My Husband Makes Me Mad!

Lounge By Texas_Rose Updated 4 Jun 2008 , 12:36am by tammycake

Texas_Rose Posted 31 May 2008 , 10:46am
post #1 of 7

I just need to vent somewhere...ignore it if you'd like icon_lol.gif it's long

We moved unexpectedly last month. There was a situation with our upstairs neighbor that suddenly deteriorated and he threatened our kids and hurt our car. Rather than stay and wait for something else to happen, we moved. Because we had just signed another lease, we had to move into a different apartment on the same property. It's actually a floorplan that we had before, which I hated because none of our stuff fit well in it and it had a crappy kitchen. The one we just moved out of had 10 feet more of counter space, more cabinets, 2 storage closets and I had gotten them to put in new appliances and a new AC unit. This one has nothing to appeal to me in any way. My husband wanted it though, because it's larger (more bedroom space and a bigger bathroom, big deal). The first time we moved into this floorplan, he picked it without me ever seeing it, and I hated it, and now we had to move into it a second time.

So I haven't been unpacking. Unpacking will mean that I'm staying. As long as my stuff stays in bags and boxes and tubs, I feel like I'm closer to getting out of this apartment. I hung curtains and I unpacked the kids stuff and the basic kitchen stuff. And then I stopped. My husband's been yelling at me that I'm lazy because it's not unpacked. I haven't been able to interrupt him long enough to explain why I'm not unpacking. I've told him twice but he says it's an excuse. He says we can move out in a year when the lease is up. I'm just planning ahead by staying packed.

I'm just frustrated. I know I'm being childish about the kitchen but the one I have now is like a dark little shed. The ceiling is so low I can reach up and touch it (and I'm 5'3") There's no airflow in the kitchen and when I'm in there the sweat drips down my legs and makes the floor slippery. The ants are so bad that I put a dozen ant motels in and it didn't help at all. They even got into my can of gumtex and my tub of crisco. There are mice in the cupboard under the sink, I heard them the other night and then I looked and found the droppings. The microwave is ten million years old (actually it's sticker says 1983) and I have a good, new one but I have no counter to put it on.

My husband works overnight and lately he's taken to calling me and yelling ALL NIGHT about the apartment.

6 replies
mkolmar Posted 31 May 2008 , 2:28pm
post #2 of 7

Is there anyway for you to get out of your lease. The new apartment sounds horrid! If not start making a fuss to get rid of the mice and the ants. This is just nasty to expect people to live with rodents.
**Your a better person than I am, I'd be yelling right back at him**

michellenj Posted 31 May 2008 , 6:06pm
post #3 of 7

Isn't it the apartment's responsibility to make sure that it's not infested with insects and vermin? I'd call the leasing department every day and have them spray and put out traps until I was satisfied.

As far as DH goes, I'd tell him that if it's so important to him that everything gets unpacked, he can get off his patootie and do it himself. That would shut my dh up right away. And if that didn't work, I'd tell him I was taking it all to the dumpster.

ShortcakesSweets Posted 3 Jun 2008 , 12:27am
post #4 of 7

I'm sorry you're having to go through this and live that way. Complain to the landlord everyday until they get rid of the rodents. If that doesn't work call the health department until you get satisfaction.

dldbrou Posted 3 Jun 2008 , 1:28am
post #5 of 7

I hope you can get another place in the complex. I have two questions. First, did you file a report with the police about the threat to your children and the attack on your car? Second, did you talk to the manager about moving the neighbor since he was threatening your family? If you spoke to him and he did nothing to the neighbor, then he is also responsible for any injuries to you or your family and property. If he refused to do anything about the neighbor, then I would require him to fix the apartment you are in or tell him you will break the lease because it is infested with rodents and a possible fire hazard. Then tell you husband that when he decides to consult you about where you will live, then you might consider to settle in, until then, stay packed.

Texas_Rose Posted 3 Jun 2008 , 3:35am
post #6 of 7
Quote:
Originally Posted by dldbrou

I hope you can get another place in the complex. I have two questions. First, did you file a report with the police about the threat to your children and the attack on your car? Second, did you talk to the manager about moving the neighbor since he was threatening your family? If you spoke to him and he did nothing to the neighbor, then he is also responsible for any injuries to you or your family and property. If he refused to do anything about the neighbor, then I would require him to fix the apartment you are in or tell him you will break the lease because it is infested with rodents and a possible fire hazard. Then tell you husband that when he decides to consult you about where you will live, then you might consider to settle in, until then, stay packed.




I did call the police about the neighbor, after he kicked Sophie's ride on toy into me and cussed all of us out...and the police told me that I needed to learn to get along with my neighbors. They went upstairs to talk to the neighbor, he screamed at them, then after they left he came and banged on our door and screamed, "I'll show you what happens to people who call the cops on me," and went out and scraped up the side of the car. I didn't call the police about the damage to the car, because they won't do anything unless you actually see the damage happening, so I would have had to lie and say I saw him do it, and I wasn't willing to.

I did talk to the landlord. The neighbor had already gone and complained that we were always leaving trash and toys at the bottom of the stairs (not true, I swept out there every day and we didn't leave toys because they'd get stolen) and that he had fallen over one of Sophie's toys and that he should get a lawyer and sue the complex. But he didn't fall over it, he walked right up and kicked it.

The really bad thing is, we had been great friends with those neighbors (not the man, but his family) for the whole time we lived there. A lot of being friends with them meant helping them out because they were so broke they never had enough food or toilet paper or clothes or shoes for the kids. Then my husband's identity got stolen, along with all of our money, and I couldn't afford to feed these people anymore. I suggested that she get food stamps, and she said she already got them, because she and the husband had a common-law marriage, so she didn't mention him at the food stamp office. Then she started going on about how they made $40,000 a year but it just didn't go as far as it used to. Well, that's about $15,000 a year more than we have, plus the food stamps...so why on earth were we supporting them? After that, I quit cooking for them and fixing her car and going to take gas to her once a week when she ran out. And her husband started getting more and more angry with us...he was hanging out with the druggies in the complex, so I'm assuming he had gone back to his old habits.

Anyhow, because he had lied to the landlord, the landlord didn't know who to believe. She let us move for no charge, and refunded the deposit on the old apartment. She also didn't charge us for a week of electric here before we got it switched over. So we saved about $500 on the move. Because of that, my husband won't let me complain about anything that's wrong with the apartment.

tammycake Posted 4 Jun 2008 , 12:36am
post #7 of 7

It sounds like you need to get really aggressive with the bugs and rodents in your apartment. That means NOT unpacking your kitchen stuff until the chemicals have their chance to work, the critters die, and you get a chance to use tons of lysol/bleach and really get everything clean.

If you get mice traps will HE pick up the dead mice in the mornings when he comes home from work? It may be a fun little project for him. We have always caught the most in the middle of the night.

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