Angelfire3 Posted 14 May 2011 , 6:03pm
post #1 of

Greetings All,
I'm just venting right now b/c I'm highly irritated. I just made 43 cupcakes for my church's relay for life bake sale. I bought and spent about $30-40 on supplies alone, let alone a lot of time to make these cupcakes for free. That's not the issue.

The issue is just because I donated cupcakes to help a great cause that I strongly support (Both grandmothers have breast cancer), my church is EXPECTING me to donate cakes and cupcakes for their events. I said, "I'll make anything as long as someone help pay for my supplies." Their response was, "We'll talk about it later."

Cake supplies and stuff isn't free and I'm not a grocery store. I'm not going to make cakes and cupcakes for 400 of our members for free. The least they can do is pay for my supplies. I'm not asking them to pay for labor. I just want someone to pay for the supplies. I feel like they are trying to take advantage of me and I'm not going to stand for it. Especially since before everyone knew I could bake they were spending $60-$80 EVERY Month for a birthday cake for our members, then they should be willing to compensate me. This has to come out of my pocket. If they won't pay, then I'm sorry, I'm NOT doing it.

Here are the cupcakes that I donated this morning: http://cakecentral.com/gallery/2034081 Click on the other photos to see how my hubby & I packaged them.

49 replies
artscallion Posted 14 May 2011 , 6:36pm
post #2 of

That's the problem with donations. Once you do it, they always look at you like you're the jackpot, endless supply of free whatever. And they get impertinent if you can't do it, complaining that they always get a donation from you for this event and are counting on it.

I stopped donating cakes a long time ago. Cakes are my business, and too valuable to be a donation item unless they want a bundt cake or a plate of cookies for a bake sale. All my donations now are cash. A $20 or even $50 cash donation, to a cause I believe in, is much more palatable to me (and more in line with what everyone else is donating) than $300 worth of cake. And if it's a cause I have no interest in, I tell them I already have a set list of causes that I donate to, and am not adding to that list right now.

Sangriacupcake Posted 14 May 2011 , 8:30pm
post #3 of

Maybe you're reading something into their request that wasn't intended? People often don't understand the time and expense that goes into baking and decorating cakes....they picture themselves mixing up a single Betty Crocker cake mix and think that's all the effort it takes! Instead of being irritated, try thinking of their request as a true compliment. Stick to your guns if you need them to reimburse you for expenses, but do it in a firm but friendly way. icon_smile.gif

warchild Posted 14 May 2011 , 8:54pm
post #4 of

If you packaged each cupcake like your photos, you need to take the cost of that into consideration also.
I would wait this out. Whomever you talked to at the church about paying for supplies, said we can talk about this later.
If they get back to you and say sorry, they cannot pay for your supplies. You simply say sorry, I cannot afford to do what you are requesting for free.

If you give in and do it for them anyway, you'll be expected to do it on a regular basis.

The ball's in your court...

cakegirl1973 Posted 14 May 2011 , 9:05pm
post #5 of

I totally agree with warchild.

Sangriacupcake Posted 14 May 2011 , 9:16pm
post #6 of

Btw, I think your cupcake packaging is lovely. Where did you get those sweet little boxes?

JessDesserts Posted 14 May 2011 , 9:37pm
post #7 of

I was going to say something similiar to warchilds comment. Shes 100% correct.

If you 'give in' and do what they ask, you'll feel taken advantage of and it just wont sit well with you.

I dont mean to change the subject, but I adore the little bags/boxes you put the cuppies in. Would you mind sharing where you got them? ( crossing my fingers it was on line LOL)

Angelfire3 Posted 14 May 2011 , 9:47pm
post #8 of

Greetings Folks,
I would like to say thank you for taking the time to read and respond to my vent. Thanks for the words of wisdom. Now, time for my secret! I got my white cake boxes & treat bags from......The Dollar Tree! YEP!

Pieceofcakebyrita Posted 15 May 2011 , 5:54pm
post #9 of

I donate when I can to big events. The way I think of it is I get to make a cool big cake that I might not ever get a call from and my big fantastic cake is seem by hundreds of people which gets me more business. Then at least you have a cool photo of a great cake to add to your portfolio! icon_wink.gif

yums Posted 15 May 2011 , 6:17pm

And if you do feel the need or desire to donate, its doesn't have to be on such a grand scale. The boxes were cute but you can cut way back on your supply cost by just giving them cupcakes in a standard liner.

