step0nmi Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 4:40am
post #1 of

So, my husband and i are turning 30 in a couple of weeks...we are only a week apart. We're having a kind of thrown together party with a bunch of people going out for dinner and then some bowling...nothing huge. But, WE ARE the cake decorators of the bunch icon_lol.gif I wanna have cake, so does my husband. is it wrong to ask people if they are making us something? should we make it ourselves? I really just wanna have good cake, but my husband keeps bringing up the fact that people should be doing stuff for us. well, i know that by now if you want something nice done for yourself you gotta do it yourself icon_redface.gif can't help but feel like it would be weird if we made our own cakes.

what do you guys think?

38 replies
CreativeCakesbyMichelle Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 5:01am
post #2 of

My birthday is in a few weeks and I'm probably going to make my own cake. I don't do have time to make cakes very often right now since I'm in nursing school so it'll give me an excuse to try a new design/technique/flavor/etc. Plus, I know I like how my cakes taste and that way I know I won't end up with a grocery store cake or some other dessert. Well-meaning and loving family members have made me cheesecake and other desserts in the past thinking I'd want something different since I'm the cake maker in the family, which I like cheesecake too (heck I really like any desserts lol) but sometimes you just want a regular ole birthday cake (that tastes awesome of course). If you'd rather make the cake yourself but you're afraid others might plan something else for the party I'd just make sure to mention how excited you are to make the cake for the party. That way you aren't putting anyone on the spot asking if they're getting you anything but you can let them know you're planning to make a cake so you don't end up with an abundance of cakes/desserts that other people bring. Oh, and I'd mention it sooner rather than later before anyone orders anything. Btw, happy early birthday!

AdalynL Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 5:05am
post #3 of

When I had my very first birthday party last year for my 22nd birthday I made it Iron Man themed. I told my friends to bring liquor and made them all a red velvet with pecan icecream cake decorated to look like Iron Man's chestplate. It was for me and for them. No one got weird about it, we ate the heck out of it, and all was well. So if you want something specific for yourself, just go for it. No one will be insulted -- they get some too.

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 5:07am
post #4 of

When looking through the galleries, I have noticed that some of the most fabulous cakes are made for the decorators own birthday. It is done all the time. In my case, I find it slightly depressing... But I generally get crappy cakes, so I have had a friend make mine, and traded birthday cakes with a cc member whose birthday is the same month as mine, who lives within an hour away.

KateLS Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 5:14am
post #5 of

It kind of depends on what you want. I actually LOVE doing my own birthday cake. It gives me allowances to doing something more than I'd usually do and spend more than I usually would. =) (My avatar photo was my 30th birthday cake this year.) (Oh...=) and my husband doesn't mind my getting the kitchen so messy.....since it's my birthday. =) hehehe)

But if you guys don't want to do it, totally ask someone to do something for you. (If you have that kind of relationship.)

I know a few years back, before really getting into decorating, I made my own birthday cake (I wanted to...) and a couple of people who came with my sister in-law thought it was totally wrong that I made it and thought that my husband should have done it for me. Uh......no!

But I guess to each their own.

Tacy09 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 12:31pm
post #6 of

I had my 21st birthday in december, it was nothing huge my family and my boyfriends family went to a "bar" (this is in a town of less than 100 people, and they serve great food as well as have play areas for kids). I made my own cake (the teal, silver and yellow one in my gallery) for several reasons. 1. I could design whatever I wanted 2. if I messed up nobody would need a refund.....and 3. Im a really picky eater (I dont like choclate cake, or friut for example) so it was easier to make my own than give people a list of types of cakes and fillings I wont eat. This also served as another cake to put in the portfolio...which is never bad! icon_smile.gif

elisaber Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 1:11pm
post #7 of

Just have to say, this thread puzzled me a little. Are you saying that in the US it's customary for the guests to bring the birthday cake? In my neck of the woods (Norway) that would be totally unheard of - the host(ess) always provides the cake(s) - if you're invited somewhere, you expect to be fed - I've never been to a party where the guests bring cake. icon_lol.gif Same thing in the work place...if it's your birthday, YOU bring cake. I find it very interesting to see how differently things are done around the world! icon_biggrin.gif

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 1:25pm
post #8 of
Quote:
Originally Posted by elisaber

Just have to say, this thread puzzled me a little. Are you saying that in the US it's customary for the guests to bring the birthday cake? In my neck of the woods (Norway) that would be totally unheard of - the host(ess) always provides the cake(s) - if you're invited somewhere, you expect to be fed - I've never been to a party where the guests bring cake. icon_lol.gif Same thing in the work place...if it's your birthday, YOU bring cake. I find it very interesting to see how differently things are done around the world! icon_biggrin.gif



