nancylee61 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 1:41pm
post #1 of

AHi all, I haven't been doing this for a business, but have read lots of comments about couples buying a smaller wedding cake, and then ordering a sheet cake from Costcos or Sam's Club for the rest of the guests? I understand this is to save on costs, but it seems a wee bit impolite to me. What do you do? Do you ever offer to make the sheet cake for a lower cost? I know that if I were a guest at a wedding, and I saw the couple cut a fabulous cake, and then I got a gross fake frosting cake with chemical taste, I would be feeling like a second class citizen! If they can't afford to feed me, then dont invite me! Thanks for your input! Nancy

26 replies
jason_kraft Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 1:48pm
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A

Original message sent by nancylee61

I know that if I were a guest at a wedding, and I saw the couple cut a fabulous cake, and then I got a gross fake frosting cake with chemical taste, I would be feeling like a second class citizen!

This is exactly what to say to customers who request this.

Kitchen cakes are cheaper to make than nicely decorated multi-tier cakes (since there is less labor involved) but of course they are still more expensive than a Costco cake. If you know that the customer will be supplementing your cake with a Costco cake ahead of time you can reject the order, but if you find out as you are delivering the cake to the venue there's not a whole lot you can do.

Cyndibear 08 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 3:58pm
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AI'd be offended. I'm making my own wedding cake. We don't have many coming but I'm still giving anyone who wants it from the big cake. I get cutting costs n all. Some may not notice cause they are drunk, lol. Cut costs somewhere else....the cake is like your centerpiece besides your dress for a woman.

kvand Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:22pm
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I have rejected a couple of orders due to this.  I don't want guests assuming I made their piece of cake (that tastes like its a year old a made of cardboard) when in fact what they are eating did not come from me at all.  I think its rude to your guests to serve some the "good cake" and some the other cake.  If your guests are not important enough to be served real cake then they shouldn't have been invited. JMO

nancylee61 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:26pm
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AI agree, and good business advice, Jason. I am old school, but I believe in treating every guest who comes to your wedding as an honored guest, not cheap out with some fake chemical cake. Save money elsewhere! When I got married, I had a woman who baked from home make my cake, and it was pricy, but people still tell me how awesome it was 25 years later. I never would have given my guests cheap cake!

And I asked my husband, who is not sensitive about this stuff at all, what he would think if he saw the gorgeous cake cut by bride and groom and then got served a piece of chemical cake. He laughed, and said since he always waits to write the check until the end because he is forgetful, they would get 1/2 of what he had planned because it is insulting. And this from a pretty laid back guy! Nncy

nancylee61 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:29pm
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AYes, kvand, I agree. Don't invite them if they aren't good enough for the good cake. Sigh. Do you watch the bride shows? Are they all that difficult to deal with generally? They all seem so narcissistic, and so "I want to be a princess!" I don't think I have wedding cakes anywhere in my future. Nancy

jason_kraft Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:33pm
post #7 of

A

Original message sent by nancylee61

Yes, kvand, I agree. Don't invite them if they aren't good enough for the good cake. Sigh. Do you watch the bride shows? Are they all that difficult to deal with generally?

No, the brides you see on TV score in the top 1% on the difficulty scale. The brides that are more easygoing and do not generate as much conflict won't make it on TV, since conflict sells and is more interesting to watch.

AZCouture Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:34pm
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Because weddings are no longer about thanking and pampering the guests. The guests who supposedly have been your life long family and friends, and mentors and confidants, and who support you and your union. The people who you love and honor and couldn't have made it this far in life without.

 

Naw, it's not about that. It's about making a Pinterest, swoonworthy, "I DIE", over the top affair.....as cheap as possible, and to see how many registries they can get on. It's a gift grab. It's a "look at me, I'm a PRINCESS damnit, YOU worship me and bring me expensive gifts! But I'm going to cheap out on everything where I can, and I'm certainly not going to spend good money on food...lol! Here's your dumpy sheetcake. Where's my gift? And don't forget to pin twenty-twen-twens on my dress for the dollar dance! Doesn't literally mean, dollars, pffffffffft. Twenties.

 

Oh dear. tapedshut.gif A bit of a rant, eh? icon_lol.gif

AZCouture Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:36pm
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Oh and you bet your sweet Aunt's fanny I talk about the insult factor of the nice cake versus the sheet cake, IF it comes up.