MamaDear Posted 15 May 2011 , 6:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelfire3

Greetings All,
I'm just venting right now b/c I'm highly irritated. I just made 43 cupcakes for my church's relay for life bake sale. I bought and spent about $30-40 on supplies alone, let alone a lot of time to make these cupcakes for free. That's not the issue.

The issue is just because I donated cupcakes to help a great cause that I strongly support (Both grandmothers have breast cancer), my church is EXPECTING me to donate cakes and cupcakes for their events. I said, "I'll make anything as long as someone help pay for my supplies." Their response was, "We'll talk about it later."




The way I read this is that you wanted to donate the Cupcakes for Relay for Life, and in my opinion, that means donating the $ and your time.

The real issue is that now they want you to donate "free cake" for every little charity event that comes along. I would tell them that I didnt mind donating to Relay for Life as it is a family supported charity but I only have that charity on my list each year. Then the next time you are asked to do anything other than Relay for Life, ask for your supply money up front and if it doesn't materialize, then neither will the cakes.

It has been my experience that folks will ask anything of you that they think they can get for free and use "Its all for a good cause", well I bet if you have a bank loan officer in your church, they don't expect him to fork over the dough just cause it is laying around at work.

"Crumbsnatchers are everywhere and they come in all disguises"

MFARAH1020 Posted 15 May 2011 , 6:48pm

Non for profit organizations make money from donations and can also pay for services, do not let them trick you.

CakesHeaven Posted 15 May 2011 , 7:31pm

Okay, here are my two cents....
I think you need to talk to the church and say that you can not offer your product for free but will give them a discount (one that you feel comfortable with). You can offer a % or a $ amount depending on the size of order or on any order. Give them your price list and let them decide what they want. This way, you are offering to help but at what is affordabl to you and you won't feel like your taken for granted. If it is somethng dear to you, than you decide what you will donate.

Bettyviolet101 Posted 15 May 2011 , 8:21pm

If I were asked to donate something I would for sure want to have a happy heart to do so! If you feel taken advantage of you are not going to have a happy heart. If they ask for it for free then for sure just tell them you can't afford it but you would love to put the time in if they buy ingredients. I hope this all turns out well! I couldn't imagine them just expecting you to donate 50 bucks every time they need some sweets. Keep your spirits up! icon_smile.gif

jackmo Posted 15 May 2011 , 8:39pm

angelfire3. I am a pastor's wife and i am telling you, no dont do it unless they buy the ingredients or pay you for the cakes . I was once a pew member of a church and i did cakes for the church . They provided the ingredients though. but i noticed, like you did they would pay someone outside the church but not me. This is wrong to take advantaged of a church member. they should be supporting you. i would voice my complaint as to why i should do it for free. The church got money. they got a petty cash fund or what ever auillary is doing it, can raise the money. Don't let them take advantage of you. they should be ashamed.

LNW Posted 15 May 2011 , 8:40pm

Your cupcakes are awesome and I love the way you packaged them up. They look really cute! I agree with MamaDear and CakesHeaven. If you dont want to do bunch of cupcakes or a cake for every event that comes up then pick one big one the church does and offer to do that every year or whenever they do it. If they want to use you for every event and your okay with that Id give them a few cakes to choose from with a set price and go from there. Thatll make it easier for you and them. If they want something more complicated and specific they pay extra. I used to do something like that with a security company in the city. It worked really well.

jackmo Posted 15 May 2011 , 8:42pm

and as for giving a discount, that is nice, but they don't get a discount when they go to someone else to do it. I believe in doing people right.

leah_s Posted 15 May 2011 , 9:20pm

You've heard the old saying, "No good deed goes unpunished."

kimber59 Posted 15 May 2011 , 9:41pm

I would say to them "okay, I will consider my supplies my tithes and offerings for the next few months!" See how the tune will change then.

mcaulir Posted 15 May 2011 , 9:46pm

Of course the church wants you to donate. That's where they get their money from - members donating money, or time or talents to fundraising. And like a PP said, they're picturing the effort and money that goes into whipping up a box mix or two, plus a little extra, and thinking it's not a big deal.

And it's probably different individuals in the church asking for donations to different events, possibly without realising you've already been asked recently.

So I'd say donate or not as you have the time and desire, and come up with a friendly phrase to use when you decline. And try to think the best of them - it's entirely likely they're not trying to take advantage of you. icon_smile.gif

CanadianCakin Posted 15 May 2011 , 9:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by leah_s

You've heard the old saying, "No good deed goes unpunished."




Just what I was thinking!
I do cakes for my church often I never ask
For any money for them, but you know what!?
most of the time they reimburse me some anyhow.
But I don't expect it.

