Slowly Going Insane!!

Lounge By bakermommy4 Updated 23 May 2009 , 8:04pm by Carson

bakermommy4 Posted 22 May 2009 , 5:43pm
post #1 of 17

Totally off of the topic of cake, I spend a lot of time here on cc and thought why not come here when I'm under the weather and see if anyone else feels this way too sometimes. I'm kind of guilty for even feeling this way but today, I just don't wanna be a mom. I have 4 girls...10,6,4 and 2. I'm a week from graduating Culinary school, I've recently started my cake biz and it's not going so hot.

I feel overworked and under appreciated. I'm going to the Jonas Brothers concert with my 10 yr old, I'm singing Dora the Explorer with my 2 yr old all day...my 6 year old is begging me to let her be gothic and wear black nail polish...my 4 year old walks my 2 year old around the house with a belt tied around her belly like shes a dog....there's orchestra practices and basketball practices. I can't sleep because the theme song to Dora and Wow Wow Wubbzy repeats in my head until I'm about to go crazy. I love them too death don't get me wrong but I never have a break. My husband works 12 hours a day, and my job is the girls, and my failing cake biz. I give them ALLLL my time and attention and feel a little selfish this morning cuz I just want to be ALONE.

I'm done venting...and today, I just want to lock myself in the bathroom and let them run the whole house. I feel so bad cuz their my angels but today...I see the little horns growing from their heads and I just wanna run away!!! Please tell me I'm not the only one that feels like this.

Ok, I'm done...sorry this is so long. Holding back tears!!

16 replies
Texas_Rose Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:21pm
post #2 of 17

Time to go to the Redbox, get a few kid movies that they've never seen before, and buy yourself a little peace and quiet...and a bottle of wine for this evening after they're asleep.

My daughter wanted to do the goth thing when she was 6. I told her she could dress however she wanted at home but when we went out she'd better look like a little girl. Sometimes she still slinks around the house in black velvet with rings drawn around her eyes...but not so often anymore.

Walking the kid with a belt around the middle is just how some kids play pets. I used to babysit a girl who wanted to do that to my kids and it drove me up the wall. I was a little concerned about safety issues too. I told her she could do it to our stuffed animals but not to people.

I know how you feel though...my husband worked two full-time jobs for a couple of years and the money was nice but going days without talking to other grownups wasn't nice. I was babysitting for extra cash too, and so I didn't just have to deal with my kids' diapers and nonstop kid TV, but I had to help kids with homework and try to take everyone out to run around outside so they'd quit climbing my walls. On top of that, my husband thought since I was not working I should be his personal chef and maid. Some of the dinners he decided he wanted would take me 4 hours to make. When he quit working the 2nd job, he didn't start helping, or expecting any less from me. Now he's got a job where he sits on his butt all night long playing games on his cell phone and reading magazines, so he gets a break 8 hours a day and he sleeps another 12 hours each day. I've been having my own personal pity party for about a year...I was really depressed but didn't want to see a doc for it. I kept thinking I was miserable just being Mom and not getting to be my own person, even for a little while. Then I broke my leg and couldn't do all the stuff I usually do...my 3 year old didn't get a bath for 2 weeks (hubby doesn't do kid baths), my 7 year old went to school with her clothes mismatched and her homework left unfinished, no laundry got done let alone ironed, dinner was takeout every night because hubby doesn't cook anything except mac & cheese. It was actually kind of satisfying watching the household go to he!! just because I was out of commission. Of course it couldn't last...I rented a wheelchair so I could get back to taking care of all of them...but at least I got to see how much they needed me.

I think all moms get a little frustrated now and then. I've got a friend who keeps a bottle of Crown Royal in the freezer and when her kids get on her nerves, she tells them she's going to cool her head off, but she takes a couple of sips while her head is stuck in there icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

One thing that might make you feel a bit better is to get a sitter and go on a date with your husband, every once in a while. I know it helps me to get out of the house without my little people when I can.

cakes22 Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:23pm
post #3 of 17

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!! icon_wink.gif Let it out, there there (patting you on the back and sending you ((((hugs)))) )

Is there a support group for us mom's? I ranted last week about being a mom (can't find the post now) and this week is no better.

My kids are 15 & 11, but in my daycare I have a 6 yr old & three 4 yr olds. By the end of the day I just want 30 minutes of silence. I'm positive they have 666 tattooed somewhere on them, I just haven't found it yet

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Hope you have a better evening. When all else fails, there is always wine!!! thumbs_up.gif

bakermommy4 Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:36pm
post #4 of 17

TexasRose...aren't you thrown back about her being ONLY 6 going through the goth thing. I thought my little girl was crazy!! I'm like ok...more monitoring on what your watching. Where do they come up with these things...she wants black tights and black lip stick and the whole 9 yards...again...SHE'S 6!!!! Oh, and I just didn't even want to go there on the hubby who thinks that its so much more difficult to work 12 hours than it is to here constant babble and fussing and even loud laughter is irritating sometimes. He doesn't led much of a helping hand. He's the favorite parent...coming home from work with candy for the ALREADY CRAZY kids.

cakes22...3 FOUR YEAR OLDS...(tilting hat to you) How do you manage?? I would have to jump off of our balcony...which isn't even high enough to break a leg...but I'd still go diving off!!

