Am I Just Being Cranky????? Please Someone Tell Me

Decorating By laneym Updated 1 Aug 2007 , 3:53pm by chigurl

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laneym Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 7:43pm
post #1 of 68

Why, WHY WHY..... when someone(an aquaintence or friend of a friend asks you to make a cake for them, their children or family member and you deliver it as they asked and it is EXACTLY what they wanted do they ask......

"DO I OWE YOU ANYTHING?"

Do they think that just because we can decorate cakes that we just go to the store and they give us the ingredients for FREE???? And the local gas station says.....Sure...put gas in to deliver that cake.....it's on the house!!!

I wonder if when they go to the Supermarket or the local bakery if they ask them that???

I usually only do cakes for family or close friends, but there is the occassional time that someone will give a friend my name and tell them to call me. I love to make cakes and decorate them to try new things, and have taken them to different places, just because I didn't think my family needed anymore cake! But I don't advertise on them...CALL ME....the CAKE is FREE.....

Just had to get that off my chest, today seems to be my pet peeve day...

Thanks for listening!!!

67 replies
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julzs71 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 7:54pm
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Oh yeah I think your being cranky! Come on. These people need cake on thier special day! How could you deny them that or have them go down to the grocery store and buy a cake. Are you being cranky? Yes
I mean when I go to a local contractor I say, "build me a house, Call me when it's done and I can move in," It's all free because he's a contractor and I'm sure his wife won't be mad because she realizes I really need one.
Maybe I'm cranky too! It just happened to me. But the person actually offered me 15 dollars to make a 1/2 sheet cake. Hello!This doesn't even cover the cost!!!!!!
I hope you said yes, You owe me $50. I say that, but actually I made the cake for supplies. My daughter screamed at me already and told me I had to stand up for myself and tell her to go to the grocery store. My daughter is only 12. She's one smart cookie.

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jeffer01 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 7:56pm
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Oh laneym, you are not crazy or ill!!! You have a very valid point that we all understand here!!! It's just the non-CCer's that don't get it!!!! icon_lol.gif
They do believe that we have storage buildings full of supplies and can whip up a cake in an hour's notice.... for FREE!!! It amazes me too! And I hate to be put on the spot that way, because you know they expect you to say "no, you don't owe me a penny". icon_mad.gif It is very frustrating.

But I have been practicing my speech, especially my pre-baking/decorating speech that outlines what is owed!!! icon_razz.gif Maybe I should ask that next time I fill my car up with gas....hahahahahaaaa

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CakeDiva73 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 7:57pm
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I feel your pain....but I am going to quote indideb, who says when you are asked by a friend to do a cake, the first words out of your mouth should be 'What is your budget' or 'How much were you looking to spend'?

It is MUCH easier said then done but I am going to take this to heart and make it my new mantra...it's one thing if you want to make the cake as a gift, if you would normally have brought a gift, etc. It is quite another for people to expect you to make them a cake for the halibut!! In defense of 'people', I think non-foodies have no grasp of what goes into making a cake....or cooking, for that matter. I once had a guy friend request lasagna for dinner....at 3 pm in the afternoon...... I was like "huh?????" are you crazy?? Do you have any idea how much goes into making lasagna?

He had no clue but because I liked him icon_redface.gif , I made it....and we ate it at 10 pm icon_biggrin.gif

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TooMuchCake Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 7:58pm
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I'm sorry that happened to you! {hug}

When someone I don't know calls for a cake, as soon as possible after I hear how many people the cake will need to serve, I give them the price.

Can you try telling your friends something like, "I need to go up a little on my cake prices" just in casual conversation, you know. haha Maybe if that gets lodged in their minds they'll mention to their friends that you charge for the cakes - no freebies!

Deanna

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JanH Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:00pm
post #6 of 68

Well, you could always say: No charge, but since you're an accountant I'd like my taxes done (for free). icon_eek.gif

Of course, you'd have to insert whatever service would be appropriate for their line of work.

Seems to be lack of communication......

