Help - Need To Make Decision This Morning.....

Business By Loucinda Updated 25 Aug 2009 , 5:17pm by CutiePieCakes-Ontario

Loucinda Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:21pm
post #1 of 25

Hi all -
I think I may have a little bridezilla here. I would really appreciate some advice on how to handle the situation.
Background......she got my name from a bride who was wonderful - and still is (always handing out my card and bragging on her wedding cake! - she is a business owner and is a very important client of mine) Anyhow -the customer gave me a deposit in April for a wedding cake for 7/18 - has scheduled 4 different tastings (but for one reason or another) has cancelled each of them - in advance, so it wasn't really a problem for me.
Fast forward to last week - sets a final date for the tasting (yesterday) and I tell her payment in full is required at the time of tasting since we are only a week out (NEVER had this happen before) Ok. Bride, Mom and Mom's best friend show up - Mom and best friend LOVE my cake, bride OBVIOUSLY does not. (making faces as she eats it....yeah, a grown woman) Mom is saying how wonderful it is....and on and on. Bride, asks if I can make a cake mix cake for the wedding she doesn't LIKE this cake at all. (which is WASC and a chocolate one) I say sure I can make a cake mix... continuing on a next post, no more room here!

24 replies
Loucinda Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:30pm
post #2 of 25

Brides mother (and friend) are telling her that the cakes are wonderful and it will be fine - but can I just do a cake mix to make the bride happy?? Sure..... now she says she wants cake for 100 (and then is out loud saying...well, Sam won't eat cake, and Martha won't eat cake, and Joe won't eat cake......) Can we do the cake for 90 instead? BUT she wants a dummy layer to make the cake LOOK bigger....and she wants it on either my round silver plateau or my lexan fountain stand (which she wants pics of before she decides) AND can she have another tasting with just the cake mix cake??? I did NOT even get a contract out - getting a bad feeling about how she is behaving......the Mother however, gives me a check for the balance that would be due in full.....and is saying it will be fine.

I still have the check - (UN cashed) and there is NO contract (first time for this) I REALLY want to just send the uncashed check and her deposit back and tell her I am sorry I don't feel comfortable making a cake for you.

Can the pros who have dealt with this stuff please give me some advice? I want to tell her this morning if I am not going to do her cake.

Mac Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:39pm
post #3 of 25

I would just tell the bride "no more tastings" due to the lack of time and remind her that SHE was the one who cancelled the other tastings. THEY need to make a decision and make it now. "and no, I cannot show you a pic of the stand" unless you can find one on the internet.

You have gone way beyond the realm of good manners when dealing with someone like this but if you do this cake, you still need to have them sign a contract with ALL the details. Like bride requested "cake mix cake".

tincanbaby Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:41pm
post #4 of 25

Mother of the bride knows her daughter can't make up her mind on anything. Contact the bride herself, give her today to tell you on contract exactly what she wants, if she cannot do it. Give the money back. Explain to her that you cannot do any cakes without a confirm contract.

tincanbaby Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:42pm
post #5 of 25

Mother of the bride knows her daughter can't make up her mind on anything. Contact the bride herself, give her today to tell you on contract exactly what she wants, if she cannot do it. Give the money back. Explain to her that you cannot do any cakes without a confirm contract.

Mac Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:43pm
post #6 of 25

I would just tell the bride "no more tastings" due to the lack of time and remind her that SHE was the one who cancelled the other tastings. THEY need to make a decision and make it now. "and no, I cannot show you a pic of the stand" unless you can find one on the internet.

You have gone way beyond the realm of good manners when dealing with someone like this but if you do this cake, you still need to have them sign a contract with ALL the details. Like bride requested "cake mix cake".

Loucinda Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 12:46pm
post #7 of 25

That is my problem, the mother is fine with me doing the cake - gave me the check for payment in full. I am NOT doing another tasting for her (just gave that tidbit of info that she wanted one!) I just have a feeling I am being set up for a free cake in the end (which is only 11 days out from today)

One more thing, she brought a very BADLY distorted printed pic of the cake she wants, said she would email me a good pic of it last night - I still have not received the email.

