Is The New Fad For Weddings !!

Business By cakesondemand Updated 11 Sep 2008 , 6:33pm by sweettoothmom

cakesondemand Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 8:41pm
post #1 of 102

just doing cutting cakes for the bride and groom I have had so many request for this and I'm wondering if everyone else has. I have now put a minium on wedding cake orders.

101 replies
acookieobsession Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 10:01pm
post #2 of 102

So what dessert are they serving the guests?

Sometimes people do the strangest things. I have a girl with an A and B guest list. Once an A person declines they send out an invite to the B list person. I see the point but lord help them if anyone ever heard they were on the B list!


Julia

indydebi Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 10:06pm
post #3 of 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by acookieobsession

So what dessert are they serving the guests?


THat's my question, too!

leah_s Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 10:40pm
post #4 of 102

A and B lists are actually quite common.

acookieobsession Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 11:07pm
post #5 of 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by leahs

A and B lists are actually quite common.




Really?!?

I wonder what the B list people would think....that really goes against my deep south background I guess. I do understand the need to limit the list though...it would be a hard call for me I think.

Perhaps they serve the other guests a regular dessert buffet or a kitchen cake?

Julia

PinkZiab Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 11:44pm
post #6 of 102

Unfortunately, A & B lists are very common (visit a site like the Knot or wedding channel and you'll see), but I still think they're tacky and in plain English: F***ed up! People have so lost sight of what weddings are supposed to be about.

indydebi Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 11:48pm
post #7 of 102

Edith Gilbert, author of several wedding etiquette books and writes a column for the Washington Post, "is not happy" with the A-list-B-list trend that has recently surfaced. However, Emily Post says it is fine to have a B list, but suggests "B" list invites be mailed no later than 4 weeks prior to the wedding.

sweettoothmom Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 12:43am
post #8 of 102

Where are these peoples manners?
Emily Post is right on having a B list for INVITATIONS. If your A list does not show an adequate number of RSVP's then you can send out invites to the B list. That is not a big deal but to have an A and B list for dessert?! Now that is just an absolute slap in the face to any guest. And what a nightmare for the caterers. Make one dessert and serve it to everyone who attends. How very tacky on the brides part. Seems very snootie.


As a guest so I try and find out what list I was on and then decide if the couple gets an A or B list gift from me? I say YES SIREEE BOB! Mikasa Crystal on gift registry or tupperware bowl from under my sink?

MicahS Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 12:57am
post #9 of 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by acookieobsession

So what dessert are they serving the guests?



Julia




I have had several orders like this recently. Some have served out SAMs club sheet cakes (much cheaper than mine), some have done other dessert options. My last cake order accompanied a Sundae bar.

Ruth0209 Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:07am
post #10 of 102

I recently did a small cake for a couple that just wanted a cake for decoration and to cut, but they wouldn't' serve it to anyone. If I had been a guest I would have wondered, "WHAT THE HECK?" I dress up, drive 50 miles, buy a nice gift, hang out at the reception and all I get is a lousy slice of sheet cake from Costco? It just makes the bride and groom look cheap and like they packed the reception hall just to get a gift.

My take is, DON'T INVITE MORE PEOPLE THAN YOU CAN HAVE A NICE RECEPTION FOR.

Tona Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:08am
post #11 of 102

I have not had this request in my area as of yet. I do not agreee with the A/B List and I can not see serving guest different this really would be a nightmare for the caters

BitsnBites Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:13am
post #12 of 102

Where I'm from, there isn't even a cut cake. The couple would get a wedding cake and cut it and serve it but it was a lot of waste. So it just went out of fashion. Now it is considered tacky.

