nhbaker Posted 18 Mar 2012 , 11:16pm
post #1 of

I apologize in advance for the rant but sometimes people can just be so inconsiderate you just have to tell your story. So here's it is.

I work out of my home (yes, I'm licensed). I've never considered holding tastings anywhere but here but now I'm starting to rethink it. I conduct "tasting days" once a month and book appointments hourly and today was the March tasting day. I have a no children allowed policy because of bad past experiences that range from my husband having to act as a babysitter, to children running around my home unattended (and then going upstairs into my children's bedrooms, etc.). So the other day one of my tasting appointments emails me and says she just read on my website that I don't allow children but she would like to know if I'd make an exception so that she can bring her 3 kids with her and her fiance since they are such an integral part of the wedding and the planning of it and really wants their input as to which flavor they like, etc. I emailed her back and explained that it was a tough call because as a mother I could sympathize but as a business professional, I instilled this policy for valid reasons (which I explained to her). I told her that I would prefer her not bring the children but if it was causing a hardship (they were not local) then I would allow it. She emailed me back and assured me that although he kids were by no means perfect, they were well behaved and she would take appropriate measures (dad taking kids out) if things got crazy. So now onto her appointment today. They show up (late!) and the oldest (who was 9) sits down at the table and annouces that he won't be tasting any cake today as he woke up with the stomach flu. Ugh, seriously???? In addition, the other two were not well behaved and mom had to speak to them several times in order for me to get a sentence out. I did my best to rush them through the details and when things were almost wrapped up the boy holds his belly and looks at me and says, I'm doing my best to hold it in. All I could think was OMG, don't you dare throw up in my house! I sent him out to the car with the dad-to-be and finished the details with mom (the bride) and then ushered her out the door too. I then promptly went and tried to disinfect everything before my next client arrived.

I cannot believe the nerve of some people. I was so upset that she not only took advantage of my good nature by falsing saying that her children were well behaved, but to expose me and my family to a stomach bug was just unacceptable in my opinion.

Again, sorry for the rant, but I really needed to vent!

35 replies
bakencake Posted 18 Mar 2012 , 11:35pm
post #2 of

I know what you are talking about. I stopped throwing parties at my house because of this. I even remember putting -adults only- on invitations and they would still ask if they could bring them. and the people who would ask this are usually the ones with the worst kids. sorry, guess i'm also venting. stick to your rules, you put them there for a reason

step0nmi Posted 18 Mar 2012 , 11:40pm
post #3 of

you bent over slightly...and she tried to see how much you could bend over more icon_wink.gif get my drift! she's going to be like that as a client as well.

brenda549 Posted 18 Mar 2012 , 11:52pm
post #4 of

I have not had this happen. However, since I have my husband take off with my boy during tastings, I would probably respond like this:

"Out of courtesy to my clients, I make arrangements for my child(ren) on tasting days. I expect the same courtesy from my clients."

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Mar 2012 , 11:54pm
post #5 of

I would be just as tiched off as you, but I like to see this as a reminder to all of why we should always stick to our policies.

BlakesCakes Posted 19 Mar 2012 , 1:15am
post #6 of

Wow! Makes you want to show up to her delivery clutching your stomach and complaining that you have had a tummy bug for the LAST WEEK!!!

I'm always amazed at how thoughtless people can be to their own children in cases like this. How awful to have dragged the poor child out when he was feeling so poorly. If he yorked, I hope he did it in their car..........

Years ago, we were invited to a friend's home for dinner when my 2 boys were 5 & 1. When we arrived, and as my kids ran over and began to play with hers, the wife cheerily announced that all 3 of her kids had been sick, really sick, for the last 2 days but that they were feeling much better now.................
WHAT A DOOFUS! Her husband is a freaking DOCTOR!
They both should have known that her kids were still very, very contagious. She should have called and cancelled or given us a choice (we WOULDN'T have gone).
Needless to say, I went home with 2 kids incubating a doozy of an illness that, 2 days later, gave me the pleasure of cleaning up all kinds of bodily fluids for nearly a week.

