How Do I Go On?

Decorating By barbaranoel Updated 18 Mar 2009 , 6:31pm by mashmellow

barbaranoel Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:25am
post #1 of 86

Yesterday morning I lost my best friend, my love and my life. My husband of 17yrs passed on.

After a very brief battle with Brain Cancer he died in the ER at Riverside hospital.

Everyone was so supportive when I first posted about his illness I just want to Thank everyone.

Now I have to figure out how to go on with 2 boys, 11 and 5 and help them while dealing with the loss of my best friend.


85 replies
veejaytx Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:43am
post #2 of 86

Oh, Barbara, I am so sorry! I wish I knew some magic words to help you and your family, but if there are any, I don't know them.

Please do know that I'll be thinking of you and praying for you to find the strength to take care of yourself and your boys.

My heart aches for you! Janice

miss_sweetstory Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:44am
post #3 of 86

I am so sorry. I know there aren't really any words that help. But please know that I will keep you and your dear family in my thoughts and prayers.


janine1972 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:51am
post #4 of 86

Hi Barbara

I am so sorry to hear of your loss, I know i dont know you, but i am thinking of you and your boys, will keep you all in prayer!!


sweet_T7 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:54am
post #5 of 86


I am so sorry for your loss. Love and support will come from your friends and family (including those here at CC)
I lost my husband in May and in fact, today is his birthday and also the day we met 24 years ago. Please know my heart is with you and your children and family.

There is a wonderful book called "For Widows Only" written by Annie (I forgot her last name!) but it is heartfelt and very healing to read when you are ready. She guides you through the various stages of your grief and answers so many questions and worries that I had. I really think you will find it very helpful.
God bless you and be with you as you go through this.
I am here for you Love, Donna

candynumber1 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 9:58am
post #6 of 86

My prayers are with you and your boys.Sorry for your loss.

Eliza Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:07am
post #7 of 86

Oh Barb, I am so sorry for your lost.

I wish I could give you a big hug, but know I will keep you and your boys in my thoughts and prayers.


marion123 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:13am
post #8 of 86

your in my thoughts and prayers...

plbennett_8 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:23am
post #9 of 86

Dear Barb,

You go on because you have two beautiful boys to teach and help grow into manhood... There is nothing that can make the next months any easier but faith and love. How do you go on? Fake it till you make it... One of the hardest things to do after such a heart wrenching lose is find joy, but that is what you have to do for yourself and your boys... Smile when it hurts, and eventually, without you even noticing it, the smile will become real... (((((Barb)))))

Pat B.

Ohara Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:38am
post #10 of 86

Barb, I am so sorry for you loss. I can't even imagine what you are going through. It just sucks! Just know that there are many of us who are praying for you/keeping a good thought for you and your boys.

Tona Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:40am
post #11 of 86

I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. I will pray for you and your children. Words can never express what is felt in times like these but know your CC friends are holding you up in prayer.

Rylan Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:40am
post #12 of 86

Barbara, I'm sorry for the loss. Just have the thought that he no longer has to go through all the physical pain. I'm sure he's in a better place now, and he'd be guiding your family through the years.

You should use this time to get a lot more closer with your two boys. Show them that you can do what daddy used to do. Take them out, it will also also give you a chance to take a deep breath. It's just a matter of time, Barb. You will have to move on eventually and I'm sure you wil. Give it a few weeks or months and it would be a lot easier. I know this is going to be a hard journey in life, but thats how life really is. Things pass by and all we have to do is continue with our lives. If you have troubles financially, there are other ways you can survive.

I hope you feel better soon. Talk to a close friend, family member and especially to your kids. I am hoping that you feel stronger. Remember, there is always light at the end of a tunnel.

mprout Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:43am
post #13 of 86

I lost my first husband 9yrs ago and the thing I remember most is how hard it was to breathe. It hurt so much to feel the air in my lungs. The heart ache is unreal, but I would take that breath and look at this little boy who needed me to be there for him. It does get better over the years just don't let the memory of him go for your children. They really need to know that it's okay to hurt and to talk about their dad. I pray God will hold your family and heal your hearts.
Love you

Bijoudelanuit Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:48am
post #14 of 86


I'm so terribly sorry to hear of your loss. My love and thoughts are with you and your family.

