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The friend/customer who made me quit (a long story) - Page 6

post #76 of 108
Originally Posted by BlakesCakes

Actually, this experience points out why you should WANT to start a paying business.

With a paying business, you wouldn't have been begging for the money for ingredients....
With a paying business, you wouldn't have had the woman hovering over you at the grocery store or at home while you're baking.
With a paying business, you never would have allowed her to touch those cookies....
With a paying business, you never would have hitched a ride with DH
With a paying business, when someone claimed that the mother had done most of the work on the cake, you would have loudly told her that she was dead wrong.....

With a paying business, you'd never, ever, have to tolerate beggars wanting to be choosers...

With a paying business, you would have heard the words "not enough money left over for the cake" and you WOULD HAVE TOLD HER TO GO ELSEWHERE FOR HER CAKE.............

This will sound harsh, and it's not meant to be but I don't know how else to put have every right to be angry with these people, but you can only be taken advantage of by others if YOU allow them to do it. You did, and I'd imagine that deep down, you're angry with yourself right now. It's natural & it's OK. Learn from it.

Once they ASK you for the cake, YOU are in the driver's seat and YOU need to stop the bus the second they try to grab the wheel.


Ditto 10 times!!!! ----

And yes reading your post made my blood boil. What it got to me was when she told you to leave and come back to cut the cake, what???!!! just like a servant huh? wow, she has some nerve... but like Rae said people can only take advantage if YOU allow it---it's YOUR call not theirs. So, lesson learned and move on.
I'm also a hobby baker and I've had people that forget to say 'thank you' or complaint that the cake was 'too sweet' or act demanding when they're getting a free cake, etc ---well, you know what? when those peope come back and ask for another free cake you know what I say? a very definite and clear "NO" that's it.

Good luck to you and don't let people discourage you from doing something you enjoy.
"Life is cake!"
"Life is cake!"
post #77 of 108
As I was reading this I could feel my blood pressure rising! This is over the top ridiculous. There are so many red flags!! You weren't even getting paid for it. I can't believe they treated you like that. I have learned from experience, that if you don't put your foot down, people will walk all over you. You can't let that happen. ESPECIALLY since you aren't getting paid!
The last straw is that lady who said not to take credit for her work. I bet you wanted to throw that cake in her face and leave!
Don't let this discourage you, let it be a lesson learned...YOU make the rules and if people don't want to abide by them...PEACE!
post #78 of 108
icon_biggrin.gif I am a Chef and run my business baking custom cakes from my home. I have been fortunate enough to never run into a situation like yours. Perhaps it is my training as a Chef that taught me to guard myself and my work, or maybe I just work for nicer people! When I am contacted by a client for an order, I get up front what they are expecting, and I let them know what I am willing and able to do for them. NEVER WORK FOR are telling them your work is worthless! Let them know what your bill will be and don't let anyone push you around! Your cakes are great, I would hate to see you let one bad apple spoil your ambitions! You just gotta get business savvy and toughen up! Good Luck!!
post #79 of 108
I know exactly how you feel! This "FREE" Cake thing ha happened to me alot along with the "DISCOUNT" Cake! I think people watch Cake Boss and all those other cake shows and that's the cake they want. I really wih they would how the prices for Duffs cakes and all the other cake how prices. People want the $2500.00 cake they aw on TV for $50.00! I don't do cakes too much anymore just for that reason.
post #80 of 108
Why on earth would you want to quit. You make AMAZING cakes and have such a beautiful talent. You could continue to go after your dream. I try to learn something with every project I take on and this would definitely be a learning experience. I'm sure this will NEVER happen again because you know better now. The next time anyone tries to get a "free" cake, you'll turn the other way (especially if they're not family or a close friend).

Please don't get discouraged. It's people like you that give me (a novice a baking) inspiration with the beautiful cakes you make.
post #81 of 108
OMG this is really frightening and easily might have become my story if i hadn't said no.

A neighbour who moved into our apt recently had kids who got freindly with mine so i invited her to my kids b'day party. I had made a big cake and lotsa goodies, sugar candies , lollies, caramel apples, jellos and some indian snacks as well.

She behaved rudely in my kid's party and both her kids came when only one was invited. i din't mind as the more the merrier and my hubby gave them both return gifts. these kids at first turned up their noses when they saw the gift which was a pretty cool volley ball. but later came back and took it.

She had asked me earlier to become an organizer for her kid's gala event. I hardly knew her and i'm just a hobby baker. i have although made some stuff for close friends' parties. i told that lady i am not into this professionally and i politely refused.

She still kept on pestering by calling up afterwards. i just ignored her calls and then didn't speak when I saw her outside in the apt grounds. I had a bit of an idea of her snooty and arrogant attitude from frens.
the kids altough kept meeting in the bus as they go to the same school and they had a few arguments.

and then her elder kid started bullying my baby doll. and now and i am really stressed out on the whole issue.

