Did Anyone Else Ball Like A Baby?

Lounge By titch Updated 10 Jul 2008 , 3:11am by imagine76

titch Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 12:30pm
post #1 of 15

My dd is due to start school in Sept, today we went for just half and hour of her meeting her teacher again and playing with the other kids, when it came to drop her off she was really clinging to me and started to cry, which of course nearly set me off, we went into the play ground for her to go play with all the other kids whilst her teacher took her off me and I went back into the class room, I had to stop myself from crying, I spoke with the class room assistant and again couldnt help myself! I felt such a twat, and very embarrassed. Ã'm soo not looking forward till Sept as I know I'll be a right mess! icon_cry.gificon_redface.gif

Rach

14 replies
Meemawfish Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 1:08pm
post #2 of 15

Don't be embarrased. This happens to all moms I think. It does get a little easier the more kids you have though. It's alright to cry just wait untill the kids can't see. icon_lol.gif

indydebi Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 1:38pm
post #3 of 15

Maybe because I was the oldest of six kids and I was around kids all the time, but I've never cried because my "baby" was "growing up". I'm excited to see them enter a new phase of their life! They are excited about being a Big Kid and going to school and I'm excited with them! Enjoy each and every phase of your child's life .... don't look at it with feelings of dread and anguish of "times gone by and lost". Look at it as a new door opening with new experiences for you to share!

Parenting is too hard to start with, without turning it into moments of sadness and grief.

Enjoy the adventure!!!!!!!!! thumbs_up.gif

Just so y'all don't think I'm a big hard-a$$ all the time, yes, I cried at my daughter's wedding because it was a happy and joyful moment ... not because she was leaving (she had "left" 4 years ago when she joined the Army .... and no, I didn't cry then, either. She was off on a new adventure!). I cried AFTER i found out my Marine son was ok after receiving the Purple Heart when his LAV was blown up by a land mine.

foxymomma521 Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 1:59pm
post #4 of 15

I think I'm at the opposite end of the spectrum... I can't wait for school to start! My house is like a zoo icon_lol.gif
Anyway, I'm sure when my youngest starts Kindergarten I'll be sad too, but I try to look at it like Debi does because there's a lot to look forward to.
I was only 21 when we had our first, so a little part of me is looking forward to time where I don't have to be Mommy. icon_biggrin.gif Or at least only Mommy to 2 and not 3...
Hey, now you'll have more time for cakes! thumbs_up.gif

ziggytarheel Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 2:33pm
post #5 of 15

What worked for me was to always be excited for my children and their new adventures. I loved every age...but realized there were always benefits for the next age/stage in life. I had one extremely independent child from day one and the other was independent but surely liked mommy around. icon_smile.gif

One of the biggest surprises for me was when I took the second one for the first day of kindergarten. He had the same teacher his sister had 3 years before and was quite familiar with the school and its set up by that time. I drove up to the school and parked. He opened his door, said, "Bye Mommy!" and ran to his classroom! I sat there in amazement as he went in the door of his classroom. It was a hard to not get out of the car and follow him inside, but that was such a huge moment for him that I just had to not make it about mommy and follow him, but let him be a big boy. icon_smile.gif

I would suggest looking at all the good parts of this big change. I always planned fun things for me on the big transition days so I wouldn't be tempted to sit and mope. Too bad I didn't remember that on the day that one child started middle school and the started high school! That was much harder for me!

Sorry for rambling...I'm on high doses of medication at the moment. icon_smile.gif But I really think that if you can create an environment of excitement and celebration about these milestones and really encourage independence between now and then, you'll do great!

My kids have both served several years as overnight counselors at a camp. The kids who get homesick and stay homesick are the ones, typically, whose parents have unintentionally encouraged that. Sticking around too long at drop off time. Letters announcing how very much they miss their child. Letters offering to come get them a little early. Children often times then feel like they are not free to grow and enjoy themselves without their parents. When the kids know that you are comfortable with them separating from you and are celebrating that, they are free to celebrate it as well.

Once, we were at the closing ceremony for a week of camp. A mom and dad and their young camper daughter were walking in in front of us. The mom was detailing how much she had missed the little girl. How she couldn't sleep at night. How she would go into her room and cry. How she couldn't do anything without thinking about her. The little girl was quite puzzled and it was obvious she began to feel guilty. She stopped talking about the fun she had and clung to her mom the rest of the night.

That is an extreme story, but I think the extremes help to illustrate how we can help our kids grow up and enjoy it and we can too!

titch Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 9:33pm
post #6 of 15

Thanx guys, it's weird, my dd has been in daycare since she was 4 months old and yes I'm looking forward to her going to school I cant wait, I even have all her school uniform ready and waiting, LOL!

I guess what I'm really worried about is her getting bullied, I was bullied at school right up until I was 13, so I am petrified of it happing to my little girl. Today I wished that she had gone with her daycare class, so that I wasnt there, she is good when I"m not there, but starts to get clingy when I am there, even though all her friends are there aswell.

Rach

indydebi Posted 4 Jul 2008 , 11:31pm
post #7 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by titch

I guess what I'm really worried about is her getting bullied, I was bullied at school right up until I was 13, so I am petrified of it happing to my little girl.




You're like one of those adults who is afraid of water, therefore you "think" you need to protect your children from the water. So your children never learn to swim, which is NOT the way to protect them from the water. (I knew a woman who was like this. She couldn't swim, so she never wanted her children to learn how to swim. Made no sense to me on why she wanted to instill HER fear of water onto her children.)

