SSCakery541 Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 6:58pm
post #1 of

Hi! I'm dealing with a wedding coordinator who happens to be sister of the bride... she's nice but is telling me all the little details of what she thinks I should do (i.e. chocolate cake should go into certain wrappers, and yellow cake in the other cupcake wrappers) when in my professional opinion I think I should be the one deciding what happens (using both foil and white wrappers for both flavors of cake would look spectacular in my opinion... but who am I... i'm JUST the 'cake lady' as THEY say... smh) ... I'll be the one in the kitchen baking and seeing the product come together and seeing MY design come together - not her! Should I follow her advice, or should I stick to my gut and just do what I do? HELP!!!

17 replies
Paperfishies Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 7:09pm
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I think you should consult with the bride.

vtcake Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 7:11pm
post #3 of

You do whatever the bride tells you to do. I'd check with the bride to see how much power and say the bride has given the planner.

carmijok Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 7:27pm
post #4 of

You give them your professional opinion and advice and then you do what they decide they want to do.

KoryAK Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 7:46pm
post #5 of

Yep. If this is a paid order, you are doing it to their specifications. I often suggest that different flavored cupcakes be differentiated in some way and liners are an easy way to do that. Maybe she is being so specific because they are going to have it printed somewhere blue wrappers are... etc. Don't take it personally.

SSCakery541 Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 7:50pm
post #6 of

Thank you all for you advice!! The only problem I have had is this coordinator keeps trying to talk me down on my price (over and over) and she has told me that if it were up to her sister (the bride) there wouldn't even be a wedding.. but I think I will do as you say, and just go ahead and do it to her specifications icon_smile.gif Thank you!

BakingIrene Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 8:01pm
post #7 of

OK you can stop the nastiness coming at you right now.

Tell the coordinator that your prices are set by factors including minimum wage laws. If she drops the order then thank your lucky stars.

carmijok Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 8:04pm
post #8 of
Quote:
Originally Posted by SSCakery541

Thank you all for you advice!! The only problem I have had is this coordinator keeps trying to talk me down on my price (over and over) and she has told me that if it were up to her sister (the bride) there wouldn't even be a wedding..




Hello! Big red flag here! Don't know how many you are doing, but you'd better get your money at least a week before you turn on your oven!

Bakingangel Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 8:36pm
post #9 of

Do not let anyone make you lower your price. All you have to tell her is that your price for the order is firm.

Do NOT accept payment on delivery. Tell her payment is due 2 weeks before delivery. If they pay by check, take it to their bank to make sure it clears so you are not left high and dry as the saying goes.

Not clear about your post....is it possible the bride might or could call off the wedding?

I'm not getting a good feeling about this one.

Good luck!

ReneeFLL Posted 9 Jul 2012 , 8:59pm

All the advice above is right on.
Do you have a signed contract to cover yourself if they say something different later? The bride or whoever is ordering/paying for the cake needs to sign it. Make sure everything is written out. Flavers, colors, design, sizes, when deposit will be put down and when final payment is due.
From what you posted, it sounds like this could be a major problem down the road.
Also, as the others said do not let them talk you down on the price. Trust me the venue and other vendors involved have their prices set. I can't go into a restaurant and tell them I want my dinner cheaper!

SSCakery541 Posted 10 Jul 2012 , 1:19am

I guess I should have been a little clearer on the bride - the bride wants to get married - she just isn't so stuck on the big wedding thing... and I just got ANOTHER email about the brides sister changing flavors AGAIN!!! UGH!!! Yeah, after the 2nd time of her changing flavors I was set on NOT changing my price!!! Luckily, her mom is a sweetheart and has not problem flipping the bill, but, sheesh, this is getting RIDICULOUS!!! I DID tell her however that payment is due 3 weeks prior to wedding and changes cannot be made at that point (since product will have been purchased at that point). So, if anyone else out there is having problems with this - I HOPE you are learning from MY mistakes!!! icon_biggrin.gif lol
Thank you all for your input!!!

BakingIrene Posted 10 Jul 2012 , 1:33am

Look if the bride or her mother are paying for the wedding cake, then you can refuse to listen to the "coordinator" who is some piece of work...There is an old rule in business "the man who pays the piper calls the tune".

If the order to change flavour does NOT come directly from the bride, then you have the right to say "you XX YY do not personally have a cake contract with me and therefore I will not answer further emails or phone calls". And cc the bride.

I personally would give the bride one chance to get her own ideas down on a contract, if you feel like it.

I would seriously be prepared to refuse the order. You are not being paid enough to be exposed to this kind of harassment.

And don't be surprised when the bride and groom elope.

ellavanilla Posted 12 Jul 2012 , 1:54am

i agree that you should accommodate the desires of your customer, however, i do give my opinion on what works and what doesn't and for me there are some things i won't do.

i won't cover a cake in fondant (that's not the kind of cakes i make)
i won't make a cake in black or red, because it tastes bad and your guests will look like ghouls.
i won't drive a tiered cheesecake into Arizona--that one i learned the hard way. icon_biggrin.gif

i think there's a balance to be struck between artistry and business. the customer is paying, but she is also relying on your expertise. so a tactful artist will convince the customer to follow her advice, no?

SSCakery541 Posted 12 Jul 2012 , 3:32am

True... I suppose I was getting a bit grumpy after the several emails and phonecalls ... I guess I was just starting to think maybe she should just quit telling me how to do my job... but, after all, her mom IS the one who paid... and I am doing things to Her specs, so... It'll be beautiful cause that's all I am willing to do icon_smile.gif

ellavanilla Posted 12 Jul 2012 , 3:43am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SSCakery541

True... I suppose I was getting a bit grumpy after the several emails and phonecalls ... I guess I was just starting to think maybe she should just quit telling me how to do my job... but, after all, her mom IS the one who paid... and I am doing things to Her specs, so... It'll be beautiful cause that's all I am willing to do icon_smile.gif




everyone is guilty of the grumps. sometimes you just wish people would trust you to get on with your work. i get it. my own sister has a list a mile long every time i make a cake for her. it's frustrating and annoying.

SSCakery541 Posted 12 Jul 2012 , 5:31am

I'm glad i'm not the only one guilty of it icon_wink.gif

BakingIrene Posted 12 Jul 2012 , 2:00pm

Well, at some point somebody needs to sit down with that "coordinator" and tell them that demanding lower prices is one of the most offensive things that they could do with vendors.

The mother could tell the "coordinator" that demanding low prices is a good way to sabotage her sister's wedding, and that she should behave to vendors as if they were going to hire her. This might not be something that can wait until after the wedding...

costumeczar Posted 13 Jul 2012 , 12:19am

You're right about the three week limit and no changes after that. Also right is the advice that the bride is the client, not the sister.

What I'm curious about is whether the sister is actually a coordinator or whether she's just "helping" the bride by taking over and alienating the vendors. If she's a wannabe I'd tell the bride that if she keeps it up I'm not dealing with her anymore and all communication will go straight to the bride. I have no doubt that if the sister is being a pain to you then the bride knows how she is. If she's an actual coordinator (which is unlikely based on what you've said) I'd tell her that your client is the bride, and you need all changes from the bride in writing from this point on. I don't know one reputable coordinator who would do any of the crap that you say this chick is doing, so I wouldn't even give her the time of day.

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