Funny! I would say that it isn't the guests' responsibility, more the hosts or hostesses. Normally! Basically, you are the guest of honor at your party, not generally the host. I have had a girl order and pay for her own cake, but I consider it a shame when someone orders their own cake. But she made me think she was pretty liberated, she wanted a specific cake, so she bought it! (spent $253, too)

A few years ago, a Pakistani woman from our church ordered her own baby shower cupcakes and I just gave them to her, since it seems a shame to buy your own for your party. I told her they had been paid foricon_wink.gif

Throwing a party for yourself seems like you are asking people for gifts. It isn't custom, same as bridal and baby showers.

elisaber Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 1:42pm
post #9 of
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annabakescakes

Quote:
Originally Posted by elisaber

Just have to say, this thread puzzled me a little. Are you saying that in the US it's customary for the guests to bring the birthday cake? In my neck of the woods (Norway) that would be totally unheard of - the host(ess) always provides the cake(s) - if you're invited somewhere, you expect to be fed - I've never been to a party where the guests bring cake. icon_lol.gif Same thing in the work place...if it's your birthday, YOU bring cake. I find it very interesting to see how differently things are done around the world! icon_biggrin.gif


Funny! I would say that it isn't the guests' responsibility, more the hosts or hostesses. Normally! Basically, you are the guest of honor at your party, not generally the host. I have had a girl order and pay for her own cake, but I consider it a shame when someone orders their own cake. But she made me think she was pretty liberated, she wanted a specific cake, so she bought it! (spent $253, too)

A few years ago, a Pakistani woman from our church ordered her own baby shower cupcakes and I just gave them to her, since it seems a shame to buy your own for your party. I told her they had been paid foricon_wink.gif

Throwing a party for yourself seems like you are asking people for gifts. It isn't custom, same as bridal and baby showers.




I'm sorry to hijack the thread a bit (I'll stop after this icon_redface.gif ) - but this is even more interesting. So in your country it's actually friends/family who throw the birthday parties...for the one who's birthday it is? Same for anniversary parties? And baby/wedding showers? How about kids' birthday parties - do the guests bring the cake then too? And do the parents really come along for the party? Here kids birthday parties are for kids only. Again - our customs are so different icon_smile.gif Here, the birthday girl/boy is the one who throws the party, invites the guests and provides the food and drink. We don't do baby/wedding showers here, and the only exception I know to the way I just described, are batchelor parties, which are thrown by the best man/maid of honor. Wow, I just find the cultural differences so fascinating! icon_biggrin.gif

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 1:53pm

[quote="elisaber"]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annabakescakes

Quote:
Originally Posted by elisaber

Just have to say, this thread puzzled me a little. Are you saying that in the US it's customary for the guests to bring the birthday cake? In my neck of the woods (Norway) that would be totally unheard of - the host(ess) always provides the cake(s) - if you're invited somewhere, you expect to be fed - I've never been to a party where the guests bring cake. icon_lol.gif Same thing in the work place...if it's your birthday, YOU bring cake. I find it very interesting to see how differently things are done around the world! icon_biggrin.gif


Funny! I would say that it isn't the guests' responsibility, more the hosts or hostesses. Normally! Basically, you are the guest of honor at your party, not generally the host. I have had a girl order and pay for her own cake, but I consider it a shame when someone orders their own cake. But she made me think she was pretty liberated, she wanted a specific cake, so she bought it! (spent $253, too)

A few years ago, a Pakistani woman from our church ordered her own baby shower cupcakes and I just gave them to her, since it seems a shame to buy your own for your party. I told her they had been paid foricon_wink.gif

Throwing a party for yourself seems like you are asking people for gifts. It isn't custom, same as bridal and baby showers.




I'm sorry to hijack the thread a bit (I'll stop after this icon_redface.gif ) - but this is even more interesting. So in your country it's actually friends/family who throw the birthday parties...for the one who's birthday it is? Same for anniversary parties? And baby/wedding showers? How about kids' birthday parties - do the guests bring the cake then too? And do the parents really come along for the party? Here kids birthday parties are for kids only. Again - our customs are so different icon_smile.gif Here, the birthday girl/boy is the one who throws the party, invites the guests and provides the food and drink. We don't do baby/wedding showers here, and the only exception I know to the way I just described, are batchelor parties, which are thrown by the best


Generally speaking, yes. Though there are always exceptions, and it may be different other places. I am in Kentucky. At kids birthday parties, either the parents or grandparents, sometimes an aunt or uncle. I have had older cousins order the cake, too.

