Depressed, Need A Hug And Prayers

Lounge By Karema Updated 19 Sep 2008 , 10:55pm by littlecake

Karema Posted 17 Aug 2008 , 10:37pm
post #1 of 24

I've been so down lately. I'm a SAHM and my husband and I have been in debt for a while. Then two months ago he lost his job and we had no savings. He decided to take a job selling insurance and went to albany for three weeks for training without pay. This sent us further into debt. Then he started work and he is just doing ok. He is making ok money but we cant seem to catch up on the bills we couldnt pay while he was out of work.

I've been praying but I'm getting scared. We are two months behind on rent, carnote, car insurance, phone, and cable. My cell phone just got cut off and cable is on the way out. I'm stressed and cant figure out how to even get orders to make a few extra dollars. I'm just so upset. I have to by diapers for my son today and cant seem to figure out where to get the money from. Please keep us in prayers. We are stressed, discouraged, and afraid. Thanks for letting me vent.

23 replies
seasonsmoke Posted 17 Aug 2008 , 11:13pm
post #2 of 24

Sham,

Thank you for sharing your story. I hope and pray that things will improve for you and your family. My husband was laid off for two months this year. He is working as a temp now for little pay. So I understand where you are coming from. While my husband was on lay off I got almost no cake orders to help things. I hope you have better luck with getting in orders.
Keep the faith.

tracycakes Posted 18 Aug 2008 , 12:01am
post #3 of 24

I'm so sorry that you are struggling so much right now. Just remember, God knows what you need and He will provide. I'm praying for you and your family.

PiccoloChellie Posted 18 Aug 2008 , 6:41am
post #4 of 24

If you're a member of a church, go speak with your Priest or Pastor. Most churches are able to give money towards rent/bills/food/etc to those in need, and often other essentials like diapers or feminine products. If you're not a member of a church, speak with churches in your town. Many are happy to help anyone in a tough situation even if you're not a member.

Call your city/town general information line and ask about assistance programs. If your children are young enough you may qualify for WIC, but there are also temporary/short term and emergency assistance programs out there. This is why we pay taxes, so don't feel like you'd be getting a "handout" or that you're "sponging." Explain your situation and they should be able to guide you to the departments or programs that can help you.

Speak to your debtors and explain the situation. Many will work with you on a payment plan to keep your utilities and services on.

See if there's an Angel Food Ministries branch in your area. You can get a large box of food once a month for $30 (you can buy multiple boxes). This organization buys food in bulk quantities and passes the savings on to you; it's not a charity, per se, it's more of a co-op. The food is distributed through churches, but you don't have to be Christian to benefit. It's for everyone.

There is help out there, so don't despair!! Take the help you can get to keep you and your family healthy and sane, because that's what's important!

Texas_Rose Posted 18 Aug 2008 , 7:36am
post #5 of 24

Can you look on this page http://www.otda.state.ny.us/main/programs.asp and see if there's anything there that can help you? There's a part of the Temporary Assistance program that covers emergencies and you don't have to be eligible for ongoing TANF to be eligible for the emergency help. That sounds like what you might need, because one thing they will do is pay your late rent if you're in danger of being evicted, which it sounds like you might be soon.

Also, you can post on your local Craigslist asking for diapers...you know how kids will sometimes outgrow them before you finish off a pack, or a kid can be allergic to a particular brand, and the only way to tell is to try them...anyhow, it's possible that another mom in your area will have some diapers they don't need. You can also try trading for them, or selling some of your outgrown baby stuff, or other stuff. It doesn't cost anything to post on Craigslist. There've been months that I've kept us from being penniless by selling stuff on craigslist. Another thing you could do is advertise as a babysitter on craigslist...don't start providing home daycare unless you check the laws in your area, but babysitting now and then is a good way to pick up a little cash. You probably have your house all babyproofed already anyhow icon_biggrin.gif

Angel Food ministries has 85 host sites in New York, so there's probably one close to you. Here's their website with the menus and order dates http://www.angelfoodministries.com/ I haven't tried them yet, but I have a friend who orders from them every month.

Don't feel embarrassed about looking for the help that you need...I bet you and your husband have paid lots of taxes over the years, so all you'd be doing is getting back some of what you've paid in.