What they serve for dessert is a regular dessert that you get at a restaurant. But a really nice, expensive dessert. They are included with the meal at the venue. And it's usually a different dessert for men and another kind for women. Women get like a fruit tart, or poached pear with some sorbet, something "lighter" and men get chocolate mousse or cheesecake, something "fattening". Of course people always end up trading. Or in my case, eating mine and my husbands icon_biggrin.gif

indydebi Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:21am
post #13 of 102

meegh, where in the world are you from?? icon_confused.gif

terrig007 Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:21am
post #14 of 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth0209

I recently did a small cake for a couple that just wanted a cake for decoration and to cut, but they wouldn't' serve it to anyone. If I had been a guest I would have wondered, "WHAT THE HECK?" I dress up, drive 50 miles, buy a nice gift, hang out at the reception and all I get is a lousy slice of sheet cake from Costco? It just makes the bride and groom look cheap and like they packed the reception hall just to get a gift.

My take is, DON'T INVITE MORE PEOPLE THAN YOU CAN HAVE A NICE RECEPTION FOR.




About 22 years ago my cousin had a cake just for the head table and the rest of us got Little Debbie's Brownies with those ice cream cups with wooden sticks on it. The wedding was in MO and we all came from IN and IL. I would have been thrilled with a sheet cake from Costco.
As for the A & B list, well I have been on the "B" list and I was not pleased at all. It was someone my husband worked with in the Army. He kept coming home asking if we had received an invite to this girl's wedding. Well 10 days before the wedding it showed up and the RSVP was a phone call. So, I call and we go to the wedding and she asks my husband if she could borrow his sword to cut the cake and he lets her and we're sitting there and this one guy at the table says something about this being the "reject table" and we're all like what? He said that he found out about it through a friend of his. I found out that night that was indeed true. It really was not a good feeling.
Wonder if the Happy Couple of the OP will even send out "Thank You" notes? My folks are still waiting 22 years for theirs. icon_lol.gif

Parable Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:22am
post #15 of 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by meegh

Where I'm from, there isn't even a cut cake. The couple would get a wedding cake and cut it and serve it but it was a lot of waste. So it just went out of fashion. Now it is considered tacky.

What they serve for dessert is a regular dessert that you get at a restaurant. But a really nice, expensive dessert. They are included with the meal at the venue. And it's usually a different dessert for men and another kind for women. Women get like a fruit tart, or poached pear with some sorbet, something "lighter" and men get chocolate mousse or cheesecake, something "fattening". Of course people always end up trading. Or in my case, eating mine and my husbands icon_biggrin.gif




Wher are you from? These traditions sound so foreign to me. Just curious.

Ruth0209 Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:22am
post #16 of 102

Meegh, where are you located? Really? It's tacky to serve the cake? I don't think I'd like that tradition.

I have seen nice desserts served with sit-down dinners. That's an interesting practice to serve the women and men different desserts. The men's desserts sound better to me than a poached pear!! At my house, fruit doesn't have to count as dessert!!

indydebi Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:24am
post #17 of 102

these stories need to be added to www.etiquettehell.com !
icon_lol.gif They would fit in beautifully!!

(My favorite is the guest who was in a car crash on the way to the wedding, was life-lined to the hospital. The bride calls her a few days later and tells her that was no excuse for missing her wedding and by way, she still owed the bride a present! icon_surprised.gif )

acookieobsession Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:32am
post #18 of 102

pear or cheesecake...my dh would be eatin a pear when he noticed his empty cheesecake plate!
MMmm...

tamrick Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:36am
post #19 of 102

Too funny acookieobsession, mine too!

BitsnBites Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:46am
post #20 of 102

I'm from the city of San Pedro. It is in Nuevo Leon, Mexico. It borders with TX. I don't know about wedding cake traditions in ALL Nuevo Leon, but at least in my city that's the way its done. That's the way my sister's and friends' wedding were, and that's the way my wedding was.

In all fairness, cakes aren't as elaborated back home. I had never seen a cake with fondant until I moved to Toronto. And people back home who had tasted cake with fondant they all seemed to dislike the taste. I guess we just aren't used to it.

