Getting The Pediatrician To Take Me Seriously

Lounge By Texas_Rose Updated 20 Jul 2009 , 3:19pm by indydebi

Texas_Rose Posted 17 Jul 2009 , 7:29am
post #1 of 21

It's almost time for my daughter's checkup. Sophia is about to turn 4 and she's 35 inches tall. For more than two years she's been below the 3rd percentile in height...but our doctor doesn't think it's cause for concern. First he said they must have measured her wrong before, then last year he said that it was common for kids to "lose" an inch of height when they started measuring them standing up. He was a little concerned because she had such a big head but then he measured my head and said I had the biggest head he'd ever seen on a woman icon_redface.gif Sophia has a long trunk and short limbs and really well defined muscles. By comparison, my older daughter was 42 inches tall when she turned 4.

I like our doctor. He's a really smart man. His office is a 10 minute walk from our house, and whenever I call with a sick kid, he sees them the same day. So I don't want to switch doctors, but I feel like I'll have to if he doesn't take Sophia's height issue seriously. How can I persuade him that she needs some testing?

(By the way, I'm fine with her being short, but there are some issues that make me worry, for example she has trouble reaching to wipe because of her long trunk and short arms. She also knows she's smaller than other kids her age and she's sensitive about it. People mistake her for a baby all the time too and it upsets her.)

20 replies
Auryn Posted 17 Jul 2009 , 12:47pm
post #2 of 21

How is she doing nutritionally??
Is her mental and coordination development up to par??

If everything else is fine I would sit down and explain to Sophia that everybody is different, and that being different is a good thing, how boring would it be otherwise.

Can you go to another pediatrician to get another opinion without 'switching'??
he sounds like a great doctor that cares.

It kinda seems like a lot of your 'issues' with it is her being upset by the other kids calling her a baby

brincess_b Posted 17 Jul 2009 , 2:16pm
post #3 of 21

im afraid i dont know much bout stuff like this, but it is horrible when you dont feel your dr is taking you seriously, and you dont feel reassured.

since he sounds like a nice guy, you maybe just have to say you know he isnt worried, but you are, you just need a bit more info and reassurance. he might not 'get' that you are really worried, its not just a passing concern.

i imagine you could investigate what short stature can signify online so that you can ask to be reassured specifically about XYZ or ask for tests, but you might be opening something like pandoras box - like freaking out over cancer or whatever, when really, shes just destined to be small!

in the uk, we can see any dr at the practice, or any nurse, and usually, its nurses that keep track of kids development. guess things are different though!

i have always been small, smallest in my years at school and uni, smallest at work. like the other poster said, teach her that everyone is different and special, that she needs to ignore (or report) kids that make fun of her. the best things come in small packages is what i was always told!

summernoelle Posted 17 Jul 2009 , 3:33pm
post #4 of 21

If she is normal in all other areas, that is prob. why he is not concerned. But, it never hurts to get a second opinion. You could try taking her to a new doctor for her checkup.

Good luck! I'm sure she's fine, that her body is just growing at a different rate. icon_smile.gif

funcakes Posted 17 Jul 2009 , 8:37pm
post #5 of 21

If I were you I would tell him how concerned I was about her height and body structure. Insist that he/she give you a referral to an endocrinologist. Hopefully it will be in a good medical center. This is the only way you can rest your mind about this.
My granddaughter is very tiny. Her mom, and both grandmothers are under 5 feet tall. My son is short too. They still are taking her to an endocrinologist just to make sure they are doing what they should for her.
People do not treat her like a baby, but one day when she was sitting on my lap some other girls came up and asked if she was a real person or a doll.

Texas_Rose Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 12:57am
post #6 of 21
Originally Posted by Auryn

How is she doing nutritionally??
Is her mental and coordination development up to par??

If everything else is fine I would sit down and explain to Sophia that everybody is different, and that being different is a good thing, how boring would it be otherwise.

Can you go to another pediatrician to get another opinion without 'switching'??
he sounds like a great doctor that cares.

It kinda seems like a lot of your 'issues' with it is her being upset by the other kids calling her a baby

She has a good appetite, and is very smart, much more vocal than her sister at that age (uses such big words that people are always surprised), has pretty good coordination. She used to fall down a lot because of her big head but now that she's gained weight she's a little more balanced.

It's not really about other kids calling her a baby...if she's got a problem that could be treated (like a growth hormone deficiency) then I feel like it's my responsiblity to get her treated. If she's just the way she's supposed to be then testing would show that and I would be able to quit worrying.

