I wasn't attacking CakemanOH for their OPINION. I was simply doing exactly what they did to the OP for what the OP did.

CakemanOH basically attacked Gwen (OP) for doing the right thing here, and for being proud of it, and did so by throwing out the "it's not the Christian thing to do" comment.

So it's the Christian thing to do when you attack someone for being "rude" or standing up for themselves and not being a doormat?

You can't have it both ways, you can't sit there and preach your "Christian way" of thinking and living, and then have people be nice to you and agree with you because you're a child of God. Honey we are all children of God and regardless of what we do, he still loves each and every one of us. It's us that have to answer for what we say and do in our life, when the time comes Gwen will stand up for her own actions and take whatever God hands her for her actions. I strongly believe the good out weighs the bad, Karma will rear it's ugly head, you reap what you sew, what goes around comes around, do unto other's as you'd have them do unto you.... I strongly believe Gwen would want someone to slap her back to reality if she were acting like a spoilt brat at 30 some years of age and being rude and manipulating people left and right... I know I would want someone to yank be back to reality and remind me I am a grown woman and need to act like one.

You come in and push your beliefs ("It's not the Christian thing to do, why didn't you just LIE and say you were booked?") on all of us and don't expect anyone to have a come back? Since when are Christians ALLOWED to LIE? Telling someone something that isn't so is a LIE anyway you cut it! "Sorry I'm booked" when you aren't is a plain faced lie. So you condone her lying but not standing up for herself??? Give it a rest! You can't have it both ways.

APPLAUSE! APPLAUSE! OhMyGoodies!!!

I believe this post was meant as one where a story was told and I'm here listening. This post isn't about Gwen asking you what you think but rather stating that this happened... take it or leave it! Sort of like, I'm not asking for your permission but rather telling you what I'm doing.

I've been doing forums and chatting for over 8 years now and the worst thing you can bring to these places are religion and politics.

Let's talk cake!!!

got a picture of the cake CarolynGwen?
just kidding :p

I thought it was beautiful that the little girl saw you at the school and thanked you for the cake. It sounds like she has more class than her mom.

Carolyn Gwen,

You are AWESOME! Thank you for not letting the moocher get away with that.

It sounds like she is the kind of person who if you politely told her no and you don't like being taken advantage of then she would have turned directly to her next victim until she got what she wanted. You can talk and reason with some people until you are blue in the face but sometimes it takes a good object lesson to get it through their darn thick skulls.

It reminds me of when Bill Cosby caught his son lying. He took him out back for a "talk" and the boy was afraid of getting spanked. Bill said he wouldn't spank him but didn't like it when he was lied to. When they agreed the son wouldn't lie anymore he turned around and walked away and Bill kicked him in the bottom. The boy turned around with a hurt look and Bill said "It hurts when people lie to you, doesn't it?"

Now if you had burnt the cake to a crisp so it was inedible that would have been a touch spiteful but otherwise the kids got to eat good birthday cake while the mother hopefully learned a lesson that will humble her a bit.

First of all, CG I give you a standing ovation! I wish I had the guts to do that! As far as I'm concerned, CG did do the right thing. Could she have handled it better?....probably. But would the woman have got the point?....probably not! It sounds like this woman did this type of stuff all the time. Even her own mother laughed at it! She's lucky she got a cake at all. She could have been stuck without any cake. The birthday girl was happy with the cake she received, so it didn't ruin anything except the mom's dignity. But sometimes it takes something like that to realize what an a$# you really are. For those of you who are coming down on her for doing this, you have the right to your own opinion as to how you would handle it. But you don't need to come in here and bash her for standing up for herself and her son. Way to go CarolynGwen!

Oh my...I can't believe that I am even getting involved with this thread but here goes...

All that keeps coming to mind is Dr. Phil's saying: "You teach people how to treat you." I know that it is easier said than done, but if you don't let other people know where you stand, then you can't expect them to know and unfortunately there are those who will run all over you and take advantage of you until you "teach" them how you expect to be treated. Now there are many ways of going about doing this. I tend to be on the CHICKEN side of things and people do take advantage of me, but I just consider it my own fault for not standing up to them. People will only take advantage of you if you let them.

Now, on to my other point...
I am a Christian and I feel very strongly about my beliefs, HOWEVER, I do not feel that CC or any other online forum is the right place to try to win others for the Lord...it always comes across as being "holier than thou" or as "judgement." The best thing to do (IMHO) is to leave religion out of this...there are too many other factors that come into play and it's easy to talk the talk, but the proof is in how we live our lives everyday. That is the real testimony to the world. I always hate it when "Christians" go on reality shows and start spewing scripture (usually taken out of context) and pushing their beliefs onto other people and they (the Christians) can usually be seen cussing someone out or lying or something else...it just gives us Christians a bad image. It would be better just to leave it out and let people see it in you w/o having to mention it every time you get a chance. Like I said, the proof is in your character and how you live your everyday life.