We NEVER returned the invite and come to think of it, we've never seen them in the last 22 years......Think I hold a grudge much?????? How dare she put my kids thru that!

Rae

Karema Posted 19 Mar 2012 , 2:04am
post #7 of

I would be so annoyed!!! I would not do her cake and I would be booked that day. People can be so rude sometimes and I would have nicely asked her to leave and would not have gone one with the consult. I would have told her that I have children and her child is obviously sick and now she has contaminated my home and to please leave. What an inconsiderate person.

Texas_Rose Posted 19 Mar 2012 , 3:04am
post #8 of

I understand why you're upset and the mother should have kept her sick child at home...but I can't imagine rushing a sick kid out of the house instead of offering to let him use my bathroom.

Curtsmin24 Posted 19 Mar 2012 , 7:21am
post #9 of

I had a friend like that. My daughter was 2 months old and we went to visit her at home. Both her kids had the flu! My husband made an excuse and said we had to leave. I was furious because not only were they sick, they kept trying to touch my baby and she acted like there was nothing wrong with that.

I am so glad he didn't vomit in your home.


@blakescakes , I would have taken the bug back to her house. No I wouldn't have but it would've been funny. I feel for you and that would have been my response too.

bakencake Posted 19 Mar 2012 , 3:03pm

@ BlakesCakes.. 2 year ago I went to a NYE party. One lady, a dentist who was married to an ER DR) showed up. I walked by and heard that she WAS so sick and couldn't get up and the kids ate cereal all day long. I figured I was a while ago. 2 days later I got the flu. I called my friend, the host of the party, and she told me that it must have been that girl who had the flue and still showed up to the party icon_surprised.gif . She was talking about that morning and how she had the flue. why she showed up to a party and infect everyone I don't know. If i'm sick the last thing I would want to do is go out.

Tails Posted 20 Mar 2012 , 9:16am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas_Rose

I understand why you're upset and the mother should have kept her sick child at home...but I can't imagine rushing a sick kid out of the house instead of offering to let him use my bathroom.




And who would clean up the vomit if he missed the toilet??

solascakes Posted 20 Mar 2012 , 1:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas_Rose

I understand why you're upset and the mother should have kept her sick child at home...but I can't imagine rushing a sick kid out of the house instead of offering to let him use my bathroom.







I would totally rush a sick kid out of my house straightaway. If they had no respect for me, I had none for them. I don't even go to my sister's house when her kids are sick,she warns me before hand to stay away.

dinascakes Posted 20 Mar 2012 , 1:18pm

I would've been upset by that also! She was very inconsiderate to you and your family. I hate when people don't think of what they cause to someone else.

I went to a birthday party not too long ago where another guest brought her sick child. I was 7 months pregnant at the time. That night I woke up throwing up non stop from 12 to 7 in the morning. On top of that my daughter got sick too and ws throwing up half the night also!! When I talked to the birthday girl's mom the next day, she told me most of the people at the party got sick that night!! All from one child that was sick, supposedly he had a fever and everything! I don't understand why people take their children out when they are feeling miserable. They have no consideration for their own child or for the people they are about to infect!! I have kept my children home from parties before because of this same reason, even family parties. I would feel so bad if I knew that it was my fault that anyone else got sick because I took my sick child to their party.

UGH!! Some people just don't think!! I feel for you.

cakegrandma Posted 20 Mar 2012 , 1:38pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by brenda549

I have not had this happen. However, since I have my husband take off with my boy during tastings, I would probably respond like this:

"Out of courtesy to my clients, I make arrangements for my child(ren) on tasting days. I expect the same courtesy from my clients."




I love how she put this! Simple yet effective to getting the point across.!
thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif

evelyn

myxstorie Posted 20 Mar 2012 , 2:59pm

UGH I can't believe some people. Especially bringing a sick child to something where FOOD is involved, even if she did only think of it as 'just' a tasting. It's nice that she wanted to include the children in the wedding, but there's no way she didn't know what trouble they'd be. They're HER children, after all.

