Annoyed!!!

Lounge By TheBlonde Updated 31 Aug 2010 , 8:12pm by dldbrou

TheBlonde Posted 29 Aug 2010 , 12:05pm
post #1 of 8

Ok, long story semi-short I have an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We used to be attached at the hip but she sort of went crazy and we stopped talking. Well she's been sending me messages lately saying she's moving to my town and wants to hang out all the time again. SOOOOO not happening. All she does is smoke, drink, and throw up (very anorexic, bulimic) and I have a child and a professional job. Not going through that again. Well this is the message I just got from her (below). ARE YOU KIDDING ME? She's never done a cake before but she thinks she's going to start a business with me? I don't think so...she doesn't even eat and she wants to start a cateering company??? OK, I'm done venting now...just annoys me when people think decorating cake is so easy...plus I really don't like her so it annoys me that much more... icon_smile.gif

HER:
hey since you make all thoes cakes so awsome!!! want to do a side bussniess together, or least im thinking of opening a bakery/catering that i do outta my house...i like i have said dont know were to by the things to try out one of thoes cakes!!, im asuming you already do it on the side...but im seroiusly thinking of starting something like that just because ppl say i should lol aparently i can cook and bake...hahaha hahaha and your exstremly cook at the baking aparently!!!!

ME:
It takes a lot to set up a cake business. First of all you need to get licensed by the state to sell anything. Your house/apartment needs to meet the guideline standards and then they come for an inspection. I have had to buy about $3000 worth of supplies and I don't even have everything I want. It's not easy to start up a business and it's definitely not easy to decorate cakes. I've been doing cakes for 4 years and I still have issues now and then.

7 replies
minicuppie Posted 29 Aug 2010 , 12:53pm
post #2 of 8

Apparently she thinks you guys still have some sort of relationship, so it would be impossible to just avoid her.
IMO it would be best to nip this in the bud and be honest with her (about how you feel). Otherwise you will continue to recieve these types of communications, only then they will be face to face.

TheBlonde Posted 29 Aug 2010 , 2:08pm
post #3 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by minicuppie

Apparently she thinks you guys still have some sort of relationship, so it would be impossible to just avoid her.
IMO it would be best to nip this in the bud and be honest with her (about how you feel). Otherwise you will continue to recieve these types of communications, only then they will be face to face.




I agree. Just a hard thing to do. It's not just me either. She's saying the same things to my two other friends and we all feel the same. The friendships didn't end on good terms but she thinks she can come live here and everything will be the same as it was. Sorry, we have all grown up. We are in our late 20's now and don't have the same lives.

DefyGravity Posted 29 Aug 2010 , 3:05pm
post #4 of 8

My sister in law has an eating disorder, though it isn't as bad as it used to be. She was INCREDIBLY obsessed with food, even though she at like 1000 calories (tops) and was running over 30 miles a week. I think it's just part of the disease.

If you copied and pasted what she wrote, it sounds like she was drunk.

Aside from not wanting to go into business with her, I'd be honest with her as to why you don't want to continue a friendship.

Good luck!

TheBlonde Posted 29 Aug 2010 , 10:24pm
post #5 of 8

Well the thing is, I was anorexic and bulimic too but I got through it...it's not just that though. She's still stuck in the mentality that we are 19 years old...I can't be around that anymore...

But you ladies are right...I need to tell her...just don't know how

7yyrt Posted 30 Aug 2010 , 3:11am
post #6 of 8

Straight.
No beating around the bush.
You no longer want to be involved in that type of lifestyle, and don't want your kids to be around it.
It seems to me if you went through that, being around someone who still does those things can trigger it again. Like drinking and drugs, one just needs to stay away from those who still do.

kansaslaura Posted 30 Aug 2010 , 12:49pm
post #7 of 8

I think she's grasping for what she knew to be stable at one point in her life. If life has taught me anything, you can't fix everything for everyone -- In her present state of mind, she would be so toxic for you, your family, buisness, etc.

Stick to your resolve of not including her, but now and then say a prayer that she sees the needs within herself and seeks the help she needs.

dldbrou Posted 31 Aug 2010 , 8:12pm
post #8 of 8

Tell her that you do not go into business with friends or family. That is your rule and you will not break this rule for personal reasons. You do not have to explain anything. As far as her getting back into your lifestyle, tell her that you have severed ties with anything that had to do with your behavior from your past. You do not want to relive your past and do not want your family to suffer if you should fall back into your old patterns. No matter if she says she has changed, tell her that she is a constant reminder of your past and do not want to go back in time. Good Luck, It seems like she needs to hang on to her past because her present life is not fulfilling her needs.

Quote by @%username% on %date%

%body%