Potty Training Boys

Lounge By michellenj Updated 11 Aug 2008 , 1:33pm by Dordee

michellenj Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 4:31pm
post #1 of 22

So what is the trick? My dd was using the potty like an old pro at the age of 2, yet me 3 1/2 year old son is constantly having accidents. I am SO FRUSTRATED! He was doing well, with no accidents for the longest time, and now the last 5 days in a row he has had accidents. Today's lovely mess was the worst-he took a big old dump in the bath tub. tapedshut.gif And he thought it was funny. icon_cry.gif

Any advice? Please help! I am desperate!

21 replies
sarahpierce Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 4:57pm
post #2 of 22

Boys are a lot harder to potty train, so hang in there! My oldest son was finally potty trained a month before his third birthday. He was obsessed with dinosaurs, so I bought him dino underware. I told him if he peed on the dinos they would be mad at him. And it worked. Every child has their own trick, the problem is finding what works. Your son may be old enough to start taking privlages away. For example : "You can't play with that toy because it's for big boys, and big boys don't pee in their pants." Good luck though. Let me know how it goes. Oh, and you may want to invest in a carpet cleaner if those things don't work! icon_biggrin.gif

mkerton Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 5:44pm
post #3 of 22

I was so lucky my son was totally potty trained in 2 days at age 2 1/2.........what I did was go to the farmers almanac online, they tell you the best astrological days to potty train (yes its weird but my relatives swear by the almanac for weaning cattle and such so I thought what the heck--ps I also did this to wean him off the bottle and both times everything went super smoothly)....... and then I totally got rid of all the diapers (I did warn him it was coming, I had a basket I kept the diapers in and when the basket was empty I told him I wasn't buying anymore...they just magicallly ran out the day the almanac told me to start potty training him!), for the first day he refused to wear the underwear and peed everywhere, the second day he wore the underwear and it just clicked.... he started using the bathroom and the accidents were pretty much over.....for the first few months I slipped a pull up OVER his underwear for naps and bedtime (just so I didnt have a huge mess to clean up if he did have an accident) I wanted him to feel the wet of the underwear because sometimes I dont think a pull up feels any different to them than the diaper. He rarely ever had a wet pull-up (and if it was dry I would re-use it so I didnt even use an entire pkg of pull ups during this training period)....... I did however take our potty seat with us anywhere we went for a couple of months.

I did have a toy up on a shelf and I told him when he was a big boy and using the potty he could have the toy, he really wanted that Mater truck so the second day he got it (after using the potty all day)

missyek Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 5:46pm
post #4 of 22

Having 2 boys and 1 girl, I have to say my daughter was the WORSE! icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif My oldest son was easy--at 2 he was doing pretty well and was doing everything on the potty but we still had him in pull-ups. A couple of months before my second son was due, he began to regress, so we did not push the issue because we figured he would do some regressing when we brought the baby home. How lucky were we that the exact day that we brought our second son home, the oldest was instantly potty trained and no longer wanted wear pull-ups. He was a big brother now! icon_biggrin.gifthumbs_up.gif Now, my second son was a big ol' pain in the butt! At 2 1/2 he was only going pee on the potty and still wearing pull-ups all the time. We tried many forms of bribery--stating at 50 cents, to $5 to a pick out whatever you want at the toy store, to going to Chuck E. Cheese's (his absolute favorite). We even had the staff at daycare tape 5 quarters to the wall for him if he decided to go at school (Yeah, my so REALLY loves money... icon_lol.gif ). Nothing would convince him to go! Finally when my daughter was six months and obviously not ready to go on the potty, my hubby sat her on the potty and called my middle son up to the bathroom. My hubby then states that his baby sister will be going to Chuck E. Cheese's before him becasue she is going poop on the potty. Oh boy was he ANGRY! He ran downstairs thoroughly upset. Ten minutes later, he disappeared and he called us up to the bathroom. He had gone poop and declared that he needed to go to Chuck E Cheese's. icon_lol.gif After that he was completely set. My daughter on the other hand did not want to do anything on the potty and was just over 3 when we really started cracking down with her. No form of bribery worked with her at all. We really tried everything and were just going crazy. What ended up working was so simple--a potty chart with stickers--basic smiley ones for pee and special pretty princess ones for poop--in three weeks she was completely potty trained.

So moral--each kid is different and sometimes the wierdest things make it "click" for them. But, yup, it is hard finding that one thing! Good luck!

mkerton Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 5:51pm
post #5 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by missyek

Having 2 boys and 1 girl, I have to say my daughter was the WORSE! icon_eek.gif




I have to agree with you there, my niece was HORRIBLE to potty train, so much harder than my son, she was still having the occasional accident until she started preschool at 3 yrs 2 months old, one accident in front of her friends was all it took........she was totally trained but my sister had tried EVERYTHING before that!

michellenj Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 7:17pm
post #6 of 22

Thanks for your responses. I'm going to try the chart thing next, then move on to punishement and bribery. icon_wink.gif He does seem to enjoy peeing off our deck. I draw the line at pooping outdoors, though!

missyek Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 7:40pm
post #7 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by michellenj

I draw the line at pooping outdoors, though!




