There was an interesting story in the news recently about a bride who allegedly FAKED cancer so she could guilt people into giving her the wedding of her dreams. She even duped the groom, according to the reports. She got free flowers and gown, and deeply discounted catering arrangements.
She stomped all over the kindness of people.
Ok whats with people faking cancer lately???? There is a woman here, who got caught faking cancer (shaved all her hair off to help her lie) to collect donations...... $20000 in total
http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/844614
I have gotten an email similar to this. She was a young girl who did not have much money and still wanted a great wedding so she was getting all her wedding stuff for free. She asked me if I would donate a cake for her wedding. I can't believe the nerve of some people. If you don't have money for a wedding go to city hall don't try to get everything for free.
There was an interesting story in the news recently about a bride who allegedly FAKED cancer so she could guilt people into giving her the wedding of her dreams. She even duped the groom, according to the reports. She got free flowers and gown, and deeply discounted catering arrangements.
She stomped all over the kindness of people.
Ok whats with people faking cancer lately???? There is a woman here, who got caught faking cancer (shaved all her hair off to help her lie) to collect donations...... $20000 in total
http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/844614
What about the wackadoo who threw acid in her own face? There are nutjobs everywhere.
It's not a new concept and Star Jones wasn't the first to think it up. I've seen this circulate every 7-10 years or so and EVERYONE thinks they are the first to come up with the idea.
here's my blog on why I would NOT sponsor one: http://cateritsimple.blogspot.com/search/label/sponsored
Feel free to direct your brides to the blog with your "You've got to be kidding me!" response! 
Debi,
I read your blog and it just reinforces a lesson I learned the hard way. There is a member of my extended family whose premature baby died of SIDS in January, it was absolutely heart-wrenching for anyone who knows her to see her go through it. Shortly after the tragic death, she got engaged to the baby's father and they set their wedding date for the birthdate of the baby. I, of course, offered to do the cake for free. She said it would be a simple, casual wedding with just a few close friends. She offered to pay for materials and I said no, because I thought it would be a small cake and not cost much. The next thing I know, she's inviting people on FB- "come one and all!" and she has 500+ friends! She never did give me a final count, but a few days before the wedding said it would be about 200 people. This meant a big cake, and I had to use my kitchen rental timeslot (normally reserved for paid cakes- I do family cakes at home). I made a 5 tier cake, the bottom one being 14" and on down to 6", it cost me upwards of $200 to make. The wedding was at a goat farm, outside. The spot that was set up for the cake was in direct sun, 98 degree weather and flies everywhere. The cake ended up getting covered in plastic to keep the flies off! The bride got on the microphone and thanked the people that let her use the venue for free, the people who helped with the food, the DJ and several others- but not me! I give her a pass on a certain level because of what she has been through. When I asked her to write a testimonial, she wrote a rave review and it was very touching. It was a financial hardship for me, but in my heart I feel like I did a good thing and I do truly care for this person. That being said, I can't afford to do that again! And it does sting a little that she neglected to thank me. I know my cake had more monetary value than just about anything else that was donated. Anyway, thankyou Debi for helping me to think in a more business-like way- I know i can say no to things I can't afford to do in the future and to pick and choose who to help when i can.
We got the same email from the same bride. I responded to her, "Unless you are a celebrity and the cake will be seen on national television, I can't imagine an professional baker taking you up on your offer. Good luck with your wedding planning."
hahaha! I love it!
As a bride to be, this is actually something that I have read about as a suggestion on how to have a budget wedding. The idea being that in exchange for quite a bit of free advertising (in the program, on the menu card, business cards at the cake table, on the slideshow, etc.) some bakeries may be willing to offer free/discounted cakes or other services (photographer, dj, etc.)
However, knowing the expense of these things, I understand that is asking a lot. I think the correct way couples should approach this would be as a business arrangement. A discount off the order in exchange for listing the company name/information in multiple place. If the couple is willing to put that much free advertisement for you throughout their reception, I think it is acceptable to offer a small discount. Think about how much you would pay otherwise for advertising.