If you don't feel comfortable telling customers you want $$$ for your cakes; usually you're not going to get any - money that is. icon_cry.gif EVERYONE loves FREE cake. party.gif

When they're discussing the type of cake, decorations, etc. it's the perfect time to mention "payment". icon_cool.gif

If you're shy, use email to confirm the cake details and give the price. thumbs_up.gif

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weirkd Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:05pm
post #7 of 68

I think its just people. They want everything handed to them on a silver platter. I just got through ranting on here about a customer that claimed that my cake wasnt good enough to serve her guests and that she was embassed to serve it. Then she had the nerve to tell me that the cake was hard and messy. Well how can it be both? She seemed like a little girl that thought the world owed her something and wanted an Ace of Cake for the price of a Tastycake.
Dont let it bother you. Im fluffing off this one myself. Chaulk it up to niave people that are just plain rude. Tell them the price and if they dont like it, they can kiss it!

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Starkie Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:11pm
post #8 of 68

It's funny, because some people really believe that you are baking out of the goodness of your heart, so of course it should be free!

Now there have been times when I was pretty sure someone was doing something for me, free of charge. But I would never assume that. I always ask, "How much do I owe you?" (assuming that I owe something) instead of "Do I owe you anything?" (assuming that I owe nothing).

Of course, I am really not one to talk. A friend asked me to make her daughter's birthday cake. She knows what my prices are ~ they are listed on my website. But she asked me today what she should make the check out for. Instead of saying $40, I just said, "Whatever you feel is fine." SOMEBODY SLAP ME!!!!

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CakeDiva73 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:20pm
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It is so much easier said then done.....I have some friends who are forever doing things for me so I will make their cakes or free, but I am offering. I have other friends who are self employed and charge me full price for their services so I am forced to do the same.

The cool things is when you have friends and you can do stuff for trade - I made a big b-day cake for a friend in trade for a massage icon_smile.gif

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pklundberg Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:21pm
post #10 of 68

Yeah...know the feeling.
I recently made a cake for the girl next door. It was a pair of flip flops and a beach ball cake. Since my 2 young children were invited to the pool party, each of them took her a present as well. When we discussed the cake, I told her I would only charge her for the ingredients to make it. Well......while we were at the party, the little girl kept telling everyone I made it for free. (I didn't want that kind of advertising.) Then the mother pipes in, "she owed us, since I mowed her front yard a few weeks ago."
Okay....so what about the "FREE" labor I gave you on the cake. Didn't that count for anything. It took me 6+ hours and it only took her 35 mins. Thanks for telling me ahead of time. I wouldn't have made the beach ball cake. It didn't even get cut anyway.
I was so ticked off. Maybe if she had told me before hand, I would have accepted that.
P.S. - We never asked her to mow our yard. She just did it, since she knew we were out of town and she was already mowing hers.

Thanks for letting me vent a little.

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Cake-Happy Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:23pm
post #11 of 68

Thanks guys! Excellent advise! I'm going to lock these two quotes away in my memory bank:

'What is your budget' or 'How much were you looking to spend'?

Well, you could always say: No charge, but since you're an accountant I'd like my taxes done (for free).

I love it! icon_lol.gif

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Chef_Stef Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:25pm
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I have two points. One is that I never take a cake order without telling them, up front, when they order, very clearly, so there's no confusion, ...that the cake is due paid in FULL no less than 2 weeks before the event or the oven doesn't get turned on. The only one I did differently was a shower cake for a bride who'd already paid for the wedding cake. That one I did (shakily, with no $ up front) and delivered. But, right when I walked in the door with the cake I said hi to the mom and walked right in and laid the invoice on the counter and said, "Here's your invoice. Should I put the cake over here?"

Second, I always say no to family...unless I'm just really bored and WANT to create something for them as a gift because I really love them.

