Menopause Or Depression?

Lounge By diane706 Updated 25 Nov 2010 , 7:19am by Franluvsfrosting

diane706 Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 12:13am
post #1 of 12

This is very personal and can't believe I'm going to share but here goes:
I need to figure it out fast so I know what course of action to take! Just thought I'd get some preliminary opinions from you ladies before I see the doc.
I'm turning 46 in a couple of months and my periods are totally out of whack, I lose a bunch of hair when I shower/comb, forget things constantly and most importantly, I feel sad alot , partly due to my divorce 3 years ago in which my ex left me and my 3 kids with no support (I'm really having a hard time letting it go) and also due to my 17 yr old know-it-all son who is doing poorly in his senior yr of high school among other issues, and to top it all off, I have no business and I'm thinking of closing up shop at the end of the year.
I always thought that I had it all together but now it seems as though everything is falling apart. I know I could probably use some counseling but it cost so much $.
Did you question your sanity when you started going through menopause? Do you think this even sounds like menopause?

11 replies
cakelover25 Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 12:30am
post #2 of 12

I started having very similar symptoms a couple of years ago along with hot flashes at night. When I talked to my doctor, she suggested I take over the counter estroven and it has really helped!

cakecraft Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 12:37am
post #3 of 12


Wow, you have a lot of responsibility, hey? Sounds like you have hit a rough patch for sure icon_sad.gif Hang in there!

My mom experienced many of the same things you describe (including a divorce from my dad, caring for my two grandparents who both battled cancer before passing on, and a demotion at work due to govt cuts....all at the same time. She had major menopausal symptoms as well (the crazy periods, forgetfulness, hot flashes, insomnia etc) But she got through it....and so can you!

I know her doc put her on antidepressants, not because she was diagnosed as having depression, but because it relieved some of the menopausal the two must be related somehow.

Maybe you could start by talking to your family doctor. Some things we just can't conquer on our own. Wishing you all the best icon_smile.gif

-K8memphis Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 1:06am
post #4 of 12

I'm almost 60 so I'm a little ways down the road from you but I am challenged by depression for whatever reasons including chronic pain fatigue, etc.

The best thing I have found is to ride my bike. May sound simple but that kind of outdoor aerobic exercise does amazing amazing things for me. It doesn't solve any problems but it clears out cobwebs and puts a spring in my step/life. I dance to 60's music--y'know at home--stuff like that helps big time. Because of the arthritis I can't get outside & ride in the cooler temperatures now so I have a trainer I ride on once or twice a day--5-10 miles.

I've taken St, John's Wort with good results. But I don't like to depend on it. Therapy is a crap shoot to me. Din help me.

I mean I think menopause & depression is all related--plus the real life issues you are facing. I'd say it's depression and encourage you to try & get 'moving'. Find something like that that works for you. It's life saving.

(((big big (got the t-shirt on) hug)))

Kiddiekakes Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 1:06am
post #5 of 12


I feel your pain..I too am 42 and beginning to go through menopause...Although I am not divorced and left to support kids on my own, I have been down in the dumps and find myself emotional,moody,grumpy at my kids etc...I think I am going to talk to my Dr about getting on some type of hormone replacement therapy.I.m sorry to hear you are down and out.Big Hugs!

diane706 Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 5:26pm
post #6 of 12

Thanks for the advice and hugs you guys. Right back at ya!!

Ruth0209 Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 9:31pm
post #7 of 12

Most women don't actually go through menopause until an average age of 54 or 55. You're probably experiencing perimenopausal symptoms, although the hair loss is probably from stress.

You can have all kinds of perimenopausal symptoms for a good 10 years or more including irregular periods, hot flashes, night sweats, migraines, mood swings, sore breasts, cramps (even if you haven't had them in years), forgetfulness, loss of libido, etc.

I'd recommend that you try some over the counter estrogen like Estroven or the generic equivalent. It can help a lot. Just a tiny bit of exercise really will make you feel better. Try to take a little walk every day. When you can afford to, you should probably see your doctor.

Hang in there! You sound like you have a lot on your plate, but you have to give yourself permission to stop looking back at the life you had and really live in the life you have ahead of you. You may always hate what happened to your marriage, but the only thing you can do at this point is to make your own life. Good luck!!

Jen80 Posted 24 Nov 2010 , 11:50pm
post #8 of 12

I started losing hair about three years ago (I'm 30). So much you could see it at my hairline and people were commenting on it. I didn't know what was wrong with me and it really scared me which made my other symptoms worse. I found out I had Adrenal Fatigue (caused by stress) about 12 months ago. Now that I know what it is and how to manage it my hair has grown back again and my symptoms are much easier to manage. Now my mission to overcome it is to rest and not take things so seriously.

Here's the site that got me thinking and then I had it confirmed after a visit to a health care provider:

Have a look at the list of symptoms further down the page and see if they relate to you.

HTH icon_smile.gif .

diane706 Posted 25 Nov 2010 , 12:31am
post #9 of 12
Originally Posted by Jen80

and not take things so seriously.

Yeah, I get what your saying, unfortunately financial stress (especially when children are involved) and dealing with my older son's issues are pretty serious icon_cry.gif It doesn't help having Christmas right around the corner and wondering if we can even afford a tree, let alone presents to put under it!!

Thanks for the article, Jen. I most definitely have more than a few of the symptoms/causes.
Exercising more makes sense and I'm very curious about both the St. Johns Wort and the Estroven. Thanks again ladies. I really appreciate your help and advice. I know things will eventually get better and that I need to focus on the positive instead of the negative as my dear mom says. Life really IS good and I thank God every day for my kids and everything else! Things could be way worse!

Jen80 Posted 25 Nov 2010 , 1:06am
post #10 of 12

Yeah, easier said than done hey. One year our tree was packaging from Christmas chocolates from the year before. It was the shape of a tree and covered in gold glitter, so it really was quite pretty, but standing at only one foot tall it wasn't really what I had planned on that year icon_rolleyes.gificon_lol.gif .

When mine started, it followed on from multiple miscarriages, difficult births, an intellectually disabled step-daughter, constantly being called to the school office and police station for my step-sons behavior, midnight phone calls from their mother (intoxicated), child maintenance issues, etc etc etc Aaaaarh! icon_cry.gif

There's so many problems that we face that won't just go away, so we have to learn to look at them from a different perspective. It is a looooooong and difficult learning curve, but you'll get there icon_wink.gif .

Franluvsfrosting Posted 25 Nov 2010 , 7:19am
post #11 of 12

You're probably right that it's menopause related but if you're going to see a doctor anyway, ask to have your thyroid levels checked if that hasn't been done recently. The thyroid out of whack can effect all kinds of things and if that's the problem there are remedies. Good luck and I hope you get some answers. icon_smile.gif

Franluvsfrosting Posted 25 Nov 2010 , 7:19am
post #12 of 12

You're probably right that it's menopause related but if you're going to see a doctor anyway, ask to have your thyroid levels checked if that hasn't been done recently. The thyroid out of whack can effect all kinds of things and if that's the problem there are remedies. Good luck and I hope you get some answers. icon_smile.gif

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