I swear I feel better already and the bottle in the freezer is the most AWESOME ideal ever...I'm so on top of that.

THANX LADIES...I KNEW THIS WOULD MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!!!!

cakes22 Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:42pm
post #5 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by bakermommy4



cakes22...3 FOUR YEAR OLDS...(tilting hat to you) How do you manage?? I would have to jump off of our balcony...which isn't even high enough to break a leg...but I'd still go diving off!!




Easy!!! I lock'em in the closet!!! icon_biggrin.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

TOTALLY KIDDING!!!!

Actually, they are much easier to deal with when there are more of them cause they play with each other. And they have been together since they were 10 months (that was a fun time!!!).

At the age of 6 I didn't know what a goth was. Became one for a VERY brief period while in highschool, but I didn't like looking like death warmed over.

Raising the wine glass to all moms!!!! (wait, it's only 2:45 here, make it an afternoon tea, which can be just as nice).

Wine chilling in the freezer too.......

summernoelle Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:45pm
post #6 of 17

Oh, I have those days as well. I adore my children, they are my favorite people in the entire world. But sometimes, some days, it is tough. (My son does the same thing with the leash and my daughter. Ha ha!) The most important thing you can do is to get a break, somehow. Family, MDO, something to let you get a few hours, or a night, of peace. Also, for me, just getting them out of the house works! Take them to McDonald's so you can read a magazine while they munch and play. Or to a park where they can wear themselves out, but you can rest. When I can't get someone to help me with the kids, I just try to take them somewhere where that's what I can do-rest while they play.

(((((hugs!))))) And for me, the mommy guilt of they won't be little forever always gets to me, LOL.

Texas_Rose Posted 22 May 2009 , 6:54pm
post #7 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by bakermommy4

TexasRose...aren't you thrown back about her being ONLY 6 going through the goth thing. I thought my little girl was crazy!! I'm like ok...more monitoring on what your watching. Where do they come up with these things...she wants black tights and black lip stick and the whole 9 yards...again...SHE'S 6!!!!




I figure it's better to get it over with while she's little and I can control what she goes out of the house in. icon_biggrin.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif And before she gets big enough that they make fishnet stockings in her size. She's always been a little strange though...her aunts let her watch Chicago when she was 3 (I was in the hospital) and after that she took a pair of my trouser socks and pulled them up to be thigh highs icon_lol.gif The closest she comes to going out of the house looking goth is a black dress with rainbow stripes and some black tights. I let her wear tights whenever she wants...it's usually only about 100 degrees outside here, so let her suffer for her look. And unlike her aunt who does the goth thing, Valerie's clothes are clean at least, and don't have holes. The only thing that bugs me is that she will take grape koolaid powder and paint her lips with it. That doesn't really wash off for about a day. It is kind of a big change from her princess years...when she was 2, the only clothes she would leave on was her Snow White dress. I had to buy a couple of them and just let her wear them, because otherwise she would strip everywhere we went. I thought the princess years were bad, but I wouldn't mind if she decided to go back to them.

bakermommy4 Posted 22 May 2009 , 7:06pm
post #8 of 17

I guess your right...let her get it out her system now. I just can't believe how kids are so different now from when I was growing up. My 10 year old is begging me to get her an acting and vocal coach because she is determined it is the only way she'll ever meet the Jonas Brothers...and she is DEAD SERIOUS!!
Honestly, I feel like I've spoiled them because of my crappy childhood to the point of no return. I can only imagine how things will be when their older. My daughter has a better computer, cell phone, clothes and hairdo's than I...and it's still not enough. If I were to bring the Jonas Brothers to our house for dinner, she'd probably complain "but mom...I wanted them to come to lunch not dinner...whiiinnnee".
Texas Rose, I'm in Vegas and it's about 100 degrees here now too and both my oldest girls are infatuated with skinny jeans. No matter how I try to dress them in the cutest little short sets, they refuse so I too let them suffer with tight denim painted on their little legs until they sweat themselves to death. Anything in the name of fashion I guess!!

mbelgard Posted 23 May 2009 , 12:59am
post #9 of 17

We all have days when we want to gag our children and throw them in the closet.

Yesterday I wanted to lock my kids out. It was the last day of school and after a year of complaining about having to go to school they were moping and SAD that school was done for the year. My 6 year old was the worst, he had claimed to HATE school all year but cried in the morning because it was the last day.