I understand this arrangement is not for everyone. But I think it's also important to understand both sides of the argument. This is not necessarily people being greedy and trying to get things for free, but rather a possible business arrangment. And, again, it may not be for you, bu tthe idea is out there for budget brides-to-be and I'm sure many more will get similar requests.
Think about how much you would pay otherwise for advertising.
I doubt any bakery would pay for advertising at a private wedding reception. The cake is the advertisement, and if people really love it they will ask the bride or groom for the name of the bakery.
I agree with your approach of starting the negotiations with a small discount instead of a free cake, but at the end of the day if the cake busts your budget you will need to cut back somewhere else or settle for a cheaper cake.
My birthday is coming up soon. Would anyone like to sponsor my party? I'd like a really big, fancy cake; gourmet food--and lots of it; open bar; live music; and expensive gifts. I want it all--for free.
I promise to print your names in the program, and tell all my friends how generous you were.
Any takers?
My birthday is coming up soon. Would anyone like to sponsor my party? I'd like a really big, fancy cake; gourmet food--and lots of it; open bar; live music; and expensive gifts. I want it all--for free.
I promise to print your names in the program, and tell all my friends how generous you were.
Any takers?
Think about how much you would pay otherwise for advertising.
I think it all depends on what kind of advertising you want to do.
If you do a free, donated or discounted cake for someone for advertising then that could say to many people that you do free, donated or discounted cakes for free advertising.
As a bride to be, this is actually something that I have read about as a suggestion on how to have a budget wedding. The idea being that in exchange for quite a bit of free advertising (in the program, on the menu card, business cards at the cake table, on the slideshow, etc.) some bakeries may be willing to offer free/discounted cakes or other services (photographer, dj, etc.)
However, knowing the expense of these things, I understand that is asking a lot. I think the correct way couples should approach this would be as a business arrangement. A discount off the order in exchange for listing the company name/information in multiple place. If the couple is willing to put that much free advertisement for you throughout their reception, I think it is acceptable to offer a small discount. Think about how much you would pay otherwise for advertising.
I understand this arrangement is not for everyone. But I think it's also important to understand both sides of the argument. This is not necessarily people being greedy and trying to get things for free, but rather a possible business arrangment. And, again, it may not be for you, bu tthe idea is out there for budget brides-to-be and I'm sure many more will get similar requests.
IMO if you are a bride on a budget then either cut your guest list or consider a different type of reception that stays within your budget.
If you haven't read Indydebi's blog on this you really should. It addresses the whole "pay for advertising" thing that brides thing is the selling point for this (ridiculous) idea.
The magazines that are suggesting this to budget brides are not doing them any favors.
That is just crazy! Want to hear another one?
There is a local jazz singer who will be getting married next Sunday in our area. She and her fiance invited their guests to their wedding by posting it on FB! The text read something like, "You're invited to the biggest show of our lives!" Then it proceeded with the date/time/place, and then ended with this:
$30 per person
$50 per couple
I was so taken aback that I wrote to her (btw, she is the only FB friend I have that I have not ever personally met), asking why she was doing this. She replied that the venue cost X, the security cost Y, and the band (her 12-piece band of which she's the lead singer) was costing Z, and they were "musicians who can't afford to walk down the street." Asking her guests to contribute made perfect sense to her.
It doesn't to me! 
That is just crazy! Want to hear another one?
There is a local jazz singer who will be getting married next Sunday in our area. She and her fiance invited their guests to their wedding by posting it on FB! The text read something like, "You're invited to the biggest show of our lives!" Then it proceeded with the date/time/place, and then ended with this:
$30 per person
$50 per couple
I was so taken aback that I wrote to her (btw, she is the only FB friend I have that I have not ever personally met), asking why she was doing this. She replied that the venue cost X, the security cost Y, and the band (her 12-piece band of which she's the lead singer) was costing Z, and they were "musicians who can't afford to walk down the street." Asking her guests to contribute made perfect sense to her.