What Leahs post also brings to mind 'you reap what you sow'!

I look at it as my gift to the church! It's what I can bring,
to make people smile! It's a gift! Not an obligation!


This is just the way I see it! I know not everyone feels the same way!

warchild Posted 15 May 2011 , 11:27pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by CanadianCakin

'you reap what you sow'!


Sorry but that was an uncalled for remark in this situation. 'You reap what you sow' usually refers to doing somthing wrong such as a crime, or not caring about others even if a crisic has occurred.

The OP bought baking supplies with her own money, baked, packaged and donated to a cause close to her heart through her church. The OP has also stated she did not wish to donate free cakes and cupcakes whenever asked, as it would become too costly. She is hoping the church will see fit to reimburse her for the cost of ingredients. I hardly think that donates a 'you reap what you sow' comment.

It's lovely that you bake cakes for your church quite often, and don't consider it an obligation, but not everyone is in the same positition. Baking supplies are costly. If most of those supplies go to donated cakes and cupcakes, it can become a strain on the pocketbook, and quite easily become an unpleasant obligation.

indydebi Posted 15 May 2011 , 11:45pm

My thought is similar to Mamadear ..... YOU pick your charities, not other people.

When I was 16, I had a baby brother die at 3 months old. He never came home from the hospital. Ergo, my charity of choice is the March of Dimes. I always sponsor someone in the walk. I'll happily donate for this organization. And when people tell me THEIR charity would love to have a free cake, I'd let them know "I only donate to the March of Dimes. I can't afford to donate to every charity, so I pick the one that means the most to me." (note: to ME)

It's amazing how people dont' get it and this crosses all lines. My husband does stand up comedy and you'll be AMAZED how many people will just walk up to him and say "Do a joke!" (It doesn't work that way!) That's like walking up to me and saying "make me a cake!" icon_lol.gif

cupcake_cutie Posted 16 May 2011 , 12:21am
Quote:
Originally Posted by warchild

Quote:
Originally Posted by CanadianCakin

'you reap what you sow'!

Sorry but that was an uncalled for remark in this situation. 'You reap what you sow' usually refers to doing somthing wrong such as a crime, or not caring about others even if a crisic has occurred.

The OP bought baking supplies with her own money, baked, packaged and donated to a cause close to her heart through her church. The OP has also stated she did not wish to donate free cakes and cupcakes whenever asked, as it would become too costly. She is hoping the church will see fit to reimburse her for the cost of ingredients. I hardly think that donates a 'you reap what you sow' comment.

It's lovely that you bake cakes for your church quite often, and don't consider it an obligation, but not everyone is in the same positition. Baking supplies are costly. If most of those supplies go to donated cakes and cupcakes, it can become a strain on the pocketbook, and quite easily become an unpleasant obligation.




I think that what CanandianCakin meant, was that if you do good things, good things would come back to you. icon_biggrin.gif I think that this saying or quote could be taken either way, not just for the negative.

warchild Posted 16 May 2011 , 1:13am
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

My thought is similar to Mamadear ..... YOU pick your charities, not other people.

When I was 16, I had a baby brother die at 3 months old. He never came home from the hospital. Ergo, my charity of choice is the March of Dimes. I always sponsor someone in the walk. I'll happily donate for this organization. And when people tell me THEIR charity would love to have a free cake, I'd let them know "I only donate to the March of Dimes. I can't afford to donate to every charity, so I pick the one that means the most to me." (note: to ME)

It's amazing how people dont' get it and this crosses all lines. My husband does stand up comedy and you'll be AMAZED how many people will just walk up to him and say "Do a joke!" (It doesn't work that way!) That's like walking up to me and saying "make me a cake!" icon_lol.gif




I'm the same when it comes to charity of choice. I lost my youngest son to SIDs, my Mother to congestive heart disease and stroke, my father to bone cancer and COPD. These are my charity of choice and I/we cannot afford another. We can only do what we can do with what we have when it comes to donating to charities or causes. If we gave in to all the charities that call for donations, or send never ending mail for donations, we'd not have a penny to our name.

BK13 Posted 16 May 2011 , 12:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

..... YOU pick your charities, not other people.
........ my charity of choice is the March of Dimes. I'll happily donate for this organization. And when people tell me THEIR charity would love to have a free cake, I'd let them know "I only donate to the March of Dimes. I can't afford to donate to every charity, so I pick the one that means the most to ME." (note: to ME)



thumbs_up.gif No need to stress, just say a simple NO if it is not something you are happy doing, and if you must give a further explanation, IndyDebi's example above is perfect. Then walk away knowing that you are doing what is right for YOU.