On the clothes/body art end I'm dealing with a 10 year old who is pissed that I won't let him get tattoos or peirce more than his ears once each. He also wants a mohawk in a bright color, his father says no to that. My 6 year old is really interested in nail polish right now, you should see how that freaks out his grandpa. icon_lol.gif

I also get to hear about how mean I am because I won't let them have a pet tarantula. I'm so mean that I let their uncle give them an iguana and a snake.

-Tubbs Posted 23 May 2009 , 2:04am
post #10 of 17

Sorry, but your post made me laugh! Awww, you really need a break. Do you have a babysitting co-op near you? If not, you could start one! ('cause I'm sure you don't have enough to do)...

Please believe me when I say it will SUDDENLY improve. Within a year or two, the eldest will be responsible enough that you can leave them all home for a quick trip to the supermarket, or to buy gas, or to clear your head. That makes the biggest difference.

My daughter also went through an odd stage at about 6. She desperately wanted her nose pierced, and when I (obviously!) wouldn't let her, she drew one on instead with marker. That lasted a surprisingly long time actually, but she did come through it. Now she's 13 and kind of going back that way...

Sorry to hear about your business. What's not going so great?

bakermommy4 Posted 23 May 2009 , 5:25am
post #11 of 17

Well, when I was practicing and "giving" cakes away...people were tearing my door down. Now that I'm licensed, everyone has disappeared...go figure.

en-passant Posted 23 May 2009 , 6:24am
post #12 of 17

Good grief.... reading these kinds of posts make me glad of my decision never to reproduce!

Hat's off to y'all.

bebea Posted 23 May 2009 , 4:22pm
post #13 of 17

hey, i feel your pain...i have 3 teenagers in my household! my daughter is 14, my stepsons are 14 and 16. hormones are raging, grades are suffering...you get the idea. and i couldn't have 3 more distinct personalities if i had tried!!!

everyone has tough times w/ their kids - don't feel bad about it at all. my daughter lost her left eye last labor day wknd, it was a freak accident involving her oldest stepbrother - i really do mean freak accident. he has spent the last months beating himself up about it while my daughter gets mad at him for beating himself up - she does not blame him in any way, shape, form or fashion. and the younger stepson just lives in his happy own world - as long as its his way, everything is fine.

so, yeah, i have days where i want to ship them all off! but, i just lock myself in the bathroom w/ a bubble bath and an iced coffee...and keep telling myself it will be okay!

Minstrelmiss Posted 23 May 2009 , 6:42pm
post #14 of 17

I wish I could send all of you mamas a cupcake icon_wink.gif

You make me realize I still need to wait to have kids! Thankfully hubby wants to wait too..we are both 27 and his parents make me feel old and obligated to conceive! *pffff* raspberries to them!

Keep your chin up mamas! thumbs_up.gif

Cakepro Posted 23 May 2009 , 6:43pm
post #15 of 17

LOL!! I loved reading this thread! It definitely brought back memories...(except your post, bebea...I am so sorry for what your daughter and stepson and you are going through).

Now my kids are 15, 16, and 17 and are all just independent almost-adults. It's both wonderful and sad.

Enjoy all of those amazing moments, the little arms wrapped around your neck, the warmth of the little body sleeping on yours on those "clingy" days...the little Mickey Mouse voices singing songs...it's all over with so, so fast. I wish I had more kids but now will wait for the grandbabies.

Being a mother is the single most important thing I have ever accomplished as a human being, and the rewards definitely outweigh those days when things feel a bit overwhelming.

Hugs to all you mamas!! You are amazing women!

bakermommy4 Posted 23 May 2009 , 7:38pm
post #16 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cakepro



Being a mother is the single most important thing I have ever accomplished as a human being, and the rewards definitely outweigh those days when things feel a bit overwhelming.

Hugs to all you mamas!! You are amazing women!




I totally agree...even though sometimes I want to pack up a suitcase and go out to the store to get milk....wink wink. I wouldn't trade this experience for ANYTHING.
Bebea I'm really sorry about your daughter, you've done an awesome job at raising an understanding mature young lady for her not to be placing blame on her brother. I'm 31 and sometimes I think WOW, why did I have all of these children...I'm so overwhelmed. Then I realize how the good days surely outweigh the bad and I get over it.
Being a mom is the most important thing I've ever done in my life.

Carson Posted 23 May 2009 , 8:04pm
post #17 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cakepro

Enjoy all of those amazing moments, the little arms wrapped around your neck, the warmth of the little body sleeping on yours on those "clingy" days...the little Mickey Mouse voices singing songs...it's all over with so, so fast. I wish I had more kids but now will wait for the grandbabies.




Ok, at the start I was kind of smiling, thinking about how much it sounds like my life...then I get to Cakepro's post and was ready to cry! I just realized I haven't slowed down enough to day to give my girls a hug...after all that's the only pay cheque you get for being a Mother. Gotta get my hormones in check! lol, laughing, crying, soon I will be mad about something!

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