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 2:44pm

Most adults I know throw their own party. If someone is offered a cake, great, if not, no big deal. I don't think it is a tragedy to make or buy your own cake, I do think it is a tragedy if you EXPECT someone else to do it for you. But to each his' own. There is no right or wrong to this. As a baker, I'll make my own cake, cause if someone gets me a cake, it's going to either be from a) the grocery store or b) from someone who bakes from a box, which is not my preference, so I'll make it myself, so I can also be able to eat it.

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:11pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by QTCakes1

Most adults I know throw their own party. If someone is offered a cake, great, if not, no big deal. I don't think it is a tragedy to make or buy your own cake, I do think it is a tragedy if you EXPECT someone else to do it for you. But to each his' own. There is no right or wrong to this. As a baker, I'll make my own cake, cause if someone gets me a cake, it's going to either be from a) the grocery store or b) from someone who bakes from a box, which is not my preference, so I'll make it myself, so I can also be able to eat it.




Honestly, I think celebrating adult birthdays is weird. It really is no big deal, so if someone does something, it is really sweet, and unexpected. It is just something that rolls around every year, to be dreaded, unless you die, lol. Like a pap smear.

AnnieCahill Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:20pm

Mine is the 26th of next month and I will probably make my own cake. I usually love Costco cakes but seeing how I'm like 1000 lbs I don't need extra cake lying around for me to eat (Costco cakes are HUGE). Plus, I found a new recipe I wanted to try. I don't get all fancy with mine. Just IMBC homestyle iced with some rainbow sprinkles (don't judge) and I'm good. I will also be turning 30.

AnnieCahill Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:22pm

And FYI, I also made my own bridal shower AND wedding cake. So I'm used to that sort of thing. LOL

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:38pm

I made my own wedding cake, and if I do my own birthday cake I leave it in the pan and just ice the top! thumbs_up.gif Lol i will sometimes make brownies or double chocolate chip cookies.

I just turned 32, so I am really not interested... My birthday was last month and I went 3 states away to grandma's house for Christmas anyway. She made me fried pork chops and angel food cake with boiled icing. My 3 older kids iced it. That is an awesome birthday to me! I even got a sweat jacket. I never got gifts growing up. My husband likes to ask me what I want, but I like practical gifts, like a 4 slice toaster one year, and a $20 set of measurimg cups and spoons another year.

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:50pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Annabakescakes

Quote:
Originally Posted by QTCakes1

Most adults I know throw their own party. If someone is offered a cake, great, if not, no big deal. I don't think it is a tragedy to make or buy your own cake, I do think it is a tragedy if you EXPECT someone else to do it for you. But to each his' own. There is no right or wrong to this. As a baker, I'll make my own cake, cause if someone gets me a cake, it's going to either be from a) the grocery store or b) from someone who bakes from a box, which is not my preference, so I'll make it myself, so I can also be able to eat it.



Honestly, I think celebrating adult birthdays is weird. It really is no big deal, so if someone does something, it is really sweet, and unexpected. It is just something that rolls around every year, to be dreaded, unless you die, lol. Like a pap smear.




But the OP is an adult talking about her birthday. So who gets to have birthday parties then? Only kids? My grandma is about to be a 100? That woud be strange to celebrate such an occasion? icon_confused.gif I hope I make it to my 70's, which by the way, we threw a surprise 70th for my FIL, cause he deserved it. Was that strange as well? I threw my daughter a party for when she turned 21. It was a beautiful Japanese theme. My girlfriend rented an AWESOME house in Las Vegas for her 40th and we had a blast! I feel life should be celebrated at any age, if you choose to, and it would hardly be like a pap smear.

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 3:58pm

And for the record I am a big birthday party person. I feel that we should celebrate as much as possible, at any opportunity. Doesn't the day to day of life need an occasionaly break through of celebration? And please don't think I always have a birthday party for myself, cause I don't. I have had 2, when I turned 18 and this past year, where yes, I did make myself a 5-tiered cake. It was a joint luau party with my BFF and the cake was HUGE!!! And I only needed cake for 60. icon_wink.gif That's the advantage of doing your own cake. You can do whatever you want.

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 4:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by QTCakes1

Quote:
Originally Posted by Annabakescakes

Quote:
Originally Posted by QTCakes1

Most adults I know throw their own party. If someone is offered a cake, great, if not, no big deal. I don't think it is a tragedy to make or buy your own cake, I do think it is a tragedy if you EXPECT someone else to do it for you. But to each his' own. There is no right or wrong to this. As a baker, I'll make my own cake, cause if someone gets me a cake, it's going to either be from a) the grocery store or b) from someone who bakes from a box, which is not my preference, so I'll make it myself, so I can also be able to eat it.



