i just sent a deposit back for a wedding cake to be made this year in may.this bride has been kinda difficult from the beginning. after phone calls with numerous questions she was to come out for a consultation, called that day and changed it for the next sat. thats fine with me, stuff happens. so the next sat. shes a no show, and no call. so i forget about her. then she calls another week later and wants to come out, i said ok, she proceeds to tell me she wants to taste this flavor and that flavor, and im thinking...you just called and are coming over right now and telling me flavors?... i did the best i could to accomidate her in such a short notice. so she tastes the samples and gives her opinions. the groom doesnt try anything, ok, maybe he just doesnt like cake. i hear this alot, they just get the cakes for the guests, not everyone is a sweet eater...(this i dont understand..hehe!) anyway she asks me if she brought over filling from a popular chef here in town would i use this inbetween my cakes. i told her no, its not my product and maybe she should get a cake from him.

after a couple more phone calls and them coming to a bridal show im at do they decide to go with me. i just recieved the deposit check in the mail yesterday, so i havent even opened it and done the necessary paperwork. she calls this morning to see if i got the deposit check, i was telling her yes, when she says..i need to size the wedding cake down because im getting individual cakes for each table!?! ...im thinking from who?..i kept listening to what she had to say before i spoke up, shes telling me about someone else doing those cakes!! finally i said i can do the cakes for each table also and she hasnt discussed this with me. of course its a friend doing the cakes as a gift for free. so i told her i wouldnt do her cake if shes getting cakes done elsewhere, my husband is standing in the kitchen with a puzzled look, like what did he just hear.lol.i explained that all the cakes need to be from my business or i wouldnt do her cake. i told her i dont know what the other cakes will taste like or look like and they will reflect on my business.

but why am i feeling bad about this?

in the past i have had a bride ''lie''to me saying there wedding wasnt as big as expected and wouldnt be needing the cupcakes she ordered, so i delivered a 2 tier cake, walked in and there was sheet cakes from another bakery ( and they didnt look good at all!) i wanted to take the cake and not leave it, but i did leave the cake.

what does everyone else do? are you letting other people provide cakes too?

No, I don't want other cakes when I'm providing cake. If they aren't the same quality as mine, it gives a bad impression about my cakes. People will assume that they cakes were made by the same person.

Also, there's liability to consider. Suppose someone get sick from other cake? How do you know which one it was? Just like catering - I do catering, but no other food is allowed with mine. Just to protect my name and my business.

How about that you just don't need the stress of this high maintenance bride! If you've already had this much trouble, look out for what is on the horizon! SHE WON'T CHANGE!

I wouldn't do it, regardless of the other cakes on the table.

You do the right thing. Anytime your gut tells you there could be trouble, you're right to trust it! I've been there before too!

its amazing how ppl call pull all sorts of stunts eh!

it's never easy, but with bides, as soon as they start to plan their wedding they turn into monsters! Bridezilla's literely!

Good luck to u and i would have sent the check back as well. After all, one door closed is another door opened!

Hmm I kinda feel bad here - I did a groom's cake for a couple that had the wedding cake made by a friend....... there was an OBVIOUS difference in the cakes though so I'm pretty sure no one thought they were made by the same people. I didn't attend the wedding but my mother and her friend did and they said the wedding cake was three tiers but only one layer on each tier...... and that the icing tasted gritty..... not sure what the other person did.... my cake was a huge tank (it turned out a lot bigger than I intended!) covered in buttercream and fondant........ (in my photos). I kinda felt bad when I heard about the other cake b/c I didn't want to make the bridesmaid who made that cake feel bad...... but they asked me to make the groom's cake and I went all out (like I usually do!). I just had no clue the other cake would be so bad..... I didn't worry about my reputation with the other cake being there.... maybe I should have.

I completely understand though when it's a professional business..... I don't think there should be two competitor cakes there - throws people off and you're completely right about the liability of someone getting sick from the other cake or something........

I guess my only thing is that I definitely can do grooms cakes but I'm afraid of wedding cakes since I'm not licensed (I only do friends and family) and the pressure to make it so perfect is crazy! But I could understand if someone ordered a wedding cake from someone and got the groom's cake from someone else b/c maybe the groom's cake is a carved cake or something that the wedding decorator can't or won't do..... still an iffy situation I guess......

just checked out your gallery....your cakes are awesome....I say her loss.....(and I wouldnt be surprised if she comes back begging).