I chose not to fill out the contract last night (had it setting there in front of me) when she kept saying how she really didn't care for the cake. It was the Mother and her friend who wooed over it and said it would be fine - she would get her cake mix cake and it would be just fine.

pianocat Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:02pm
post #8 of 25

I personally would not do this cake. There are some people who cannot be pleased and this Bridezilla would seem to be one of them. I am not in business-I am a hobby baker, but I don't think the money would be worth the headache.

cakesbycathy Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:16pm
post #9 of 25

Call MOB and tell her you are returning her check today. Tell her it is obvious that her daughter is not going to be happy and you just don't want to "ruin the bride's big day." icon_rolleyes.gif

As a nice gesture, if there is someone or someplace else you can recommend I would give MOB that number.

DessertDreams Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:25pm
post #10 of 25

I haven't been in this situation before but I would pass on doing this cake. If an undoctored box cake mix is not what you normally serve I wouldn't do it. I am not saying that there is anything wrong with cake mix. But, you are putting your name and rep on something that does not represent the product that you normally serve. If she, the Bride, does not like your cake she is free to purchase a cake from another baker that serves the type of cake she wants. You don't have a contract....just give her back her money. You see the RED FLAGS waving. Go with your GUT.

MikeRowesHunny Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:30pm
post #11 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by cakesbycathy


As a nice gesture, if there is someone or someplace else you can recommend I would give MOB that number.




Or send her to any competition you don't like icon_evil.gif (j/k)!

Seriously, I wouldn't touch this cake with a 10ft pole. It seems that you don't even have the details of it really settled. How did you even price the cake when you couldn't really see what you were meant to be doing from the pic?!

Send her on down to Walmart, they are about the only dumbwits who would take on this nightmare so close to the date, and at least she'd get her delicious cake mix cake that way thumbs_up.gif

Loucinda Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:32pm
post #12 of 25

Thanks ladies for responding....that is really what I wanted to do from the get go last night. I have just never been in this situation before - and I am NOT comfortable at all with any of it. (which is why I didn't get the contract out - I just didn't feel she really wanted my cake, and I didn't want to be locked in.....)

I am off - I will send her to someone I know that is more her personality! icon_twisted.gif

matthewkyrankelly Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:33pm
post #13 of 25

I would call the MOB and explain the situation to her. She sounds reasonable. Tell her that you would love to do the cake, but her daughter obviously doesn't want it and you don't want to upset her on her wedding day. If the MOB wants a cake you'll do it for her. Put extra restrictions in your contract about the late date etc. Do the contract with the MOB explaining that you wouldn't feel comfortable doing a cake for someone that obviously didn't want it. That way, you can do a cake and get paid by someone who appreciates it(MOB), and not leave the family in the lurch for a last minute cake if they need it. (Since it is often the family who puts on these weddings anyway!) Give the mom a backup plan if she needs it, but get her to sign that contract today!

ccr03 Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:52pm
post #14 of 25

You know, it might be too late, but I would do the cake. She paid you a deposit in April and leaving her high and dry is not cool a week before the wedding. I understand you not wanting to do a cake for someone that may not want it, but that's the bride's fault for waiting so long to do a tasting - you get what you get.

I know we have our businesses so we can say yes to orders we want and no to orders we don't, but in reality and in business, you can't always do that if you want to be successful. And cancelling on the last minute would be rude and unprofessional. Not to offend you or anything, but you should have had a cut-off date as to when all the details needed to be complete prior to the wedding.

What would I do? I'd contact the MOB & B2B and tell them that no tasting is possible this late of date and you'll be proceeding with the cake as planned. Also send them the completed contract and tell them that in order to do the cake you must have it signed.

