I Need To Whinge Before My Head Explodes....

Lounge By jules06 Updated 9 Apr 2011 , 5:55am by jules06

jules06 Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 8:40am
post #1 of 14

Apologies in advance for the length of this post but I'm starting to lose sleep over this & need to offload !
My friend K is throwing a huge combined 40 th party with her friend A & asked me to do the cake ( expecting between 200 - 300 people).

For a bit of B/G, both K & her hubby have very well paid jobs, they own 3 properties,go on frequent holidays ,buy $3000 bicycles etc.....they always cry poor while rubbing your nose into how much money they have .Just in the last 2 weeks,K has been to 3 concerts at $150/ticket.

For the party,they have hired a function room, an Eighties Show band, are having cocktail food and a cash bar.K also asked for money instead of gifts because she is going on a cruise .
The cake will be the only dessert.

She wanted a disco ball cake with 2 customised figures,so I quoted for a 6"ball cake on top of a 10" square cake(with a disco floor top) on top of a 14"square ( all baked from scratch mud cakes )...I hadn't been told the final guest total but she said it was less than expected,so the cakes would serve about 172 - I quoted $600 .

I get an email saying that they have only budgeted $150 for the cake icon_eek.gif
"Maybe I could just do a square cake with the 2 figures dancing on a dance floor - whatever they can get for $150,or people won't be eating !!"

icon_mad.giftapedshut.gif

Before I can reply , she sends me another email telling me that now the guest list is over 200 & she can actually throw in another $50 for me ! Could I do the cakes as a number 40,instead ? with a figure on a dance floor on each cake.

I haven't replied to her yet, I can't think of anything that isn't snarky or rude !!

Am I being too precious about this ?

13 replies
emrldsky Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 3:22pm
post #2 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by jules06

Apologies in advance for the length of this post but I'm starting to lose sleep over this & need to offload !
My friend K is throwing a huge combined 40 th party with her friend A & asked me to do the cake ( expecting between 200 - 300 people).

For a bit of B/G, both K & her hubby have very well paid jobs, they own 3 properties,go on frequent holidays ,buy $3000 bicycles etc.....they always cry poor while rubbing your nose into how much money they have .Just in the last 2 weeks,K has been to 3 concerts at $150/ticket.

For the party,they have hired a function room, an Eighties Show band, are having cocktail food and a cash bar.K also asked for money instead of gifts because she is going on a cruise .
The cake will be the only dessert.

She wanted a disco ball cake with 2 customised figures,so I quoted for a 6"ball cake on top of a 10" square cake(with a disco floor top) on top of a 14"square ( all baked from scratch mud cakes )...I hadn't been told the final guest total but she said it was less than expected,so the cakes would serve about 172 - I quoted $600 .

I get an email saying that they have only budgeted $150 for the cake icon_eek.gif
"Maybe I could just do a square cake with the 2 figures dancing on a dance floor - whatever they can get for $150,or people won't be eating !!"

icon_mad.giftapedshut.gif

Before I can reply , she sends me another email telling me that now the guest list is over 200 & she can actually throw in another $50 for me ! Could I do the cakes as a number 40,instead ? with a figure on a dance floor on each cake.

I haven't replied to her yet, I can't think of anything that isn't snarky or rude !!

Am I being too precious about this ?




Your friend sounds like someone who doesn't understand the actual cost of a cake. If she wants cake to feed 200 people, she's not going to get it anywhere for $1/serving, is she?

If her budget is only $200, I would put together a design that actual fits within her budget, but is still your actual price. She won't get her 200 servings, but she'd be within budget.

I think the best response would be, "Oh, I'm sorry! I hadn't realized you had a budget of $x. In that case, what we can do is..."

If you think it's going to be a bigger PITA, just say you can't meet her expectations for that price. *shrug*

I do want to point out that many many people I know who spend like that, really aren't as well-to-do as you might think. Often, they are severely in debt.

I have a cousin who is a millionaire, and we only see him every couple of years. And one side of the family is always like, "Let Bobby pay! He's got money!" and the rest of us are like, "How do you think he got his money? By not giving into freeloaders!" He doesn't spend money like that, so he actually does have money TO spend. icon_wink.gif

I might be put off because they spend spend spend and don't want to spend with me, but at the end of the day, they'll still spend like crazy.

TexasSugar Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 4:08pm
post #3 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by emrldsky

I do want to point out that many many people I know who spend like that, really aren't as well-to-do as you might think. Often, they are severely in debt.




I dito this! Just because they go out and spend alot of money doesn't mean that they really have alot of money.

BUT, either way, it doesn't mean that you don't deserve to get paid what you deserve to get paid. I'd write her back and break the pricing down to serving.

"Honey, you do realise that my per serving price is $3 (or what ever it is) on basic cakes and $5 a serving on scuplted cakes? So for $200 I can only make you a cake that serves around 66 servings. I totally understand if I am out of your budget for the full size cake to feed everyone at your event. I do hope you can find what you need for that price, you may want to try the grocery store."

