one who will be seated as his mom and I'm the one whose name will be on the invitations. He told me that as far as he's concerned, I'm his mom because I'm the one who has always been there for him and I'm the one he knows he can always count on, no matter what. By then we were both crying. I think that was the most special thing I've ever been told, especially since my husband and I were not able to have any of our own. I'm one happy MOM!
okay, i gotta stop reading this....i'm crying and smiling at the same time!!!
have a wonderful day!
My daughter is a "stepmom" also, and she has to travel alot with her job... she was leaving for a week long stint last month, and the 11 year old son told her " it just doesnt' seem like HOME when you aren't here!".... They boys don't even live with them.... Kids are AMAZING !!
Congratulations "coolest mom"! I know how happy and proud you must feel.
My stepsons were 6 and 9 when I married their father and adopted them when they were 12 and 15. The oldest is now 30 and getting married in March. He told me the other day that he wanted to let me know that Becky (his real mom) will be coming to the wedding. (She lives in another state.) His father and I haven't even heard from her since the day she told me I could adopt them. Anyway, he then went on to tell me that even though she is coming, I am the one who will be seated as his mom and I'm the one whose name will be on the invitations. He told me that as far as he's concerned, I'm his mom because I'm the one who has always been there for him and I'm the one he knows he can always count on, no matter what. By then we were both crying. I think that was the most special thing I've ever been told, especially since my husband and I were not able to have any of our own. I'm one happy MOM!
That is amazing. I love hearing stories like that when the kids become adults. You ARE one lucky Mom!
My husband is step dad to my oldest. We never used the "step" term.
People in our church never knew this until my son got up to speak at a youth group dinner given for the parents. He stood up to speak and this is what he said----
I am the luckiest person in the world. I have 3 fathers that would die for me. One of my fathers has already died for me. That is my heavenly father. Second is my biological father. And third is my Daddy. Then he looked at my husband and said thank you for always being my Daddy.
Needless to say we were both sobbing by the time he got done with his speech.
I am happy for you that your daughter and you have the relationship you have. It takes a great person to step and make that special bond!!!!!!
Lu
My husband is step dad to my oldest. We never used the "step" term.
People in our church never knew this until my son got up to speak at a youth group dinner given for the parents. He stood up to speak and this is what he said----
I am the luckiest person in the world. I have 3 fathers that would die for me. One of my fathers has already died for me. That is my heavenly father. Second is my biological father. And third is my Daddy. Then he looked at my husband and said thank you for always being my Daddy.
Needless to say we were both sobbing by the time he got done with his speech.
I am happy for you that your daughter and you have the relationship you have. It takes a great person to step and make that special bond!!!!!!
Lu
Your story brought tears to my eyes. I love hearing things like this because even though I am mom right now it worries me that I will no longer be primary "mom" when her bio mom comes back into her life. this makes me hold out hope that I will still be seen the same way by her regardless of our future situation.
I need a tissue...for real!
These stories are wonderful!
lu9129, I lost it completely, reading your's.
Thank ya'll for sharing!
COOLIST MOM EVER!
I guarantee you a million times over that when bio mom in back it will wear out fast. When the gifts quit coming and the fun places to go stop. Just sit back and watch. Then when she has her first breakup or someone has said something nasty about her in school. She will shove bio mom out of the way to bet to her real mommy to be held. She knows who her mommy is.
Believe me, I have seen this in action.
Hugs!
Lu
Wow, if my kids weren't here I'd be balling although I do have tears right now. These stories are wonderful.
Congrats Amanda on being one cool mom - I aspire to have that title too! My kids think I am cool now (they're 5 & 3 ) but coming from a 10 yr old - that's wonderful.
Wow Lu9129,,,,,,,,,,,you have me bawling. It is so wonderful to hear such great stories about step families. Too many times we hear all the horror stories. We do not use the term step in our family either. I think that makes a world of difference in how everyone feels.
Diane
Sometimes those great mom moments are hard to come by. That is so sweet. I'm sure you guys had a great party too!
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