Just my 2 cents!

lET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, i AM GIVING YOU AN STANDING OVATION RIGHT NOW!!!! I run a day care in my home, it's arts and craft time and I'm on the laptop in the room with the kids; and all my kids stood up and gave you one too. They don't know why, they're just happy with me. I would of handled the situation the same way. I love the fact that she was made to look foolish and ignorant in front of the other moms. Her mom busting a gut, and her hubby not coming to her defense and leaving, PRICELESS!!

This woman sounds like a B@*ch, who has a lot of S@*T with her. Seems like the family knows this and friends just found out. Good for you! You don't reward people for bad behavior!!

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, I AM GIVING YOU AN STANDING OVATION RIGHT NOW!!!! I run a day care in my home, it's arts and craft time and I'm on the laptop in the room with the kids; and all my kids stood up and gave you one too. They don't know why, they're just happy with me. I would of handled the situation the same way. I love the fact that she was made to look foolish and ignorant in front of the other moms. Her mom busting a gut, and her hubby not coming to her defense and leaving, PRICELESS!!

This woman sounds like a B@*ch, who has a lot of S@*T with her. Seems like the family knows this and friends just found out. Good for you! You don't reward people for bad behavior!!

I've been in this situation soooo many times, I have one particular friend who seems to have so many functions and always calls me to make the cakes - I always get told how she has a little gift for me after the cake is delivered, but I've yet to receive anything. The only thing I consider is that I am doing something nice for somebody and God is watching my actions and he will reward me one day.

I have only read through page 6, so excuse me if I miss something key, but there are times and reasons to "go over the top" and being asked the night before the party, being asked to bring a free cake and the invitee not being able to ADMIT that the invitation was only for the cake was WAY over the top for the other mom.

Sure, a completely appropriate response could have been, "I'm sorry, I will NOT make a free cake for your daughter and we will not be attending and it is exceptionally rude to ask me such a thing."

MAYBE the birthday girl's mom might have been humbled and felt bad about what she was really up to, but based on what's been presented, I don't think she would have "learned her lesson". My guess? She would have gone to everyone at that party saying how RUDE the cake lady was to her on the phone and she refused to make a cake and can you BELIEVE how unprofessional this cake professional is? The guests would have only her side of the story and now the cake professional looks bad for no fault of her own... Don't you think this could have been the outcome?

By GOING to the party, by letting ALL see, no one can dispute what happened... did the birthday mom deny the last minute invitation? Did the birthday mom deny wanting a FANCY free cake??? No.... and no one will come to her defense about her ULTRA rude behavior.

And, I'm sorry... there is protecting our children, but there is also letting them know they can't get everything they want and why protect them for something they can learn from. If that daughter got upset, it's TOTALLY not the cake decorator's fault. The cake decorator made sure there was a cake so that the girl had something... it was the girl's MOM who would have been responsible for upsetting her daughter and maybe the birthday girl would learn something about trying to be a cheapskate as she can't POSSIBLY be learning good things from her mother in that respect.

Now, could this have hur the cake decorator's rep? Maybe... but I think more than anything, people will be more respectful and actually pay for cakes. I think she would have been hurt more if the daughter's mother would have been able to present her lopsided version about the phone conversation.

And all this Christian talk - can we stop that please? NOt everyone here is Christian and being Christian doesn't make you a good or bad person... What's important is that we all need to learn to respect each other and RELIGION has nothing to do with that (or all religions are about that... so it's not the RELIGION that's key, but learning to live together is... isn't that what most religions are trying to get people to do anyway? A guide to helping us all live together better?)... and this whole episode was about trying to feel respected and not trodden upon.

Melissa

Typical situation where I wish I had CBoS... dad just called and said mom wanted to talk to me about the cake... I thought he was refering to the cake I made for her picnic at work 2 weeks ago (golf theme in pics), but I call thinking somethings wrong and turns out she doesn't even speak of that cake....

She proceeds to tell me my youngest nephew wants a wrestling cake just like his brother got. I told her his cake cost $56.00 and if she wasn't paying for it it was his gift... she then told me I was rude and shouldn't have said that infront of him (my other nephews birthday cake... not the new order) and that "he's your nephew you should buy him a nice gift to go with it" Well I gave up I didn't push it anymore I let it go...

So now she tells me "Is your dad still there?" I explained he wasn't here yet he had called and she said "Well when he gets there get the $20.00 for the cake from him if he has it on him and tell him I'll give it back to him when I get off work, if not just come to work and pick it up from me." So I replied back to that in shock a little at the price she wanted to pay and said "Ok so you want the same size as the golf cake?" she said "Well yeah I guess if they eat it all then good hope we don't run out." I have good mind to tell Dad it's $30.00 not $20.00 and then let them argue over it lol. But I know she'll end up winning that arguement so I won't... I just wish I was able to have Gwen's CBoS right now because I would've explained to her as nicely as possible that I just can't do that cake for $20.00.... maybe I can muster it up lol....

That is the best "you get what you paid for" story I have ever heard. I can NOT believe you did that! You go girl!

It's frustrating being taken advantage of. Soon you begin to think all you're good for is a cake and nothing else. Yeah, you really showed her. I hope she felt really embarrassed. Her husband was smart too to get the heck out of there.