It doesn't to me!
I went to a wedding of some friends I did their cakes (the black & white topsy turvey in my photos) for them as a gift. So imagine my surprise when at the reception we were handed special menus devised just for their wedding to choose from and the prices were listed. I asked the waiter if that was a printing mistake and he said no that the guests had to purchase their own meals. I got up and left. The retail value of the cakes I did for them (wedding & grooms cakes) was over $1500, I was not about to spend my own money to buy my dinner when the least expensive thing on there was $23 for a grilled chicken Caesar salad! I drove a mile down the road and ate McDonalds for $3 bucks...LOL!
cakesdivine .... that is incredible. incredible that two people getting married would think it was ok to run their reception like a for-profit restaurant!! My question on situations like this is "How were they raised to where they think this is ok?" Was there not a parent or some other "adult" standing in the wings telling them, "ok wait a minute .... you're not REALLY going to do that, are you?"
But we see it so often, I'm begining to believe the old saying about "common sense isn't so common". 
The retail value of the cakes I did for them (wedding & grooms cakes) was over $1500, I was not about to spend my own money to buy my dinner when the least expensive thing on there was $23 for a grilled chicken Caesar salad!
Wow, no way!!...the guest had to pay for their food??? did they, at least, send you a thank you card for the gorgeous cake you made for them??
Good thing you left I would had done the same.
Yes I did receive a thank you card for the cakes and she gave me a rave review testimony as well. And she and her husband are friends of mine who have helped me out financially a time or two which is why I had no qualms about giving them that expensive of a gift. But, the reception costing me money on top of that, not only no, but H*LL no!...LOL!
I have never said to her how tacky that was nor was there any warning in their invites that this would be the case either. She and her hubby are a bit younger than me and my honey, I am thinking it is a generational thing maybe. Generation Y conceptual thinking maybe?
I guess the thing that really made me flinch was the fact that this couple has money. They own the largest cheer gym in our area and have over 1000 students. The had 2 weddings, one for family and a few close friends in Mexico where they flew everyone there, paid for their travel and everything else, then came home and had another ceremony and reception for all their other friends, They had about 150 people at their second wedding a week later and took about 25 with them to Mexico.
Money is really not an object for them. They do live pretty frugal however. But I love them both. They are great people, just went a little awry on the reception food issue.
Since I didn't stay I don't know how many of the other guests stayed, but it must have been alot because they didn't have much cake left to take home and she was hoping there would be alot left for their family to take home with them and eat on over the week...LOL!
Okay after re-reading my post it occurred to me that maybe the reason the cake got hit hard was because no one ate dinner...LOL! Plus the cake was awesome tasting, if I do say so myself. 
edited to add: Indy, the reception took place at a high end restaurant and wine bar.
Since I didn't stay I don't know how many of the other guests stayed, but it must have been alot because they didn't have much cake left to take home and she was hoping there would be alot left for their family to take home with them and eat on over the week...LOL!
MAYBE the other guests just ate free cake, and didn't buy dinner, so there was no leftover cake. Wait.... I wonder if they charged for a slice of your free cake!
tacky, tacky, tacky. A wedding is a celebration of love between two people, not a business arrangement. Can't afford a big wedding? Have a small, simple ceremony or go to the courthouse.
WOW some people just are not scared to ask for stuff they shouldnt be. I dont mind donating $20 bucks for this or that, but a wedding cake for "200 of our closest and dearest friends" is a little out there.
I read this and I just keep flashing to this image of a wedding with banners hanging like at carnivals and race tracks that say sponsered by___ and a sign on the brides back saying "sponsered by David's Bridal"
LOL
As a bride to be, this is actually something that I have read about as a suggestion on how to have a budget wedding. The idea being that in exchange for quite a bit of free advertising (in the program, on the menu card, business cards at the cake table, on the slideshow, etc.) some bakeries may be willing to offer free/discounted cakes or other services (photographer, dj, etc.)