IAmPamCakes Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 4:41pm

AI made a cake for my boyfriend's friend's wedding. They wanted a pretty, small cake for pictures & they ordered sheet cakes from Costco. I was kind of irritated that they spent $500 on a photo booth but wouldn't spend a couple hundred bucks on good cake. Saddest thing, is I gifted the stinkin' cake to them! I didn't tell them it was a gift until I delivered it though, for several reasons. They ordered sheets from Costco, and I explained how the caterer would cut it, but they bought like 4 sheetcakes when the caterer only cut about 1 1/2 of them. So they paid twice as much for their cake anyway. Serves 'em right, I guess.

melanie-1221 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 5:18pm

I have a bride right now wanting a dummy cake. No servings, just an over the top decorated styrofoam cake for pictures and she plans to buy sheet cakes from Sam's to serve.

I won't do it, my name and reputation is being attached to the cake the guests ( who happen to be my family ) think they will be served.

It doesn't even make sense to me.

nancylee61 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 5:28pm

AAZCouture, you had me laughing! What is this nonsense about pinning money to the dress?!? You are making that up, I hope??? Sounds like a stripper, instead of a bride!!

Jason, I hope you are right about most brides being laid back! I am from the NY area, grew up near NYC, and the brides seem a lot more like AZ Couture says! Narcissism run wild!

Pam, that couple got a big helping of karma along with their cheap cakes. How foolish!

And Melanie, if I ever get skilled enough to do weddings, I am with you! If you are going to serve cheap tasteless cakes, I wouldn't want my name anywhere near them, either! Nancy

jason_kraft Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 5:33pm

A

Original message sent by nancylee61

Jason, I hope you are right about most brides being laid back! I am from the NY area, grew up near NYC, and the brides seem a lot more like AZ Couture says! Narcissism run wild!

I wouldn't necessarily say that most brides are laid back, just that they are more laid back than what you see on TV. It's still a stressful time that often includes conflicting preferences, but generally things can be sorted out without too much drama.

Of course there are still bridezillas out there, but in reality a vendor will just dump a customer who causes that many problems. The vendors who appear on TV shows are more willing to put up with the drama in exchange for the advertising exposure.

jason_kraft Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 5:38pm

A

Original message sent by melanie-1221

I have a bride right now wanting a dummy cake. No servings, just an over the top decorated styrofoam cake for pictures and she plans to buy sheet cakes from Sam's to serve. I won't do it, my name and reputation is being attached to the cake the guests ( who happen to be my family ) think they will be served. It doesn't even make sense to me.

Different customers will have different priorities, if a bride is more interested in the appearance of the cake than the taste, then it stands to reason most of the expense will be on the decoration side. Of course, once the bride realizes that the price of a fake multi-tier cake is equivalent to a real multi-tier cake of the same size, they may as well just get the real cake.

There are vendors who specialize in renting out fake cakes, a rented cake coupled with grocery store sheet cakes would be one way to go if budget is an issue.

bct806 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 7:41pm

There are actually businesses that will rent/sell a gorgeous dummy cake so that you can then buy a cheapo cake for your guests to eat. They even have a little spot cutout in the back where you can put a part of the sheet cake and look like you are eating the beautiful fake cake. It was on TLC I think. People don't understand you get what you pay for. I had an amazing cupcake wedding cake at my wedding. It cost but it was worth it. I wouldn't let someone buy my cake knowing they were going to pass off a grocery store cake as mine. It's bad for business. 

AZCouture Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 7:45pm

Oh I'm not kidding! It's called a dollar dance. All the men dance with the bride for a little bit, and pin money on her dress. And the lades dance with the men in some circumstances too. It's for the couple to have cash on their honeymoon. 

jason_kraft Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 7:47pm

A

Original message sent by AZCouture

Oh I'm not kidding! It's called a dollar dance. All the men dance with the bride for a little bit, and pin money on her dress. And the lades dance with the men in some circumstances too. It's for the couple to have cash on their honeymoon. 