Don't turn your child into a victim ..... odds are good that she's not going to school with the same kids you went to school with. And accept the fact NOW that kids get into little bickerings and name calling at school so decide NOW that you're not going to blow it out of proportion just because it happened to you when you were a kid. Stuff happens .... yes, protect your child if they are getting beat up; teach them to deal with life's little (repeat ... LITTLE) daily problems.

Dont' teach her that she needs to be afraid.

Being a parent doesn't come with an owner's manual, so we all enter it hit and miss! Dont' stress over the fact that you're pretty much being an overall normal mom! thumbs_up.gif

titch Posted 5 Jul 2008 , 6:12am
post #8 of 15

I guess when you put it like that, I can see from a different point of view and didnt realise what I was doing, I certainly dont want to my fear into her, I have already been told that when she's at daycare she is very already very bossy! I was very independant as a child and I was always away on trips with out my parents etc, to which I would love for my kids to get involved in aswell.

I'm already signing up my kids for swimming lessons, dance and gymnastics as I want them to experience it all.

Thanx Indy, it's always nice to be able to speak to another mom who has been there, done that and can tell you what to expect and how to react to it when the time comes. I'll let you all know how I get on come Sept, I"ll post a pic of her in a new school uniform.

Rach

kimmypooh79 Posted 5 Jul 2008 , 8:46pm
post #9 of 15

My DD is still another year away from pre-school and 2 years away from kindergarten but I already cry thinking about how fast that day is coming.

lepaz Posted 5 Jul 2008 , 9:43pm
post #10 of 15

My youngest started Kindergarten last year and at least once a week, as the little yellow bus was driving away, I would get teary eyed. I knew he was going to join his friends that he made and have a ball cutting and pasting. I think part of this, for me, was he is my last and I'm starting to feel useless as they grow up (I am now officially "uncool" since my oldest turned into one of them "teenagers") and become self-sufficient. To help MY transition to Kindgergarten I volunteered for a couple of hours a week in his class (maybe a little stalkerish?) which made him feel special and me feel better. Your little one will be just fine, because you were bullied doesn't mean your child will be, and if it ever does happen you will handle it like a protective Mama (the playground scene for the movie "The Hand that Rocks the Cradle" comes to mind icon_twisted.gif )
It's a trade-off because I LOVE to get those cute little gifts that they make at school while I'm waiting for the little bus to pull up.
PS: I bauled like a baby icon_cry.gif at their Kindergarten graduations! And proud of it!

tchrmom Posted 6 Jul 2008 , 12:31am
post #11 of 15

Many schools have counselors and volunteers in a special room with kleenex and coffee for the "kindergarten moms" on the first day of school. (I teach in the school where my child will go and I plan to be in the crying room-- unless the principal gives me a job somewhere to take my mind off it.) You are totally normal, and it sounds like you are doing a great job of letting your child do what she needs to-- you just have feelings about it.

Indydebi-- your comment about no owners manual-- very appropriate. Helps me forgive myself when I handle my son badly. He will be five next week, and he's allergic to peanuts. One time not long ago he said, "Mommy, it sure would have been better if they wrote that I was allergic to peanuts on my tag." He still (despite our conversations) seems to think we pick out babies at a baby store and that there are labels that are full of information.

Dordee Posted 7 Jul 2008 , 7:18pm
post #12 of 15

Cried like a baby!!!! Cried when he went to Preschool and cried again when he went into Kindergarten. But that's just me. I cry at commercials icon_redface.gif I'm very emotional. I'm hoping this year will be better icon_rolleyes.gif My eyes were so full of tears when I had to leave my son at Preschool that I couldn't hardly see the sidewalk.

You are completely normal. Some mom's take it in stride better than others. I wish I wasn't so emotional about everything but I am so I try to deal with it.

Good Luck!

titch Posted 7 Jul 2008 , 7:54pm
post #13 of 15

Yeah Im a real emotional person aswell, I have yet to watch an episode of army wives without crying. LOL!

kimmypooh79 Posted 7 Jul 2008 , 9:21pm
post #14 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dordee

Cried like a baby!!!! Cried when he went to Preschool and cried again when he went into Kindergarten. But that's just me. I cry at commercials icon_redface.gif I'm very emotional. I'm hoping this year will be better icon_rolleyes.gif My eyes were so full of tears when I had to leave my son at Preschool that I couldn't hardly see the sidewalk.

You are completely normal. Some mom's take it in stride better than others. I wish I wasn't so emotional about everything but I am so I try to deal with it.

Good Luck!




Me too Dordee!!! I cry when I'm happy, sad, angry, when other ppl cry. Ever since my daughter came along I can't seem to control it. Some ppl just think
I 'm too sensitive but I really can't control it in some cases....it's not like I want to cry.

imagine76 Posted 10 Jul 2008 , 3:11am
post #15 of 15

i bawl about everything. i bawled right through my daughter's ballet routine at her recital in may -i really felt like a dork for that one. i made sure she didn't see me bawling the day she started kindergarten. ok, or the day she started pre-school. she was nervous but she's just not the type to let it keep her from trying something new. i'm a teacher at another school and i'd often go home for lunch. of course i had to take the route that drove past her school when i knew she'd be out for recess. that's right, i stalked my own kid.

my son however, is a different type of guy. he'll start pre-school in august and i'm really keeping it positive and tell him all the great things he'll be doing. for that kid, one tiny note of negativity and he'll be a hot mess the whole first month. i'm letting him know that it's ok to feel nervous but it's a safe place and his teacher is a kind woman who wants him to learn and have lots of fun.

ya have to keep a smile on your face for this one. just go ahead and bawl when you're out of her sight!

you'll be fine and she'll be great, especially if she has your confidence and support! thumbs_up.gif

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