Those are my two cents for what it's worth. Good luck! icon_biggrin.gif

cylstrial Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 1:59pm
post #15 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by matthewkyrankelly

I would call the MOB and explain the situation to her. She sounds reasonable. Tell her that you would love to do the cake, but her daughter obviously doesn't want it and you don't want to upset her on her wedding day. If the MOB wants a cake you'll do it for her. Put extra restrictions in your contract about the late date etc. Do the contract with the MOB explaining that you wouldn't feel comfortable doing a cake for someone that obviously didn't want it. That way, you can do a cake and get paid by someone who appreciates it(MOB), and not leave the family in the lurch for a last minute cake if they need it. (Since it is often the family who puts on these weddings anyway!) Give the mom a backup plan if she needs it, but get her to sign that contract today!




I agree with matthewkyrankelly ! It's always so much more complicated when your friends with the people. Which is why the bride must really be a bridezilla. I mean she knows that one of the ladies is your friend!

Let us know what you decide to do!

smoore Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 2:07pm
post #16 of 25

Since the MOB is paying you for the cake in full now, I'd tell the MOB that she, not the bride, is going to be considered the customer. Have the MOB sign the contract. Approve any wants the bride has with the MOB, so it's clear throughout that the MOB is the actual customer. If the bride isn't happy on her wedding day ... too bad. She wasn't the client. If they want another tasting, they can order a cake at your regular price. One tasting per wedding .... period. And, at this late time, you don't have time in your schedule to sit in another tasting. I'd feel worse letting the MOB go, keeping her deposit, with only a week to go .... especially since the bride isn't going to like anything from anywhere.

Loucinda Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 2:11pm
post #17 of 25

OK - it is all done now. I first called the client who reccommended me, and told her - (and she was again wonderful - said she understands and will still give my name out) Call #2 went to MOB - got voice mail, left her a message. Call #3 went to bride - who screamed and cussed prolifically.....and was yelling at her mother (who was obviously there) I asked several times to please let me speak to the mother - she finally did. I was very calm and told her that she was at the tasting, and she knew her daughter was not happy with my product (even though she was) - I said the day is for her and I do NOT want to be the person to ruin her wedding day. She should love everything about her day and I OBVIOUSLY was not the baker that would make a cake that would please her. The bride kept raving about a bakery she liked at the tasting, and I suggested to the MOB to call that bakery, I am sure they would have time (11 days) to make her the cake she really wants. She MOB was very understanding and kind - said she loved my cakes and they were gorgeous and she wished that it had worked out for them. Bride was screaming in the background that I have not heard the last from her. I put their checks in the mail already today. Thanks everyone for your support.

minicuppie Posted 7 Jul 2009 , 2:21pm
post #18 of 25

I just went thru something very much like your situation. The groom works for my DH and requested a very strict budget for 85 people (1st red flag). I sent his darling BTB a welcome/congrats email and requsted she contact me re tasting and cake design...she sent a message thru my DH to bring design books and pix of my previous cakes to work and give to the groom to "borrow" (2nd flag). Sent her ANOTHER email about tasting and budget. Still has groom?employee trying to order thru the DH. I had him tell the EMPLOYEE that I only do a certain number of weddings each week and now I am totally booked with deposits in place. I suspect this Bridezilla has her heart set on something over budget and is using me to prove some point. Someone should clue her to the fact that this is her one and only's 4th trip down the aisle.

imanah Posted 9 Jul 2009 , 4:24am
post #19 of 25

Your experience reminded me of that cake boss episode where the bride wrecked her cake by putting all this colored buttercream on it. SOme people just need medication, I think your bridzilla needs that and to grow up!

