How Do I Deal With Insults And Negativity?

Lounge By Amymnn Updated 17 Jul 2009 , 11:32pm by Rylan

Amymnn Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 7:38pm
post #1 of 55

Posting here in the How do I? forum regarding one way to deal with offensive remarks or insulting posts.


I've noticed some things in posting here.
A community of CC'ers are like most anywhere.
Some are kind, compassionate and giving,
some are here finding out how to do this for a living.
Some post with constructive criticism and advice
Others post with a chip on their shoulder, and not very nice.

Some people are here to find both mentors and friends.
Some are here for less obvious reasons, and often offend.
I don't think it's an intentional normality -
I think their post is a reflection of personality.
Some are aggressive and do not think twice about words
Could care less if they offend, or even sometimes - hurt.

So next time you're offended by a post in this community,
realize that being nice or kind doesn't offer any immunity,
from people who will insult you with either indifference or intent
with the negativity in the post they sent and truly meant!

Better to take the energy you could spend on their two cents
or their apathy in response when you explain their offense
and put it into something productive instead
Watch a how-to video or read a positive thread.

Even when one disagrees, they have two ways of expression
one through constructive criticism, one through insulting aggression
At the end of the day, who would you trust and admire?
Obviously the person who can be both honest AND inspire!

Therefore, do realize that posting in kindness and respect
can inspire and help others as they learn from you what to expect
soon they connect your name with someone of admiration
someone with strong character and a kind reputation.

So don't be disillusioned by personalities that aggress
Just keep on seeking those who are positive in what they express
And most importantly, for the kindness they give in what they say and do
pass that kindness on to others, who may seek guidance from you!

-Amy

54 replies
Loucinda Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 7:53pm
post #2 of 55

Amy - that is without a doubt one of the most meaningful posts I have ever read on here. Thank you for posting it. I have copied and pasted it for my own use (I hope you don't mind) as reference when I feel I need it.

Well said.

in2cakes2 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:36pm
post #3 of 55

Thank you, this is very well said! Sometimes I am afraid to post for some of those very reasons and often feel sorry for some of the posters who seem to want an honest opinion but sometimes seem to get attacked by some in the process. Overall those on this site are very helpfull and supportive and I thank you all for making this a great place.

poohsmomma Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:36pm
post #4 of 55

AMEN!!!!

And thanks for the awesome poem....

cindy1176 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:44pm
post #5 of 55

Nicely said...and I didn't realize it was a poem at first, lol!

auntbeesbaking Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:46pm
post #6 of 55

WOW! You have an AMAZING gift (next to decorating cakes of course!).

THANK YOU for taking the time to do that and to share it with us! icon_smile.gif

cutthecake Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:55pm
post #7 of 55

You hit so many nails on their heads! I hope your very wise words help!

Pastry-Panda Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:56pm
post #8 of 55

I agree , that was awesome!!!!!!!

Thank you soooo much!!!!

cc57 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 8:58pm
post #9 of 55

Thank you for that, as a new member here, I found some awkward "not quite sure how to take that" things said and it is very off putting.

mgwebb68 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:06pm
post #10 of 55

Thank you for posting that!! I'm just a hobby baker, and I'm proud of that. I don't want to do it to make money. I get a great sense of accomplishment and pride in what I do just based on family and friend's reactions to my "creations". Sometimes I see where some people respond to posts with, like your poem said, a chip on thier shoulder. Most of the folks here are wonderful and very helpful. However, am careful what I reply to based on who has already replied.

This is a wonderful community and I have learned more in the short time that I have been a member. Something that was just an interest before has become a passion for me and I owe that to the wonderful people here and the awsome display of their talents.

Thank you again for you poem!!!

GayeG Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:07pm
post #11 of 55

Thanx Amy - for reminding us that there are "real" people behind their posts - not just typing!
It felt like a warm hug today =} Thanx for sharing!

tamarawagner99 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:22pm
post #12 of 55

That was wonderful! Thank you! I will definitely think twice and remember it by going on to something constructive like a positive thread, as there are plenty of them, or a how-to video when I see something negative/nasty and feel the need to reply. icon_smile.gif

jackmo Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:32pm
post #13 of 55

you are very gifted! Wonderful poem that tells it like it is!

nannie Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:47pm
post #14 of 55

what a gifted writer your are.

thanks so much for sharing.

this should me required reading.


