Kids At Tastings, Yea Or Nea?

Decorating By LaBellaFlor Updated 16 Apr 2009 , 3:40pm by KitchenKat

LaBellaFlor Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 8:48pm
post #1 of 69

So, let me see if this makes sense, my husband's Goddaughter's Aunt is getting married, so she needs a tasting. No problem. But her niece (& there are actually two of them) are SO OUT OF CONTROL. They have no sense of how to interact with adults (they think they are equals & can be quite disrespectful) & poor impulse control. Don't get me wrong, I am fine with them, they know that THIS auntie loves them, but will bust they're butt if neccessary. Then I read on another post how she needs better picture albums, cause parents don't regulate their kids on how they handle her albums. So, both these things got me thinking, DO people bring kids to tastings sometimes? If they have that wild child thats jumping around, how do you handle it? I've been lucky so far, but not every one gets married before the baby (I know I didn't), and my stuff is in my house (yes, kitchens are legal in VA, so don't go there), I hate for kids to come through & destroy my toy room/kitchen (the den & kitchen are 1 big room). Just wanted to throw this out there & see what everyone thought.

68 replies
__Jamie__ Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:11pm
post #2 of 69

I allow two persons per tasting. So, bride and groom. Or bride and MOH, or bride and sister...I don't care, so bride and little sister or best friend for all that matters. I make it very very clear (sweetly of course) that no others are to accompany them. I have a very nice studio, it is not set up for entertaining children...or adults that get dragged along either.

So, for example, I have a tasting event coming up. 3 couples per appointment. That's 6 people. Will be comfortable, everyone there has a purpose, and no extra people to get in the way or put their hands on my things.

So if a kid is seriously one of the 2 for the appointment, fine. Sit down, act accordingly, don't get up and wander, eat your cake, and we'll all have a good time!

pipe-dreams Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:19pm
post #3 of 69

Being a mom in a new town, it can be tough to go anywhere without your kids. I have a 2 year old, and my hubby works long hours. I only know 2 people here, and they also work and have night school. So I am more lenient with it. I don't invite people to my home, I meet them downtown outside a coffee shop(there's a huge "park" with benches and table on the waterfront). Anyway, I had 1 person brings her hubby and 2 kids(this was in my home), and she didn't even let the kids taste anything. They were very well behaved. My last wedding tasting, I met at the coffee chop, and they brought their daughter. My hubby was outside with our daughter, so we all moved outside. That way the girls could play, and we could discuss things. They also just moved here and had noone to watch her.

I would not personally be upset or offended if you told me no kids...Just explain why. I'm sure they will understand, and if they don't, then you probably don't want their attitude(I mean business) anyway!

indydebi Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:30pm
post #4 of 69

When I send the email to confirm the appt, it includes language that says:

Since this appointment can be lengthy, we dont recommend bringing children as a catering facility is not a very entertaining place for them to try to sit quietly while mom/dad conduct a business meeting.

This message is dual-fold as it reinforces the idea that this is a BUSINESS meeting, not a Saturday afternoon tea where it doesn't matter if you show up or not. Once they get there, we have fun and a good time, but we are discussing BUSINESS!

dmhart Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:34pm
post #5 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by __Jamie__


So if a kid is seriously one of the 2 for the appointment, fine. Sit down, act accordingly, don't get up and wander, eat your cake, and we'll all have a good time!




I agree 100% icon_wink.gif

Ruth0209 Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:43pm
post #6 of 69

[...I would not personally be upset or offended if you told me no kids...Just explain why...[/quote]

Wow, do we really have to explain why it's not appropriate to bring children to an adult business meeting? That seems self-evident to me.

Janette Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:46pm
post #7 of 69

The world I grew up in kids were just that - kids. There were places for them and not for them. You did not take children to Wedding/Baby showers they did not go to a home party intended for adult women such as Tupperware. You did not drag your kids to an R movie because you wanted to go. If you had no one to watch your children you stayed home.

I never went to such places with my children. As much as you love your child and think they are just the cutest things on earth other people do not want to put up with them. And if you ask most likely they will feel that they have to say "bring them it's no problem" when really they are thinking please, leave your children at home, please.

Both my children's weddings were ruined because of screaming children that shouldn't have been there in the first place. No one heard my Son's vows because one of the groomsmen's child was screaming their head off.

