"would You Like To Leave A Tip?"...

Decorating By cocobean Updated 8 Jan 2009 , 12:21am by newmansmom2004

cocobean Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 2:23am
post #1 of 30

Is it proper for a business to say, everytime you pay your bill, would you like to leave a tip? I know that I can leave a tip if I would like but when they ask me up front while I'm paying, it just rubs me the wrong way! I can't imagine saying to a customer, when they come to pick up a cake, would you like to leave a tip? (The business I'm talking about is the groomer I take my dog to). It makes me want to say, "no"! icon_evil.gif But of course I would feel really stupid if I did.

Anyone else feel awkward in this situation? What else could I say?

29 replies
Sweetcakes23 Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 2:29am
post #2 of 30

Yes, I think it sounds tacky... thumbsdown.gif

Malakin Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 2:35am
post #3 of 30

What else could you say? It is tacky of them to ask. You could always say, "I know I brought it but my dog ate it"...

SILVERCAT Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 2:48am
post #4 of 30

Do you take your dog to a groomer that does it on the side? I do and the first time I gave the lady a nice tip but than realized that the money she was charging me was for her. But yes that would bug me!

Melvira Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 2:53am
post #5 of 30

Ugh, yah, that is tacky. But they pretty much know how uncomfortable it is for you to say no, so they probably get a lot of tips that way.

It's like, I hate it when a cashier asks you if you want to donate a dollar (or however much) to end child abuse (or whatever else). I always donate my money to organizations that I feel personally connected to, and certainly not through the cashier at the local discount store. But I feel like I'm a real jerk when I say no.

KoryAK Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:01am
post #6 of 30

yes, super tacky. i would say maybe anonymously call or email a manager about it, just expressing kindly how it makes you feel. and you can let them know thta everyone agrees w you icon_smile.gif

melvira, i hate that too!! recently there was a sign at my safeway that says if they DONT ask for the $1 whatever then you get a free soda or something. that one really got me going but the next time i went that sign was taken down. guess im not the only one icon_smile.gif

Chippi Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:05am
post #7 of 30

I feel exactly like Mel on this one. Makes you wanna tip them 1 nickel! icon_biggrin.gif

indydebi Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:06am
post #8 of 30

First .... yes, I think it is not only tacky, but inappropriate.

Now .... Do you know if they ask this everytime, with every customer? Or was there a special circumstance? If customer is paying with cash, and cashier is curious on what kind of change to give (one $10 bill or two fives?), I can see them asking. However, the simple answer to that one is just give two five's and be done with it.

If customer is paying by credit card, there's no need to ask because the customer will add it to the credit slip when they sign it, if they wnat to leave one.

So even with my own examples of "special circumstances", I still don't see a need to ask this.

kakeladi Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:12am
post #9 of 30

.......customer is paying by credit card, there's no need to ask because the customer will add it to the credit slip when they sign it, if they wnat to leave one.......

Actually there is a chain buffet restaurant that we go to often who asks if we want to add cash back so we can leave a tip.

Melvira Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:20am
post #10 of 30

You know, I had to come back and give you a suggestion... the next time she/he says, "Do you want to leave a tip?" reply, "Do you want to lower your prices?" Hehehe. icon_rolleyes.gif

robinscakes Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:22am
post #11 of 30

I've found that waiters/waitresses/stylists/etc. usually say to me, "Do you need change?" when I pay in cash. Then I can say "no," or "just give me $5" back, or whatever. A lot nicer than the waiter/waitress saying "Would you like to leave a tip?" Ugh! That's tacky. Makes me want to say, "Well, no. I really wasn't planning on it."

indydebi Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:24am
post #12 of 30

kakeladi, sounds like they are processing it as debit card instead of a credit card? (not sure .... anyone, feel free to correct me). I'm assuming that because I dont' believe you can get cash back on a credit transaction .... only a debit transaction.

Debit transactions are low or zero cost for the business to process but they charge a fee to the cardholder. Credit transactions are no charge to the cardholder, but a fee is charged to the business. Which is why businesses would prefer to process it as a debit, and why cardholders prefer to process it as a credit (card).

My credit card processing company pretty much wanted me to badger my customers to let me run it as a debit card to lower my monthly fees. I can't really do that in my biz .... I dont' carry a processing machine with me and you need a PIN to process a debit ... no one is going to give me their credit card number AND their pin for me to process later when I get back to the shop! icon_eek.gif

Again, my disclaimer: This is how I understood the card processing to work, based on a short sales pitch from the credit card processing company, so if I've given any info that's incorrect, please correct me! thumbs_up.gif

babybundt Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:31am
post #13 of 30

you could always say " yes- my tip for today is look both ways before crossing the street" it is always tacky for someone to ask if you would like to leave a tip. ........laura

cocobean Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 3:52am
post #14 of 30

babybuddt, thats a good one!!! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif I'm not sure I could say, "yes-my tip for today is look both ways before crossing the street", with a straight face! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

I'm also thinking I should send an annonomus copy of all of these responses! icon_twisted.gif

Also, just so you know I always pay with a credit card.

