things NOT to ask/say to a baker!

Decorating By step0nmi Updated 11 Jan 2016 , 1:15am by Apti

hbquikcomjamesl Posted 26 Dec 2013 , 4:25am
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AWhich seems fair enough.

Although I've been through situations (not involving cake) in which I was about ready to let the customer have both a full refund and the product in question, simply because I couldn't achieve my own standards. As well, now that I think about it, as one or two in which I actually DID so.

Merry Christmas

hbquikcomjamesl Posted 30 Dec 2013 , 12:08am
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Original message sent by DisneyDreamer

i flat out to him go to costco thats my new answer. he demanded i tell him why i wouldn't make his cake  

Did you answer, "Because you're a cheap-o YUTZ, trying to get a rush job for less than the base price?"

shanter Posted 30 Dec 2013 , 2:45am
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I think he should go on your "No cake for you" list.

onceuponacake Posted 2 Jan 2014 , 12:46am
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AI love how they want to tell us how much they want to pay. Lol

cakecoachonline Posted 2 Jan 2014 , 1:11pm
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My favourite was - 'Can you just knock me up a cake'.    Or 'my sister wants a cake, but she is a bit short of cash - so are you still making cakes?'   One thing is for sure - I DO NOT knock up cakes, neither do I make them for cash strapped people.   If they want one cheap they need to go to Costco or supermarket and fight with all the e numbers it contains.   If they want they can make it themselves, that would be classed as a knocked up cake I guess.   If they want one for free - the only way is to pinch one from a store, that way you get the ingredients for completely free!!!   (Don't try that at home - as you will be in trouble with the law - but why do people expect stuff for low price from the cake decorating world - it makes me MAD)   Kx   

Godot Posted 2 Jan 2014 , 3:14pm
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AOk luv - "knock me up" means something entirely different in th US.:-D

hbquikcomjamesl Posted 2 Jan 2014 , 4:46pm
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Yes. Now if cakes actually could get "knocked-up" (presumably in dark refrigerators) it would solve a lot of problems.

cakecoachonline Posted 3 Jan 2014 , 9:26am
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Ha Ha.  So the differences between UK English and USA English strikes again!!   Seriously in UK you knock up cement as well as knocking up cakes!  (We do have the other version to which you refer too - but it is not so common!)    I was watching re runs of a USA series recently and it did strike me how different our slang language is, and some things that were used on the programme, which we use really lightly, were deemed as massively offensive in USA, actually the use of one word (I wont say it) led to a disciplinary at work on the programme - and we use it as a fun saying to imply someone is useless - it is far more sinister, it would appear in USA.   (Now that got you all wondering what it is!!!)     So apologies if anyone across the pond takes offence at our sayings!   But on the other hand - if you knock up concrete to make an expensive house, the other kind of knocking up turns into much expense, then why on earth is a knocked up cake - deemed as a cheap version???   Things need to change!!! Kx

Godot Posted 3 Jan 2014 , 9:36am
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ATwo nations divided by a common language!

emetz74 Posted 3 Jan 2014 , 10:27am
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I just do cakes for fun but I know a lot of you have people asking for pregnant belly cakes so wouldn't knocking up cakes help you all out? :cool:

laurenlavea Posted 3 Jan 2014 , 11:18am
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Original message sent by costumeczar

Wilton fondant tastes like butt.

Making your own fondant takes about ten minutes and isn't difficult, and it's a heck of a lot cheaper.

I flavour my fondant so it tastes like whatever I want. My favourite is banana essence. Mmmmm

hbquikcomjamesl Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 12:15am
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Have we run out of things not to say?

MBalaska Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 12:21am
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apparently everyone but you.  Make something up for us.

BatterUpCake Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 12:22am
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Well I posted this in another thread earlier, but I don't know whether to be offended or flattered. I did a wedding cake back in June where I also attended the wedding. This couple that were guests raved about the cake. I ran into the woman today and she told me her daughter is getting married in May. She then proceeded to ask what flavor the cake I made for that wedding was because she loved it so much. The impression I got was she wanted a cake that tasted like mine but has another baker in mind. I wanted to say...sure just have your baker call me and I will give her the recipe!! I am flattered that she loved my cake but kind of miffed that it seemed she wanted to get another baker or do it herself...

Gerle Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 12:58am
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You more than likely got the right impression and she had a lot of nerve asking.  If she doesn't want to pay you for baking the wedding cake, she can get tastings from whoever she's working with and see if she can be satisfied with their flavors.  If not.....I'd suggest she hire you, then she'll get exactly what she wants.  Otherwise, I'd say no recipe and no cake for you!