I am very firm and will not budge when it comes to this issue. I gave my best friend a baby shower and put on the invatations "no children". It caused a stir but that was too bad.

I have several parties through the year and they are starting to get out of hand because people started bringing their children and their grandchildren. I spend the evening watching kids instead of enjoying my guest. I have to be careful what movies are put in they have to be PG my adult guest have to watch what they talk about. I now have to put on the invite "no children". I wish I didn't have to do that.

Just to add I do have children parties through the year also. Because I enjoy my friends children/grandchildren but at the right time/places.

Let's face it the kids think it's cool for the first 5 min then they are bored and start acting up. The parents start yelling at them when it's their fault for bringing them in the first place.

Why would anyone think to bring a child or a teenager for that matter to a cake tasting. I just don't know what goes through peoples heads.

bakery_chick Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:48pm
post #8 of 69

For my tastings, I offer each couple 4 cake samples. I make the same size samples if there are 2 or 7 people so it doesn't matter to me how many people they bring. Of course I only have 4 chairs so if you want to bring more it's SRO. I do have a small kids table with two more chairs and coloring books and crayons. If people bring the children, they usually let them sample then let them color while we discuss the cake.

newmansmom2004 Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:48pm
post #9 of 69

No kids. No way, no how. You'll be discussing specifics of the cake, the event, etc. The last thing you need is a mother trying to watch over the kids running around the shop while trying to have a comprehensive, thorough conversation about all the details of what she wants.

You don't need her coming back saying, "I told you pink flowers, not purple." And you clearly remember her saying "purple flowers" while she was telling Johnny to get his tongue off the glass on your display case!

Not appropriate.

Ruth0209 Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 9:49pm
post #10 of 69

Janette,
I agree 100%. I couldn't have said it better.

leah_s Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:00pm
post #11 of 69

No kids. Period. I get frosty.

Did I tell you about the time a bride showed up for her appointment? And brought her mom? And her MOH? And her sister? And the EIGHT kids from her home day care business?



Sent her packin'. She never got out of the foyer.

newmansmom2004 Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:01pm
post #12 of 69

[quote="Janette"]
Both my children's weddings were ruined because of screaming children that shouldn't have been there in the first place. No one heard my Son's vows because one of the groomsmen's child was screaming their head off.and their grandchildren. I spend the evening watching kids instead of Let's face it the kids think it's cool for the first 5 min then they are bored quote]

My own wedding was nearly ruined by the ring bearer! His father was best man and you'd think with the dad standing right there he would have kept the boy from trying to blow out the unity candle, the candles along the side of the altar, and jumping up and down because he was bored STIFF. Finally, after the minister intervened, the son was sent to sit with the mother in the pews.

I had a tasting a couple weekends ago with a teen (and her mom) but the party was for the teen - a BIG party - and I wanted her to be happy with the cupcakes she was going to have. She was a very polite 15 year old who was very mature and helpful. That's the exception.

newmansmom2004 Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:02pm
post #13 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by leahs

No kids. Period. I get frosty.

Did I tell you about the time a bride showed up for her appointment? And brought her mom? And her MOH? And her sister? And the EIGHT kids from her home day care business?

Sent her packin'. She never got out of the foyer.




Good for you - that's just free cake for everybody if you ask me and that's not what a tasting is all about. Some people just have no clue.

solascakes Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:07pm
post #14 of 69

I'm having a cake tasting soon,and i have specifically told my friends not to bring their kids.Now they can take any left overs home for them that's fine,but i need people to come and taste,analyse and discuss cakes and frostings,not just it's nice aunty can i have another piece.

dmhart Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:09pm
post #15 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth0209

Janette,
I agree 100%. I couldn't have said it better.




I couldn't agree more, I feel that children have a place and it isn't when doing business. I don't have a problem with children I have two of my own, but I wouldn't bring my to the tasting so I wouldn't want my customers to. If you have a child that knows how to act in an adult setting that is fine, but most tire of that quickly, and then the whining and misbehaving starts. And my nerves can't take the whining. It just best that the kids stay home.

