Ruined Wedding?

Decorating By CakeMommyTX Updated 13 Sep 2008 , 1:14am by Shelle_75

CakeMommyTX Posted 10 Jul 2008 , 11:13pm
post #1 of 54

I'm just curious (and bored) how exactly does a problem with the cake "ruin the wedding".
I've read/heard so many horror stories of the bride complaining her wedding was ruined because the pink roses on her cake were a shade off, or the cake topper was placed a 1/4" to the left when it should have been in the middle.
Granted I have read about some true catatrosphes, cake fell over, completely wrong cake etc.
But how is it that the complaint always goes to "ruined wedding"?
The bride still got married did'nt she? Nobody was injured (falling cake is heavy), the groom did'nt run away screaming after seeing a slighty leaning cake?
Are these brides just being dramatic, or was the most important day of there lives really ruined by cake?

53 replies
Doug Posted 10 Jul 2008 , 11:55pm
post #2 of 54

for the OCD / bridezillas -- why yes, if it ain't absotootly perfect -- omg!!!!! it ruined EVERYTHING (dramatic wail, toss of hair, sniffle)

these are the ones for whom it is an all consuming lifelong dream/show/fantasy starring them.

of course so many starlets (spears, et. al.) have set the model so to speak, throwing all their little glam hissy fit and well, "i'm a star/princess too!" (stamp feet, pout, fling hair, sniffle)

they seriously need to
get a life
be brought back to messy reality

MnSnow Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 12:58am
post #3 of 54

omg Doug...ROFLMAO!!!

You hit it right on the head...but forgot the throwing objects! LOL!!!

If that's all it took to ruin a marriage or wedding, no one would be married.

Drama Queens...*sigh*

grealock Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:13am
post #4 of 54

My cake was delivered and the icing was ruined. I was suppose to have a lot of fresh flowers on, so my mom and the cake lady saved the day. My grandfather reminded me right before I went down the aisle (he walked me) that he had brought his cake 49 years before from downtown Memphis to the country wedding with my grandmother. The cake arrived intact but smooshed on one side. The back seat of his car was slanted. He said it was like rain on your wedding day, a ruined cake is a sign of a long, happy marriage. I have been for 11 years this month.

Juds2323 Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:24am
post #5 of 54

I think it's soo funny on another thread there were many reminiscing about their wedding cakes - many had to go back and look at the pics - I did (10 years ago) to even recall it. Yet it can "ruin" a wedding....*sigh** Puh...Lease.


maisyone2 Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:26am
post #6 of 54

LOL Love the way you put that Doug

I can say that a cake should not make or break a wedding. As all have said, no one would get married if it were so. However....I will say that in many bride's eyes, the cake is very important. I was at a wedding almost a year ago, I am an acquaintance of the bride's. She originally wanted me to do the cake for her, we even picked out the style and flavors. Well.....I'm not quite sure if it was a family member or a friend of the family who did cakes and this bride felt a little pressure to let this other person do it...for free. Her confidence level was not very high, but she was willing to do this. When it came down to it, the cake was the most horrific looking and disgusting tasting thing that has ever been created. The bride was upset, not to mention embarrassed by this grotesque blob. I don't ever like to bash another person's work, even a novice because there is always something about it that is good for their skill level, but a five year old would have done a better job. The bride didn't go around crying, she didn't throw a hissy fit....she held her head high trying her best to disguise her embarrassment. The first time I talked to her after the wedding, she knew she should have followed her gut and had me do it.

No....she didn't let it ruin her whole evening, but she will forever remember how horrid her cake was and how it could have been if she hadn't listened to family or friends.


indydebi Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:41am
post #7 of 54
Originally Posted by Juds2323

I think it's soo funny on another thread there were many reminiscing about their wedding cakes - many had to go back and look at the pics - I did (10 years ago) to even recall it. Yet it can "ruin" a wedding....*sigh** Puh...Lease.


That SO puts it in perspective, doesn't it? thumbs_up.gif

Kitagrl Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:41am
post #8 of 54

I totally agree!

On the other hand, I have to cakes aren't cheap and when I spend $700 or more on something I really kind of want it the way I want it. Ya know?

Obviously I shouldn't let it "ruin my wedding" but if I order a white wedding dress with pearls and I get a green one with sequins, I'm not going to just say "Oh, that's okay..." icon_confused.gif

CakeMommyTX Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 1:56am
post #9 of 54

I understand being upset or even down right pi$$ed off but to claim it actually "ruined your wedding" is a bit extreme to me.

It would be like saying your entire 10 day trip to Disney Land was ruined because 1 ride was closed and you want all your money back.
Even though you still got to ride all the other rides, have breakfast with Mickey and Minnie, visit Cinderellas castle and get your picture taken with Goofy.

qubanqtee Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 2:00am
post #10 of 54

When I got married 9 years ago, a family member (and my husbands got a hug family) offered to bake our wedding cake....I told him anything but carrot cake. So we show up at the reception, the cake is beautiful and we cut into it and Yup, it's carrot. Gross for me, but hey it's cake....guests ate it. Nice gesture, poor listening skills. Did it ruin the day? Nope, not at all, just more stories to tell for later.

indydebi Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 2:14am
post #11 of 54
Originally Posted by yourstrulytx

.... and get your picture taken with Goofy.