What? The "nature poops" as my friend calls them since she has this problem with her son... icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif

Good luck, I know it gets frustrating, but eventually they realize that it is much more comfortable to be in underwear than bulky pull-ups or diapers. icon_biggrin.gif

michellenj Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 10:29pm
post #8 of 22

Argh. He just pooped in the sand box! I have had it!

He said "Don't touch my poop. It's my special baby."

JodieF Posted 4 Aug 2008 , 11:14pm
post #9 of 22

One thing I might suggest that no one else has is that he has to clean up his messes. When I was training my kids they had to clean up their accidents. Now, I know they couldn't clean things up perfectly, but they didn't like doing it. Once my daughter wet her bed (she was mad at me because I'd made her sit there to calm down). I had her pull off the sheets and she had to drag them to the washer and put them in. I helped her put in the soap and she had to put them in the dryer and help remake her bed. They had to dump poopy underwear and rinse it and put it in the washer and clean up their bottoms. I think it made a huge difference. All 3 only had accidents for a short time.

It also helped my boys to let them pee standing up (I kept a stool so they could reach).

Good luck!

athompson0525 Posted 5 Aug 2008 , 1:33am
post #10 of 22

I'm having trouble training my 3 year old son as well. I've tried the bribery, it doesn't work. He gets candy if he goes and is dry but he has a fit if he doesn't get it. I've put him in underwear now that i'm home 24/7 (first week as a SAHM). We set the kitchen timer for 45 minutes and that works sometimes...if it is on his schedule. I'm so tired of cleaning up messes & doing loads of laundry that are just little boy undies. I'm also up for any suggestions anyone has.

thanks

ziggytarheel Posted 5 Aug 2008 , 3:12am
post #11 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by JodieF

One thing I might suggest that no one else has is that he has to clean up his messes. When I was training my kids they had to clean up their accidents. Now, I know they couldn't clean things up perfectly, but they didn't like doing it. Once my daughter wet her bed (she was mad at me because I'd made her sit there to calm down). I had her pull off the sheets and she had to drag them to the washer and put them in. I helped her put in the soap and she had to put them in the dryer and help remake her bed. They had to dump poopy underwear and rinse it and put it in the washer and clean up their bottoms. I think it made a huge difference. All 3 only had accidents for a short time.

It also helped my boys to let them pee standing up (I kept a stool so they could reach).

Good luck!




I think this is a very good idea.

I had to deal with a son who was incredibly and unusually focused on things that interested him (still is, and he's almost 20). He would rather have an accident than to stop what he was doing to actually go to the bathroom. Eventually, like most children, all that stopped, but it took the threat of his friends finding out (not that I said I would tell them, but that they would realize what was going on) and the threat of not being able to go to preschool ("must be completely potty trained") if he had accidents to get him to stop. The thing is, they weren't really "accidents". They were pretty much "on purposes".

I think if I had done something that really inconvenienced him and was unpleasant, he would have mastered the potty training thing earlier.

Suzycakes Posted 5 Aug 2008 , 3:33am
post #12 of 22

My daughter potty trained at 20 months! One weekend and she was in her 'pretty panties'.

Now my son was a totally different story. I didn't even start with him until he was a few weeks past his 2nd birthday (now remember this was in the late 80's). But at the same time he had not totally given up his pacifier either. He didn't use it out of the house, but when he was home and especially bed time he wanted it. So I had started noticing that when he would do the worse with his potty training was when he wanted his pacie the most.

Well late that summer - he was over 2 1/2 -- we took a trip to a lake and took the kids fishing. Well they both caught their first crappies -- then my DS got bored with it and started getting interested in other things. All of the sudden he started screaming at the top of his lungs, crying, hopping up and down and screaming no, no, no . . . he was so loud that his grandfather was way across the lake and heard the commotion and came over to see what was wrong!! When we finally got him calmed down trying to see what was wrong -- we couldn't find anything, no bites, no blood, no nothing -- except for a dead minnow in the bottom of the boat and the minnow net laying nearby -- we finally figured out he was playing with the minnow bucket and one of them jumped out and went up and down his legs and scared the crap out of him. In all of the commotion -- he lost his pacie -- we couldn't find it anywhere -- so I told him the fishie must have gotten it -- and he looked at me with his huge brown eyes with the expression on his face of 'Well that fish can just have it!!'

Long story short -- he never asked for his pacie after that day and he never had another accident after that either!

Opinion in the end -- they will do it on the own time when they are ready -- or when they are forced to by something 'bigger' than mom!!LOL!!

Good luck - and sending patience your way!! But the help cleaning up might not be a bad idea!!

JodieF Posted 5 Aug 2008 , 5:23pm
post #13 of 22

I just wanted to add that when I made my kids clean up after themselves, it was a mean "LOOK WHAT YOU DID!" thing. I didn't get angry. I just said "well, you made the mess, you need to clean it up!". I didn't want them to feel bad about themselves for having an accident.
I just felt like it wouldn't be a big deal for them to mess themselves if they didn't have to clean it up!

