How Do You Raise Ur Cake Esteem?

Business By MamaBerry Updated 10 Aug 2008 , 5:26pm by littlecake

MamaBerry Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 4:47pm
post #1 of 27

Or any esteem for that matter?

I'm not talkin' about butt smoochin' but some wise advice.

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one with low (cake) esteem but I am also sad to know that I'm NOT the only with low esteem. Makes me sad.

Okay, so give your best advice and don't be shy! Everyone can look at this thread in the future whenever they're feeling low and get a boost.

26 replies
mkolmar Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:00pm
post #2 of 27

I don't think my cakes are that great but I just keep trying. The big boost for me is when someone sees a cake I'm not happy with and they just loved it. I'm learning to keep my mouth shut about mistakes and to just smile. (most people don't notice them anyways.)

Jasra Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:14pm
post #3 of 27

I get like this too, and I just keep trying new things. My husband always reminds me that no one else has seen how I thought the cake would turn out in my head, they just see the final product. So I keep my ideas to myself and keep trying to improve on the next one. Better to concentrate on what did turn out than what didn't!

CakesByLJ Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:22pm
post #4 of 27

My advice would be to challenge yourself! Every time you succeed you increase your self esteem. This applies to every level of ability, from beginner and beyond... icon_biggrin.gif

Cake_Bliss Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:24pm
post #5 of 27

I agree with the above posts..I just keep trying. I ahve balled over cakes I have done I have felt so bad..my husband is my biggest supporter he always tells me I do an amazing job and that I am talented (I usually laugh at him) but every starts somewhere no one is perfect and needs to practice and that is what I try to do; just keep practicing...your first rose will be your most memorable BUT your 50th might be your best. I say take it with stride and remember you will always have cake to eat and that always makes me happy!

staceyboots Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:34pm
post #6 of 27

I agree with the points made by Jasra and mkolmar....you just need to keep trying and trying and trying.

When I started cake decorating, I wanted to master all of the decorating techniques in one swoop. However, I ended up being a Jack (or in this case, Jill) of all trades but master of none.

You see, I would look at pictures here on CC and say to myself "Wow, that looks easy to make" until it was time for execution. My cakes looked awful.

Now, I focus my energy on mastering/testing cake recipes and how to fill and cover cakes with buttercream using Sugarshack's techniques. That way, I can celebrate lots of small victories along the way.

The same principles can be applied to self-esteem. I find that setting yourself small goals and then giving yourself ample time to achieve them works! Trust me, you'll feel so proud of yourself no matter how small the achievement!

mommicakes Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:43pm
post #7 of 27

for a quick pick me up, i visit walmart and have a laugh, and then look at my portfolio. icon_biggrin.gif

loriemoms Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:55pm
post #8 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaBerry

Or any esteem for that matter?

I'm not talkin' about butt smoochin' but some wise advice.

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one with low (cake) esteem but I am also sad to know that I'm NOT the only with low esteem. Makes me sad.

Okay, so give your best advice and don't be shy! Everyone can look at this thread in the future whenever they're feeling low and get a boost.




Today was a good example...I hated this cake. I didn't like the color, the piping, (it was hard at the site becuase it was dark to see the edges) and the buttercream wasn't very smooth. But as I was setting it up, people kept telling me Wow, what a pretty cake! So I guess I just saw more then they did. It helps to hear that...just gotta get my inner voice to do it too!
LL

Kitagrl Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 5:57pm
post #9 of 27

To look very closely at professionally made cakes!

Photos and distance make cakes look perfect. Upon close inspection, most cakes have just as many flaws as mine.

I just saw a cake on a website where the wedding was planned and photographed impeccably. The cake looked like a last minute job by a rushed caterer! Upon first glance, the floral work made it look lovely, but the actual piping was sloppy.

I saw a cake on the front cover of a bridal magazine. Looked perfect...upon close inspection, the piped border stripe and the piped dots on top were not perfectly even or perfectly straight. Again...the large flowers detracted from any imperfections.

I went to a small bridal show/cake competition. There were a few cakes that as they were brought in I was like OH MY WORD!!! But when I actually went over to inspect...I saw small mistakes with handpainting and other inconsistencies. The same stuff I hate my cakes for, because I'm sitting there staring at it for hours...but its the same stuff everyone has on their cakes. But we don't notice theirs unless we look. So nobody notices OUR mistakes either.

So anyway yeah that's what I do...I inspect the professionals for mistakes. haha. Usually the only ones you can't find mistakes are the show cakes that are fake that they worked on for months...or again, fake cakes for magazines or Wilton books that they took alot of time on. But most REAL cake that they did for a REAL wedding will show minor flaws.

indydebi Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 6:24pm
post #10 of 27

When non-cake people look at your cakes, all they see is a creation that they have no idea how to do ... so ANYTHING you do is incredibly awesome to them!