__Jamie__ Posted 9 Jul 2009 , 5:19am
post #20 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loucinda

OK - it is all done now. I first called the client who reccommended me, and told her - (and she was again wonderful - said she understands and will still give my name out) Call #2 went to MOB - got voice mail, left her a message. Call #3 went to bride - who screamed and cussed prolifically.....and was yelling at her mother (who was obviously there) I asked several times to please let me speak to the mother - she finally did. I was very calm and told her that she was at the tasting, and she knew her daughter was not happy with my product (even though she was) - I said the day is for her and I do NOT want to be the person to ruin her wedding day. She should love everything about her day and I OBVIOUSLY was not the baker that would make a cake that would please her. The bride kept raving about a bakery she liked at the tasting, and I suggested to the MOB to call that bakery, I am sure they would have time (11 days) to make her the cake she really wants. She MOB was very understanding and kind - said she loved my cakes and they were gorgeous and she wished that it had worked out for them. Bride was screaming in the background that I have not heard the last from her. I put their checks in the mail already today. Thanks everyone for your support.




Awesome! All the grace and dignity I hope to muster should this ever happen to me. Well handled!

__Jamie__ Posted 9 Jul 2009 , 5:20am
post #21 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loucinda

OK - it is all done now. I first called the client who reccommended me, and told her - (and she was again wonderful - said she understands and will still give my name out) Call #2 went to MOB - got voice mail, left her a message. Call #3 went to bride - who screamed and cussed prolifically.....and was yelling at her mother (who was obviously there) I asked several times to please let me speak to the mother - she finally did. I was very calm and told her that she was at the tasting, and she knew her daughter was not happy with my product (even though she was) - I said the day is for her and I do NOT want to be the person to ruin her wedding day. She should love everything about her day and I OBVIOUSLY was not the baker that would make a cake that would please her. The bride kept raving about a bakery she liked at the tasting, and I suggested to the MOB to call that bakery, I am sure they would have time (11 days) to make her the cake she really wants. She MOB was very understanding and kind - said she loved my cakes and they were gorgeous and she wished that it had worked out for them. Bride was screaming in the background that I have not heard the last from her. I put their checks in the mail already today. Thanks everyone for your support.




I bet Mom wishes she could put her daughter in an envelope and mail her somewhere. icon_twisted.gificon_twisted.gif

Loucinda Posted 9 Jul 2009 , 12:44pm
post #22 of 25

Of that I have no doubt _Jaime_!!

Just an FYI - for those that took the time to read and respond to try to help me - I really appreciated it. With me not being a pro at this yet, your input is invaluable to me.

minicuppie Posted 25 Aug 2009 , 12:37pm
post #23 of 25

Still hijacking this thread. I am sooo glad I didn't do that cake. #1 The B&G both wore white (puleeze!). #2. Everyone else except the officiant wore bright purple and the cake matched! #3 The wedding and reception were held in an unairconditioned barn, in Texas, in August. Nuf said. Altho I heard there was a very nice open bar.

Loucinda Posted 25 Aug 2009 , 12:56pm
post #24 of 25

Here is an added note on my original post (I didn't want to bring it back to the front - but since it is there......) The venue where this wedding was to take place is on a main street here in our town, I just happened to be driving by the day (and close to the time) of her reception. Not ONE car in the parking lot. I obviously have no clue as to what took place, but I really think that the wedding was cancelled. I just had a bad feeling from the beginning with the way she acted, from the looks of that parking lot - it must not have worked out well for her. (maybe she knew in the back of her mind it wasn't going to really happen and that is why she behaved so badly??)

CutiePieCakes-Ontario Posted 25 Aug 2009 , 5:17pm
post #25 of 25

Well, Loucinda, you can definitely chalk this one up to your 6th Sense. If it doesn`t feel right, don`t do it! Sometimes a tough call, but one you had to make.

And I bet you`re right. Considering what you saw (or more precisely, didn`t see) in the venue parking lot speaks volumes. (And I bet the MOB is grateful she didn`t have to call and cancel with you, either.)

Minicuuppie - The groom`s FOURTH wedding! Egads. Maybe you`ll be making her `Thank God I`m Outta THAT Relationship`cake.

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