Jodie

michellenj Posted 6 Aug 2008 , 1:12am
post #14 of 22

He does try to clean it up himself, and I have caught him throwing away his dirty undies, or throwing them in the washer. Nice little surprise. I think part of it might be that he is concentrating on other things and doesn't want to stop.

Karema Posted 6 Aug 2008 , 1:55am
post #15 of 22

This is too funny. My daughter was a breeze to train. I was pregnant and was trying to train her right before she turned 2. I went into the hospital and my mom watched her while I was gone. When I came home she was potty trained. My son is not that bad. If I put a pull up on him he has an accident but if I let him run around naked he goes potty. I put a potty seat upstairs and downstairs. So he has a choice of where to run. He was doing pretty good with only three accidents is three days so I was so proud of him. Then yesterday he pooped in the playroom upstairs where there is carpet! He stepped in it with his new sandels and poop was everywhere. On the carpet, toys, bathroom floor, bathtub, and clothes. My husband got the floor and I got the boy and the bathroom tub. It was a nightmare. I have been letting him run around with minimum clothes and it seems to work. I do understand that he just turned two so I dont feel to upset with him. Good luck.

Aliwis000 Posted 6 Aug 2008 , 5:07am
post #16 of 22

My mother just read the topic heading over my shoulder and started laughing.

She said that one of my brothers was hard because he never wanted to stop playing to go to the bathroom. He also had accidents for a long time at night because he is such a heavy sleeper that his body didnt get him up in time to go. But the pacifier thing made both of us laugh. The same brother had one till he was 5! Yes 5. It was taken away obviously earlier then that but he and the next child are only 2 years a part and he would always steal the baby's lol. At his 5th birthday we burned, yes set on fire the pacifier to signify the end of that era lol.

Good luck!!!

~Alicia

mkerton Posted 6 Aug 2008 , 6:06am
post #17 of 22

Thats funny about the pacifiers........my son is 3 and still takes his broken one (no nipple anymore--we pulled it off) to bed, he just holds it in his hand...I think its a security blanket type thing.... I figure at least he isnt sucking on it anymore!

itsmylife Posted 7 Aug 2008 , 7:27am
post #18 of 22

I was just looking up potty training ideas this past weekend because DS #2, who is also almost 3.5 yo still won't go on the potty consistently. This has been going on for months. First son... fairly easy... trained before he turned 3 within two days.

On Saturday I went and bought a Diego potty seat, since big brother's Spongebob potty seat seemed to be an issue. Of course, that hasn't solved the problem.

I'm bribing now with hot wheels. He's just so darn stubborn or 'strong-willed' as they call it now.

I was at the playground not too long ago with the kids, and some woman asked how old my younger son was, and she said 'oh' (with an immediately identifiable snotty tone) 'he's not potty trained yet?' - she had seen that he had a pull-up on. I just replied... oh... he'll get it when he's ready. Boy, I was so pissed. Actually hurt my feelings and made me think that there was something wrong with me or him.

Thank you for starting this post..... nice to know I'm not alone.

michellenj Posted 7 Aug 2008 , 12:56pm
post #19 of 22

I just hope that my little guy can use the potty the three hours on Tuesdays/Thursdays that he is going to be at preschool this year. Maybe the peer pressure there will help. Knowing him, he won't care.

lepaz Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 6:57pm
post #20 of 22
Quote:
Quote:

Argh. He just pooped in the sand box! I have had it!




I think you need a cat litter box scooper icon_lol.gif ! icon_lol.gif
Just kidding, I had to say that.

Anyways, it sounds like he is making it out to be a game, which is typical of boys. I can't tell you how many times I had to drain the tub to scoop out poopies and then throw the kids in the shower to wash them again.
Find out what his game is and make it work to your advantage.

Quote:
Quote:

He said "Don't touch my poop. It's my special baby."




Tell him, his babies special place is in the babies bed, which of course will be the toilet, keep some of his books in there so when he is "putting" the babies to "bed", he can read them some "bed" time stories.

My oldest son started potty training with his dad, they would go out to the back yard and have a pee'ing contest, which helped him figure out how to have control of the release part. Then we slowly moved it indoors. He only trained when he was ready, which is what I found with all my kids. One day they were just tired of being wet/dirty and stinky and that was all they wrote. But my boys were definitely easier that the girls.
Good luck and remember, years from now you'll be laughing about his potty training day (I busted a botton when you told us about the sandbox!). A friend of mines daughter did a doo in their backyard and put a stick in it and called her mom over to sing "happy birthday"! Well, instead of freaking out, she got out her camera and is now counting down the days until she can show it to her daughters husband!

michellenj Posted 10 Aug 2008 , 9:32pm
post #21 of 22

icon_lol.gif Lin!

Dordee Posted 11 Aug 2008 , 1:33pm
post #22 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by michellenj

He said "Don't touch my poop. It's my special baby."




I'm sorry but I actually laughed out loud on this one.

I tried potty training my little boy when he was 2 and it didn't go well at all! Then when he was 2 1/2 he just decided himself that he wanted to be potty trained and he did it. I didn't have to bribe him or anything. He did the same thing with his bottle. I tried to take it and he threw a fit and about 2 or 3 months later he just gave it up himself. I guess I was lucky.

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