So I am making a wedding cake as a gift for a dear friend (the groom) The bride did not want a wedding cake, but have the venue serve cheesecake. The groom wanted to have something to save for their anniversary and to cut. We decided on a small 6",8",10" round stacked. I called the venue this week just confirm time to get in. I told them that the cake is just for show. The bride wants it boxed up and taken home (I dont know what her thinking is) The girl I spoke to said "What?" She said I guarantee people will walk and see the cake and when the cheesecake is passed out they will want wedding cake. She then told me if anyone wanted cake she would have the servers cut it and just place next to the table so people can help themselves. Well the bride called in panic because she does not want anyone to have the cake. Seriously??? I really would love to know what she will do with the 8" and 10" layer since they leave on their honeymoon Monday morning. I dont even want to go anymore. So much for being nice and giving them a nice $250 wedding cake. Sorry to vent just really frustrating.
I should also write, I by no means am mad she is not serving the cake but if someone ask to have some is she going to say no? I jsut dont get it, yes its her wedding but the guests come to celebrate with you and it seems she would want them to have a nice time and if they want cake "Let them have cake!"
how weird! that is very generous of you though to offer the cake! hugs! not sure how things will work out, but glad you got to let out some steam here!
If the wedding is not this weekend make 2 tiers faux and the top tier real for their anniversary. There will not be any waste this way. Talk to your friend about this.
Thanks Metria. The wedding is tomorrow, so who knows whats going to happen. I secretly want someone to ask for cake, lol. Is that bad?
I hope some of the guests do ask for cake. She probably won't even know it has been eaten. There will be too much going on.
I hope some of the guests do ask for cake. She probably won't even know it has been eaten. There will be too much going on.
i agree. i remember being a bride (hopefully not a bridezilla) and having a lot of things i had planned on happening get thrown out the door in the whirlwind of the day. keeping my fingers crossed that it'll be a great wedding that was even better with cake!
I agree, I know people who will be there that have had my cake before. She just has me all stressed out now when she called in a tizzy. I am overwhelmed without this wedding. Ugh
Sounds like a real control freak!
Dsilvest. I know we spoke about a faux tiers. They did want some cake so I just left it as I would make real. I think the problem started with the mother of the groom, who is a sweetheart but we all know how mother-in-laws can be. She wanted them to have a big cake and the bride said no. I think she might be just going against her, not serve cake to make her mad. the more I think about it.
I can get that the bride wanted cheesecake for everyone but don't know why she would be so anti-regular cake unless it is because of the MIL. Brides sometimes get a very narrow vision of what their perfect day is supposed to be like not realizing that their guests probably won't appreciate all their thoughtful planning anyways. What about the folks who hate cheesecake (hard to believe they exist but I know some myself) and what about traditionalists who will feel cheated because they didn't get any wedding cake?
Most bakers have been around enough to know how real weddings pan out and what the majority of the guests expect and appreciate, unfortunately most Brides only have that one big wedding and they don't have the broader view that we do. Sometimes it takes a lot for you to just stand back and let the Bride's vision of her perfect day because you know from experience that isn't really how its going to be.
Just bake the cake and let the chips fall where they may, that is the only way that you will be able to save face with your dear friend's new wife. At best- some of it will be served and you will get that warm fuzzy feeling that bakers get when someone is enjoying their art. At worst - some of the guests will be pissed that they didn't get any wedding cake which is not your responsiblity or decision, even if it was a gift. Keep your chin up... and if they tear that wedding cake up anyway, take lots of pics of folks happily scarfing it down!!!
Love it Mamadear! Thanks everyone you just made me feel alot better!
What about people who don't like cheesecake? (If such creatures actually exist ... ) Does she intend them to have nothing? How weird.
You could easily and quietly start a rumbling about "eating the cake" (he-he, snicker, snicker)...then she'll have to serve it.
But seriously, people like cake and if there are any kids there, you can BET they will beg for cake!
Crazy bride. Lets put lobster out on the buffet table but serve hot-dogs instead.
But I understand, a few months back a woman wanted an old fashioned turn table birthday cake from me (the size of a large pizza box) and when I sat down to go over specifics, ie flavor, filling, etc...she said, "Oh, it doesn't matter, we won't be eating it. It's just for show", I said, "You do realize how much I am going to be charging you for this cake you're not going to eat right"? I learned that day that as long as its paid for, what should I care what they do with it. So at least it was a paid order. Yours is not which is a huge difference. We as bakers WANT people to eat our creations, its kinda the point!
Just wanted to give everyone a quick update. The bride still stuck to her guns about not serving cake. They did the cake cutting and the bride took a piece of cake back to the head table and sat there and ate the cake in front of everyone, while everyone else was served cheesecake. I about died. Well after a while they brought italian cookies out to the cake table and people started helping themselves to the cake! I actually went over and boxed the 2 top tiers because they got into the bottom layer I was afraid it would fall over. One of the brides co workers was over by the table getting some cookies to take home and she said I really wish I could have had a piece of cake, thats my favorite part of a wedding, but N------ said I couldnt have any (the bride). I couldnt beleive it. I said well if you want a piece I think you could have some since everyone else helped themselves. So she cut a piece and was eating it on the way out. I really want to email the bride and ask her what her thinking was for not letting anyone have cake. I spoke to some family members on the grooms side and they think she did this just to be a piss pot. I jsut think its funny cause most of the people that did help themselves to the cake were from the brides side.
