OK, Sadsmile, first of all your cakes are gorgeous and that hat box cake is nothing less than SPECTACULAR!!!

Ignore the comments from your aunt and do the best, most beautiful cake you can for your dear grandmother - four tiers, gorgeous flowers and lace, filigree, stringwork, handpainting - GO FOR IT!!!

It's not your aunt's place to tell you or anyone else what to make, especially when it comes to a special birthday cake. And we all wanna see pictures of that gorgeous cake when you get it finished!!

Well said, Varika

I think I'm with the small handful saying (a) mom shouldn't have forwarded that if she knew you'd find it offensive and (b) I guess I don't think it's all that offensive.

Without knowing what Aunty meant by it, I can't run around screaming "what a hurtful bitch".

Did Aunt mean "it seems excessive to put all that time into something to be eaten"? Did she mean "no one ate the fondant, so why did she bother?" Did she mean "it was too fancy for a homey family party"?

there are lots of things she could have meant, none of them meant to be offensive.

Lots of people think it's strange that I put hours into icing cakes or cupcakes - and that's fine. I think it's a waste of time to go skiing, or watch hours of sitcoms or listen to the Jonas Brothers. I think it's strange that people will pay money to watch other people beat each other up - or even more so, that people participate. Doesn't mean that I'm being rude when I say "don't bother buying me a ski pass, I'll meet you at the lodge for cocoa".

Y'know?

The cake was a gift. I think anytime someone judges someone else's gift-giving, they don't have pure, productive, innocent or helpful motives. I don't care how old they are, what their generation is or if their Uncle spilled sugar one day and was eaten by a lion while cleaning it up and then caused a sugar-hate complex to the Aunt. It wasn't a nice thing to say. In my (very cranky tonight) opinion.

I think the comment about the "veg baked beans" says it all
Sounds like she really watches her own intake and has her own thoughts on healthy stuff. Just what I'm inferring from the dish and her other comments... The cake sounds beautiful; don't let one person's nazi approach to food steal your joy. I call them the "sugar nazis." My mom tends to that end w/ salt and sugar but we just tease her.
Everyone else will enjoy your work of art, especially your nana

Mel Mc.

I was and still am irked by the wording. But I think those of you who talked about post depression era and not wasting is probably more on track with My Aunt.

Aunt Nasty...ROFLMBO thats a funny one. She has always been nice to me. I am kind of the golden grandchild in the family and all my Aunts have alwasy been nice to me. Though my cousin who is Aunt Nasty's daughter in law will just love that nic name. I can hear her laughing now. This Aunt has lived up to that name to my poor cousin.

ON Mother's Day another family member also brought dessert cake logs so there was more than enough and more than we needed. I might suggest pie or fresh fruit as an alternative desssert to my cake this time around. Better planning makes for less waste.

I will alwasy be looking over my shoulder for the sugar police now and feel as they may swoop down on me at any moment. And I am a grown woman and make up my own mind. I will make what I make and I will make it special.
My family always has been over bearing with their advice and it comes across more as orders from headquarters. But, they dont get their panties too much in a bunch when someone doesnt listen or follow their advice either. My mom says this Aunt has gotten more short spoken with age and it was just blunt and she most likely wouldnt have thought it sounded the way it did. My mom assured me she probably meant more as a dont go overboard and spend so much time because its just cake. But she doesnt understand like all of you do that it is a way to express my love. She is very practical and a bargain hunting, thrift store loving woman. You should see the stuff that makes its way to my house for me and my kids. Good gravy...LOL

I think I will try to make something that is more completely edible this time but still special. My family does have a good sense of humor and we have always given my Nanny Maxine cards from hallmark. I am not completely sold on it but a Crap Your Old cake with Maxine on the potty and maybe her dog sniffing around a mini B-day cake would sure be funny! I dont know though it might make my Nanny laugh so hard shed get heart palpatations. Maybe a flour pot or a really traditional cake. Maybe I could misspell it like wally world would. Hahaha I think Ill lose the gumpaste and fondant this time around and use white chocolate and choc Ganache so it wont seam like so much.

And really there isnt anything to the veggie baked beans. Im telling you she opens a can of Bushs Beans. And it was probably an attempt to let us know what kind because my family is allergic to milk, cheese yada yada.


Thanks for understanding guys! You always make me feel better!