Happy Thoughts to all at CC

Amymnn Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:51pm
post #15 of 55

Wow, thank you all for such kind compliments! I'm glad you liked it! icon_smile.gificon_smile.gificon_smile.gif

-K8memphis Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:55pm
post #16 of 55

Wow that was so cool.

Legacy words, words to aspire to for sure.

Beautiful and beautifully done.

icer101 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 9:55pm
post #17 of 55

wonderfully said.. i really am glad you posted this.. it will hit home to all of us c/cer . ever which category we fall in.. and for me.. i know i have never hurt anyone with my words..

nannie Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:01pm
post #18 of 55

hey Amymnn

where are you in Illinois. I'm in Evanston near Chicago

Are you coming to ICES in St Charles at the end of the month?

Amymnn Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:02pm
post #19 of 55

Nannie: Sent you a pm icon_smile.gif Unfortunately, I can't afford to go to ICES, but I would love, love, love to!

OhMyGanache Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:06pm
post #20 of 55

That was a very lovely poem. I've gotten used to the people who post here because it's cheaper/easier than therapy (heck, just had someone leave a negative comment on my photo the other day! I just laugh) ... but it's great to remind people that it's not just screen names, but real people online.

Lita829 Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:07pm
post #21 of 55

Well said...and I totally agree. That was an awesome poem...words to live by. Thank you icon_smile.gif

zoomzone Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:08pm
post #22 of 55

Thank you for posting this! thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif

woodruffbn Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:34pm
post #23 of 55

AWESOME, AWESOME, AWESOME! Great post! Its nice to see that after some of what I have seen today. Thank you! And you definately have a way with words!!!

Deb_ Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 10:53pm
post #24 of 55

I honestly believe that the good FAR outweigh the bad on this site.

I can only think of a few members that I try to avoid any sort of interaction with, and they don't even post much anymore. They just show up once in a while to "stir the pot".

CC is overall a great community.


Your poem was great though, you are a very talented writer!

PattyT Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 11:13pm
post #25 of 55

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Amynmm speaks the truth
Which inspires us too!

Thanks for the nice post at the end of a long day.

bobwonderbuns Posted 13 Jul 2009 , 11:52pm
post #26 of 55

There's been so many people who have helped me throughout my career that I'm always happy to help others if I can. I come to be the blessing and return I get the blessing! icon_biggrin.gif

CanadianCakin Posted 14 Jul 2009 , 12:46am
post #27 of 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhMyGanache

That was a very lovely poem. I've gotten used to the people who post here because it's cheaper/easier than therapy (heck, just had someone leave a negative comment on my photo the other day! I just laugh) ... but it's great to remind people that it's not just screen names, but real people online.




I read the comments I cannot believe they would write that! I am so sorry I am glad you can laugh that off! I don't know if I could. This definalty goes to show why those two need to read this poem!
BTW I think your cake is lovely! I would love to see more of your work!

I know this isn't really on topic with the OP, and my apologies, but I had to respond this!

OhMyGanache Posted 14 Jul 2009 , 1:04am
post #28 of 55
Quote:
Originally Posted by momma_ash

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhMyGanache

That was a very lovely poem. I've gotten used to the people who post here because it's cheaper/easier than therapy (heck, just had someone leave a negative comment on my photo the other day! I just laugh) ... but it's great to remind people that it's not just screen names, but real people online.



I read the comments I cannot believe they would write that! I am so sorry I am glad you can laugh that off! I don't know if I could. This definalty goes to show why those two need to read this poem!
BTW I think your cake is lovely! I would love to see more of your work!

I know this isn't really on topic with the OP, and my apologies, but I had to respond this!




Sorry - didn't mean to make this into anything about me... just pointing out that while I can shrug this kind of stuff off, not everyone can. I do appreciate your support. icon_wink.gif

CanadianCakin Posted 14 Jul 2009 , 1:39am
post #29 of 55

OhMyGanache- I actually think its a great example of why everyone should read the poem and it should be a sticky! I commend you for for your tolerance and strength in putting forth a true example of what we shouldn't see here!!

xstitcher Posted 14 Jul 2009 , 4:10am
post #30 of 55

Thanks for posting it. You definitely have a way with words! thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif

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