Carolynlovescake Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:13pm
post #16 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth0209

Wow, do we really have to explain why it's not appropriate to bring children to an adult business meeting? That seems self-evident to me.




yes we do, pretty sad isn't it?

solascakes Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:13pm
post #17 of 69

Exactly dmhart,if you have kids that are well behaved i don't mind you bringing them.But have you noticed how most mother's feel their children are just the best icon_rolleyes.gif

dmhart Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:18pm
post #18 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by leahs

No kids. Period. I get frosty.

Did I tell you about the time a bride showed up for her appointment? And brought her mom? And her MOH? And her sister? And the EIGHT kids from her home day care business?



Sent her packin'. She never got out of the foyer.




OMG!!!!! I would have done the same thing Leah!! No Tasting Today or any day with brood. icon_twisted.gif

solascakes Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:27pm
post #19 of 69

L-E-A-H you evil evil woman. icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif

LaBellaFlor Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:37pm
post #20 of 69

Thanks everyone. There are some great suggestions on how to handle that situation. I thought about it when the other OP said kids were messing up her albums & I thought to myself "Why are the parents letting them do that?" & then it dawned on me, duh, some parents don't get it. I had kids at my wedding, but NOT THE CEREMONY. I hired a babysitter for the ceremony & they could come to the reception afterwards, cause I did not want to hear any crying or misbehaving child. I've seen that in so many different scenarios & parents not having the sense to remove the child. And I do have kids (can you tell from my avatar & 2 are actually missing from the pict. icon_wink.gif ) ,so its nothing personal, but I'm a pretty strict parent & I know some parents aren't. My motto "If you embaress me, we will be getting embaressed together!" Now what do I tell the mom who insist that they're 4 year old comes? Do I ask if we meet somewhere else? What if they get offended?

pipe-dreams Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 10:56pm
post #21 of 69

Yes, some parents thing they're kids are angels, even when they are the opposite! I simply said explain to them why they can't come, just so they don't think you are being rude, or that you dislike children.

If they get offended, just tell them about the photo album thing, and that you really don't have the space/means to accommodate a wandering child. I know parents are crazy over their kids, but I completely agree that a tasting is not the best place for them if they aren't well behaved. If you don't want to offend anyone, simply tell the customer that this is very serious to you, and you need to focus 100% to make sure all of the details are correct.
* Also, i know some people make a small cake and send it home with people. That way the customer doesn't have to make up thier mind right there. Not great if you want the sale that day, but just an idea. I don't personally do this, but many others have mentioned doing it.

varika Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 11:09pm
post #22 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by LaBellaFlor

Now what do I tell the mom who insist that they're 4 year old comes? Do I ask if we meet somewhere else? What if they get offended?




You say, "I'm sorry, but there are no exceptions." And if they get offended, you tell them, "I'm sorry I can't help you, then."

Jayde Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 11:19pm
post #23 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Janette

The world I grew up in kids were just that - kids. There were places for them and not for them. You did not take children to Wedding/Baby showers they did not go to a home party intended for adult women such as Tupperware. You did not drag your kids to an R movie because you wanted to go. If you had no one to watch your children you stayed home.




I agree totally! I threw a baby shower for a close friend of mine. I didnt put "No Children" on the invitation, but I wish I would have. 2 mutual friends brought their children, and while I was giving everyone a tour of my new house they opened ALL THE PRESENTS!!! icon_mad.gif I was sooo angry!

I have 2 children of my own and I even arranged for them and my hubby to be someplace else that day. The thing that absolutely killed me though was that both mothers, just kinda shrugged it off to kids will be kids. Ohh, my lord heaven help my children if they EVER did anything like that. They wouldnt be able to sit for a week!

mommyle Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 11:27pm
post #24 of 69

If she gives you flack, you say, "I don't know that this is an appropriate time for me to have a visit with the girls. I would love to have them over another day."

indydebi Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 11:27pm
post #25 of 69

jayde, I have a high tolerance for kids, but only those who have mothers who make them behave!!!! But I absolutely DETEST kids at a shower who think they have to "help" the bride or the mom open the gifts. And I detest even MORE the mom who sits backs and grins at the whole thing because she honestly believes everyone else thinks it's OH SO CUTE, TOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

aaaauuuugggghhhhhh!!!!!!