VannaD Posted 18 Aug 2008 , 3:46pm
post #6 of 24

I too was going to suggest angelfoodministries.com my mom just told me about it last week. Texas Rose is right about craigslist you can buy, sell, and ask from people in your area, and its free! Everyone here has given you great advice, i hope these hard times pass soon.

SS385Monte Posted 18 Aug 2008 , 4:46pm
post #7 of 24

With school getting ready to start back up could you look into being a substitute teacher? I looked into it a couple of years ago and I think it was close to $100 a day in my area (not quite, but close). If you could find a way to do just one day a week you would still be able to be home most days, but still have extra money. Good luck!

tktexasgirl Posted 19 Aug 2008 , 12:43am
post #8 of 24

I will also keep you and your family in prayer. I went thru a really big trial about 6 years ago. I was in the middle of a divorce, lost my job, thought I had cancer which ended up with me not being able to have children (but not cancer) and was in debt and most of that had gone into collections. I was jobless for almost 2 years and did not know how I would make it, but God got me thru it and now, I have cleared most of my debt, I am married to a wonderful man, I have 2 beautiful children thru him (tech step children), have a job that I have had for almost 4 years, and best of all a church home that is the best. I know that God will provide, and I will pray that he will lead yall thru this.

Karema Posted 20 Aug 2008 , 1:22pm
post #9 of 24

Thank you all for you kind words and prayers. I've decided to just leave it to God because I can't change anything. I'm going to start selling my cookies at the flea market again next week so hopefully I make some money. My husband came home yesterday and he really didnt make any money but he did get some gas cards from his company worth $90. So now we dont have to put gas in the car for a week or so. That was a blessing.

Thanks all for your suggestions on how to get food and I will definantly keep that in mind. We do have foo because I went and got foodstamps. That is really a help. I just have to figure out how to get my daughter school clothes, shoes and a bookbag. I am still praying. Thanks for listening to me.

sugarshane Posted 21 Aug 2008 , 10:03pm
post #10 of 24

I am a teacher, and at my district we have a fund set up to help "our people"meaning students and their families, and staff who are in need. The teachers donate a days pay to create the funds and people in need apply for assistance. Check with your school offoce to see if there is something similar at your school. I bet there is.

KKC Posted 21 Aug 2008 , 11:02pm
post #11 of 24

I'm sorry your going through this. I'll be praying for you and your family. Don't let your faith in God waiver...he'll never put more on you than you can bare!

Monkess Posted 9 Sep 2008 , 1:14pm
post #12 of 24

"God has a plan for me and that is all I need to know".....I have said this to myself over the years and in hindsight in my toughest moments, He has always done what He wanted and it has ALWAYS turned out to be for the best. But you have to leave it upto Him and not cheat by worrying. God bless you and your family.

gibson Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 5:36pm
post #13 of 24

I like the saying "God helps those who help themselves"

I don't mean to stir up the pot but was taken back when I read the comment "I've decided to leave it to God because I can't change anything". So you are going to sit back and hope that God puts some food on your table or diapers on your baby? Sometimes you have to do something yourself. JMHO.

-K8memphis Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 6:40pm
post #14 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by gibson

I like the saying "God helps those who help themselves"

I don't mean to stir up the pot but was taken back when I read the comment "I've decided to leave it to God because I can't change anything". So you are going to sit back and hope that God puts some food on your table or diapers on your baby? Sometimes you have to do something yourself. JMHO.




I gently and kindly agree.

I hope you find some great solutions soon.

Mac Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 7:06pm
post #15 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by gibson

I like the saying "God helps those who help themselves"

I don't mean to stir up the pot but was taken back when I read the comment "I've decided to leave it to God because I can't change anything". So you are going to sit back and hope that God puts some food on your table or diapers on your baby? Sometimes you have to do something yourself. JMHO.




I am sure she didn't mean that she was just going to sit back and do nothing. She has put her situation and faith in God to show her the way. And actually God does not JUST help those that help themselves--He helps everyone! We just have to put our faith and trust in Him. When we put our trust in Him, He gives us strength. And that strength gives us the ability to help ourselves. So we must FIRST give it to God!