Uh.... would that be the equivalent of the groom? icon_biggrin.gif

Doug Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 2:17am
post #12 of 54
Originally Posted by indydebi

Originally Posted by yourstrulytx

.... and get your picture taken with Goofy.

Uh.... would that be the equivalent of the groom? icon_biggrin.gif


i resemble that remark! (the goofy part!)

7yyrt Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 3:22am
post #13 of 54

All sorts of things happened on my wedding day.

Groom late... rain... best man showed up wearing brown (my colors were blue and yellow) and looked like death-warmed-over going down the aisle... muddy dog jumping on the maid of honor's dress... I mucked up my vows... brakes went out in the 'get-away' car (!)... smooshed cake... LOL

Had a wonderful day, married a wonderful man. It's been 30-something years now.

It's the things that go wrong that you remember; that, for us, made our day different than everyone else's.

indydebi Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 3:44am
post #14 of 54
Originally Posted by Doug


i resemble that remark! (the goofy part!)

When we were dating, hubby bought me a stuffed Goofy and said, "So you'll think of me when I'm not here!" I still have it!

marmalade1687 Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 4:39pm
post #15 of 54

When my husband and I got married 15 years ago, we were one of the first of our bunch to get 3 different flavours of cake (each tier was a different flavour) - something that no one was used to yet. We ordered lots of cake...but when the cake was served, the older folks who were at the beginning of the line thought that they could take three pieces of cake (one of each flavour)! The cake was GONE in two minutes, and I never got my cake!! icon_cry.gif To make a long story short, we have many fun stories to share about our wedding day! icon_lol.gif

P.S. I share this story at wedding consultations when couples ask about how many servings they should order!! icon_rolleyes.gif

Texas_Rose Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 5:10pm
post #16 of 54

Well, it just proves what all of us already know...

Cake is the center of life!!!

CakeMommyTX Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 5:43pm
post #17 of 54
Originally Posted by Texas_Rose

Cake is the center of life!!!

So true.

All that other stuff like love, family, happiness, health and friends is all just poo.

The Beatles had it all wrong... all you need is CAKE!!!

LeanneW Posted 11 Jul 2008 , 9:26pm
post #18 of 54

I guess when you are completely self centered and selfish a less than perfect cake can ruin your wedding.

"Get over yourself!" that's what I would say to the sniffling, hair tossing, foot stomping briide.

Not a wedding story but still about cake and still funny...

My mom hosted a friend's grandson's bday at her house (they have a big yard and a pool). My mom was carrying the cake to the yard, candles burning, singing, then she trips. the cake goes flying.

It was hilarious! The 9 year old yells "you ruined my birthday"

I gave him a fork and then proceeded to eat the cake where it sat on the deck.

In my opinion my mom made that boring party a riot and definately a day to remember.

Lil_Belle Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 2:26am
post #19 of 54

"It would be like saying your entire 10 day trip to Disney Land was ruined because 1 ride was closed and you want all your money back."

had to laugh at that, I've had that happen before (I work at Disneyland) but I think on their actual wedding day people's emotions are just so on edge that they freak out and then later when they get their senses back, they realize it's fine and never really mattered.

indydebi Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 2:46am
post #20 of 54
Originally Posted by Lil_Belle

had to laugh at that, I've had that happen before (I work at Disneyland)

nuh-uh!!! icon_surprised.gif Are you telling me for real that people are SO self absorbed that they really ask for a full refund because a ride was shut down?

I thought I'd heard it all!! icon_eek.gif

cerobs Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 2:55am
post #21 of 54

We'll just read my post Please help me about the mother of the bride.

pinklesley1 Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 2:55am
post #22 of 54

my engagement cake (which i didnt make myself) completely collapsed on the back...

and after the dinner of the day of my wedding, it poured.... ( everything was soaked ) but it got everyonw under the roof of the porch - my wedding was outside in my parents backyard - and dancng

so i would agree with grandpa that a messed up cake is luck, bc i planned my wedding myself and even made my cake, and it was an awesome expirience... and then the rain on my wedding day was a blessing bc it got people dancing and we have had an awesome year so far!!!

Melvira Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 3:04am
post #23 of 54

I think the people that say something like that 'ruined their wedding' have no idea what actual suffering is like. Like has been mentioned, it's that self-absorbed, "charmed life" mentality.