WOW...that is just crazy! I can picture her stomping her little bridezella feet "NO! I don't want anyone to eat cake at MY wedding!" LOL! Some people are strange.
Well I think its funny that there was a charge on the cake and folks scarfed up the entire bottom tier... ha ha.
I wouldn't email the bride (aka the ANTI-Marie Antoinette) because she has already made a donkey of herself and any reasoning she gives you would just be a half truth anyways as she won't own up to being a piss-pot.
Just be happy that some lucky and insistent wedding goers (aka peasants) got some cake and be tickled cause they are probably talking about "the wonderful cake that got away" and will be talking about Anti-Marie for a while to come.
I am laughing my butt off. (_)(_)
Next time you can decorate cheesecake the same way you would decorate a wedding cake. Kathy Finholt does this. This way the groom has his wedding cake the bride has cheesecake.
The fact that the bride ate the cake in front of everyone is getting me...Wow!!!
LOL - seeing as you made the cake and no one actually paid for it - i would have cut myself a slice . .........
Think i woul have picked up my gift - and walked out when i say the bride eat cake at the head table in front of all the guests.
Thats wedding etiquette for you
Sadly everyone shall remember her wedding - for all the wrong reasons.
I was thinking about the poor groom and MIL. What kind of marriage is that going to be if the bride got into a power struggle over "cake". What's she going to be like over kids, holidays, etc. So sad that people feel the need to be that way
This is an awesome story...I have no doubt that it has more to do with the bride and her groom than anything else. It sounds like there was a battle for control over the cake and you got trapped in the middle. I give the marriage less than fair odds if that's how it started out.
Very good friends of mine did not want a wedding cake. Budget wise they didn't have the funds and her mother was insistant that they have one. When they asked me to do their cake I offered it as a wedding gift because I knew their financial standpoint and I was happy to have the practice (had never done a real wedding before, just wedding cakes for display).
The cake was enormous, and when I called the venue to discuss it they were so rude. Said no one eats cake anymore anyway and I should bring a lot of boxes because it was just going to get packed up anyway.
The cake ended up being 4 tiers and a 5th in the kitchen for extra servings. The couple served a dessert (coffee flavoured pre=packed - not my thing) and the cake was being served later. This "manager" was no where to be seen and her staff were so nice but they were told NOT to cut this cake.
It was getting later and my husband knew how hard I had worked and what a huge job this had been so he went to the staff and insisted the cake be cut before the guests all left.
The staff had some cake, everyone had two or three slices and everyone raved about it. The couple was really thrilled and I had to giggle because this snooty manager said no one eats cake anymore. There was absolutely nothing left and it was the biggest cake I've ever done.
People can be strange and I'm sure if the bride was being hassled by her MIL to serve cake maybe this was her way of standing up to her in some sort of passive agressive way.
So glad some people had some cake and got to enjoy it!
Good for you and your wonderful husband Crystal! I cannot believe that the staff was told not to cut the cake! That is so rude! Did you tell the bride and her mother what the manager said? They definately need to contact the venue to at least tell then that was not appreciated and they will happily let others know! lol Well...that's what I would do anyway! lolol Maybe the manager makes cakes and was just upset that SHE wasn't asked to do it!
I "crashed" a wedding reception this weekend specifically for the cake. - Let me explain. There was a wedding reception at a public building where other activities were being held. After most of the wedding guest had left, the wedding party went around to the other activities to see if anyone would like some cake. We jumped at the chance to get wedding cake.
cakenovice I had a snooty manager too once! I was delivering a cupcake wedding to a local venue, and the manager came out and send, "Yeah can you leave those boxes cause no one will eat this" I was like excuse me? He said no one ever eats cake. I told him well you have never had my cake! I was so upset. A friend of mine was at the wedding and she said everyone was eating the cupcakes. She said they wasnt one left! And I made 200 of them. I wanted to call back the manager and say in your face, lol! Sorry but I cant believe how rude people can be. I agree with others about my orginal post. I dont think this marriage will last very long, its sad to say but I can see the groom being able to put up with this.
Maybe these snooty managers are waiting too late in the evening to cut the cake! Once every one is in drinking and dancing mode, I don't think the idea of eating sweet cake and icing while sitting at a table is going to work.
SO glad that the cake was served and it was the guests who finally helped themselves. Add me to the list of "I hope this marriage lasts" because it did start out on the wrong foot. Keep us posted since the groom is your friend!
P.S. I dislike cheesecake. I would have been drooling over the bride's slice of wedding cake and whining about where is mine?