Kaytecake Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 4:33pm
post #4 of 14

jules06- This does put you in an awkward position. On the one hand, it's great that people want to make their personal celebrations into these grand events. This puts them in the market for a specialty cake and in need of your services. On the other hand, too many people have no clue how much your product is worth, let alone how much work and cost is involved.

I don't know your clients, but K(?) sounds a bit self centered. She may think that $150.00 is very generous. If you show her the costs and labor involved, she may understand your position better.

I don't get this at all. Would this woman take her car to a mechanic and tell him/her that she needs a repair and is only going to pay him $150.00? The mechanic has to charge for parts and labor. Is he or she going to work for free to stay within her budget? Not a chance.

Good luck to you and I hope that you get paid a fair price for your work.

cakesbycathy Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 6:06pm
post #5 of 14

"Dear Cheap-a$$ friend,
A custom cake is very time and labor intensive to create and quality ingredients are costly. If your budget for the cake is $200 then you will have to go to the grocery store. I cannot afford to make cake for that many guests at that price. My prices are $X per serving so cake for 200 people will cost you $xx. I will be happy to give you a 10% discount since we are good friends icon_smile.gif

Sincerely,
Your very offended friend"

indydebi Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 7:42pm
post #6 of 14

Ask your friend how much of a discount she got off of her concert tickets, or did they throw in a seat for free for her?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasSugar

Quote:
Originally Posted by emrldsky

I do want to point out that many many people I know who spend like that, really aren't as well-to-do as you might think. Often, they are severely in debt.



I dito this! Just because they go out and spend alot of money doesn't mean that they really have alot of money.



As an aside, I ditto this. Hubby worked with someone who went on Disney vacations, had designer purses (not knock-offs!) expensive nails, one of the most expensive phones on the market, ate out at lunch every day ...... and whined to hubby about their utiliites that got disconnected and how they were 5 months behind on their mortgage and were facing foreclosure.

But hey! When she's living under a bridge, her nails will look nice and she'll have the prettiest purse in the cardboard village!

But these are the ones who irritate me the most. Not those who actually have the money and choose to be frugal (which is how they got the money, as someone mentioned above), but those who spend everything they have and decide they STILL are entitled to have more of everything they want. those are the ones that I just have no tolerance for

jules06 Posted 31 Mar 2011 , 11:24pm
post #7 of 14

Thankyou all for listening to my whinge !
I understand what you mean about the money thing, K does seem to spend it like it's going out of fashion.
I know that there are a lot of people out there with loads more money than my partner & I , I just don't want my nose rubbed in it !! She has no problem telling me how much they have & what she's spending it on - I just wish she would spend it on cake !!


icon_smile.gif

I have explained to her that large,detailed cakes are costly & labor intensive but it doesn't seem to sink in - a bit like banging my head against a brick wall!!

I need to reply to her today, so I will tell her that I won't be able to do the number 40 cakes ( I don't have the tins anyway ) & a $200 cake won't feed all the guests.

Ursula40 Posted 1 Apr 2011 , 12:18am
post #8 of 14

How much does generic cakes to feed 200 cost? More or less than her budget? If more or less her budget, she should go with those, you do not have to explain your pricing to her

jules06 Posted 1 Apr 2011 , 4:11am
post #9 of 14

You are right Ursula, I shouldn't have to justify my prices to her & I think after her recent email, I might just tell her to go elsewhere ( like Woolies! ) for her cake.

K says - oh, for the good old days - my mum used to just cut the numbers out of a cake icon_eek.gif yeah, I would have to bake 2 fairly large cakes to do that & then spend more time carving the numbers out.

After telling me that the cake was dessert , now it's " just a token" as she really doesn't think alot of the drunk people will eat cake,maybe just the oldies ( no offence ).

* banging head on desk*

Ursula40 Posted 1 Apr 2011 , 4:38am
post #10 of 14

Well if the cake isn't that important, why have cake? And why a decorated one? Woolies cake should do just fine, go and enjoy yourself at the party and be done with it (if you are invited) Normal cake should be enough, tell her to ask the venue, what they would charge for a cake, betcha, it would be more than her "budget"

scp1127 Posted 1 Apr 2011 , 4:57am
post #11 of 14

Stick to your price. I agree with TexasSugar. Tell her that the budget and the amount of servings just aren't anywhere close. Let her tell you what she is going to do. This is one of those cases of, "she who speaks first loses". Don't offer to lower the price. Just let her come up with the solution.

jules06 Posted 1 Apr 2011 , 10:27am
post #12 of 14

I know - why bother with a cake at all ?! She totally changed her story, from needing enough cake to feed everyone, to just a token cake to feed the oldies !! icon_lol.gif

I am invited to the party - it's an 80's fancy-dress theme .

calicopurr Posted 8 Apr 2011 , 5:52am
post #13 of 14

Did you make the cake?

jules06 Posted 9 Apr 2011 , 5:55am
post #14 of 14

The party is in 2 weeks time & I am just doing the 6" disco ball cake with the 2 figures on it....
I really ummmed & ahhhhed about just telling her to buy a cake from Woolies but even though she seriously tapedshut.gif me off at times with her cluelessness , we have been friends for 20 yrs - so I will just slowly & gradually slap some sense into her icon_wink.gificon_smile.gif

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