I just hope she doesn't give you too much trouble as a client!

costumeczar Posted 21 Mar 2012 , 11:51pm

I'd try to figure out a way to meet people somewhere other than your house if you can. I used to have people come to my house, but the kids, and the adults, made it too much of a pain. I had poorly-behaved kids show up, sure, but I've also had grown men get up and start trying to wander around my house. It's not just kids who are poorly behaved!

Even if you have a Panera or a Starbucks near you where you can go, that's a better option. They're totally used to people having business meetings in there, and you can just give them the cake samples to take home with them to eat.

Cakery2012 Posted 22 Mar 2012 , 6:16am

A soultion would be to find another place to meet for a tasting . A community room or small office space in the public. I would never invite strangers into my home . Getting sick isnt the worst that could happen . Not that its a good thing .

Cakery2012 Posted 22 Mar 2012 , 6:27am

I know that some communities have free spaces to use for an hour or two . Usually in community centers ,libraries, schools ,churches they just dont advertise you have to ask .
If you know someone with office space say a realtor/broker for example maybe you could barter for space with cupcakes .

carmijok Posted 22 Mar 2012 , 8:02am

This story reminds me of a person who called the bakery I worked for and wanted to bring her son in to pick out what kind of birthday cake he wanted in a couple of weeks. I said 'fine, as long as you come after 4:30 because we are having a wedding tasting at the moment.' So what does she do? Shows up 10 minutes later with wild child in tow.

The owner of the bakery was with a bride and her fiance and 2 others and the tasting table was smack in the middle of the shop. (it was a custom bakery by appointment only). So I told her that now was not a good time and she said, 'oh we'll be quick,' and proceeds to go sit on the couch and thumb through books while her kid (who's about 5) starts talking real loud and jumping off the couch and poking around things. I went over and thought, well, maybe I can get a quick decision...but no...she proceeds to ask a bunch of questions and her boy is getting louder and banging on things and the tasting party is getting antsy so finally I said, 'you know, I really need to ask if you can come back later after they're through here and then we can talk freely about what you want. Right now your son is being a bit of a distraction.'

Well, I knew I should have never mentioned her kid the minute I said it, but this kid was the worst. Of course Mommy Dearest never sees her darling child doing wrong so she gets all huffy and leaves and then calls the owner later to complain how rude I was and how I threw her and her sweet child out. What she didn't know was that the owner was at the tasting table and had mouthed the words 'thank you' to me after she stormed out. We did not miss her business.

carmijok Posted 22 Mar 2012 , 8:04am

oops

sweettreat101 Posted 22 Mar 2012 , 8:12am

I would honestly be booked that weekend. She will more than likely be a pain in the you know what. I don't deal with these kind of people anymore. And as for the sick child I would have asked her to leave. Let her know that you have other appointments and you cannot afford to have someone get sick. Sorry but her sick child could sit in the car. Have her take him some samples and get his opinion as long as he wasn't in your house infecting your home with his virus.

SoFloGuy Posted 2 Jun 2012 , 6:46pm

Next time stick to your guns and don't allow the kids. Tell them if they can't find a babysitter to stay in the car with the kids and the adults can come in one at a time. People who ask for rules to be broken have no shame and you will regret it in the end. I don't have patience for niceties and would tell the lady to leave and don't dare bring a sick child into my home.

CreativeCakesbyMichelle Posted 2 Jun 2012 , 11:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas_Rose

I understand why you're upset and the mother should have kept her sick child at home...but I can't imagine rushing a sick kid out of the house instead of offering to let him use my bathroom.




A little off subject and maybe it's just me, but if I was sick I'd rather throw up outside than in some stranger's bathroom. Just point me to the bushes icon_lol.gif. And I definitely wouldn't want to clean up some stranger's vomit from my bathroom (I'd much rather hose off the bushes when they leave lol) . Heck, I don't want to clean up my own vomit, let alone anyone else's lol

fcakes Posted 2 Jun 2012 , 11:24pm

So sorry to hear you go through this... I always meet clients at a local coffee shop for tastings. Provides a nice ambiance, and a lot of businesses have business meetings at coffee shops and restaurants... so why can't cake decorators!