I am glad you sent back the money............not only did she sound like a bridezilla, but you are right - if the other cakes s*cked, it would reflect bad on you even though you did not bake them. It's not like someone was going to tell everyone who made the extra cakes. To me, that is awful nervy. If the friend is that good, she can make the wedding cake also.

Deb

I definitely agree with the others on this one. You don't need the stress. I wouldn't want anyone else to provide additional cakes. You are right in thinking that people will think one person did them all and this could reflect negatively on your own work. There will be plenty of other brides!

"Hello, Olive Garden? I'd like to make a reservation for 50 people. We'll need your salad but I'm bringing my own spaghetti and my aunt is bringing the lasagna."

Yeah ..... THAT'LL work!

I have to say I differ a bit on this. You are bringing a product into a place - it's not people bringing things into your bakery. If it were me, I would not have a problem with someone else bringing cakes also - BUT - and this is a HUGE BUT! I think you are doing the right thing in this situation - if it were someone you knew, or a super nice bride who wanted your showstopper cake (your cakes are gorgeous) for the centerpiece, but could not afford enough for everyone - I would be willing to work with her. But this is a different situation - it's the bride I'd have a problem with and that seems like the deal here with you. So.... you have no reason to feel bad, you made the right decision!
I can understand where people are coming from not wanting to have their cakes mixed up with others. So I think everyone has a valid point and you just have to go with your gut!

My biggest fear is dealing with a difficult Bride. I would have done the same as you.

You didn't say why you felt bad. Because you turned down the Bride or because you lost an order?

I'm still laughing about your husband, mine would have done the same.

I wouldn't want to do a cake where someone else was doing the cake too. I would want people to know "my" work.

I can't believe the story about the sheet cake It's like the wedding party gets the good stuff and the guest gets the cake from the grocery store

The earlier post about liability is very very valid, though. Guests won't care to find out which cake they ate. They will ask "who made the wedding cake?" They will be told "Debi did" and that's the name they give to their attorney when they decide to sue for something. 4 months down the road, how can you prove it wasn't YOUR cake/icing/filling that caused the problem?

I think you did the right thing. You never know how the other cakes might reflect on you.

I don't really see a problem with the bride's and groom's cakes coming from other places, but I would never want one of my cakes on display while everyone else is served something else.

I'm not relying on cakes for my livlihood and not near as busy doing them as many of you here but I'd dump her tooshie. You did the right thing sending back her deposit. She's trying to pull one screwy thing after another. My bet is she'd change her mind on you a few times before you knew what you were actually doing for her wedding. Life is too short to mess around with some of these types.

Good for you! I think you did the right thing. Be strong when she comes begging you to take her back. Or charge her up the wazoo with a contract stating in bold type NO CHANGES AFTER __________.

I've never done a wedding cake or dealt with a bride but I'd have to say you did the right thing. She would be more trouble down the road if this is how it all starts. I also agree that if her friend is good enough to make the table cakes then she can make the big cake too. Now you have that date free for a nice bride.

You did the right thing--absolutely!

It's amazing the lengths people will go to at times to save a buck! I guess it's time to add another caveat to the contract:

"All cake(s), edible or display, for this event MUST be supplied by me, XYZ. If cake(s), edible or display, are provided by anyone other than myself, I will NOT deliver my cake(s) and THERE WILL BE NO REFUND OF ANY MONIES. The undelivered cake must be picked up from me the day after the event or I will dispose of it at my discretion.

Have them initial it and then explain the reasons about liability, the need for consistency, retaining your reputation, etc.

Rae

My contract says...
"Couture Cake is to be the sole provider of cake and/or confections at the event. Failure to comply with this clause will result in a loss of completed cake and/or confections and entire payment at no compensation to the purchaser. In the event another LICENSED, AND approved (see 1a.) bakery is providing a portion of the cake/confections for the event, it shall be disclosed at the time of first deposit before the event
Disclosed licensed retail food handler must deliver cake/confections to the venue.
a.  Disclosure: ______________________
b.  Item(s)provided: _________________"

and P.S. I think you did the right thing trusting your instinct... Chances are she's going to come groveling back to you when she finds out her buddy can't make her cake ... Of course, you'll be booked already for her date

Indy your hilarious!

