Is it really possible? I have a 3 1/2 month old baby girl and my husband works 2 jobs. The times he is off I stick him with the little one (which he doesn't mind) and I run to the bakery for the next couple day or nights. So when he actually is off work I don't get to really see him.
I really do enjoy doing cakes and the hubbie supportive. Plus if I can build up my cake business just a little bit (only need to make $500-$800/month) then he wouldn't need the second job.
Part of me feels guilty and I don't know why. I mean I get to spend plenty of time with my little one Sunday-Wednesday.
Have any of you went through this? Did you keep on truckin' or wait until they got older? Any words of wisdom?
Thanks for listening!
My husband also works two jobs so i can stay at home with my two boys (4 months and 18 months). I don't have a store front yet so I do all of my baking at home. Mostly when the kids are sleeping. When my husband is home I do throw a lot of responsibility his way. I feel guilty for not spending a lot of quality time with my husband, but he likes the extra money and seeing me doing something that I enjoy. Hope that helps. you're very lucky to have such a supportive husband.
being a mother is the hardest job you could have... believe me i know, i have a 4 yr old daughter and a 17 month old son. im only 21 yrs old and am lucky enough to be a stay at home mom. i think you should do whats best for you... and your situation. personally i would wait a little longer until i went full blown into the whole cake idea... just because your baby is so young and i just would want more time with my daughter/son before the months slip by me. i remember when my son was very little and now hes getting so much older every day that passes. just take it slow hun... good luck though and i wish you the best with any situation you choose.
My two are 7 yrs and 23 mths, the other day my oldest was hungry. She went to the fridge and said "mom we cant just eat butter and eggs." lol, I obviously forgot that my children need to eat when I went shopping for a cake this Sat. lol, Its hard having to juggle hubby, and kids, but they know that I love this so much, and I get them involved a bit, especially hubby and he works really long hours. It gives us a chance to sit together and talk and he loves to help out. Just hang in there and when your little one gets older she will love to help out!!!
Take it slow! Always put your family first (which I'm sure you do). Take on only as much as you know you can do, not as much as you think you can do. As your baby gets older you can take on more.
You can do it! Good luck!!!!
There is nothing wrong with him staying with the baby bit. I know you are missing him too! I started at this when my daughter was 6 months old.
Honestly, we are people too not just moms. We have a right to nurture ourselves and have our own interests outside of our children. Unfortunately, we are made to think we have to devote 100% of ourselves to being a mom and that is just plain unhealthy.
Just think of how empowering it will be to your daughter when she sees you run a successful business! It does not seem that you are neglecting her at all, just doing what we all do. Trying to find a way to balance it all. I commend you for also thinking of taking the burden off your hubby a bit. I am sure he appreciates your efforts!
I think this is something we all struggle with these things you are not wrong and definitely not alone! Just take a deep breath, look at the big picture and keep moving forward!
I think it's great that you have a supportive husband who recognizes that you have outside interests and are trying to set-up your own business. As moms we always feel guilty about everything and try to shoulder all the burden. Marriage is an equal partnership and it sounds to me like you have some equalization happening with yours. Look at it this way, you watch your child Mon-Wed and your husband is at work. Than your husband watches your child while you are at work (not to mention they get to spend some quality time together). It all seems fair.
My husband is very supportive. He was so intrigued by my son's Spiderman cupcakes (in my album) that he insisted on drawing the webbing with my edible marker. I was glad he took such an interest but that was also the part i wanted to do since it was the funnest. Oh well, c'est la vie.He's also my best critic.
Your kids will really appreciate your talent. I made a castle cake for my daughter's 3rd birthday and had to put it together after she went to bed. She was stunned when she woke up the next morning and her cake was on the table in full-display. Throughout the year she kept asking me if i was going to surprise her with a princess cake when she woke-up. I told her not until her 4th birthday, but I couldn't believe that she remembered it at such a young age.
I think mothers need a break from their kids, even babies, especially stay at home moms. I also think children need breaks from their mommies.
It gives moms those well needed breaks. And it lets the kids know that they can depend on someone else besides mom for their needs.
I think it is great that your husband is there to help and that he gets a chance to bond with her as well.
Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement! It's nice to hear that other people are in the same boat. I do love what I do (at times ). I also like the thought of my child/ren helping out one day when I have a bakery of my own.
Anywho, thanks for the comments I definitely feel better.
My kids are 6 and 10 and my husband works out of town. Just because they are older doesn't make it much easier. They are so eager to "help" but this usually takes 3 times more of my time to supervise. Someday the training will be good, but right now I have to practice a lot of patience. I try to work a lot while they are asleep. Anyway, waiting isn't necessarily going to make it easier.
My daughters are almost 4 and almost 2 and I stay at home during the day with them. I work 2 nights a week and Sunday morning directing music at our church. Then, I do cakes on the side. To me, my cakes are my relaxation. I do the church job to be closer to God, for extra money, to be with other adults, and have a mommy break. But, I do my cakes for me and only me (well, for other people, but you know what I mean). We don't need the money from the cakes. But, we need my sanity from the cakes. It gives me a chance to be creative, which I need. It's my outlet. So, don't feel guilty. My husband takes care of the girls if I am doing a cake when they are awake (I have a home based business). But, I am also not doing a ton of cakes right now. I am just taking them as they come.
I know your feelings of guilt. But, if you didn't do your cakes, you would feel guilty about that too...you would feel guilty that you are not making money, your not fostering your interests, your not....We all do it, don't we? Guilt is a part of being a mom and a woman. We need to get over it. Or at least learn to live with it. Enjoy your kids, but enjoy your life, too. You need to take care of mommy first because it really is true "if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy".