I Am In Shock....

Baking By cakedivamommy Updated 23 Mar 2010 , 6:54pm by scociny

cakedivamommy Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:15am
post #1 of 24

I know this varies by area but for 2 batches of the modified NFSC and 2 batches of MFF how much does it cost YOU to make it?

I had agreed to make some cookies for my sister for an event she is doing. I assumed (silly of me) it would be the same deal as last year, she would pay me for ingredients. She is my sister so I was not going to charge her for anything else. Upon talking to her tonight she informs me that she is not going to pay for the ingredients to make the cookies but instead give me a tax write off slip personally written by her. I can not assume this would even fly with the govn't! The cookies would be individually bagged with a ribbon on each. I dont have the $$ to shell out for these cookies and honestly dont know if I have the time (have 2 very small children at home). How do I nicely tell her its a no go without royally pissing her and in turn my mother?

Please help!

23 replies
CAKE_NEWBIE Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:30am
post #2 of 24

I would just tell her flat at no. You should be the one pissed off not her. She is basically asking you t make cookies for HER event and use YOUR money. Then offers to give you a HANDWRITTEN tax write off note, is she serious? I didn't know the IRS excepted hand written write offs. wow just wow

Kitagrl Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:32am
post #3 of 24

Oh brother. What a mooch.

elliebuff Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:37am
post #4 of 24

"I really can't afford the time or the materials right now, sorry."

Ruth0209 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:41am
post #5 of 24

Just tell her you can't do it. Who cares if she's mad? If you do it, you'll be mad. Why is that more acceptable? Not being able to afford something is a perfectly acceptable reason for not doing it. If she can't understand that, she needs to grow up.

katnmouse Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:44am
post #6 of 24

"Hey sis, instead of giving me a handwitten tax write off, you can just give the grocery store a handwritten IOU for the cost of the ingredients!! Think that will work for them???"

CeeTee Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:44am
post #7 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by elliebuff

"I really can't afford the time or the materials right now, sorry."




This.

Not all 'events' qualify as tax write offs. If you Sis and Mom get pissed that you can't afford to cater to her needs, then the problem is theirs, not yours.

luv2bake6 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:48am
post #8 of 24

How rude! Just say that you are swamped with paying orders and cannot get to do what she wants. That's a pretty good blowoff.

djs328 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:55am
post #9 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2bake6

How rude! Just say that you are swamped with paying orders and cannot get to do what she wants. That's a pretty good blowoff.




YEP. Money talks, and with two little ones running around, your time is VALUABLE!!!! It will stink, but I'd tell her you just can't do it this time. icon_rolleyes.gif

nwnest Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 1:57am
post #10 of 24

Tell your sister soon, though. You have an honest and valid reason for not doing it, but she needs to have time to make other arrangements.

Also, get in touch with your mom, too. Make it a "Hello, how are you?" call/email, but add the "by the way" and tell her your sister asked you to make the cookies and you don't have the time or money.

psmith Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:00am
post #11 of 24

No way! thumbsdown.gif Don't even feel at all bad about telling her a big fat NO! That is the just about the craziest thing I've ever heard!

luv2bake6 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:02am
post #12 of 24

Family is so overrated sometimes, huh?

BeanCountingBaker Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:03am
post #13 of 24

I'm an accountant by day and a baker by night (and weekend). Unless your sister works for a legally recognized non-for-profit organization a tax donation receipt is worthless, hand written or otherwise. A donation receipt is acceptible for a non-cash transaction, but should not be substituted for payment.

newmansmom2004 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:08am
post #14 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth0209

Just tell her you can't do it. Who cares if she's mad? If you do it, you'll be mad. Why is that more acceptable? Not being able to afford something is a perfectly acceptable reason for not doing it. If she can't understand that, she needs to grow up.




^ What Ruth said!

If you do it this time she'll continue to use you for every little "event" SHE signs up for. She's being unreasonable and unfair by pushing HER responsibilities off onto you...and then expecting you to foot the bill.