Honestly, I think celebrating adult birthdays is weird. It really is no big deal, so if someone does something, it is really sweet, and unexpected. It is just something that rolls around every year, to be dreaded, unless you die, lol. Like a pap smear.



But the OP is an adult talking about her birthday. So who gets to have birthday parties then? Only kids? My grandma is about to be a 100? That woud be strange to celebrate such an occasion? icon_confused.gif I hope I make it to my 70's, which by the way, we threw a surprise 70th for my FIL, cause he deserved it. Was that strange as well? I threw my daughter a party for when she turned 21. It was a beautiful Japanese theme. My girlfriend rented an AWESOME house in Las Vegas for her 40th and we had a blast! I feel life should be celebrated at any age, if you choose to, and it would hardly be like a pap smear.




I think it may have something to do with me having a birthday so close to Christmas, so it has been mostly ignored my whole life, and me being 32. We celebrated my grandmother in laws 90th, but not 91 or 92... Maybe it's milestone birthdays... Or I am weird... I can totally accept that!!!

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 4:12pm

I have a niece who is born on Christmas. I make her a birthday cake and get her a birthday present, as well as a Christmas present. It's only fair to acknowledge her birthday too!

Annabakescakes Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 4:20pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by QTCakes1

I have a niece who is born on Christmas. I make her a birthday cake and get her a birthday present, as well as a Christmas present. It's only fair to acknowledge her birthday too!




That is very considerate. I wish you were my aunt! I don't think most of my family even knows when my birthday is. My mom would sometimes give me 1 thing for both days. My little brothers birthday is in July, and he racked up every year. As an adult, my aunt started giving me a piece of jewelry or a gift card for my birthday, when I am in town for Christmas.

sillywabbitz Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 8:23pm

I would totally make your own birthday cake and if you are the ones planning the get together then you just let everyone know you're bringing a cake and if there is someone else hosting your party, ask them if they mind if you do the cake because there is a new design or technique you want to try. They should be thrilled because it saves the host money. I always want to make my own bday because there is always something new I want to try but rarely do I have time. By the way I am 38 and my mom still throws a bday dinner every year for me (and for my sister) and she decorators like we're 5..balloons, candles , streamers...the whole 9 yards. I LOVE it...I think celebrating your birthday should remind me you of all the fun and love in your life.

QTCakes1 Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 8:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sillywabbitz

By the way I am 38 and my mom still throws a bday dinner every year for me (and for my sister) and she decorators like we're 5..balloons, candles , streamers...the whole 9 yards.

THAT will be ME with my kids!


I LOVE it...I think celebrating your birthday should remind me you of all the fun and love in your life.




Exactly!!! thumbs_up.gif

step0nmi Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 8:55pm

WOW! i had no idea the thread was SOOO INTERESTING! you guys are great!

yes, we are throwing our own party...getting bigger by the minute and I didn't mean it to be that big LOL.

my family is really small...so we always made sure that the birthday person didn't have to do anything on their birthday. and i think this thought occurred to my husband since he has been spoiled by me doing things for his birthday for the past 10 years. his birthday wasn't celebrated much at all when he was a kid...and my family likes to do nice things for each other. if it's a baby shower or something, here, we just find out who's hosting it and see if they are doing something or they get others to chip in to get a cake and/or food.

I find it really interesting that in other countries the person who's birthday it is would bring all the food and cake! not like that's a bad thing, but i guess if YOU want the party you do it right! icon_wink.gif RIGHT!

so, now i'm excited! we kinda had this idea going that we would do a cut out 3 and 0 and make one of the cakes for the other and then bring them with...kinda like a combined cake but make a cake for each other too. I really do just want to have good cake! but i'm even going the route of trying out a new technique too!

you ladies have given me a lot to think about...THANKS!

step0nmi Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 9:00pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by CreativeCakesbyMichelle

My birthday is in a few weeks and I'm probably going to make my own cake. I don't do have time to make cakes very often right now since I'm in nursing school so it'll give me an excuse to try a new design/technique/flavor/etc. Plus, I know I like how my cakes taste and that way I know I won't end up with a grocery store cake or some other dessert. Well-meaning and loving family members have made me cheesecake and other desserts in the past thinking I'd want something different since I'm the cake maker in the family, which I like cheesecake too (heck I really like any desserts lol) but sometimes you just want a regular ole birthday cake (that tastes awesome of course). If you'd rather make the cake yourself but you're afraid others might plan something else for the party I'd just make sure to mention how excited you are to make the cake for the party. That way you aren't putting anyone on the spot asking if they're getting you anything but you can let them know you're planning to make a cake so you don't end up with an abundance of cakes/desserts that other people bring. Oh, and I'd mention it sooner rather than later before anyone orders anything. Btw, happy early birthday!




my birthday is February 2nd...GROUNDHOGS DAY! icon_lol.gif Looks like you're right after me.

actually...here's my birthday story.