3 days before my wedding I was sitting on my couch working on *something*, talking to my mom on the phone as she was working on my wedding cake (I didn't do cakes back then) and had to tell her to hold on a second so I could turn up the volume on the TV and see what the weird news flash was all about. It looked like a building on fire or something. I turned it up and watched in 'real time' as the second plane hit the second of the twin towers. Talk about ruining a wedding! Guests couldn't come because of all the planes being grounded. The minister had to DRIVE 15 hours just to get here to marry us. We lost our reception site because it was a military institution, had to have a half @ssed, last minute reception in the church basement. But you know what??? That was the most beautiful wedding I've ever been to! It wasn't ruined... because the people I loved had not been killed. Even the ones that couldn't be there with us... at least they were alive. And amidst this horror that had hit us, we were proof that life goes on, and that good *normal* things were still happening. It was an affirmation of life. I'm telling you, if that can't ruin a wedding, a crappy cake can't do it either!! icon_biggrin.gif

nicolepa Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 3:05am
post #24 of 54

One of my (2) bridesmaids was trying to ruin my wedding. (She wanted my husband for herself, no joke. BTW she was married.) Anyway, she "forgot" to pick up her dress from the alterations place.

I ended up picking up new dresses, literally, an hour before I had to be at the church.

I would never say my wedding was "ruined". We've been married 11 years.

BCJean Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 3:05am
post #25 of 54

I think the reason they may get the idea, it ruined their wedding, may be because serving the cake is the last big part of their wedding day. It is the grand finale.

If you went to a fireworks show and it was beautiful for 30 minutes and that last huge blast of fireworks at the end fizzled and there was nothing to scream and cheer for....I think you would go home feeling the whole evening had let you down.

If everything went wrong through the whole wedding...and then the cake was would want to say, the cake ruined your wedding.... when the cake could have salvaged everything else, if it had been perfect.

lane52403 Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 3:07am
post #26 of 54

My wedding cake was gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous. But we did have some little problems. The MOH left my shoes at her house about an hour away...we didn't realize it until I went to put them on before we left the house. She ran, in her dress, to a shoe store and grabbed me a new pair. Needless to say, they were too big and a lower heel than I had my gown fitted with. Tripping on my dress all day, and to boot, it was completely filthy by the end of the day because it was dragging on the floor. Then, the limo was late picking us up, so as we left the house to pile into MOH's Jetta (5 girls, one in a wedding dress, 4 in bridesmaids dresses) the driver pulls up. One of them tripped into me and I almost fell in the mud....Of course it was raining. But the limo driver caught me just in time. But all the time, I didn't care about anything. Up until that morning, I was going crazy about every little detail. But, that morning, I was strangely calm, not nervous at all. And so excited to be getting married. So when we showed up at the reception hall and they had moved our party into a smaller, not quite big enough, room, I was just happy that they gave my parents a 25% discount on the food. I think normal, rational people who are getting married because they are in love, don't sweat the small things. It wasn't about putting on a show for me. Brides who are so crazy about everything are just asking for a disaster I think.

CakeMommyTX Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 3:32am
post #27 of 54

Well it seems that after its all said and done and the couples see how much they actually spent, they think huh well I can't return the dress, or the ring, or the church so why don't I complain about the cake and get my money back!

I understand buyerâs remorse, I get it all the time, I am the worst impulse shopper.
If you don't have the money to spend on a 1000+$ cake, then don't spend it.
But instead the spend it, and then they complain it "ruined" their wedding so they want their money back, all though the served it to all there guests.

And I know this is not every bride, but we have all heard or experienced this before.
I just wish they would be up front and say "I spent too much money can I have some back?â so we as decorators didnât have to doubt ourselves or our skills and jump through hoops to please them and save our reputations.

Melvira Posted 13 Jul 2008 , 1:28pm
post #28 of 54
Originally Posted by lane52403

...that morning, I was strangely calm, not nervous at all. And so excited to be getting married...

Same here! Everyone kept asking me if I was nervous and I was like, "No... because I'm not making the biggest mistake of my life!" We had been together long enough, and been through enough, that I knew this was the 'right' move, and there wasn't a reason to be nervous!!

Originally Posted by lane52403

...I think normal, rational people who are getting married because they are in love, don't sweat the small things.

Exactly!!! I couldn't have said it better if I had a team of Hallmark writers in my pocket!! thumbs_up.gif

SugaredUp Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 12:46am
post #29 of 54

To the OP, I really don't understand how anyone can claim a cake can ruin their wedding, either. I think some women are so obsessed with the "wedding" that they forget the part about the "marriage". You're doing this because you are in love (supposedly) and it should be the happiest day of your life, or one of them. For me, on my wedding day, nothing could have ruined it as long as I was healthy, my family was healthy, and I was marrying my soul mate.

SweetResults Posted 1 Sep 2008 , 3:02am
post #30 of 54

My cake was terrible, all I wanted was flowers (which I provided to the baker) in between each tier. She must have taken ALL the flowers HOME because there were almost NONE on the cake and you could see the center supports and plates. Didn't ruin my day, but it pops into my head all the time. I wish I had spoken up and said something that day or when I got back from my honeymoon, at least then I would have had closure. I should have complained, but I was really trying to convince myself it was no big deal. I didn't need a refund or anything, but I just wish I had said SOMETHING. Oh well. 12 years later and I am still trying to forget about it. Again, really not a big deal, just something I wish I could forget about.

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