I am co-hosting a baby shower for a girl at church. My co-host and I are going over details (it's still a month away), and I volunteered to make the cake. I have been excited to make this cake for my friend, but today I talked to my co-host and she says she's going to make cupcakes as well. What the heck? We're having a luncheon--if anything, we need more lunch-type items. I can't remember exactly what she said, but her reasoning was something like "well, in case someone feels like a cupcake instead of cake". Um, okay. Does she not trust me? She had said earlier about maybe having more dessert so there'd be enough. I can understand having other things there, like maybe chocolate or cookies, but believe me, I can make a cake to feed 40. I don't think she realized she hurt my feelings, and I don't want to bring it up because I'm afraid she'll think I'm just being dramatic. That and I'm kind of shy. I'm not really opposed to having cupcakes there, but I am afraid she thinks I can't make a big enough cake, or that it won't be cute enough, or something like that. It feels like criticism. Am I over-reacting?

You might be over-reacting, but no one here can really say for sure.

We can all make guesses on why she wants to do cupcakes, but really the only person that knows is her. And the only person that can find out the truth is you.

You can always ask her what flavor cupcakes she is making, so you can do a flavor that is different.

You can mention that you think there needs to be more food than desserts and maybe she'll want to do that instead of cupcakes.

You could opt to do something beside a cake, and then present the MTB with a cake after the birth of her child.

If you want to make a cake, suggested it first, then make a cake. Make the best cake you can make, and don't worry about the co-hostess, her reasons for wanting to make cupcakes or what she even thinks about your cake.

You aren't making your cake for her. You are making it for the MTB.

I agree with Texas. The cake is for the new mom and baby, so forget about the cupcakes and make a great shower cake.

Okay. She already told me she is doing vanilla cupcakes, and i was planning on doing chocolate mudcake, so there won't be a flavor clash. I don't think she meant to offend me; I think in her mind she had an idea for some really cute cupcakes and wanted to contribute them. So I will let it go, and move on to planning shower games and the rest of the menu.

I'm glad to hear it. I think we, people in general, sometimes take things too personally when they aren't meant that way.

Maybe she is as excited about doing cupcakes as you are about the cake. And since there are two different flavors, then really you are both filling a need. Not everyone likes chocolate and not everyone likes vanilla.

Enjoy the rest of the planning and have fun making your cake.

I am in the same boat. My GF just told me that her friend is making cakepops but she still wants me to make a cake if I would. I hope the friens making the pops isn't bummed when I show up with an awesome cake. LOL. Its hard to please everyone. I would say make the cake and figure its also part of the decorations.

People love dessert.. there is always room for more. Enjoy your party.