Otherwise I say "Oh, gosh I'm sorry, I'd love to make a giant cake for a surprise birthday party for my MIL to feed 125 next week, but I have three weddings and a houseful of company that weekend already." True story there: I just got asked this very question for next weekend, on a WEEK's notice, no less. All I can say is icon_confused.gif HUH? I wouldn't even do that one (for free) if I WASn't busy...it'd be a $500 cake! And the BIL who asked me phrased it as "We wanted to give you first crack at the cake."

icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif *crazy laughter in background*

Besides, the fam all think I charge what they call "an arm and a leg" for weddings, so it's a nice way of saying I have *paying* customers that weekend.

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LizAnn Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:47pm
post #13 of 68

Years ago when our daughter was dating her new boyfriend, we were invited to his birthday party and I was asked to make the b-day cake. During the party, the mother of the guy said "one of the best things about "X" dating "Y" is a free birthday cake." I almost choked !!!! And chalked it up to experience. Some people ... and this one in particular ... are just users.

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Steph2325 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 8:55pm
post #14 of 68

I'm going to throw myself in the fire here with only good intentions for you. Since you are the one running this business, YOU have to be perfectly clear about money when someone calls you. This is the time you would also discuss how and when they'll pay, etc. YOU are the one that has to bring it up and if you don't, well...it might kinda seem like you'll do it for free since they're a friend of a friend and you didn't say anything about money. Plus, it might seem unprofessional to these people that you didn't mention price (and in their little pea-brains) thinking they will get a cake for free or super cheap and you show up with a full price (expensive in their minds) cake that you want payment for immediately (duh!) that they didn't expect to be paying for. In the end, even though they might be idiots, it might reflect poorly upon you and your business.

Hope my yapping benefits you in that you'll no longer have this problem! icon_biggrin.gif

Disclaimer: I don't have a cake business, but I did run another business for 4 years and had the same problem in the beginning (before I gave myself a good kick in the head!) icon_lol.gif

Happy Day,
Steph

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jeffer01 Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 9:03pm
post #15 of 68

Homecook, I love your line about wanting to give you the 1st crack at the cake!!! I hear that a lot for cakes and for massages....I am a part-time licensed massage therapist...and I am told that every week by someone wanting one or the other.

I am always thinking in my mind "don't do me any favors!" icon_lol.gif People don't want to pay for either one....they want them free!

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weirkd Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 9:11pm
post #16 of 68

OMG Starkie! Your just like me! A push over! I will say what I want to say in my head and something else will blurt out and then I want to hit myself after!
But no matter what it is cake, whatever, if someone does something for me I always ask them how much I owe them or try to give them something for it. If they refuse money, I will bake them something. My neighbor does things for me all the time and I will give them a dessert a day later. Its just GOOD manners. Thats the problem today. No one has them anymore.

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7yyrt Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 10:18pm
post #17 of 68

ahem

ImageImage





Well, you ASKED someone to slap you... heh, heh...

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laneym Posted 29 Jul 2007 , 11:53pm
post #18 of 68

It is soooo nice to hear that there are other people out there who have mouths that speak, before the brain is completely in gear!!! I can be thinking one thing...like...geezz...I really should get $50.00 for all the work that went into this cake and then say....ohhh...$25.00 is fine!! ARRRRGGGHH....There are times when the little time delay thing that they use on TV would be good....The foolish price that you blurt out could be replaced with what you were actually thinking in your head!!!

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navywifetrat Posted 30 Jul 2007 , 3:54pm
post #19 of 68

People have no clue what goes into these cakes! I also only bake for my family and close friends. My cakes don't look like half the ones on CC as I am still training myself. I had one mom tell me I should sell them and I told her I didn't think people would pay for them. She said if you sell them for half what the store sells them for then I don't think you would have a problem. icon_eek.gif The cake I did for my DD that she was looking at was a castle cake (not in my pictures yet). She said the stores charge $40. I told her there wasn't any way I could do it for $20 that I had more in supplies than that. Even if we don't have a business doesn't mean that we should be taken advantage of!