And I'm not telling them any different!! thumbs_up.gif

There are too many factors affecting a person's self-worth, so there are no easy answers. But I have learned over the years that if you SOUND like you know what you're talking about, people will believe you.

Which is why I have all of you guys snowed to high heaven! icon_lol.gif If you only knew ...... ! icon_rolleyes.gif

Staceface81 Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 6:27pm
post #11 of 27

When I want to UP my self esteem I just look at my first cakes.........that does it every time! LOL I can see my improvement. Practice makes perfect!

Kitagrl Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 6:33pm
post #12 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

When non-cake people look at your cakes, all they see is a creation that they have no idea how to do ... so ANYTHING you do is incredibly awesome to them!

And I'm not telling them any different!! thumbs_up.gif

There are too many factors affecting a person's self-worth, so there are no easy answers. But I have learned over the years that if you SOUND like you know what you're talking about, people will believe you.

Which is why I have all of you guys snowed to high heaven! icon_lol.gif If you only knew ...... ! icon_rolleyes.gif




Its true...whenever somebody used to ask me about if I could make a certain 3D cake, I used to be like, "Um I think so, give me a minute to look at it and I'll tell you for sure." Often they'd not call back. So now, I just say "Sure no problem, I can do that." And worry about "how" later. icon_biggrin.gif I find if I at least act confident, they are going to be more likely to use and enjoy my services than if I hem and haw and act like I'm unsure.

indydebi Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 6:38pm
post #13 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kitagrl

So now, I just say "Sure no problem, I can do that."




That's how my Polynesian Chicken and Hawaiian Pasta Salad got added to my menus! A couple asked if I could do Hawaiian themed foods and I said, "Sure!! No problem!" As soon as I hung up, I went straight to Yahoo Search and typed in "Hawaiian Recipes"! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

It's also how I got started on cookies as a business, thanks to hubby doing this, too. The woman in the office approached him and asked, since his wife was a caterer, does she do cookies and would she be interested in quoting the daily cookie order? He said, "Sure she would!" Then he calls me and says, "Honey? Do you do cookies?" icon_lol.gif

littlecake Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 8:14pm
post #14 of 27

you need to get some clear gold pixie dust....

that even makes my ugh cakes look good....i use it like it's crack..lol

Mike1394 Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 8:28pm
post #15 of 27

How to build self esteem? Wake up EVERY morning with the attitude your going to do the very best you can do, and kick the world right square in the butt.

Mike

mommy_of_3_DDs Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 8:44pm
post #16 of 27

buy a small walmart cake and take one bite... then gag and run as fast as I can to the kitchen to make a FANTASTIC cake that will turn my customers into cake snobs as well!

kansaslaura Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 8:56pm
post #17 of 27

A lot of the self esteem issues we're seeing are a direct product of what is being taught in schools-- No one is a looser, we're all A1 at whatever we do--Every thing those little fingers touch is museum worthy--

Stop the insanity!! *didn't some crazy lady go around screaming that a decade or so ago??*

We all can't be the best at everything!! Sooo.. when kids leave school with this artificially inflated image of themselves, they have no clue how to handle disappointment.

As far as the cake esteem issue--practice, practice, practice!!

staceyboots Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 9:31pm
post #18 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by kansaslaura

A lot of the self esteem issues we're seeing are a direct product of what is being taught in schools-- No one is a looser, we're all A1 at whatever we do--Every thing those little fingers touch is museum worthy--

Stop the insanity!! *didn't some crazy lady go around screaming that a decade or so ago??*

We all can't be the best at everything!! Sooo.. when kids leave school with this artificially inflated image of themselves, they have no clue how to handle disappointment.




I agree with you 100%! And what happened to the old-fashioned way of hard work! Some of those kids believe that they can get to the top fast!! If you want to be the best at something, that's great, but expect to put in long hours. I learned that the hard way for sure.

Remember, even though Einstein is considered a genius, he still didn't develop the E=mc2 formula overnight.

littlecake Posted 9 Aug 2008 , 10:31pm
post #19 of 27

kansaslaura, that avatar cracks me up and scares me a little all at the same time *so confused* lol

i think they don't call creative people "tortured artists" for nothin.....i don't think we're ever satisfied.....and if we did get satisfied we'd get stuck, and not grow and learn anymore.

on the other hand ...i swear by the pixi dust....ha ha ha...it puts a spell on the ug cake and makes it look better!....i wish i had some i could throw on me.

Kitagrl Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 2:49am
post #20 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by littlecake

you need to get some clear gold ....

that even makes my ugh cakes look good....i use it like it's crack..lol




I LOVE PIXIE DUST!!!!!!!!!!!