This tradition has been going on in some cultures for the past 100 years.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Money_dance

Nubianisme Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 8:10pm

I know box cakes and sheet cakes get slammed but I have had some really yummy sheet cakes and I think WASC is the bomb. I can cook/bake and was raised on scratch cakes so I know the difference at first bite. However, yummy is yummy and I'll take a slice of yummy sheet cake or dump cake anytime. icon_biggrin.gif

Carrie789 Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 8:44pm

Unfortunately, she is not making up the pin money on the bride thing or a "money tree."  I think it is classless and rude. When my daughter got married, her friend encouraged her to have one. I told her I didn't want to be embarrassed in front of relatives and friends for this "public beg." Since I was making the wedding cake saving her hundreds of dollars, she agreed,
 

Sassyzan Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 9:05pm

AThe first time I heard of the dollar dance I thought it was ridiculous and greedy. But I think it's actually kind of sweet after seeing uncles and friends of the bride fork over money out of love and good will for the couple. Plus every one I've ever seen used a pretty satin bag for the $, not pinned to a dress. I would never let someone stick a pin in my silk wedding dress!!! And at the weddings in my family, you get a shot of liquor for your troubles too...

This has Nothing to do with sheet cakes though..... :)

AZCouture Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 9:09pm

And there are plenty of beautiful sheet cakes out there, I don't think anyone here means to lump them all together. Personally, I am speaking of having a gorgeous, tiered, delicious wedding cake, and then serving bulk slabs from the grocery store. 

scrumdiddlycakes Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 9:40pm

I won't provide a cake for a wedding, unless it is the only cake being served.

 

My reasoning is simply if someone sees my cake being cut, then tastes a costco cake, they will assume my cakes are the same quality as grocery store cakes.

 

I will do kitchen cakes for weddings and a smaller decorated cake, to save them some money on labour, but I don't discount it.

TheSugarLab Posted 29 Apr 2013 , 11:57pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassyzan 

The first time I heard of the dollar dance I thought it was ridiculous and greedy. But I think it's actually kind of sweet after seeing uncles and friends of the bride fork over money out of love and good will for the couple. Plus every one I've ever seen used a pretty satin bag for the $, not pinned to a dress. I would never let someone stick a pin in my silk wedding dress!!! And at the weddings in my family, you get a shot of liquor for your troubles too...

This has Nothing to do with sheet cakes though..... icon_smile.gif

I think it can be done tastefully. My oldest brother and sister in law had a money dance at their wedding. It was really cute to see the younger kids waiting in line to dance with the bride. I think the money was pinned to my brother and then my sister in law had a nice purse. It can be tacky if done in the wrong way. 

 

As for the cheap sheet cakes... I agree with pretty much everyone else. I'm not making a gorgeous cake just to have a Costco cake served. I was just at Costco today and they had their buckets of icing underneath some of the pies, probably just for storage. They were pre-colored so the decorators didn't even have to mix colors. The expiration date was August on most of them. CRAZINESS!!! 

Elcee Posted 30 Apr 2013 , 12:02am
Quote:
Originally Posted by AZCouture 

Oh I'm not kidding! It's called a dollar dance. All the men dance with the bride for a little bit, and pin money on her dress. And the lades dance with the men in some circumstances too. It's for the couple to have cash on their honeymoon. 

Money dances are traditional at Greek weddings. While the bride and groom are dancing their first dance all the men throw change at them. It can be painful icon_smile.gif! Usually all the little kids at the wedding run around to pick it up.  Of course, my own Big Fat Greek Wedding was almost 30 years ago; inflation may have upped the ante to dollar bills.

Elcee Posted 30 Apr 2013 , 12:05am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carrie789 

Unfortunately, she is not making up the pin money on the bride thing or a "money tree."  I think it is classless and rude. When my daughter got married, her friend encouraged her to have one. I told her I didn't want to be embarrassed in front of relatives and friends for this "public beg." Since I was making the wedding cake saving her hundreds of dollars, she agreed,
 

I should add, in the Greek tradition, the bride doesn't "have" a money dance. The men take it upon themselves to do it. BIG difference!

Norasmom Posted 30 Apr 2013 , 12:34am

WHO is it that invented the sheet cake swap?   It's just so low class.  (And I really don't associate having money with having class, either.)   I had never heard of such a thing until I started reading this forum.  Ick...the cake is not the place to save money, especially if you're "showing off" with a cake you won't be serving.  

nancylee61 Posted 30 Apr 2013 , 1:09am

AOh, I never heard of the bride dance tradition. Sound like it is a nice tradition in some cultures, and a tasteless money grab for others. It wasn't what I was imagining!

I wasn't referring to the sheet cakes you may make for someone - actually, if a bride wanted to save, I was wondering if you would make a smaller tier cake and then your own sheet cake, so all of the guests get good cake! And actually, I was stunned that brides and grooms would actually treat their guests so shabbily! Very tacky. Thanks for all of your input! Nancy

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