You finally had enough of people asking for free cakes from you just because the know you! As a favor once is fine but to be expected all the time......NO!!!!!



Amy

CG
I havent read through all the pages and assume Im repeating somethings but........................YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!! I would have loved to be a fly on that wall. And You are not evil , just fed up. Im so glad someone finally did something like this. You are an inspiration to us all!!!!!!!! And the MIL,,,,to fuuny

You go girl!

I DON'T feel sorry for the daughter. She learned a valuable life lesson, not to be SELFISH and take advantage of people.

Great for you standing up for yourself. The little girl obviously didn't mind. She was happy with it. The only one who looked bad was the mother of the girl.

Ohhhh....
Last I checked, it wasn't "Christian" to pass judgement!

Tell em' Oh My Goodies!

I'm so sick of people always preaching to people about the christian thing to do. Where is the christianity from some of these rude, ignorant or direspectful people? I beleieve you should treat people the way you want to be treated. I want to be treated fairly, kindly and with respect; so I try to give just like that. Now we shouldn't expect people to treat us the same way; and if they don't where is it a rule or law that we have to put up with it or we can't or shouldn't stand up for ourselves? From my experience (and I'm not saying every person) some people who are in church every Sun. and sometimes during the week, who claim they are christians, are the biggest hypocrites!! They are the ones who are always talking about someone, telling other peoples personal business and creating drama every chance they ge; but you never hear or know they f@#$$& up sh@#!

Well, you certainly made a statement. I would have replied with a simple RSVP & declined the invite and the opportunity to provide the free cake. I have been asked to do free baked goods for fundraisers, b-days or celebrations for family or close friends. I do them if I want to and I have time, not because I feel pressure to do so. If I don't want to do it, I'm very upfront and tell them a simple no. I would have never taken it that far. I couldn't have handled it that way and felt good about. But everyone handles things differently.
I feel badly that some of you have been taken advantage of. You certainly don't need that in your life, you don't have to put up with it. I would just simply smile and then tell them a firm "no". I promise.. It works like a charm.

Damm after reading through virtually all of 10 pages and now I'm running late with dinner!

Ok where do I start off. Well first off, to the OP well done you stuck up for your child and put the mom in her place, sometimes you have to say and do things in front of other people as otherwise they just wont get the message espeically if this person is always a scrounge (freeloader). Ok she got her pride dented a lil but oh well, sometimes peoples pride has to be hurt in order for them to see the error of their ways!

Where I come from I was brought up by parents who speak their mind and dont care if it hurts, (had that last night and I"m almost 30!), I also used to hang out with girls who would bring you down a peg or two in a heart beat and try and call you out at any given opportunity. So at times I can and will come across as rude, but other times I can come across as the nicest person in world. JUST DONT MESS WITH MY BABIES! Ok so my point here is any mother would flip if she knew that another mother was taking advantage of her child, children can and will be cruel and if they found out that the child was only invited "just because of his mom" then who know's what kinda nasty lil comments the other kids would have made to that child.

And finally to the people who always bring "Religion" up into the the mix! I am a Christian "church of England" to be exact (the one where King Henry made up so that he could get divorced - also the one which our Queen is also head of) Neways onto my point - People who believe that they are true christians dont always play by the rules and this is my biggest pet peeve, I see people go to church all the time, yet they be ones drinking up a storm in the clubs and bitching and back stabbing like no tomorrow. I have my religion and most people dont know it, I dont live by the book and I dont try to either, my religion is personal to me and that is all that counts.

Well time to make dinner and I'll get off my soap box now.

Rach

While some applaud the way this was handled, others may feel like it could have been done differently. I believe that I have to do things that make me feel good about myself but I'm judging anyone.. Why is this turning into a Christianity and morality debate? This thread is a little out of hand.

AMEN to you sister!

Its not like she showed up with a pan of poo!! The little girl still got a cake, her son was spared the "pity" invite and the Mom was taught a lesson, and the OP stood up for herself. I see no harm in what was done.


And isnt passing judgement on the op and thoes who laughed at what happened very Un Christian?
Not to mention lying about being busy on the day of the b-day. Thats why I cant handle too much church, its just a bunch of people putting on a show for one another, but behind closed doors its ok to be un-christian, as long as know one finds out.

The man with no sin should cast the very first stone.

I know there comes a time when enough is enough...I've had all I can stands and I can't stands no more. It sounds like that time had come for you.

I am still at the point where I would've just turned her down to begin with without making a spectacle of her.

Sometimes, even at the last minute, and even though there are ulterior motives, a kid just likes to be included. If my kids ask me to do it for someone else, I ask my kids if they would like me to. If they say yes, then I do it. If they say no or it doesn't matter to them, I don't.

A friendly reminder... politics and religion need to be left at the "virtual door". There are plenty of websites to hold those discussions, CakeCentral is not the appropriate place. Those topics only lead to division and upset members.

If anyone has a problem with this policy, please complain to me privately via PM and not here in the forum...

Thank you Heath. Can we now just get back to cake and enjoying each other for our own unique talents? Everyone here is so talented, let's be friends and support each other. Can someone tell me how much crisco weighs??????????