-K8memphis Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 4:31am
post #15 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi



Debit transactions are low or zero cost for the business to process but they charge a fee to the cardholder. Credit transactions are no charge to the cardholder, but a fee is charged to the business. Which is why businesses would prefer to process it as a debit, and why cardholders prefer to process it as a credit (card).

Again, my disclaimer: This is how I understood the card processing to work, based on a short sales pitch from the credit card processing company, so if I've given any info that's incorrect, please correct me! thumbs_up.gif




Quote:
Originally Posted by kakeladi

Actually there is a chain buffet restaurant that we go to often who asks if we want to add cash back so we can leave a tip.




Lynne, This place is screwed up. A restaurant that gives cash back? Are you using a pin? I didn't think they set restaurants up to give back cash.

See when I had the tea-room I used the antique malls credit card processing at first and since I learned so quickly how unsavory the %$@# antique mall owners were I never got my own system. And of course there was no tip service on ther processing thing. So we would briefly explain that to customers and so shoot me. I agree it's tacky but...

But Lynne, if they are giving you over on a transaction where you are not using a pin--they are cooking their books.

And if someone wants to leave a tip in a concluding, separate transaction it all has to be programmed into the merchant account and into the software and hardware.

So haven't you ever been in a beauty salon where they only take cash tips? Because it costs (the merchant) more to have the tips added on after the original swipe.

Debi, it costs everybody every which way to process everything. Some merchants are literally raped by their processors. I would have folks to whom english was not their first language be just totally effed by the salespeople. (I used to work in credit card processing.) There's a thousand variables between every merchant--volume, credit score, dollar amount, longevity with the processor, what they roped you into in the first place etc. It's all by contract. I mean especially restaurants who wanna add tips.

I mean yeah there's paypal & stuff...but like I mean swipe machines & registers & stuff

mixinvixen Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 5:00am
post #16 of 30

i worked for several years training servers and showing them the ropes. the first thing i taught them was to NEVER ask the customer if they needed change back. the customer has chosen to spend their time and money in this restaurant/venue, and certainly doesn't need to be guilted for even one second. when someone hands a server money, that server needs to say "i'll be back in a moment with your change". if they don't want change, they'll say so. another gripe i have is when someone dumps my money back into my hand without counting it back out to me first!!!!!!!!! ugh!!!!!!!!!!

gleep Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 9:13pm
post #17 of 30

We have a restaurant here that does what kakeladi is talking about. You pay up front because it's a buffet so they ask if you want cash for a tip if you pay with a credit card. If you say yes, they add the tip amount to your total and give the tip amount to you in cash so you will have it for your server. This way their servers still get tips even though they don't get to run the checks for their tables. Perfectly legal and a good way for the restaurant to handle it so their servers are taken care of.

superstar Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 10:45pm
post #18 of 30

I firmly believe that you give a tip because you have had good service, too many servers have the mistaken idea that they deserve a tip whether they give good service or not. That doesn't go down with me at all & if anyone asked if I wanted to leave a tip...my hackles would be up & I would definitely answer, no.....but thank you for asking!!!!!

summernoelle Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:02pm
post #19 of 30

Yep, tacky.
Tips are not required. And it is very rude to ask. Don't know if anyone else said this, but "tip" means:
To
Insure
Promptness

So, if the service sucks, then no, you don't have to (I usually still do, but just lower it to 10-15%) When it's good, they get 20-25%.

JMO!

Getus Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:03pm
post #20 of 30

Would you like to leave a tip?

Uh....

"No, not this time, thank you". would SO be my response to that very bold and tacky question.
This is exactly what I say when a cashier asks if I'd like to donate $1 for ____ cause.

These are all simply ploys to make you feel "guilted" into doing/giving whatever it is they are asking for. It's a form of bullying, imho.

I am a tipper, and a very generous one, if my service was good...but...with that said....I will make the decision if/when/how much to tip.

leaisagary Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:09pm
post #21 of 30

I definitly think its rude for the groomer to ask if you want to leave a tip, my groomer does that and i hate it, I dont compare it to a waitress though because waitresses only make 2.15 per hour and thier income is based soley on tips ( I say soley because 2 or 3 dollers per hour usually goes straight to taxes. ) a groomer gets paid an hourly wage or at least most of them do. I think its more optioal to tip a groomer then a waitress, the service at a resturant would have to be absolutly terrible for me not to leave a tip. I dont think its rude to ask customers if they need change back at a resturant, its just common sence so that you dont have to take extra time to count the money just fro them to hand it back to you and meanwhile you have 5 other tables your waiting on, and it is not the same as asking if they want to leave a tip in my opinion. I guess the groomer mught have to ask if you can only leave a tip before the transaction has been placed because then they would be shorting themselves when the person wants to leave a tip but cant because they didnt know about how the transactions are processed at that particular store but other then that I do feel that its rude.

KathyTW Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:23pm
post #22 of 30

My two cents.....

1. Once went to a local restaurant for meeting after dinner - ordered dessert and coffee total bill $7.50ish, gave waitress $10 bill - she came to retreive the little booklet that holds the bill/cc/money and she opened it and as she was walking away said "thank you" - never saw her again - she kept the $2.50 as a tip without even asking. Normally I probably would have asked for a manager or something but since one of my daughter's works at this resort I didn't want to make trouble for her.