Mrs-A Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:22am
post #15 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeanCountingBaker

I'm an accountant by day and a baker by night (and weekend). Unless your sister works for a legally recognized non-for-profit organization a tax donation receipt is worthless, hand written or otherwise. A donation receipt is acceptible for a non-cash transaction, but should not be substituted for payment.




this is what im thinking - although aussie & US are different but quite simply, joe blow public can write out a tax receipt for all they want but unless its legally recongnized by the organisation/busineess/charity then you might as well use it as toilet paper

plus for me down here, i can only claim work related expenses, meaning if im claiming for the goods then someone in the tax office might check up to see if i was reporting my income from baking as well

i would be honest with your sister and tell her to book someone else

mamawrobin Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:23am
post #16 of 24

I would tell her the truth. I can't afford to make them and I don't have the time. Tell her NOW so that she has time to make other arrangements. AND call your mother immediately after speaking to your sister. That way everyone is on the same page. I honestly cannot believe that she expects you to pay for the ingredients and do all the work for nothing.

You have to stand up for yourself or this is going to happen again and again. If your sister gets mad she just does. She will get over it icon_lol.gif I've always said "if someone has to be upset it might as well be the other person...not me". icon_wink.gif

Ruth0209 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:32am
post #17 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2bake6

How rude! Just say that you are swamped with paying orders and cannot get to do what she wants. That's a pretty good blowoff.




Actually, it isn't a good blow off. You should just be honest with her and say you are not willing to foot the bill for the cookies, and you don't think it's fair of her to ask you to do it.

I don't know why people always think they need an angle instead of just speaking the truth and letting people deal with it like grown-ups.

cownsj Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:42am
post #18 of 24

First of all, assuming the gov't. accepts the tax write-off, you won't get any money as a result. You'd have to itemize your taxes and have a total over a certain amount, and then it's just that it will lower your tax tier, so maybe, just maybe, you could realize (providing you met all the other terms), a dollar or two off your taxes. woooo hoooooo what a deal for you.... NOT! Tell your sister point blank that just as she can't afford to pay for the ingredients, you can't afford to pay for them either. You were happy to donate the cost of your labor, which by the way would be equal to...... $X. You would be more than happy to help her again if you could, but you simply can't. But to please let you know asap if her situation changes. Then tell your mother how you simply cannot afford to pay out for someone else's ingredients and tell her too how much you are saving your sister by not charging her for your labor, electric, oven, etc. Remind both of them too how NONE of this is your responsibility and that you were giving as much as you could by giving your time and labor, but cash is another story.

I love how those who want the freebie are also the ones who try to put the guilty trip on you and make it out that you are doing something wrong. You aren't. Take care of yourself first. And if you want, have your sister call me, and I'll straighten her out.

cownsj Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:44am
post #19 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth0209

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2bake6

How rude! Just say that you are swamped with paying orders and cannot get to do what she wants. That's a pretty good blowoff.



Actually, it isn't a good blow off. You should just be honest with her and say you are not willing to foot the bill for the cookies, and you don't think it's fair of her to ask you to do it.

I don't know why people always think they need an angle instead of just speaking the truth and letting people deal with it like grown-ups.




Ok, here's my short answer then. In dealing with it from this angle, then just simply tell her to put on her big girl panties and deal with it! (I'm just, well mostly, kidding because I don't think it's something you would say to her, but hey, it does fit.)

ChRiStY_71 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:52am
post #20 of 24

If you don't put your foot down now, you'll find yourself in this same situation again. Nip it in the bud! thumbs_up.gif

Bfisher2 Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 2:54am
post #21 of 24

*LOL*.... Dear Auditor,

My sister donated some cookies to me! REALLY!
And they were great!

*LOL*... a simple... no is all that is needed. She will get over it!

pastryjen Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 3:14am
post #22 of 24

Family...too bad you don't get to pick 'em!

dldbrou Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 3:26am
post #23 of 24

Ask her which meals your children should miss in order to pay for the ingredients for her cookies.

Let her know that you appreciate her asking you to make the cookies, but you can not take your grocery money away from your children in order to make her cookies.

scociny Posted 23 Mar 2010 , 6:54pm
post #24 of 24

I agree with the others. Tell her when you originally agreed, you thought it would be the same arrangement as last year and you simply cannot afford to shell out the money for her function.

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