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goodcakefairy Posted 30 Jul 2007 , 3:55pm
post #20 of 68
Quote:
Originally Posted by JanH

Well, you could always say: No charge, but since you're an accountant I'd like my taxes done (for free). icon_eek.gif

D




I'm sure there's an accounting website out there where accountants are complaining because all of their friends/relatives expect their taxes to be done at the last minute and FREE! icon_biggrin.gif

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FrostinGal Posted 30 Jul 2007 , 6:50pm
post #21 of 68
Quote:
Originally Posted by navywifetrat

People have no clue what goes into these cakes! I also only bake for my family and close friends. My cakes don't look like half the ones on CC as I am still training myself. I had one mom tell me I should sell them and I told her I didn't think people would pay for them. She said if you sell them for half what the store sells them for then I don't think you would have a problem. icon_eek.gif The cake I did for my DD that she was looking at was a castle cake (not in my pictures yet). She said the stores charge $40. I told her there wasn't any way I could do it for $20 that I had more in supplies than that. Even if we don't have a business doesn't mean that we should be taken advantage of!




Now that cake decorating is back to being my hobby instead of my profession, I have to point out to my friends and family that I pay almost double what a bakery pays for ingredients, because I'm paying retail price, not wholesale, for ingredients, now. Not to mention that it takes me longer because I no longer have use of a huge oven where I can bake a whole wedding cake all at once, but have to do the same process several times in my smaller mixer and smaller oven. On the up side, my cakes taste better, and are decorated nicer than most, and they have more options for flavors and decor.
If they want cheap, go to Costco. I can't beat their price for a 1/2 sheet cake. Mine has to be four times more.
It's all in their priorities which one they'll want.

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leta Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 6:43am
post #22 of 68

You should decide today if you make free cakes and for whom. I loved the advice I've seen on CC previously: Make a bottom line and tell yourself "No cake leaves my kitchen for less than $20 (or whatever)."
A really nice acquaintance asked me the other day for a small cake (only to serve 8 people, and I told her the smallest cake I make is $20. She agreed. I tell people it's usually $1.00 per slice, then we can go from there. If it's someone I like a lot, I knock it down a little, but they know they are getting a discount. If I want to try a new flower or decorating technique, I tell them I'm not charging extra for the gumpaste or Chocolate Transfer or whatever and they know they are getting a deal.

The first time is the hardest! It's easy after that because you have the experience of getting paid at least part of what you're worth.

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cakekrayzie Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 7:04am
post #23 of 68

amen to this thread, i got screwed by my family twice and now never, never again i always let people know up front how much its going to be and if you are a first itme customer i get my money upfront before i even start your cake, well about 5 years ago i got screwed by my first family member a cousin, she lives out of town, about 90 minutes from where i live well her brother lives here and she ordered a cake from me i was just starting to gain some confidence after doing it for 2 years well i told her i would just charge her supplies since she was my cousin first mistake, she sent me a list of what she wanted but no money for supplies icon_mad.gif so i bought eveything out of my own pocket, i keept the reciets so the day of the party i could not go had to work so my cousin took the cakes to her well the total was 60 for two sheet cakes and two smash me cake that she requested each with its own deco pack that cost 10.00 a peice plus an edible image, he came back no money, so my uncle found out and he paid me, well i later found out that my cousin said it was a lot of money and she said i screwed her icon_evil.gif so i sent her the proof of what i had spent! my aunt screwed my the next time i charged her full price for the first time which was 90.00 for two huge cakes she never gave me the money in fact she stopped talking to me altogether and told my other aunt that she din't owe me anything because we were family and she was hurt that i had the nerve to charge her icon_evil.gif sorry so long just had to get that off my chest

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indydebi Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 2:50pm
post #24 of 68
Quote:
Originally Posted by homecook

Otherwise I say "Oh, gosh I'm sorry, I'd love to make a giant cake for a surprise birthday party for my MIL to feed 125 next week, but I have three weddings and a houseful of company that weekend already." True story there: I just got asked this very question for next weekend, on a WEEK's notice, no less. All I can say is icon_confused.gif HUH? I wouldn't even do that one (for free) if I WASn't busy...it'd be a $500 cake! And the BIL who asked me phrased it as "We wanted to give you first crack at the cake."




