This is about my cat Kayla, the cat in my avatar. She is twelve years old and has never been sick. The last four days, she had not eaten at all. She was hiding under my bed and only came out to drink water or use the litter box.

I called my vet and found out she is on vacation for the next two weeks and won't be back until May 4th. I called the vet she recommended on the answering service and drove the hour and a half there to get her checked out. The place was very nice and the staff was wonderful.

So the vet checks her out and does blood work and x-rays. He tells me she is in end stage kidney falure. He does an ultrasound to see how much of her kidneys are viable and the news isn't good.

He said they could keep her for a few days and infuse her with liquid to see if she will rally. His hopes weren't very high. So, I had to make the hardest decision ever. In the end after much talking w/the staff, it was decided the most humane thing to do was to put her to sleep. I held her in my arms as they injected the IV line with the meds and just before she passed, she raised her head to look at me. They allowed me to stay with her for as long as I wanted.

I drove the hour and a half home in tears. I have been crying for hours now. I really love her and hope she is in a better place now.

Karen

I am so sorry for the loss of your cat. I do know exactly how you feel. I had to do the same thing with my cat years ago. It was a sad decision, but a logical, unselfish one. You did the right thing. I haven't had a cat since, but today I just adopted a kitten from the Humane Society.

I really feel bad for you .. I know how hard it is to have to make that decision. I had to make it twice and both times were really tough for me, but it was for the best and my mind knew that, but my heart sure didn't! I had to put down both my girls who were 15 and 16 years old ... I can't say the pain ever goes away, but it does get easier ... just know that you made the right decision, and be thankful you were able to be there to hold her during her last few moments here ... I'm sure she felt your love.

In Memory Of Kayla

Beyond The Rainbow

As much as I loved the life we had and all the times we played,
I was so very tired and knew my time on earth would fade.
I saw a wondrous image then of a place that's trouble-free
Where all of us can meet again to spend eternity.

I saw the most beautiful Rainbow, and on the other side
Were meadows rich and beautiful -- lush and green and wide!
And running through the meadows as far as the eye could see
Were animals of every sort as healthy as could be!
My own tired, failing body was fresh and healed and new
And I wanted to go run with them, but I had something left to do.

I needed to reach out to you, to tell you I'm all right
That this place is truly wonderful, then a bright Glow pierced the night.
'Twas the Glow of many Candles shining bright and strong and bold
And I knew then that it held your love in its brilliant shades of gold.

For although we may not be together in the way we used to be,
We are still connected by a cord no eye can see.
So whenever you need to find me, we're never far apart
If you look beyond the Rainbow and listen with your heart.

I totally sympathize with your pain. Just two years ago I had this same thing happen with my 17 year old, Rupert. It took me longer to make the decision that you made today, and I regret that because I realize now I did that for selfish reasons.

I admire you for making that choice to save your Kayla from more pain.

Now I have another kitty, Pepper, in my avatar and she is a lovely cat, but I still miss Rupert, will probably always miss Rupert. Although you are sad and hurting now, it does get easier with time.

kaseynh, my heart goes out to you. I recently lost my cat Shadow to Kidney failure. He had a good, long life (he was 20+ years old), but I still miss him so much.

I hope you never question your decision to put him to rest. I decided to let nature takes it's course with Shadow, and I sincerely regret that decision. Kidney failure is a slow and painful process and he suffered way too much. It was like he came apart piece by piece. First he lost his hearing, then his eyesight, and eventually he was paralyzed. I couldn't stand seeing him suffer anymore and finally took him to the vet and held him while they put him down. I wish I had been braver and done it sooner. He suffered way too long, and now when I think of him, it's hard to think of the happy times and not just the bad ones towards the end.

Sorry this is so long... I guess the topic just hit a nerve.

My heart goes out to you. It is such a difficult decision to make, and just as difficult to get over emotionally. You know you did the right thing for your friend but you still feel so horrible. Time won't heal that but it will make it easier.

I lost my Dobie, Anabelle, from kidney failure due to the poisoned dog food. I kept her alive for almost a year with a homemade holistic food concoction for kidney failure in dogs and she was doing very well. Just thin. Then she began to go into full blown failure. I was told it would probably be a matter of a couple of months.

When her brother, Edgar died of what they thought was an aneurysm in the back yard, that was it. She gave up...5 days later I had to have her put down.

I knew it had to be done, but it almost killed me to make that phone call and take her down to the vet's, especially after just losing her brother. Like you, they let me hold her and stay as long as I wanted. I knew it was the right thing to do as she was out of pain, but it didn't make it any easier.

After a while, at friends' and family's pushing, I got Isabella Fiore, this cute, tiny little Bull Mastiff puppy. She's now 11 months old, 120 lbs, still growing and a total clown.

Kayla will always have a place in your heart, and I know you'll always miss her, but time will pass and you'll be able to think of her and smile.

Thank you so much for your loving words and thoughts. I really appreciate it. This kitty was so special to me, we had a real connection. It was so hard to make that decision today.

I knew CC was the place I could reach out for support. You are so kind and loving and generous with your gifts.

I am so sorry for all of our losses. This is never easy. Thank you again!

Karen

Oh Karen I am so sorry for your loss. Kayla certainly was a beautiful cat. I can completely appreciate what you are feeling right now I too had to make that decision in the past with my 16 yr old cat Crystal.

Just know that your decision was for the best as now she won't suffer and she is at peace.

I know it doesn't take away the hurt that you're feeling right now, losing such a beautiful pet is never easy. They become part of our family, and they are always so loyal and loving.

Big ((((((((hugs))))))))) to you!

Deb

I'm so very sorry for your loss... pets are such a wonderful loving addition to our lives and nothing can ever replace the loving part of our life that they fulfill... my love and thoughts are with you at this horrible time.

So very sorry for your loss. I also had a cat with kidney failure....I took him to the vet 3x a week for 2 years for fluid treatment, and he did great. But when it was his time, it happened quickly. I admire you for being there for your kitty at the end...it was my one regret that my husband had to do it for me.

You made the right decision and did what was best for your kitty.

(((((((((heartfelt hugs)))))))))

Karen my thoughts are with you, i battled cancer myself 3 years ago just after i got my baby boy bengal kitten ramsay all my cats were a great comfort to me throughout the whole process ramsay however never left my side just as i was recovering and in remission he got sick and the vet operated to discover a huge tumor inside his small tummy.

He had to be put to sleep and i felt how cruel that he should "nurse" me then cancer took him from me and i maintain to this day that he went in place of me and he will always be in my heart lots of tears just writing this today it gets eaiser but you never forget.

This is for all who love their fur kids.

Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

I love the Rainbow Bridge... it always makes me cry... Someday I'll be so happy to see all my furbabies again

I know exactly how you feel. A couple months ago I had to put my dog down. I cried so hard, for days. As I held her I wanted to scream out "NO! Don't do it!", but I didn't. I let her go. The strange thing is I cried harder for my dog than I did for any of my grandparents. But I think it was because my grandparents were ill for a long time, and I didn't have to make the decision whether they lived or died. Putting my dog down was unnatural. It felt wrong, like I killed her. I moarned for days, crying at the drop of a hat. This is the first time I've talked about it, and now I'm crying .

So, you're not alone. Allow yourself to moarn and to feel this. I couldn't move for a week because I was in such a deep depression. My thoughts are with you.