However, knowing the expense of these things, I understand that is asking a lot. I think the correct way couples should approach this would be as a business arrangement. A discount off the order in exchange for listing the company name/information in multiple place. If the couple is willing to put that much free advertisement for you throughout their reception, I think it is acceptable to offer a small discount. Think about how much you would pay otherwise for advertising.
I understand this arrangement is not for everyone. But I think it's also important to understand both sides of the argument. This is not necessarily people being greedy and trying to get things for free, but rather a possible business arrangment. And, again, it may not be for you, bu tthe idea is out there for budget brides-to-be and I'm sure many more will get similar requests.
Are you kidding me 
Are you getting married or having a footy match bbq where you want the butcher to supply the sausages?
If you can't afford the marriage you want then have the marriage you can afford.
And i can assure you - i can get more publicity with 5 lines in a newspaper too 15,000 readers than what i would at a wedding of 50 - 100 guests.
Honestly - i find your way of thinking the height of rudeness and to say *This is not necessarily people being greedy and trying to get things for free, but rather a possible business arrangment.*
.............. is exactely what it is.
*And, again, it may not be for you, but the idea is out there for budget brides-to-be and I'm sure many more will get similar requests.*
............Thats not being on a budget - you have no budget
Being on a budget means - you have $xxx dollars - for a wedding so you work within those $xxx dollars. never read anything so "can i do a deal for youuuu" when it comes to something as important as a marriage.
Its all rather 
and comes across so cheap and nasty.
If any bride came to me with that proposal - i would ROFL and then shut the door..........................then ROFL some more.
spare me....
Bluehue
That is just crazy! Want to hear another one?
There is a local jazz singer who will be getting married next Sunday in our area. She and her fiance invited their guests to their wedding by posting it on FB! The text read something like, "You're invited to the biggest show of our lives!" Then it proceeded with the date/time/place, and then ended with this:
$30 per person
$50 per couple
I was so taken aback that I wrote to her (btw, she is the only FB friend I have that I have not ever personally met), asking why she was doing this. She replied that the venue cost X, the security cost Y, and the band (her 12-piece band of which she's the lead singer) was costing Z, and they were "musicians who can't afford to walk down the street." Asking her guests to contribute made perfect sense to her.
It doesn't to me!
Hey if I can skip the gift, then this is a bargain! hahahaha!
To the bride who posted "the other side".
I agree with others have said...Set a budget and if you can't afford your "dream" wedding, then postpone your wedding till you can, or but back on the guest list or something. Advertersing at a wedding to me is not the same as advertising for a magazine.
A couple of years ago, I had a gal approach me with her portfolio and asked if she could design some brochures for me in exchange for a wedding cake. her work was AMAZING and she had a very nice list of credentials. I not only did her wedding cake, but her grooms cake and she made me the most amazing brochures I never could have afforded otherwise. THAT was worth it and that to me a smart bride! So if you got something really great to offer as a barter, then go for it. But banners with bright lights at a wedding saying who made the cake? No thanks!
[Quote] "The idea being that in exchange for quite a bit of free advertising (in the program, on the menu card, business cards at the cake table, on the slideshow, etc.) some bakeries may be willing to offer free/discounted cakes or other services (photographer, dj, etc.)..." [quote]
Everyone at a wedding is not a soon to be bride and very few people at a wedding are in the market for a cake worth 'wedding cake" money. So this is a loose loose all around. I don't even do family cakes for free anymore.
Whoever wrote that article just needed to fill white space on his paper.
Hey, Mr. Car Dealer,
Why don't you give me a free car, and I'll drive it with one of those license plate frames with your name on it? Free advertising for you, free car for me!
Imagine how many people will see it!
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