2. Our "tipping" system sucks. It is supposed to be a jester of appreciation for good service received....now-a-days it's expected and in some establishments if you have more than 4 in your group they automatically at the tip to the bill...this sometimes leads to a lower quality of service. BUT, one of the biggest problems is that the gov. requires restaurant workers to add a certain percentage to their income amount onto their taxes - whether they make that amount or not!!! And at alot of restaurants the servers have to share tips with the bussers, cooks, hostess, etc. If I want the cook to have a tip - I'll give it to him/her.

We need to get back to "I'LL TIP WHAT I WANT TO, WHEN I WANT TO!!!"

terrig007 Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:27pm
post #23 of 30

This past Saturday my husband and I went out and on the way to the restuarant we passed a sweet shop where he said he wanted to go after dinner. Right at the register there is a giant old pickle jar with three signs saying "We love tips!", "Tips are Great" and "Tips are wonderful!". He left a darn tip and I was so mad. She also had a sign on the way out that read "Did you remember to leave a tip?". Never again will I go to that place again. BTW the fudge he bought was terrible.

leaisagary Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:33pm
post #24 of 30

I agree that our tipping system sucks, I waitressed for what seemed like forever! I think if a resturant dosent want their servers to imply anything about tipping then they should fork out a higher hourly rate and that goes for all tipped positions dang it! lol

MacsMom Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:43pm
post #25 of 30

I waitressed and bartended for years, myself. One thing that is appreciated is if, when paying by credit card, leave a cash tip if you have it and then write -CASH- on the line where it says "tip amount".

Where I worked I made a lot more in tips than my paycheck, so no complaints there.

And yes, I always taught my co-workers to just make change rather than asking if the customer needs it - sometimes they even leave another buck.

I also found that I made more in tips the better groomed I was! Ironed, not faded, neat hair, clean apron...

scoutmamma Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:46pm
post #26 of 30

I am with you guys on the tip thing! if the waitstaff was good and attentive, i will tip WAYYY over what is the standard, but if they dont,.... well, they shouldnt rely on the kindness of strangers. i know it is mean, but... honest. when i trained new waitstaff at a chain of restraunts, i suggested they not say "Do you need change?" as that assumes you are giving them the remainder... but to say "I will be right back with your change!" and most of the time they said, "No, keep the change." My father always said, "Ya know what happens when you ASS ume?" if anyoone doesnt know what i am talking about, pm me and i will fill ya in. thumbs_up.gif

summernoelle Posted 7 Jan 2009 , 11:53pm
post #27 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathyTW

My two cents.....

1. Once went to a local restaurant for meeting after dinner - ordered dessert and coffee total bill $7.50ish, gave waitress $10 bill - she came to retreive the little booklet that holds the bill/cc/money and she opened it and as she was walking away said "thank you" - never saw her again - she kept the $2.50 as a tip without even asking. Normally I probably would have asked for a manager or something but since one of my daughter's works at this resort I didn't want to make trouble for her.




I had someone do this once-where she didn't give us correct change. It ended up being very little that she kept (like 75 cents or something) but it pissed me off so much, that's what she got for her tip. I would have given her about $5-but hey, not my problem. icon_mad.gif

Rachael1013 Posted 8 Jan 2009 , 12:06am
post #28 of 30

Along with what k8memphis said - some places can't go back and add on the tip. The cafe in the building where I work can't accept credit card tips written on the slip unless you want to have them swipe your card again. So they just have a little tip jar next to their register.

Yes, it does seem tacky, but sometimes there's extenuating circumstances. I'd left a tip on several slips at this particular cafe and never knew they weren't actually getting their tips until I overheard the normal cashier explaining it to a new employee. I felt really bad! I'd rather them just explain it and get it over with than not get what they should have. JMHO

leaisagary Posted 8 Jan 2009 , 12:10am
post #29 of 30

yes that is extremly rude and I also have ahd that happen to me, where the waitress takes a little extra? and I also believe not to assume anything but I guess I dont see how asking if they need change is assuming. I dont read too much into the server when I eat out I know shes busy and doing her best to please everyone I know I did when I served I never felt that I was rude.

newmansmom2004 Posted 8 Jan 2009 , 12:21am
post #30 of 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by cocobean

Is it proper for a business to say, everytime you pay your bill, would you like to leave a tip? I know that I can leave a tip if I would like but when they ask me up front while I'm paying, it just rubs me the wrong way! I can't imagine saying to a customer, when they come to pick up a cake, would you like to leave a tip? (The business I'm talking about is the groomer I take my dog to). It makes me want to say, "no"! icon_evil.gif But of course I would feel really stupid if I did.

Anyone else feel awkward in this situation? What else could I say?




If you know you'll continue using the groomer, I would present them at Christmas with a gift card or some cash if you want, and let them know you appreciate their business throughout the year. That way you won't feel obligated to leave a tip every time you use them and maybe they'll figure out that at the end of the year - if they continue providing quality service - they'll get their "tip".

And yes, I think it's tacky for them to ask.

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