Angelfire3 Posted 16 May 2011 , 3:56pm

Greetings All,
Thank you so much for all of your replies. I have NOT been getting my email notifications to let me know when folks reply. I really appreciate everyone who understands my position & supports me. I love you all for that icon_smile.gif

For those of you (5 or 6 ) who don't understand my point of view and tried to make me seem like I'm some greedy/selfish person for not wanting to spend all of my time & money on supplies, how about YOU DONATE a cake to 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 etc of your customers or your family/friends/co-workers every time they give you a sob story about not having any money to pay for one of your cakes. After all, "it's a gift and we should give from a happy heart--and No good deed goes unpunished/you reap what you sow." Give me a break! I'm a full time nursing student (who pays out of pocket for a Bachelors of Science Nursing degree), a wife and a mother of 3 all on my husband's income.

Oh, I get it, because I didn't take cake classes/go to school, nor have a bakers license or my own bakery, I don't have a right to make some profit from a gift that God blessed me with. Only those who are "professional" or have their own bakeries should make a profit, right? God gives everyone special gifts & talents--for several reasons 1) to make a living ($$$) off it 2) to bless people who are less fortunate. 3) To introduce Christ to people. I GIVE from my heart every day. I volunteer at my church, I'm a member of two of our ministries, in which I had to pay for my own dance uniforms/supplies. The relay event that I donated my cupcakes too, I found out that they were eating my cupcakes w/out paying for them, whereas, I wanted a purse & they charged me for it!

I bake cakes/cupcakes/cookies for people and charge them only for supplies. In fact I just made 40 cupcakes and a 6x4 round cake (under my pics) for a friend all for $60. So, don't act like I'm some selfish heathen who just wants money.

And I was right, I was asked to not only donate a cake to the church (which I agreed to do a small cake b/c I love my church) but I was also asked to "DONATE" a bridal shower cake and birthday cakes to members as well (which I declined). So, I didn't "misunderstand" what I was asked to do and I have every right to get compensated for my time and the money that I've spent, especially if I'm ASKED to just give it away.

[/b]

MamaDear Posted 16 May 2011 , 5:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelfire3

...God gives everyone special gifts & talents...and
...The relay event that I donated my cupcakes too, I found out that they were eating my cupcakes w/out paying for them, whereas, I wanted a purse & they charged me for it!
[/b]




AngelFire 3 I can totally relate to what you are saying about God giving you a gift AND the part about how everyone expects you to decorate because you can decorate but I have been used and abused so many times that I finally started telling the relatives and friends (who abuse me) in my life that I would be glad to decorate any cake...that they baked...for whatever they needed it for. My cakes are always gifts or done for charity type events and folks can get quite free with their expectations so I find the bake it yourself method is very very effective in reducing these demands.

For the second part of your quote... How dare they STEAL the cupcakes that were donated to relay for life? yeah I said steal cause that is what they did... Guess they are going to have to speak with the BIG MAN for that one.

Just keep your chin up and try not to be discouraged by the crumbsnatchers.

Sangriacupcake Posted 16 May 2011 , 7:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelfire3

So, I didn't "misunderstand" what I was asked to do and I have every right to get compensated for my time and the money that I've spent, especially if I'm ASKED to just give it away.

[/b]




Honestly, I didn't think you were misunderstanding their meaning. I was just hoping that perhaps they meant it in a nice way...that they like your cakes a lot and had no idea how much work and expense went into them! kwim

I get asked to donate cakes, as well, and I often do. But sometimes it's inconvenient, or what they need is too much for me. And sometimes I just don't feel like it!! icon_lol.gif We all have to decide for ourselves what our limits are.

You are a very busy lady and probably pulled in all directions... be sure to take care of yourself. Oh, and I'm totally stealing your idea for those cute boxes from the dollar store. icon_smile.gif

JenFailla Posted 16 May 2011 , 7:26pm
Quote:
Quote:

It's amazing how people dont' get it and this crosses all lines. My husband does stand up comedy and you'll be AMAZED how many people will just walk up to him and say "Do a joke!" (It doesn't work that way!) That's like walking up to me and saying "make me a cake!" icon_lol.gif


[/quote]

That's funny- my hubby is a stand up comedian too- and that is his all time peeve- "tell me a joke"- "make me laugh funny guy". Ugh! icon_smile.gif He's more polite with his responses than I would be icon_smile.gif

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