LaBellaFlor Posted 14 Apr 2009 , 11:28pm
post #26 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayde

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janette

The world I grew up in kids were just that - kids. There were places for them and not for them. You did not take children to Wedding/Baby showers they did not go to a home party intended for adult women such as Tupperware. You did not drag your kids to an R movie because you wanted to go. If you had no one to watch your children you stayed home.



I agree totally! I threw a baby shower for a close friend of mine. I didnt put "No Children" on the invitation, but I wish I would have. 2 mutual friends brought their children, and while I was giving everyone a tour of my new house they opened ALL THE PRESENTS!!! icon_mad.gif I was sooo angry!

I have 2 children of my own and I even arranged for them and my hubby to be someplace else that day. The thing that absolutely killed me though was that both mothers, just kinda shrugged it off to kids will be kids. Ohh, my lord heaven help my children if they EVER did anything like that. They wouldnt be able to sit for a week!


And that is what I'm talking about. My 1 & 2 year olds know how to clean up there toys & exactly where they go. I would hate for a kid to come through, tear up their play area & then not even clean it up. And I know parents would think that is a perfect set up for their kids while they taste cakes, NOT!

dmhart Posted 15 Apr 2009 , 12:04am
post #27 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

jayde, I have a high tolerance for kids, but only those who have mothers who make them behave!!!! But I absolutely DETEST kids at a shower who think they have to "help" the bride or the mom open the gifts. And I detest even MORE the mom who sits backs and grins at the whole thing because she honestly believes everyone else thinks it's OH SO CUTE, TOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

aaaauuuugggghhhhhh!!!!!!




Now that I think about it maybe it's the parents that unnerve me not the whining kids.

Jayde Posted 15 Apr 2009 , 12:07am
post #28 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

jayde, I have a high tolerance for kids, but only those who have mothers who make them behave!!!! But I absolutely DETEST kids at a shower who think they have to "help" the bride or the mom open the gifts. And I detest even MORE the mom who sits backs and grins at the whole thing because she honestly believes everyone else thinks it's OH SO CUTE, TOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

aaaauuuugggghhhhhh!!!!!!




I hate it too. In fact both kids were just at my son's 3rd birthday party. They started by handing him all of his presents. That magically got turned into, "Wow, Carter lookit what you got!" as they ripped open his prsents and held them up for him to see. icon_eek.gif The moms and dads said nothing, absolutely nothing. I did not get one picture of my son opening his presents without their heads in the way.

I love children, I just hate other people's children....

indydebi Posted 15 Apr 2009 , 12:16am
post #29 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayde

I did not get one picture of my son opening his presents without their heads in the way.



My first child's first birthday. Hubby's sister's son (oldest of the grandchildren) parks his butt right next to my daughter to make sure his face is in every picture. And in every picture, he's staring DIRECTLY into the camera. Like you, I have no pictures of MY child's first birthday that doesn't have this kid cheesing it up for the camera. And no, none of the adults thought there was anything wrong with that at all. After all, he was the first grandson .... the family golden boy.

I was one of 6 kids and we learned very early that "if it's not your birthday, you stay to the side. You'll get your turn in the limelight on YOUR birthday."

Deb_ Posted 15 Apr 2009 , 1:33am
post #30 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by dmhart

Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

jayde, I have a high tolerance for kids, but only those who have mothers who make them behave!!!! But I absolutely DETEST kids at a shower who think they have to "help" the bride or the mom open the gifts. And I detest even MORE the mom who sits backs and grins at the whole thing because she honestly believes everyone else thinks it's OH SO CUTE, TOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

aaaauuuugggghhhhhh!!!!!!



Now that I think about it maybe it's the parents that unnerve me not the whining kids.




Oh I agree it's the parents. Especially the ones who are afraid to discipline little Johnny of Jane because they want to be their friend not their parent! icon_mad.gif

LaBellaFlor.........I think what I would tell this woman is "Let me know when you've arranged for a sitter, so we can sit down and talk about your cake."

My business kitchen is in my basement, fortunately I have a walkout basement so I have a separate entrance from my main house. I bring them in through the basement right into my sitting area, we do the tasting and they leave. I don't allow anyone upstairs in my main house during the appt. (I even have a 1/2 bath down there just in case.)

I think that is one of the hardest things about working from home.......people assume it's OK to bring everyone along. icon_rolleyes.gif

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