Sorry to say, but that woman is a NUT CASE !!!
I have a niece, who is deathly allergic to anything dairy, beef or pork
No one in my family would ever be angry at a person, who honestly says even an hour before an event, that something FREE could not be made.I would most definately be angry, if something supplied free would cause my niece to end up in Intensive care or worse, just because, someone has not done their homework
I do use all those ingerdients in my kitchen, BUT before I cook or bake for my niece, I double check and clean my kitchen to hell and beyond, including buying new utensils, something which I have done for complete strangers, but i have expected them to pay for this. I have baked for allergic kids, but the parents must agree (and sign) that they understand, that I usually cook and bake normally for my family and other, but because i know, what these allergic kids go through, i do my best to accomodate them. I wash everthing down, only offer limited stuff to allergic kids and have customers bring me the milk or margerine that their kids can eat,i if I can't get them here. I have had customers, whose kids have never had a cake for their birthdays, because no bakery out here would make them, and if they would offer that, the parents would not trust them anyway (I live in Chine)
For allergic customers, I dictate what I can or cannot do, NOT the other way around, because I wash everything I use first with soap, then vinegar, then in a dishwasher, that has been previously run in a disinfectant mode TWICE. I do that, because I know what the kids miss out on otherwise, and I would NEVER expect a complete stranger to do something like that for free, just because I "won" a normal cake.
I totally agree to everything you're saying, i did spend 8 hours cleaning a CLEAN kitchen just to ensure everything was SUPER sanitized.. I should have read my Lindt chocolate bars before doing 8 hours of cleaning! I used to work at subway and before you either wash or get done with washing the bowls ect. I would dip them all into some blue solution, I went as far as calling subway and asked what that blue stuff was so that I could go buy it. My DH thought I was loosing it! I just DID NOT want anything to happen to her child! Oh and I was reported to fb some how and can not send messages for a whole entire month! This is where I get most of my business growl! I had my mother inlaw go through our entire conversation and she didn't see a thing wrong with what I said... So now I'm blocked from sending messages for no reason.. note I asked my inlaw to read it because she will turn red if i say 1 swear word in front of her lol!!