My Son

Lounge By ShirleyW Updated 31 Oct 2007 , 3:49am by ShirleyW

ShirleyW Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 10:26pm
post #1 of 32

A week ago Thursday my oldest sister Evelyn passed away from cancer, she was 83 and I know lived a long life, but it still hurts when you lose someone you love. But nothing can compare to today.

I had a phone call from my former daughter inlaw in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania telling me that my first born son Randy was found dead in his apartment this morning. He had apparantly died on Thursday and they only found him this morning. I spoke to the coroners office and they have done an autopsy, it showed no signs of trauma but they think maybe it was a drug overdose. He had been terribly depressed this whole year after he and his wife separated. They have a 16 year old daughter together and her 19 year old daughter by another marriage. I plan to have Randy cremated and have my second son Scott who lives in West Virginia and Sara scatter his ashes in a place he loved, it is where three rivers meet. He loved the wilderness and I think this would be what he would want. I hope his tortured little soul will now find peace. I loved him very much and even though I know there was nothing I could have done to change things I just feel so devastatd that he died alone and lay there for days before anyone looked for him.

31 replies
heather2780 Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 10:29pm
post #2 of 32

Oh Shirley I am so sorry for you terriable loss, I cant imagine the pain you must feel. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

mkerton Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 10:30pm
post #3 of 32

Shirley..........I dont understand why you should have to go through such pain, but I will pray for you and your family......... losing a loved one is hard, but a child is unimaginable.

cakescraps Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 10:33pm
post #4 of 32

Your family will be in our thoughts and prayers.

LaSombra Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 10:35pm
post #5 of 32

oh wow, shirly I'm so sorry icon_sad.gif I'm sorry about your sister and also about your son. I just can't imagine losing a son...


itsmylife Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 11:07pm
post #6 of 32

So sorry to hear of the loss of your sister and the tragic loss of your son. Please accept my condolences during this terrible time. I will say a prayer for you, your granddaughters and your family.


wgoat5 Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 11:08pm
post #7 of 32

Shirley you are in our prayers !!! I am soo sorry for your loss



JodieF Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 11:21pm
post #8 of 32

Shirley....there isn't anything any of us can say that could possibly comfort you. Just please know that we're thinking of you and your family. You son is out of pain now, but yours is raw. I'm sure he wouldn't want you to dwell on the fact that he was alone, but I also know it'll be impossible for you stop.
Drugs and depression are cruel, cruel enemies.
Please accept my condolences over the loss of your sister also. It's never easy, no matter how old someone is.

I'm just so, so sorry! *hugs*


mkolmar Posted 29 Oct 2007 , 11:54pm
post #9 of 32

I could never imagine the pain of losing. I'm so sorry for you loss and I will be praying for you and your family.

cinderspritzer Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:05am
post #10 of 32

Shirley, I'm so very sorry for your losses. There's nothing anyone can say to take away your pay, only time will ease the pain. But there is a quote that I'll share. It's written by Mitch Albom in his book ''The Five People You Meet in Heaven''... "Time is not what you think. Dying? Not the end of everything. We think it is. But what happens on earth is only the beginning."

I wish the best for you and your, and we'll keep a candle lit for you, I hope your pain is eased soon. Your son knows you loved him.

Ursula40 Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:06am
post #11 of 32

Oh Shirley, my heart goes out to you. Nobody should have to go through so much pain. Will be thinking of you and your family and hope that together you will be able to be strong enough to weather everything.

Luby Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:25am
post #12 of 32

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Please know that you and your family will be in my prayers.

Ohara Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 1:05am
post #13 of 32

Shirley, I am so sorry for both of you losses. I pray for comfort for you in your time of grief.

jen1977 Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 1:50am
post #14 of 32

I am sorry sorry Shirley. I will pray for you and your family. I can't imagine losing a child. So sorry.

cakes21 Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 2:35am
post #15 of 32

I am so sorry to hear of your losses, hopefully you are surrounded by lots of love to get you through such a tough time.

ShirleyW Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 2:42am
post #16 of 32

Thank you to each of you for your kindness and comforting words. Today has been filled with phones calls to tell family and friends and to make arrangements. I have had my moments of breaking down, but because I had details to take care of I made it through the day. My two youngest children both have been here and I have sent them home now. I am exhausted and feel so sad I can't really describe it. I am going to make a cup of tea and then go to bed. I promised my daughter I would call her if I can't make it through the night and she will come and get me.

shivs Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 3:39am
post #17 of 32

Dear Shirley,
I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying that God will give you comfort & peace.
God Bless you


ShirleyW Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 4:13am
post #18 of 32

Thank you Shelly. I appreciate all of your words of comfort.

OzCookie Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 5:26am
post #19 of 32

My thoughts and prayers are with you, Shirley, in this difficult time.
May your beloved son finally find peace.

Shelle_75 Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 11:01am
post #20 of 32

God Bless you, Shirley, and God Bless your son. May he rest in peace. I am so sorry for your loss, a parent should never have to lay their own child to rest.

Jenteach Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:00pm
post #21 of 32

You and your family are in my prayers during this time.


ge978 Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:07pm
post #22 of 32

I'm very sorry about your son and your sister.

DebbyTCL Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 12:09pm
post #23 of 32


I am so very sorry for the heartache that you are going through!

May both your sister & your son be welcomed into the arms of Jesus Christ as they arrive Home and enter the Kingdom of Heaven where they will find eternal peace and rest in the mansion that Our Lord has prepared for them.

May you have God's grace & peace over you.

God Bless you & yours during this time of grief & temporary seperation,

DianeLM Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 1:06pm
post #24 of 32

Shirley, I am truly sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.

lardbutt Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 1:23pm
post #25 of 32

Shirley, I wish I could I could say something to make the pain and heartache go away, but I can't.

I am praying for you and your family. I pray you will be able to get some rest at night and remember the happy times in your son's life.

Be encouraged to know your friends here love you and are thinking of you often.

Hugs, MessyBaker

ShirleyW Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 4:36pm
post #26 of 32

Thank you all very much, you have touched me with your kind thoughts and support.

Memie Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 6:55pm
post #27 of 32

Shirley, I am so very, very sorry for your loss. Please accept my sympathy for this time of grief for you and your family. May your memories make the days ahead just a little easier. You are in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you all.

ShirleyW Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 7:20pm
post #28 of 32

Thank you very much Memie, I appreciate your thoughts and kind words.

crazy4sugar Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 9:16pm
post #29 of 32

This breaks my heart.

I am so terribly sorry, my friend, for the pain you are going through.

Nothing we say can make things better, but it's important for you to know that you have friends here on CC who sincerely care and wish you didn't have to suffer such a grave loss.

You are in my heart and I'll say a prayer for you and your family.

ShirleyW Posted 30 Oct 2007 , 9:39pm
post #30 of 32

Thank you so much. I truly do appreciate each and every one of you and I am thankful for this forum. There are many kind and caring members here as well as on Sugar Buzz and I thank all of you. You feel like an extended part of my family.

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