SoFloGuy Posted 5 Jun 2012 , 4:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by fcakes

So sorry to hear you go through this... I always meet clients at a local coffee shop for tastings. Provides a nice ambiance, and a lot of businesses have business meetings at coffee shops and restaurants... so why can't cake decorators!




It's up to the coffee shop. If they also sell baked goods you bringing your own food might be a problem. I worked once at a hotel restaurant and they didn't allow a dining customer to sit with a friend in the restaurant who brought in food from a different location. Plus a business meeting wouldn't bring in their own goodies to a coffee shop. But if your coffee shops allows it, more power to you and them.

BakingIrene Posted 5 Jun 2012 , 11:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by carmijok

This story reminds me of a person who called the bakery I worked for and wanted to bring her son in to pick out what kind of birthday cake he wanted in a couple of weeks. I said 'fine, as long as you come after 4:30 because we are having a wedding tasting at the moment.' So what does she do? Shows up 10 minutes later with wild child in tow.

The owner of the bakery was with a bride and her fiance and 2 others and the tasting table was smack in the middle of the shop. (it was a custom bakery by appointment only).




Maybe the owner should train all the staff to say "we have appointments open at 4:30 and 4:45, which would you like?" It takes a real effort to remember to say that each time. I know it sounds hard and distant, but some people really need to be given a professional message without the option for other interpretation.

The mother heard a message that her puny brain couldn't parse into sensible adult behaviour. What she heard was "there's tasting cake on the table right now". She didn't hear the "come after 4:30 " part at all. So she jumps in the car...

Helenw78 Posted 6 Jun 2012 , 11:00am

Wow!!!!
That is highly rude of the mother and father.
I would have been madly disinfecting everything they touched too. Good thing about a stomach bug is they are spread mainly from poor hygiene and aren't airbourne

Chrissythesugarmommy Posted 9 Jun 2012 , 7:52pm

This is one of those situations that people will likely have varied feelings about. There is nothing wrong with how you handled your situation given your preferences. Anyone would have to respect your wishes given it was in your home. However there is also a completely different way to view this as well. Some would say that it is insensitive and hasty to feel that they were rude and to not be more sympathetic to the children. Maybe the child had just came down with something that day for instance. Not everyone is so lucky to have childcare on a dime, and she genuinely wanted to use your services. (Id take that as a compliment, seeing as how there may be other more kid friendly bakers that she could have chosen) But in general, I have found in life it is always best to give people the benefit of the doubt. Assume the best out of people, and children are Gods greatest gifts to us on this earth. Some people would think that kindness and compassion to a sick child would be more important that any broken china, or germs that could be spread. Again, I think there are just several different ways to look at this situation. None of them bad, as noone is wrong for feeling the way they do. Good Luck with your future tastings!

SoFloGuy Posted 9 Jun 2012 , 8:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chrissythesugarmommy

Some people would think that kindness and compassion to a sick child would be more important that any broken china, or germs that could be spread. !




Which is great, but if that child makes the baker sick indirectly because they coughed on a surface the baker later touched like a door handle or a table that becomes a problem. If the baker has a large order due that weekend for a wedding and can't make it because they don't want to spread the germs to 300 wedding guests what do they do?

hieperdepiep Posted 9 Jun 2012 , 9:25pm

I am listening with astonishment. I suppose it is quite a cultural difference. I am not from the USA. I would feel very sorry for the kid, give him a place in my house. Afterwards just wash my hands and do some cleaning.
I have a daytime job (not as a baker) where I meet patients all day. When one is clearly sick, I just wash my hands and go on to the next oppointment. Never became ill, at least less then an average person.

And than: Children are part of my live. They grow up by being part of my live. That is raising a child to me. They celebrate when I celebrate. They would be my number one guest on my guestlist. They would be the first persons (beside my husband) to bring to a tasting. We would all love it and it would be in their memories for long.. Of course I would expect them to behave respectful.

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