Jenn2179 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 10:51am
post #15 of 86

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I can't even imagine going throught this at such a young age with young children. Your boys will help you go on. They need you to help them learn what a wonderful man your husband was and you need to help them grow into men just like him.

mommicakes Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:17pm
post #16 of 86

OH Barb!!! I am so sorry to hear of your families loss. May god be with you and your boys. Sending my prayers and hugs to you.

kjt Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:34pm
post #17 of 86

Please know that you and your children will be in my thoughts and prayers.
May God comfort you and give you strength.

bethola Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:37pm
post #18 of 86

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Beth in KY

MemphisMom9801 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:43pm
post #19 of 86

I sit here and cry for you. I have 2 boys nearly the same ages and I just can't imagine how I would pick up and go on with them if I lost my husband. Please know that you are in everyone's thoughts and prayers during this very difficult time. May God grant you comfort and peace.

kakeladi Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:44pm
post #20 of 86

Over the past few months I have lifted you and your family up in prayer to a loving God who is holding you in His arms right now and will continue to. *HE* will never leave you! HE will give you the strength needed one minute at a time. Lean on Him. God has plans for you.......plans not to harm you but to give you love & strength.

jamiekwebb Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:48pm
post #21 of 86

Oh honey! I am so sorry. I will be praying for you and your boys. I don't know what to say other than you will be in my prayers and that I hope the Lord will strngthen you through this horrid time.

tanyascakes Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:48pm
post #22 of 86

Oh, Barb. I can't express how very sorry I am at the loss of your husband. You have 2 very special reasons to go on, your sns. You all be be healing to one another more than any words can say. Just know that you are in my prayers. God bless you all.

KKristy Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:52pm
post #23 of 86

I am so sorry...I can only imagine the pain that you are experiencing.

Those boys need you and you will find the inner strength that you need.
Try hard to keep it together for your family. Please post or contact any of us if you need a shoulder to cry on, advice or just to vent...we are all friends here in this cake community and are here for you when you need us.
You and your boys are in my thoughts, praying for your strength...

Kay_NL Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:52pm
post #24 of 86

I am so sorry to hear of your terrible loss. icon_sad.gif It is said that time heals all wounds, but most of us know that time never heals the loss of such an important person. Let your happy memories carry you forward. You are in my thoughts at this difficult time.

adunfag Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:54pm
post #25 of 86

Barb, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. You and your boys will be in my thoughts and prayers. Hold your boys tight, chearish those 17yrs and take as much time as you need to grieve. Hugs...

Cupcakeluv24 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:56pm
post #26 of 86

I am so very sorry for your loss. Your boys will keep you going give you strength when you are weak,remember to talk to them it will help you all heal. You and the boys are in my thoughts and prayer through this difficult time in your lives.

God Bless

BREN28 Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 12:57pm
post #27 of 86

i am so,so sorry to hear about your husband.tanyascakes is right, your two sweet boys are the reason you will find the strength to go on,and they will need your strength more than ever now. God be with you during this trying time,my thoughts and prayers are certainly with you and your boys.

mousey Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 1:00pm
post #28 of 86

May God be with you during this time and the days ahead. Hold tight to your boys, I am sure they will be your lifeline.

Praying for strength, comfort and peace that can only come from the good Lord above.

Psalms 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

Psalms 62:7 In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.


DFND Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 1:00pm
post #29 of 86

I'm so sorry for your loss. Words can not express my deepest sympathy.

sweetcravings Posted 11 Mar 2009 , 1:07pm
post #30 of 86

I don't believe we've ever talked but i just wanted you to know how sorry i am to hear of your loss. I can't even imagine what you are going through. Truely that would be my worse nightmare, to lose my husband. But i do know that one day his life, my life will come to an end and we will be welcomed by God and all those who have gone before us. I believe your husband is in a peaceful place and will always be around you. Many hugs.


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