I had a consulation/tasting this past weekend and everything went fine. Her and her fiance both liked the cake/pricing/design. She said they wanted to use me for the cake. I sent them a contract the next day and reminded them they have 72 hours to decide what if they want to put down a deposit to save their date, etc.

She emails me today - the last few hours of the 72 hour deposit period - and says she would like to talk to other brides that used me for their wedding cakes. She asked for phone numbers/email addresses.

Just wondering if this is normal? I am still very new to doing wedding cakes and feel a little weird about giving out my other customers information. I have testimonials from the couple wedding cakes I have done recently and would be happy to provide those for her.

Any help would be appreciated! Thanks.

I would not give ANY customer information without their permission. I know I wouldn't be happy if my phone number or email was given to a stranger without my knowledge.

definitely DON'T give out your other customers' information!!!!


I would tell her that you aren't at liberty to share their info with her, but that you will contact some of them yourself and ask if they'd be willing to contact HER and then you can give your PAST customers HER information, not the other way around.

I would be furious if I ordered a wedding cake from someone and they gave out my personal info! That would be very BAD business ethics as far as I'm concerned.


Send her the testimonials and if that doesn't suffice...then offer to contact a couple of the brides. If she balks at the idea, ask her how SHE would like it if you gave HER personal information to future brides of yours!

That is exactly how I felt! I would be livid if someone gave my info out. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to be rude to her. Thanks! I will email her back and hope for the best.

Yes, please, for the love of goodness, don't have out that info unless you have asked the other brides! Tell her that you can give HER number to some of your brides and if they CHOOSE to they can call her. But again, she will miss that 72 hour window and your price quote is no longer guaranteed, nor is that date. If no one else books it in that time, fine, otherwise she might be 'out'. Good luck to you.

Sometimes I wonder if some of these brides have a manual about how to be the biggest PITA bridezilla ever!!! And I Don't do wedding cakes or even cakes for sale, but the stories I've heard and read. lol

I responded to her saying I was not able to provide that info but would be happy to contact past brides and provide them her contact info. I also sent a link to the testimonials page and asked if there any concerns she was having that I would be able to help her with.

It really threw me off because she seemed happy with the tasting. I dont know what she would want to talk to them about? The cake is only for about 100 people, simple single dot design with ribbon around each tier, and it is at a private residence that is very close to my bakery. It has made me really wonder what she wants to know..

Wow! You're not going to be babysitting their kids just making their freaking cake!!! What's next? A credit and background check?

No way.... freedom of privacy of information act...... what a PITA.....their not buying a huse for god sakes....

To be the devil's advocate I do understand maybe hearing from at least one other person that has used a bakery that all things went well however I think providing thank you notes, etc with no name information should show that previous customers were satisified with your work. I have actually had a client very recently send a thank you email and in it she said she would be happy to talk to any potential customers regarding how good my services were so I'm sure you must have at least 1 recent client that you went above and beyond for that would be willing to do you a favor.

I had this exact same request from a bride I recently did a consultation with. I was a little perplexed as well, until the Mother of the Bride showed me a checklist she'd downloaded from some website that said to ALWAYS ask your cake designer for references. I contacted three of my former brides and asked them if they'd be willing to give references; all three said yes and gave me permission to share their email address with my potential bride. She talked with 2 of the 3 and booked with me a couple days later. I just wish I knew where she got that original checklist that said to ask for references.

She's asking for references. I can't see anything wrong with that. It would be a good idea to ask a couple of your previous super-satisfied customers whether they would be prepared to provide a reference for you on the odd occasion that someone asks for one.

Definitely contact previous brides and give the current bride's information to the old brides. =o)

Let us know what happens!

Do you save testimonials from past clients? You could compile a few of those with first names only to send her...?

Of course if she doesn't trust you enough to think you are sending genuine testimonials or that you will honor your contract, she should just go somewhere else anyway (Hm that didn't come out right...I just meant...you won't enjoy working with her if there is that much lack of trust.)

I would not give her my customers info, just let her know it's to protect your customer's information, not because you have something to worry about.

UPDATE!

I had emailed her stating that I could contact past brides and provide her info to them so they could contact her and I gave her the link to my testimonials page.

She emailed back and said I did not need to contact brides because she read the testimonials on my site and looked at pics of my cakes and decided I can "perform adequately".

Now she is wants to only pay for half of the cake up front and the rest on delivery because that is what her wedding adviser said was customary. I have never heard of that? I always get paid in full prior to making the actual cake. I have them put down a deposit to save the date and the remaining balance is due two weeks prior to the wedding.I do have a clause in my contract, though, saying basically that if I mess the cake up beyond repair, the bride gets a % refund - but it is said in much better terms to cover my butt.

I have been incredibly lucky so far to only have had absolutely wonderful brides. They are helpful, up front, calm, and really nice. So this is my first experience that isn't so easy (and I have been waiting for it because I knew it was going to happen!!)

So do I tell her no, I go by my contract and the total is due before the wedding?

Thanks again for everyone's advice and info!!!

I get paid in full 3 weeks prior. It is absolutely NOT customary to pay vendors on the day of.

I take a deposit to hold the date and the full payment is due 3 weeks prior to delivery/setup. I would stick to your policy!! I would definitely not be taking her payment upon delivery.. what if she decided the cake was NOT adequate enough for her wedding day? Then you would be stuck!!

Definitely stick to your policy! It is NOT customary to pay the remainder on the day of. The wedding party is so busy with other things that they dont have time to go from vendor to vendor to pay the remaining balance. Sheesh, tell the bride to get a grip.

Yup, I have a testimonials page for our events and cakes. As for payment...50% down at booking and full payment 30 days before the event. Never EVER get paid the day of the event. Chances are you will be setting the cake up in a semi empty room and everyone who has money will be with the Bride or Groom and not have the money ready for you.

"Definitely contact previous brides and give the current bride's information to the old brides. =o)

At what point do we become "old brides"; then "old wives"; then the "old nag"; and then the "old ball and chain"?

I say she is trouble and would stay away from that type of costumer.
Edna

People like her is precisely why I only do cakes for family and friends. Tell her to buzz off.

I would not do the cake for her, it sounds like a hassle. That is not how a wedding cake designer gets paid (1/2 up front, the rest the day of). She would more than likely find a problem just so she wouldn't have to pay, or there would be no one around to pay you. Stick to your contract. You can not start bending your contract for everyone who wants it their way!

Tell her "My policy is __% deposit now and full payment by ___ weeks before wedding. You are however more than welcome to tip me on the day of the wedding when you see that I have exceeded you expectations!"

Yeah, like she would only pay half the money for the dress, the rest on the day, after all, she doesn't know yet, whether the dress woudl hold up the whole day??

Get paid in full before, or no cake!