FullMoonRanch Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 1:52am
post #7 of 21

Is there another doctor in the practice you can see? If not maybe you could take her to a different one for a second opinion. The peace of mind for you would be worth it as well as finding out/ ruling out any problems. The Dr. ran all sorts of tests on my youngest when she 'fell below' the curve. It made me feel better to know she is just little (like my mom-in-law!). It can be hard to press the issue with the doctor because they are supposed to 'know it all'. But you are Mom and you know your child better than they do. Keep us posted! We are thinking of you.

BeeBoos-8599_ Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 2:57am
post #8 of 21

Texas, I swear you and I have paralell lives lol. Anyway, Long trunk, short muscular limbs and a larger head CAN be related to certain forms of dwarfism. NO I AM NOT SAYING SHE IS A DWARF I just think you should do some research and get a 2nd opinion. I totally love my pediatrician and the main reason why is that he ALLWAYS gives my conserns total afirmation. He listens and makes sure that I trust my gut when it comes to my girls. Trust yourself and seek another opinon. I also find it conserning that a pediatrician would allways be able to gt you in on short notice. Maybe there are reasons he has opennings. Just a thought.

-Tubbs Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 3:20am
post #9 of 21

Definitely agree with pp here. Follow your instincts and take her somewhere else for a second opinion. From what you say, it sounds like your concerns are more than just about her being tiny, but that she is possibly out of proportion, which can (only can) be an indicator of other issues.

She sounds spot-on in every other way, so try not to worry too much. Good luck!

s_barnes76 Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 4:56am
post #10 of 21

I would definitely go for a 2nd opinion. When my son was born, his left hip was underdeveloped. Our pediatrician never diagnosed it. It wasn't until after we switched to a family practice Dr. that we found out. He spent the next 3 months in a cast to correct the problem. Luckily, he was a baby when it was discovered. If he had been a little older, he would've been in a wheelchair. Sometimes it pays to get another opinion. HTH

Jen80 Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 12:04pm
post #11 of 21

Worrying about your kids is the worst feeling in the world. I think you should get a second opinion just to put YOUR mind at ease. Does your doctor need to know if you've gone somewhere else? I don't know how the medical system works over there.

Texas_Rose Posted 18 Jul 2009 , 4:51pm
post #12 of 21

The way that our insurance works is that we'd have to switch her PCP to take her to another pediatrician. Our doc is a solo practice. I've had to change doctors oldest needed surgery and I knew what was wrong but the doctor didn't believe me. that time, we changed doctors, got the referral and Valerie had her operation within a week of seeing the surgeon. That's actually when we started going to this doctor.

Bee-Boos, one of my neighbors who is a nurse suggested when Sophia was a baby that she might have some kind of hearing it mentioned isn't a total shock.

I feel a little bad...Sophia is my last baby, I can't have any more...and I've been really happy that she was staying baby size for so long.

itsmylife Posted 19 Jul 2009 , 3:58am
post #13 of 21

Since you really like the pediatrician..why not just say 'I know you've told me not to worry about this for the last two years, but I'm still concerned. Is there some type of specific test that can be done so that I can put my mind at ease?'

Like you said... if there is anything in the world that can be done to help her, if she needs it, you need to know.

I always wondered why my parents worried about me so much until I became a parent.

Rebealuvsweets Posted 19 Jul 2009 , 4:47am
post #14 of 21

I would say like the others to get a 2nd opinion. It is always better to be on the safe side. My grandaughter was very, very small for along time. Everyone would comment on how small she was for her age. The doctor's would say that she was under the height chart where she should be at her age. She was always the shortest one in her class. I am very small and my daughter and my mother are very small. But now at ten years old she is starting to grow. She may be just slow in growing, but just get another opinion to ease your mind. Hope all works out....

mcaulir Posted 19 Jul 2009 , 8:41am
post #15 of 21

Like someone said earlier, maybe you could do some research so you know specifically what you would like her tested for.

You should definitely keep pushing , if only to set your mind at ease.

I am 6ft 1, and at age 5, my doctor wanted to put me on the contraceptive pill to stop me growing. Thank goodness for my Mum, who wouldn't let him - many girls who did have this treatment are having lots of health problems as adults.

My point is that you should get all the info you can, and push until you're satisfied.

I've read lots of your posts recently, and I think you might be one of the nicest people ever, so don't feel bad about enjoying your youngest daughter's baby size. I'm positive that you would be doing everything in her best interest.

xstitcher Posted 19 Jul 2009 , 10:14am
post #16 of 21

Hi Texas Rose,

I think I recall reading a post quite a while back where you were somewhat concerned about your daughter's height. I really think for your own peace of mind that you either get your dd's doctor to listen to your concerns and respond to them or you find yourself a new dr. for your dd.