Some weekends its floating in the air, stuck in my hair, on the baby, everywhere. ha.

MamaBerry Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 3:40am
post #21 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by kansaslaura

A lot of the self esteem issues we're seeing are a direct product of what is being taught in schools-- No one is a looser, we're all A1 at whatever we do--Every thing those little fingers touch is museum worthy--

Stop the insanity!! *didn't some crazy lady go around screaming that a decade or so ago??*

We all can't be the best at everything!! Sooo.. when kids leave school with this artificially inflated image of themselves, they have no clue how to handle disappointment.

As far as the cake esteem issue--practice, practice, practice!!



Um, I didn't get to have that nice delusion. icon_razz.gif I was told by many, not including my parents, that I wasn't good at anything. A young person can only hold off the negative for so long until it is the only thing they hear. thumbsdown.gif

Right now, I find that my buddhist meditations have been helping me to take the focus off my self. When I do that I can think clearly and then re-examine how I see the outcome of the things I do. Everyday is tough but some days are easier than others.

It's funny. I've been told that many people, in real life, would ever guess that is what I'm struggling with day-to-day.

PiccoloChellie Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 3:43am
post #22 of 27

I just look at the first cake I ever attempted to decorate.
Yes, attempted. See below.

If that didn't turn me off decorating forever, then nothing will. And, let's face it, nothing I do can be as bad as that poor pumpkin. icon_biggrin.gif
LL

indydebi Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 3:48am
post #23 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by PiccoloChellie

I just look at the first cake I ever attempted to decorate.




icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif That is the most pathetic little pumpkin I have ever seen!! I am SO happy you kept on going! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

MamaBerry Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 3:53am
post #24 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Quote:
Originally Posted by PiccoloChellie

I just look at the first cake I ever attempted to decorate.



icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif That is the most pathetic little pumpkin I have ever seen!! I am SO happy you kept on going! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif


Okay, I've gotta tell you ladies that pathetic cute pumpkin picture is just too funny. I'm feelign a lot better. Thank you for that. It took a lot fo guts to shoe that pic.

Bless you.

PiccoloChellie Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 4:09am
post #25 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif That is the most pathetic little pumpkin I have ever seen!! I am SO happy you kept on going! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif




It's not little! I saw this "super awesome" idea in some cheesy magazine where you assemble a pumpkin cake using two Bundt cakes, flat ends together.

Now, a little backstory - at that time I'd only made frosting once before, when I was about 10, when I made a cake for my Mom to celebrate her receiving a college degree. Of course I wanted to do everything myself, so my Grandma gave me her weathered old Betty Crocker cookbook and a box of cake mix and turned me loose in the kitchen. I baked the cake and mixed up the (American buttercream) frosting, only I didn't know there was a difference between confectioners sugar and regular sugar. So I used regular sugar. Mom ate that cake up like it was the best thing ever, but to this day I'm haunted by the *crunch*crunch*crunch* from each bite.

So for the Great Pumpkin I went with another recipe, something I found on the internet, one I now know to be a seven minute icing. Not sure what went wrong; I probably didn't boil the syrup long enough or something. Who knows? But I was all excited to bake up those two huge Bundt cakes, glue them together with the orange seven minute icing, and slather the outside with a nice thick layer. I had grand visions in my head, and not seeing anything wrong I squirted on some of the greenish-grey icing (had no idea how to get black) for the face and merrily dotted candies all over the place to make it very festive.

Moments after I applied the candies, I snapped the above photo. And after my husband and stepdaughter finished laughing at me, we had to figure out how to get rid of this gigantic, ugly (but tasty!!) pumpkin lump!

The pumpkin disaster was less than two years ago; I had an excuse for frosting incidents when I was 10, but not so much at age 30! icon_lol.gif As long as I don't have crunchy frosting and as long as the face on a cake I make doesn't melt off these days, my cake esteem is pretty high. icon_wink.gif

icantcook Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 4:20pm
post #26 of 27

I was at a DOS one time watching Bronwen Weber. I don't remember the topic or how the discussion started, but she said, "Even the mistakes taste good." I printed it up and keep it in plain view in my decorating area. Doesn't help my technique or esteem, but reminds me to quit being too hard on myself.

littlecake Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 5:26pm
post #27 of 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kitagrl

Quote:
Originally Posted by littlecake

you need to get some clear gold ....

that even makes my ugh cakes look good....i use it like it's crack..lol



I LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!

Some weekends its floating in the air, stuck in my hair, on the baby, everywhere. ha.




by the end of fridays and saturdays...i'm filthy with "cake dirt"....ya know icing powdered sugar...colors....and covered with glitter, it's even in my car.

people say..."you have glitter on you..."

yeah, i'm gettin ready to go clubbin....

icon_confused.gif

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