But from the cakes I've seen here, I think it's a shame that people don't get a wedding cake. And I think it's time the wedding cake made a comeback. thumbs_up.gif

robinscakes Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:47am
post #21 of 102

I'm doing a lot of cutting cakes, but they're also ordering cupcakes. I haven't done only a cutting cake. Usually my cutting cakes are pretty cheap when they order cupcakes--just $15-$20 for a little 6 inch minimally decorated cake. Kind of a little bonus when you order the cupcakes. I've never heard of it being tacky to serve the cake to the guests. I'm guessing that's not an American thing, but then again, I don't get out much!

leah_s Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 6:40am
post #22 of 102

If they're just ordering a cutting cake, then odds are they are getting sheet cakes from a big box store. To protect your reputation you should run like the wind from such an order. Most cake designers/bakers have a "sole provider" clause in their contracts. It's been discussed many times here on CC.

Once the guests look at the beautiful cake you provide and ask "who did the cake?" and your name gets circulated, then they get a piece of obvious sheet cake that's of inferior quality, your reputation is gone.

Cakechick123 Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 1:49pm
post #23 of 102

in South Africa cake is not considered to be part of the dessert. Most venues supply a dessert table that is included in their price, so lots of brides opts for mini cakes/cup cakes with the small cutting cake on top so they can still have their cutting photo and then the guests can take the mini/cc home. Alternatively if they want a big cake I normally suggest for only 60% of their guest list. This way they dont have too much left over!

leah_s Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:07pm
post #24 of 102

My above statements apply to U.S. weddings only. icon_smile.gif

michellenj Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:12pm
post #25 of 102

I'd be really annoyed if dh got a nice piece of cheesecake or chocolate mousse and I got fruit!

Katie-Bug Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:21pm
post #26 of 102

That's me, I'd be ticked if I had to eat fruit while he got something sinful like chocolate.
icon_eek.gif


Lucky for me, he doesn't like chocolate! icon_razz.gif And, I like a good poached pear...so both for me!!! thumbs_up.gif

leannsloan Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:27pm
post #27 of 102

I just had a bride talk to me about a small cake and then sheet cakes to cut. when she called back she ordered the small tier then ordered the sheet cakes from some other place. I also had a mother of the bride ask if I would do a dummy wedding cake they wanted to go cheaper so they ordered sheet cakes at sams and wants me to do the wedding dummy cake and to thinks she thinks this is cheaper.

mommyle Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:31pm
post #28 of 102

Boy desserts and girl desserts... now THAT is totally f***d up!!!! I think I've just about heard it all! I would be totally PEEVED (with capital I's) if I got a stupid pear and my DH got a yummy cheesecake!!!!!

And now I know that if I get an invitation anything less than 6 weeks away from a wedding that I was "B" listed, and just might be inclined to say "Go jump off a cliff".

Unless it's really good friends we normally don't go anyway. We have them over for supper after the honeymoon. But we don't like spending an evening smoozing people we don't normally hang with anyway, and with the number of guests at an average wedding being 130, we don't get to hang out with the BandG anyway, so why bother?

tracycakes Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:40pm
post #29 of 102

I'm just amazed reading these posts! icon_eek.gif Brides complain about paying $3 or $4 for a serving of cake but how much are they spendingo on these other desserts.

My hubby flipped on Bridezillas yesterday just as a bride was saying "We're outta here! I'm not spending $500 on a CAKE!". Yeah, and she probably spent over $5000 on her dress. I just almost couldn't stand listening to this show. One bride's 5 year old nephew went missing right before the reception started and the bride was just ticked and ready to leave because all of the focus wasn't on her.

The arrogance of some people.....

Ladybug6509 Posted 2 Sep 2008 , 2:42pm
post #30 of 102

The hispanic cultures thinks it is tacky to serve cake at a wedding. At least that is what I was taught with Weddings Beautiful.

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