I did a search with the following the information you provided (child has a large head, long trunk, short limbs and really well defined muscles)
and these are the first couple of links that came up (I'm not saying in any way that this might be the problem with your dd height but just wanted you to have the links available and see if they applied at all or if you could rule them out) For all we know your dd might end up surprising you and grow to be tall anyway or on the other hand be a petite and beautiful icon_smile.gif :

I would definitely urge you to go back to your family doctor and let him know that this is just not a mild concern you have, let him know that you have been worried about this for the past couple of years and you'd really like him to look into your concern further and do testing if there are any available. If he can't or won't do this for you please go see someone else so you can put your worries to rest. Remember, dr.'s are still only human and can make mistakes.

Hope you can get to the bottom of this soon.

ElectricCook Posted 20 Jul 2009 , 10:43am
post #17 of 21

Good Morning,

I would look up the doctor that I want to see and TELL the peditrician that I WANT A REFFERAL TO THAT DOCTOR. You do not need to ask for permission to have peace of mind. You have medical insurance for a reason. This is your child and you are in charge of her welfare. Remember tell the doctor this is want, you do not need to ask.

You are the mother and you will rack yourself with guilt if you don't do anything right away.

My son had speech issues at the age of 3 and I let my family and old peditrician talk me out of gettng help. At the age of 4 it was obvious that he needed speech therapy and guess who was feeling guilty because she didn't listen to her instincts. My son also had issues with his head when he was born and I addressed that issue head on and it wasn't anything to be concerned with. I did take him to see 3 neurologists to ease my concerns. I did however let myself be talked into my son not having any speech issues, I still regret not listening to myself. My son is 9 and still receives speech therapy.

I know that this is long but I wanted to give you a little background and tell you to follow your instincts.

Just my two cents.

jaybug Posted 20 Jul 2009 , 11:39am
post #18 of 21

You definetly need to go with your gut instinct and get that second opinion. Get testing done so you can lay down at night knowing you gave it your all. Who knows, maybe she is lacking some growth hormone, maybe she's just meant to be short. You will feel better in the long run! Good luck hon and keep us posted! thumbs_up.gif

mixinvixen Posted 20 Jul 2009 , 1:36pm
post #19 of 21

at the age of 15 months, my daughter was speaking her own version of language but not one i could understand. each time she went for a well baby visit, i would mention her speech, the doctor would say it was normal and put me off for another 3-6 months. this is a doctor who was great with her, heated his stethoscope before putting it on her chest, played with her, etc...we really liked him...but it still didn't sit well with me, especially when she was around other kids and i could see the definite delay.

at her 18 month visit, he said she should be saying anywhere from around 25 words by then...she was at about 8-10. he insisted we wait another 6 months. at her 2 year well baby visit, she was still at around 10, and she was supposed to be saying around 100 words!!!! i was furious that he hadn't bothered to listen to me, and insisted on a speech program. now here we are, 3 years later, she's getting ready to start school next month and she says words like "delectable!"

GO WITH YOUR GUT! be polite but firm, saying that you want a specialist to see her, if for nothing else than to confirm his diagnosis of "normal". YOU HAVE THIS RIGHT!

umgrzfn Posted 20 Jul 2009 , 2:29pm
post #20 of 21

Coming from a nurse, you should feel comfortable with what your dr. is telling you. IF YOU DON"T, he should not be offended for you to ask for a second opinion!!!!! Dr's go to school for a reason, it is part of their job to make sure the parents understand what is going on (IN LAYMANS TERMS)!!!!!!!!!! If they don't, they are not fulfilling their oath!! If you don't follow your heart, you might regret it later on! We can't live on "I wish I would have......" or "What if.....". Our children depend on us to do what is best for them. If you think she might have a deficiency, it would be better to catch it sooner then later! FOLLOW YOUR HEART TEXAS!!!!!

indydebi Posted 20 Jul 2009 , 3:19pm
post #21 of 21

Definitely get 2nd opinion. My sister's son had strep and ear infections ALL THE TIME. Doctor kept saying he'd grow out of it. She finally told him, "I am not willing to allow my son to be this sick ALL THE TIME!" She went to another doctor, got his tonsils and adnoids taken out and son was fine after that.

Turns out the reason her son chewed with his mouth open was because his tonsils and adnoids were so bad and so huge that he couldn't eat and breath at the same time! She felt guilty for reprimanding him for table manners when the poor little kid couldn't breath!

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