First crack: Oh PLEASE yes, do me a FAVOR to allow me to do your cake for free because I pay my rent and insurance with compliments! icon_confused.gif

Had a lady call for a birthday cake and she wanted it on 7/7/07. I told her I had 3 weddings that day (2 wedding cakes; 2 buffets) so that day was really booked. She said: "So can you fit this in?"

Sure lady. I can cook food for 300 and 2 wedding cakes and be 3 places at one time AND find time to make your lousy birthday cake because it only take 10 minutes!!!

Dumba$$.

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laneym Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:11pm
post #25 of 68

That kills me...."first crack at making the cake" I know that I would be doing back flips because I got to work several days making a cake and decorating it for NOTHING!!! Thanks for being so thoughtful!!!! icon_smile.gif

SOME PEOPLE!!

But Debi.....you can't be serious.....you mean the next time I go to make a car payment I can't just tell them...I really love your car, it runs great, looks good and I allow you to put the little sticker on the back telling everyone where I bought it...(Free advertising).....So...do I owe you anything???

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BCJean Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:33pm
post #26 of 68

goodcakefairy
I'm sure there's an accounting website out there where accountants are complaining because all of their friends/relatives expect their taxes to be done at the last minute and FREE! Very Happy
I agree, there are always people who don't realize what they are asking for when they want freebies from a professional. A mechanic comes over, you say..by the way my car is making this funny noise. To the doctor...my wrist has been giving me trouble, what do you think it is. Your hairdresser friend...could you trim my hair while you are here. I think it happens all the time in all professions.
I think indydebbi has the perfect solution to this problem....what is your budget.

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briansbaker Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:37pm
post #27 of 68

Same damn thing here!!!.. When family says.. If I buy you the ingredients will you make me a cake.. A full sheet cake.. I'm thinking.. Ok.. Now who's gonna pay for the gas to go all the way across town to get the box and the board.. Who is gonna pay for the box and the board.. Hmmm... Is this cake gonna be all white, just smooth no border no color.. If not whos paying for the colors, the parchment paper.. Oh yeah not to mention,taking my free time away from my family.. To make make for free????? Burns my a$$!!!!

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Franluvsfrosting Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:44pm
post #28 of 68

My husband is a custom woodworker (high end furniture, cabinetry, trim work, etc). He's awesome at what he does so every stinkin' person in our family wants him to "build me this little..." Like putting the word little in there is going to make it less work? And they always ask me like I'm going to be able to convince him?! They haven't figured out yet that I'm the one that says "show me the money!" lol

I think they're starting to get it though since I usually respond with "Well, you'll have to ask him if he even has time to consult with you about what you want and the project pricing. Whether he charges you time and materials or a project price is up to him but his hourly rate is $XX" (that depends on whether he'd even want to do work for them. The bigger the pain they are, the higher that number is!)

Now that I'm doing cake it'll be the same line, different person!

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spongemomsweatpants Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:50pm
post #29 of 68
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Quote:
Originally Posted by homecook

Otherwise I say "Oh, gosh I'm sorry, I'd love to make a giant cake for a surprise birthday party for my MIL to feed 125 next week, but I have three weddings and a houseful of company that weekend already." True story there: I just got asked this very question for next weekend, on a WEEK's notice, no less. All I can say is icon_confused.gif HUH? I wouldn't even do that one (for free) if I WASn't busy...it'd be a $500 cake! And the BIL who asked me phrased it as "We wanted to give you first crack at the cake."



First crack: Oh PLEASE yes, do me a FAVOR to allow me to do your cake for free because I pay my rent and insurance with compliments!




lol Debi..you crack me up, can I rent you for the weeknd to teach how to come up with these great come backs?

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indydebi Posted 31 Jul 2007 , 4:58pm
post #30 of 68

I live with a stand-up comic .... and I'm his head writer! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

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