RubinaD Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:09am
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maybe she just wanted to suggest a great flavour to her daughter but couldn't think of the name of the flavour she liked at the June wedding. When she saw you that's when she thought of asking. It will not be exactly the same as yours but maybe the bride is stuck on choosing a flavour? just a thought....

BatterUpCake Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:15am
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as I said I wasnt sure whether to be flattered or offended. Either way I will not be losing sleep over it. I do hope they book a baker soon for a May wedding. And I guarantee someone else's cake of the same flavor will not taste the same as mine as I have made adjustments to all of my recipes.....She may decide to book with me after all. Who knows?

as you wish Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:23am
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AThe little devil in me would so want to make up some obscure flavour to tell her. ;)

as you wish Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:28am
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Original message sent by MBalaska

Do you mean Like.......  'Paradise Angel tears', or 'Madagascar unicorn breath'.....:roll:

Oh, those are good! *must remember for future reference* :)

BatterUpCake Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:33am
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Make up? It was Madagascar Unicorn Breath. Have you been peeking in my recipe book??

BatterUpCake Posted 15 Jan 2014 , 1:40am
post #2457 of 3199 recipes for the most part are MACSMOMS with some tweaks. Not original, and I give her all of the credit. But still not something she could get from anyone else that I know of around here....

angelsmom89 Posted 17 Jan 2014 , 2:18am
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I started teaching myself some decorating techniques almost 35 years ago.  My first roses looked like pink artichokes.  Then I took some Wilton courses and refined my techniques.  I was very eager to start doing wedding cakes for both an artistic outlet as well as making some money.  I really enjoyed it at first, then I started learning that dealing with the clients wasn't all hearts and sunshine.  My policy was 50% down and the rest was due 2 weeks before the wedding.  One client didn't want to pay me the balance until the day of the wedding.  She said, "How do I know if you will show up with the cake?"  I was speechless.  Somehow I had the presence of mind to ask her how I could possibly know if she was giving me a good check the day of the wedding.  She was very insulted by the suggestion that she would write a bad check and proceeded to tell me she had $25,000 in her account.  I ended up getting my money.  She ended up getting her cake 2 weeks later at her wedding, and after the check had cleared.


Another time I did a 75serving 1st Birthday cake for relatives of my BIL's girlfriend.  They said they would pay me after the party which I agreed to since they were almost family.  What a shock!  They didn't have the money.  Said they would give it to me later.  I knew that wasn't going to happen so I said not to trouble themselves and that I didn't mind waiting at their house until they got the money from her mom.  It was nearly midnight when they came back with the money, but I did get paid for my deeply discounted cake.


Once I had a bride whose future MIL was pretty much running the whole show.  The girl was very meek and the MIL had a strong personality.  The bride was getting married on the anniversary of her MIL.  As the MIL was paying for the cake, she ordered two different 3 tiered cakes.  One for the bride and one for the MIL's anniversary so the wedding could also be an anniversary party.  I remember being horrified, but not questioning it as I was basically getting a double order.


After the incident with the check issue, I decided that if it wasn't going to be fun for me, then I didn't want to do it anymore, at least in terms of developing my hobby into a full fledged business.  I just stuck to doing cakes for friends and relatives.  I have no idea how many cakes I've done over the  years, compensated or for free, but since I do it strictly on my own terms now, I get much more enjoyment out of it.


Oh, a word about cutting cakes.  I HATE, HATE, HATE it when people who don't know how to cut cakes properly do a hack job on cakes.  I'm really kind of OCD about it.  If I do a wedding cake and I'm invited to the wedding, I'll be GLAD to cut your cake if there is no professional server there.  In the my office, they all know better than to go near any kind of cake, regardless of who brought it in.  It MUST be cut properly, especially if it is a rectangular cake.  I can cut those almost perfectly into 24 or 35 servings, of nearly identical size.  One time I almost literally threw my body in front of one of the attorneys who wanted to cut her own piece.   Hahaha, no one argues with me because I am usually holding the knife!


I have loved reading every single one of these 161 pages of what not to say to a baker.  It further confirms to me that I am a better administrative assistant than business woman.  Had I been in business for myself, there is no way I would have been able to keep my cool these 30 some years.

jazzy3190 Posted 17 Jan 2014 , 8:15am
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AOnce This lady actually told me she wanted me to just decorate the cake for her idk but I was a bit offended like you have never tried my cake so you want another person to bake you cakes from a box and expect me to decorate she must be crazy what was worst is that she wanted my cousin to bake them I never heard from her again and I'm glad

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