Not only is all of the cakes there (yours or not) a reflection on you, if something bad was to happen because of ill proper storage with the other cake -- you would be in question also. Totaly not worth it! You did the right thing for your business returning the deposit check.

Sometimes you just have to "kick 'em to the curb"!!

Good for you in going with your gut feeling while being put on the spot!

Well my opinion is a little different then most of you.

I agree that you did the right thing in dumping her. I would have too. Not because other cakes were going to be supplied but because she was a pain.

The argument about being sued, however, is not a very strong one, because guests could get sick from any number of things at the wedding. It is not likely they would blame the cake, more likely they'd blame the food. What about the caterer being blamed, or the bartending contractor, or the person who made/provided the edible wedding favors? Are you going to provide all those things too to avoid being wrongfully sued?

Also, brides have wedding and grooms cakes made from different bakers all the time. I had my wedding cake made by a professional in town (before I started making cakes), while my husband had his groom's cake made by his aunt. Let me tell you, the cake his aunt made was SPECTACULAR. It was a sleeping dragon with incredible detail and tasted delicious. Mine was a simple 3-tiered red cake. It was nice but not as fancy as my hubby's.

My point is, everyone made sure to give credit to his aunt for making his dragon cake. Although my cake was good and looked nice, no one asked who made it. No one cared. If they had, I would have given credit to the right bakery. Life went on.....

The reality is that it's a cover your buns issue first and foremost. The other is business reputation and sourcing of food (food safety and local/state laws). I have NO problem doing a groom's cake only when another baker is doing the wedding cake and I'm TOLD about it as is the other baker. I could care less to tell you the truth as long as I know. We used two different bakers for our wedding because the one baker wouldn't do 6" table cakes, she absolutely REFUSED to even quote them. Because of politics, we had her still make the picture cake, but we used another baker, AND we made sure that both knew the other was doing what they were, neither one had a problem with it because they knew it was because the photo cake baker wouldn't do what we wanted for any price.

The issue is when you're told "I'm only having 100 guests so only need cake for that many because we can't afford it on our dishwasher's wages" and you get there, the room is formally set up for 400 in the grand ballroom, and you see Costco sheet cakes to finish out the 300 servings. Yes, Costco puts out a good product, but the point is, they didn't disclose the TRUTH to you as the baker and your reputation and product is on the line.

It does come down to the food safety issue in a HACCP plan. A guest comes late and only ate cake that day, comes down with salmonella, in the hospital for a few weeks, gets better. Guess where the sourcing is done and who gets sued. It's the reason for insurance, you have it to protect you from the unknown and in order to prove there wasn't clear negligence on your part, you have to do what is right for the amount of risk you personally want to take. Having Aunt Ethel bake the individual cakes is great, if Aunt Ethel owns a bakery, otherwise, sorry Aunt Ethel.

It's a whole argument, but the "what if" is what is being protected against with just simple steps.

I had one of my best cookie customers do a similar thing - she wanted the individual doll cakes for her daughter's party and needed 23 of them. She knew that would overwhelm me because I already had another cake order for the same day. She likes to go ALL OUT for her kid's birthday parties, and she even said she had to have a showstopper - that people were expecting it!!!! (Can you believe that??? Her daughter was turning 4!!!) To help me out, she ordered a plain cake (I think it was 16" & 14" rounds) from another bakery that she has always been very loyal to and spent literally thousands of dollars at over the years. (She didn't know I did cakes until recently, and was brave and decided to give me a try!) Anyway, after making the last doll cake, I was never so glad to see a tiered cake ready and waiting for me to embellish it and give it that 'WOW' factor that she was looking for. Before I put the pillow topper on, I actually took a forkful of cake (maybe a tablespoon size hole) from the center of the top layer to taste it and luckily it was very moist and comparable to my cakes. i filled up the hole and added my special touch and I must admit, I love the decorating the best and to not have to stress and worry about getting the cake mixed and baked and torted, etc. ... it was really nice.

I do think in this case you made the right decision - once a Bridezilla....like she would have calmed down right before the wedding???

From the bakery's perspective, I'm sure they were very curious why she wanted such a large cake with zero embellishment on it, and then ask for a cup of each color frosting??? If I were them, I might not have filled that order.