I was born on 2/2/82, it was 7:02am, and it was a TUESday icon_wink.gif , it was also 22 degrees outside! my great grandmother called my mom after I was born and told her the temperature because it was so cold. If my lucky number isn't 2...I don't know what is icon_lol.gif just a neat little story i like to tell about myself.

and my husband's birthday is Jan 26th. he doesn't mind not doing something on his actual day...he's so sweet he knows I like all the fuss around my bday icon_redface.gif

CreativeCakesbyMichelle Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 11:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by step0nmi


my birthday is February 2nd...GROUNDHOGS DAY! icon_lol.gif Looks like you're right after me.

actually...here's my birthday story.

I was born on 2/2/82, it was 7:02am, and it was a TUESday icon_wink.gif , it was also 22 degrees outside! my great grandmother called my mom after I was born and told her the temperature because it was so cold. If my lucky number isn't 2...I don't know what is icon_lol.gif just a neat little story i like to tell about myself.

and my husband's birthday is Jan 26th. he doesn't mind not doing something on his actual day...he's so sweet he knows I like all the fuss around my bday icon_redface.gif




I definitely think 2 is your number lol. My birthday is the 6th and I'll be 28. And I have a fraternal twin brother so it's his birthday too. And to make things more interesting his girlfriend's birthday is the exact same date as ours 2/6/84 AND she also has fraternal boy/girl twins icon_eek.gif I found that a bit weird when I was snooping on her facebook page when they first started dating lol.

We'll probably just end up doing a little get together at my parent's house with the family and a few family friends. And my family LOVES cake (no Wilton sized servings for us lol) so they definitely won't mind me making one icon_lol.gif

AnnieCahill Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 11:49pm

February is a big birthday month in my family. My grandfather's birthday is also on the 2nd.

step0nmi Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 11:58pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by CreativeCakesbyMichelle

Quote:
Originally Posted by step0nmi


my birthday is February 2nd...GROUNDHOGS DAY! icon_lol.gif Looks like you're right after me.

actually...here's my birthday story.

I was born on 2/2/82, it was 7:02am, and it was a TUESday icon_wink.gif , it was also 22 degrees outside! my great grandmother called my mom after I was born and told her the temperature because it was so cold. If my lucky number isn't 2...I don't know what is icon_lol.gif just a neat little story i like to tell about myself.

and my husband's birthday is Jan 26th. he doesn't mind not doing something on his actual day...he's so sweet he knows I like all the fuss around my bday icon_redface.gif



I definitely think 2 is your number lol. My birthday is the 6th and I'll be 28. And I have a fraternal twin brother so it's his birthday too. And to make things more interesting his girlfriend's birthday is the exact same date as ours 2/6/84 AND she also has fraternal boy/girl twins icon_eek.gif I found that a bit weird when I was snooping on her facebook page when they first started dating lol.

We'll probably just end up doing a little get together at my parent's house with the family and a few family friends. And my family LOVES cake (no Wilton sized servings for us lol) so they definitely won't mind me making one icon_lol.gif




i ALWAYS find February birthdays to be interesting...but that's AMAZING! very very cool!
my family likes a lot of cake as well icon_biggrin.gif I need to get going on this planning too! lol icon_lol.gif

step0nmi Posted 18 Jan 2012 , 11:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieCahill

February is a big birthday month in my family. My grandfather's birthday is also on the 2nd.




yaaay! happy birthday to your fellow groundhog. I have a family friend that has that same day too...we ALWAYS call each other! icon_rolleyes.gif

AnnieCahill Posted 19 Jan 2012 , 2:16am

I wonder if you guys will see your shadows this year. icon_smile.gif

JWinslow Posted 19 Jan 2012 , 2:53am

This was the first year I made my own Birthday cake. Loved it- I was able to experiment with flavors, fillings & techniques. My family & friends were very glad -no leftovers. I think I'll do my own every year - as my skills develop so will my cake!
http://cakecentral.com/gallery/2159595/happy-birthday-to-me

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