After this, at the school bus stop, where we pick up our kids, She even tried to force money in my purse in lieu of the return gifts i gave her kids when they came to my kid's party, which i shirked away.
I felt like crying that day. I was so shocked i was shivering the whole day.

till now i can't sleep at night thinking bout the bullying and name calling happening to my kiddo in the bus and school. Past three days she has come home sad and depressed.

but then you see meaner people and get some courage.

Mean People SUCK
post #82 of 108
I,ve replied a couple pages back. I have reread this story by Judi and i think she is pulling our legs lol!!! The title of the thread was friend/customer.. she was neither. She was a neighbor that Judi doesn,t even know that well. When she told me that my house was messy and that it was ugly etc. (rest of the story) thats when i would have went off on her and stopped at what i was doing and let that be that. It was a good story though, lol!! too many pretty cakes and too much knowlege to do something for free for practice.
post #83 of 108
I find it hard to believe that the OP went thru all this supposed abuse, and then ended the story by taking her kids walking through a bad part of town.
post #84 of 108
Thread Starter 
I've noticed that whenever there's a long thread, someone starts calling the OP a liar. Here's a question...what would I have to gain from making up something like this?

The woman I baked for lives two blocks away, which is actually a neighborhood built by a different builder. Her house is twice the square footage of mine, but mine has 10 foot ceilings and lots of nice upgrades like 42" cabinets and ceramic tile, a bay window in the kitchen, and the hubby has put in nice light fixtures. My kids have been in her house and said it was dirty and looked like they were in the middle of moving in, although they've been in their house a couple years longer than I've been in mine. I met this woman about a year ago when I started riding a bike for exercise and have probably talked to her once a month since then, sometimes for more than an hour. My kids have played with her youngest child, we've seen them at neighborhood events, run into each other at yard sales, etc.

The reason I didn't stop making the cake when she started going on about my house was that I can't stand to leave a project unfinished, and also it's hard to quit in the middle of things, I had all the fondant made, the gumpaste work done, the boards cut and covered, and the cakes half baked. There was no way she could have turned it all into a cake at that point. I didn't want to leave her kids without a cake.

And yes, we did end up walking after we dropped off the cake...I was going to call a cab, but it was so late that I figured hubby would be off work any minute. I had condensed my cake kit into what would fit in a quart bag so I'd be able to stick it in my purse and just go. It was a little weird taking the carseat into Garden Ridge, but nobody said anything to me. We just stuck the carseat into the cart and my 6 year old sat on it while we shopped. I never know what time my husband is getting off work, it could be 5pm or it could be midnight.
post #85 of 108
Why on earth are you trying to justify yourself to the last two posters?
There is nothing to gain from what you wrote. You just needed to vent and that is what you did.Some people just need drama. They should go bake a cake.
post #86 of 108
Texasrose, what a shame you encountered such a horrible woman . She has the problem and in my experience, is not the norm. I too make cakes and started with family and friends, then started getting requests from friends of friends and it's grown from there.

I posted a picture of a Moshi Monster cake I'd made on facebook and one of my sister's friends 'liked' the photo. One of her work colleagues saw the photo and was gobsmacked as the lady who'd ordered the cake had claimed she'd made it herself for her daughter's birthday. Just shows, she'll be found out in the end, mark my words!! As a laugh, the work colleague asked her how she'd made the Moshis - I wish I'd been there to hear her response.

In my experience, the majority of people who order cakes are extremely appreciative and delighted with their cake and appreciate the hard work and skill it takes to make them ( plus the late nights). I love seeing their faces and reaction, it truly is the best part of the cake making/decorating experience . icon_evil.gificon_biggrin.gif

Keep calm and carry on.... best wishes Debbie in the Isle of Man
post #87 of 108

I never doubted your story. Sad as it is, you can't make this crap up.
Fall down 7 times....get up 8
Fall down 7 times....get up 8
post #88 of 108
So sorry you got taken advantage of like that. Sadly, there are people like that in this world. They obviously did not appreciate what you were doing for them, and completely underestimated the value of what they were getting and all the time and hard work that went into it. It's mind boggling that the husband did not grasp the idea that you were not getting paid for what you were doing and acted as if he was doing you some kind of favor! I'm not sure if you want encouragement to pursue starting a business or not, so I will not speak to that, but I do agree with those who said you should just take some time to pick yourself up and reflect on what you really, really want. You are obviously a very nice person, and you handled the situation as graciously as anyone could have. I applaud you for that!

I'm also sorry you came here to share your disappointment with others and instead of giving support, or just not saying anything, some felt compelled to question your honesty instead of taking your words at face value. I always like to give someone the benefit of a doubt before sending them to the electric chair!
post #89 of 108
Originally Posted by karateka


I never doubted your story. Sad as it is, you can't make this crap up.

agreed icon_sad.gif
It's not "just"'s my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
It's not "just"'s my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
post #90 of 108
I don't think any one will go to these lengths to grab attention. i do believe texasrose's story is correct.
and yes its really difficult to drop things midway. if one has made sugarpaste figures and half the cakes, one does want to finish the project off, no matter what the difficulties.

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