Amia Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 7:16pm
post #16 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mac

Quote:
Originally Posted by gibson

I like the saying "God helps those who help themselves"

I don't mean to stir up the pot but was taken back when I read the comment "I've decided to leave it to God because I can't change anything". So you are going to sit back and hope that God puts some food on your table or diapers on your baby? Sometimes you have to do something yourself. JMHO.



I am sure she didn't mean that she was just going to sit back and do nothing. She has put her situation and faith in God to show her the way. And actually God does not JUST help those that help themselves--He helps everyone! We just have to put our faith and trust in Him. When we put our trust in Him, He gives us strength. And that strength gives us the ability to help ourselves. So we must FIRST give it to God!




I agree. That statement was followed by her saying she was going to sell cookies and she received gas cards and foodstamps. Leaving it to God has obviously helped.

Karema, I hope things are looking up for you. You're in my prayers. I know how hard it can be, I have two babies myself. icon_smile.gif If you still need clothing and a book bag for your daughter, PM me.

gibson Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 7:26pm
post #17 of 24

Okay, I didn't ask for a preaching. I am not a religious person, my mom used to tell us that all the time if we were being lazy etc. The way she has it posted it sounds like she's going to sit back and do nothing. You also have to take responsiblity for yourself and your family. Please respect that people don't appreciate a lot of religious talk on a non-religious board.

Mac Posted 13 Sep 2008 , 9:31pm
post #18 of 24

May I remind you that you were the one that brought God up first.

gibson Posted 14 Sep 2008 , 4:56pm
post #19 of 24

Read the posts again!

Mac Posted 14 Sep 2008 , 6:10pm
post #20 of 24

I meant that you were the one that brought God up to her as you felt the need to criticize her. So technically, YOU were preaching to her. We all get on CC and ask for support and prayers and just generally vent about our situations at one time or another and ultimately there is one person that seems to feel that it is their need to point out the "problems". And then complains when someone else makes a comment that does not agree with them.

Sorry, but the OP just asked for support and prayers...and then you dissed her on turning it over to God. JMHO!

gibson Posted 14 Sep 2008 , 6:57pm
post #21 of 24

I'm not getting into this as it has to do with religion. I referred to religion as every other poster did. It was a quote my mom used to tell us as I mentioned before and my family is not religious. I was trying to make a point that YOU have the power to change things! You have the power to help yourself, don't rely on anyone else to do it for you. I do hope things get better for the OP. I believe in being proactive not believing somebody/something else will do it for me! That's how her post read to me. I hope she sells lots of cookies and can afford diapers for her kid(s). I also am glad she has asked for food stamps etc, again I don't think relying on food stamps etc is a good thing. I think in a time of need absolutely use them , that's what they are there for, don't rely on them. I wish only the best for the OP and her situation. All I'm saying is have all avenues been explored? What about getting a night job when hubbie is at home so he can watch the kids? It would be tough but you have to do these things sometimes. I know all about not affording stuff. I worked 2 sometimes 3 jobs averaging 3 hours sleep at night but I did it and I got through it and if I had to do it again I would. I just don't think sitting back and watching it go from bad to worse is a good thing. So to the original poster: I wish you and your family all the best!

Wesha Posted 19 Sep 2008 , 1:42am
post #22 of 24

Karema,

Leave it up to God and continue to pray and he shall deliver. He does not put so much on us that we can carry. I hope things get better for you and your family real soon.

lardbutt Posted 19 Sep 2008 , 3:16am
post #23 of 24

I have personally experienced God putting food on my table and diapers on my kids. I do hope things have gotton better for the OP. I have been thinking of you and your family.

littlecake Posted 19 Sep 2008 , 10:55pm
post #24 of 24

(((hugz)))))

i've been thru the fire more times that i can tell you, been down to getting change out of the couch for gas....and the ice storm 2 years ago just about took my biz under..

here is what pulled me out time after time.

pray and ask God for a good idea...(on making money)....the bible says in proverbs He'll give us "good ideas and witty inventions"

one good idea is worth a big bunch of money if you go thru with it....He's God, He's smart....He knows the way out of this for you.

i'll pray for you tonight, EXPECT a good idea to come your way!

this really works!

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