I have family that orders last minute and expects me to do it because they are family. I have said time and again that I can't just whip it up in a day and need adequate time to plan. While some follow this, others call last minute. They assume I have no other orders going on (they don't even ask, just tell me what they want). Also, wishy-washy orders from them. "I may need a cake next week", or "I think I'd like to order some cookies in a week, I will let you know for sure." I have also had them order, I start on it, making fondant decorations, etc. and then they cancel the day before without explanation. They order a good amount from me (and are my best supporters), so I don't want to be rude, but it's stressing me out!

Another issue: Someone in my family loves to bake and loves to take over the holidays. I have tried (as have others) to bring other items and am shunned, (as are the others). I backed off, and just leave family holiday baking to them. It's a break for me, so fine. BUT, what happens when the host insists that I bring the treats and that they will pay me for them? I know this would hurt the other person, but the host doesn't seem to care. They want what they want, and prefer my professional work/taste over the person's who likes to do it for fun. So much so, I was given money upfront and was told they are a paying customer and would not back down. The other person obviously has been doing this for free.
Any advice, does anyone have any similar issues with family? Thanks.

No advice? :(

Hey Dear!

Well I completely understand your dilemma and frustration! I've been in your shoes (not exactly the same ones but :)).

Anyways, my advice for you is to treat them like customers, or let's just say loyal customers, but that doesn't mean the rules don't apply to them. You can give them discounts or whatever privilege you can give them to make them feel special but they can't just cancel last minute without expecting any consequences (i.e a fee to pay). What if they were ordering from a bakery and they had a cancellation policy? The same should be applied with you. You are your business and you have other orders and you get paid for your time just as much as any other bakery and they should know that.

I think being direct, but obviously not rude, is the way to go.

As for that other issue, I think you should keep on backing off if you are being shunned but if the host is paying you then why not take it? You deserve it, even if it is family and even if this other person is baking. You should feel proud that they are asking you and paying you fro your service. That's a good thing! :) 

Try your best not to take things personal and keep things professional with everyone so no misunderstandings or annoyances occur.

Hope my perspective helped!

Best,

Myriam

This is your BUSINESS, and if you don't take care of it, you won't have it anymore.

Make a family~wide announcement and simply let them know that you're serious about making your business work; therefore, all orders will be treated as business orders. Let them know what you'll do for them as family as Mash said, but make it clear (nicely) that they will be expected to give notice, place orders, pay deposits, etc. And stick to it! 

Expect some push~back and more than a few hurt feelings, but keep in mind that these are the relatives that are going to take advantage anyway. It's up to you to set boundaries and make them stick or they'll run over you.

Easier said than done, I know. Good luck.