Had to vent.....

My fiance is everything I could ever ask for in a man.
He is strong, kind, enduring, hard working..and loves me to death.

But he JUST WON'T GET OVER MY EX.

My ex is so far off in my brain, I'm completely indifferent to him.
He's not part of my life, I haven't even thougt about him in a long time.

That is why I don't understand why my fiance keeps bringing him up.
Like he has these dreams, where he sees me and my ex having sex.

Last night I was talking to him all intimate-like, and he brings up my ex and ruins it all.

I just don't get it.

Ugh, I'm sorry! That does suck. When my husband and I were engaged he was being so protective of me and obnoxious about my male co-workers. It got soooo old. I finally told him if he didn't trust me when I told him that HE was the only one I loved then we had a SERIOUS problem! It took him a little while, but it blew over! Have you told him that his obsession over your ex bugs you?
Good luck! I hope this passes!!

My husband and I are so blessed because neither of us have that petty jealousy thing. I have male friends ... .he has female friends. I have an ex that he used to refer to as "My husband-in-law".

Jealousy and possessiveness (are there too many "S"'s in that word?) are not attractive traits. It's insecurity on his part. Not much you can do .... he needs to grow up and get over it.

I'm assuming he wasn't a virgin when you met him, though, right??

he's being insecure...
there may be something about your ex that makes your current fiancee feel somewhat insecure...that in some sense he may not think he's good enough for you...
just sit down and talk to him...figure out what's bothering him so much...and reassure him that's he's the one that you want...

Has he never been with anyone else before? Does he have ex's? Are you still harping over them??? If not, then it's not fair that he's doing it to you.

Neither one of us were each other's firsts.
But....my ex and I were together for like 1 year and a half and he never had a serious relationship just kind of dated and one night stands.

That bothers him.

And yes I tell him every time how I don't like him constantly bringing up my past.

It would be a deal breaker for me.

I divorced a possesive control freak. It is NOT a good life. It starts like this and has the potential of elevating to something much much worse.

You don't want to end up like me .... bent backwards over the sink with his hands around my throat and my vision fading to black ......

I would be worried about this too, I know my hubby had girls in the past, and he was even engaged once. But I don't bring them up and act jealous about them. (In fact the ex-fiance I would love to give her a piece of my mind because of what she did to him. )
I've had a few guys that I dated, but nothing serious. Sometimes he gets cautious around them if I run into them, but that hasn't happened in ages.

I also think this is one of those things you need to work through BEFORE marriage....its hard enough when their are only 2 people to consider, but if he keeps bringing a 3rd (the ex) into the marriage it will really be miserable.

Before I got married the church I belong too made us do some pre-marital couseling..... it was actually kind of neat, brought up things I never would have thought to discuss and we took a test to see where we were most compatible and where we needed the most "work". Having only been married 5 years I dont have the knowledge of others but I would really try and get through this ex stuff first.

I agree with indydebi.....this would be a deal-breaker for me.
When is your wedding date?
I'd have a serious talk with him, then have some sort of "the ex is gone forever ceremony," such as writing his name on a balloon, maybe include some reasons why you're divorced, then pledging that the two of you will never bring up his name again, then let the balloon go to drift away. Let the guy know about your concerns re power/control/jealousy. If he can't stop bringing it up, I'd have to dump him.
"Nice guys" hurt women all the time. Extreme jealousy is a red flag. Please don't ignore it.

I had the same problem with a guy that I was seeing a long time ago. He was the relationship after me having a serious 4 1/2 year relationship. No matter how many times I told him that I did not want my ex anymore he just never let up. He was very insecure plus a big momma's boy. I think the big problem was his mother kept putting ideas in his head. After a while the relationship ended. It's better that it ended because I feel that he never really trusted me, even though I never gave him any reason to doubt me. If your fiance can't get past his issue with this then IMHO the relationship will not last. It just tells me that he's very insecure and does not trust you. Nip this in the bud or it will end the relationship. Good luck!