I have a 3D dump truck cake due this coming Saturday. I also have a cake for a baby shower due the same day. Here's the problem:

My favorite uncle died from multiple myeloma last night. We thought he had another 2 months, so this was rather unexpected. The funeral is being planned for either Thursday or Friday.

The baby shower cake is for someone at work, and I'm sure the planner would just go to Servatii if I said I couldn't do it, and would bear me no ill will. I haven't been paid for that yet.

The dump truck lady is a friend of my DH, but has paid $100 in advance. I don't know what to do...if this funeral is Friday, the viewing will be Thursday pm, and all day Friday will be spent at funeral mass, burial, and wake.

Do I call and back out? Or hold my breath and cross my fingers? What would you do in this situation? My Uncle Larry was important to me, I can't miss his funeral and wake. I just don't know the etiquette involved here, this has never happened to me before.

karateka, I'm so sorry for you and your family. Here is a question: if you were a customer, what would you expect your baker to do? My suggestion is to give a heads-up to both customers now about your situation. Tell them that you do not know if you will be available to make their cake on Saturday, given the timing of the funeral. You can also assure them that you will update them as soon as you know what day the funeral is on. Then tell them that you would understand if they want to make other arrangements.

I think the important thing is to be professional but also spend time with your family and remember your uncle. If I were a customer, I would want to know that you might not be available instead of assuming that everything is going as planned and then being left in the lurch when Saturday comes around.

Karateka, is there other baker you can call on in your area to help you out? Maybe someone here at CC? I'm sure your customers will understand, but having someone to refer them to would help you feel better about cancelling.

I'm sorry about your uncle.

I agree with DNbunny!!! do what you as a customer would want and expect from a vender yourself!!!!
my heart goes out to you and your family!!! May God Bless you all in your time of need!!!

I'm sorry to hear about your uncle! I'm sure your customer would understand if you had to back out.

I think you could probably get the cake done if you really wanted to do it though. You could carve the truck thursday night and then friday night finish the cake. It would be a really late night but it's doable.
I always do cakes at night b/c of my kids so I'm used to the nighttime thing....

Good luck with everything!
Courtney

Well, I just got off the phone with Mom, and she says the visitation is Wed nite, and the funeral and wake is Thursday. So I guess I can make frosting and bake on Wednesday, freeze the cake until Thursday pm, then decorate Friday. It will be a long day, but that's life, I guess. I may even back out of the work one, they will be the most understanding.

Thanks for the prompt help, I was really feeling lost for a few there...

Thanks for the well wishes. I think we will be ok, but it's really hard on my kids, who really loved this guy. Watching their pain only makes it worse for me, you know? This is the first time they've had to deal with death, except for our dogs, which just isn't the same.

I'm sorry about your family. I would ditch the work cake. You will be under lots of stress and that will only add to it.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I agree with maybe finding someone who can help you. I have someone who helps me from time to time when I get in a pinch.

Wishing you the best.

I am really sorry for your loss.

Do you think you can get someone to make the cake instead of you? IMO, I have tried to do something creative after a person in my life passed away and it just wasn't working. You kind of feel unmotivated to do the things you are use to until a little while after everything happens.
I am sure your customer will understand and you should let her know as soon as possible.

Again, I am sorry for your loss.

Hey Karateka, just ran into this thread, and wanted to give you my condolences. It's never easy to lose someone that was important in your life. My thoughts and prayers are with you! Please don't be afraid to let people know that you are not available this weekend. You're going to need some emotional healing! Anyone who doesn't understand that is not worth your time. I mean, you are not a large commercial bakery that can just have another employee do the job. You are a single individual doing this from home. I am positive that these people know and understand that. Of course, to be honest, doing these cakes could be incredibly therapeutic. I know when I'm upset I just want to bake, etc. And sometimes the best way to deal with death is an affirmation of life (creating beautiful cake art counts!) Again, my thoughts go with you my dear, and good luck however you choose to handle it. {{{HUGS}}}

Thanks everyone! I appreciate the words of support. I spoke to the work cake person, and said it would be extremely simple because of what's happened, and she is ok with it. I still have to do the truck, mainly because I figure I'm off Friday and she will not find someone to do a 3D dump truck in a few days, not for $100. Plus, Melvira's right....it will be therapeutic. Something to keep my hands busy and my mind off this.

I need to find someone in Cincinnati who would be willing to partner with me for situations like this. If anybody out there is from the greater Cincinnati area and wants to discuss it, please let me know. I guess I should have thought of this earlier, I wouldn't have been on here begging for advice, right?

Thanks for the support everyone....we will get through it.

I am actually right down the road from you in Fairfield Twsp.

I'd be happy to partner in situations like this.

You can PM and we can talk more.

I hope everything goes well for you and your family. You'll be in my thoughts.

karateka, my sister died from the same cancer last March, plus she had double kidney failure, plus she was mentally retarded (she was 40 years old, but mentally only about 10-14). But she was my hero!

I was in a similar situation. Sister C was coordinating everything and while she's trying to work out whether to have the funeral on Friday or on Saturday, I said to her, "Ok, this is really tacky, but if you can arrange it for Friday, that would be great, because I have a wedding to cater on Saturday!"

I had my crew on stand-by just in case. But we were able to schedule it on Friday and all worked out well.

It's the situation we never think will happen....until it does.

Karateka,
My deepest sympathy to you and your family on your loss!!
May the good Lord give you strength to cope with this time in your life.
All the best for the days ahead.

Charmaine

Karateka,

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss- my thoughts are with you and your family.