I Don't Know What To Tell Her

Decorating By biberbob Updated 10 Apr 2007 , 1:36pm by flavacakes

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biberbob Posted 9 Apr 2007 , 10:45pm
post #1 of 44

I have a good friend that has offered to help me get my name out so to speak and has been really supportive of me. Today she called me and told me that she had a couple of people interested in me doing a cake for them , she gave me the details and and asked if i would do them. I said sure and to give them my number and e-mail. Then a bit later she called back and said that she wasn't going to give them my info because she wants me to pay her for "bringing me clients" then proceeded to ask me to teach her to do some decorating. So now I am confused and don't know what to tell her. Any advice please and thank you.

43 replies
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Sugarbunz Posted 9 Apr 2007 , 10:51pm
post #2 of 44

You don't need her to get the word out. In the three months I've been doing cakes I've already managed to overextend myself. Nobody had to put any word out for me. Mind you, they only purchase supplies and I do the cake, but they are also perfectly willing to pay; I just choose not to due to being a paranoid freak.

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Sugarbunz Posted 9 Apr 2007 , 10:54pm
post #3 of 44

Oh, I guess I could answer the question. I think you should politely decline her offer. I know you said she has been rather supportive, but this sounds kind of backhanded to me.

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KoryAK Posted 9 Apr 2007 , 10:57pm
post #4 of 44

Yeah, seriously? I can't imagine a friend asking me for that. Politely decline.

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Kitagrl Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:14am
post #5 of 44

"Good friend"?

I'd do my own advertising....

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jendalain Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:41am
post #6 of 44

WOW! Yeah, I would decline politely icon_smile.gif

Good luck!

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indydebi Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:49am
post #7 of 44

Tell her, "I'm sorry, but I'm not yet to the point where I can afford to hire a sales rep .... but I'll keep you in mind when I do get to that point!" icon_twisted.gif

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Kitagrl Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:52am
post #8 of 44

You could do what I have done in the past and say that for every referral that orders a cake, she will get $5 off her next cake order. Of course that means she has to order a cake from you herself for full price, and then take off whatever discounts she's earned through referrals. icon_twisted.gif

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Kate714 Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:55am
post #9 of 44

that's kind of crazy of your friend to ask. I agree with the previous posters...tell her you can't afford to hire someone to "get your name out"!!

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ellepal Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:55am
post #10 of 44

I like both kitagirl and indidebi's solutions. I think it is pretty tacky to offer that....you surely don't need her help. Word of mouth will spread quickly, believe me.

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berryblondeboys Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:55am
post #11 of 44
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kitagrl

You could do what I have done in the past and say that for every referral that orders a cake, she will get $5 off her next cake order. Of course that means she has to order a cake from you herself for full price, and then take off whatever discounts she's earned through referrals. icon_twisted.gif




I've thought about doing this exact thing. I have a mom friend who is really talking up my cakes. I think I'm going to give her a stack of my business cards and everyone who buys a cake from me with her referral will earn her $5 off. It's a win-win for both of us!

Melissa

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itsloops Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:56am
post #12 of 44

*&@!#$%!!! tapedshut.gif

I'm sure you can manage to get the word around without a "friend" like her.

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biberbob Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 1:56am
post #13 of 44

thanks everybody for the help.

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kimheflin Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 2:00am
post #14 of 44

Wow...that sounds pretty tacky to me...it's one thing for her to ask you to pay her for referring you (especially since this was mentioned AFTER the fact) and even worse for her then to add that she wants you to teach her some cake decorating! I don't even know if I could even politely decline...it would make me too irritated!

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indydebi Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 2:01am
post #15 of 44
Quote:
Originally Posted by berryblondeboys

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kitagrl

You could do what I have done in the past and say that for every referral that orders a cake, she will get $5 off her next cake order. Of course that means she has to order a cake from you herself for full price, and then take off whatever discounts she's earned through referrals. icon_twisted.gif



I've thought about doing this exact thing. I have a mom friend who is really talking up my cakes. I think I'm going to give her a stack of my business cards and everyone who buys a cake from me with her referral will earn her $5 off. It's a win-win for both of us!

Melissa




I give 5% referral credit. Alice refers Betty. Betty spends $300. Alice earns $15 credit - to be applied to any future purchase. The more Betty spends .... the more Alice earns! (had a bride earn a free wedding cake because she sent me 3 brides and the referral credit covered the entire cost of her cake!)

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gateaux Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 2:02am
post #16 of 44

Sorry you are in a bad spot! This is no way to be treated by a friend.

If you guys had talked about it before she went out, then it's a different story. IMHO, but this is just wrong .

Just politely say, no thank you. I cannot afford a "Cake Hunter's" fee.

You could also suggest that she go to a Wilton Class or other Cake Decorating Class.

Unless you are interested in charging her for classes with you. That might work for her. Make sure you get paid by the hour.

Good Luck.

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rlsaxe Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 2:48am
post #17 of 44

Good friend? Really?????

I like Indydebi's response. Classy and gets the point across without being offensive.

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Teekakes Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:00am
post #18 of 44
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Tell her, "I'm sorry, but I'm not yet to the point where I can afford to hire a sales rep .... but I'll keep you in mind when I do get to that point!" icon_twisted.gif




DITTO!!! icon_mad.gif

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nicksmom Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:00am
post #19 of 44

I can't believe the nerve of your "good friend" icon_eek.gif sorry you have to make this choice between a friend,good luck thumbs_up.gif

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Tomoore Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:03am
post #20 of 44

I wouldn't bother with trying to be polite. She hasn't earned it or any referral bonuses. I would also reconsider my definition of friend. You don't need folks like her. Your real friends will support you because they want to see you succeed, not for their personal gain. Incredible...

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mommakescakes Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:17am
post #21 of 44
Quote:
Quote:

Tomoore


I wouldn't bother with trying to be polite. She hasn't earned it or any referral bonuses. I would also reconsider my definition of friend. You don't need folks like her. Your real friends will support you because they want to see you succeed, not for their personal gain. Incredible...



tapedshut.gif bad words tapedshut.giftapedshut.gif I agree with Tomoore, icon_evil.gif I thought a true friend is like family; always there to help anytime and any way you may need it without expecting anything in return. Then later when you become established you could always repay the help and kindness by doing thier cakes at cost or for free.

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Melvira Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:30am
post #22 of 44

I am appalled FOR you by this person's act of *friendship*. You need to dump her quick, and DON'T look back! The NERVE of some people. "Oh, you need to pay me to tell people you do good work, and, by the way, teach me how to do it so I can take over your customers and try to run you out of business." I know most of the time it's just a good idea to shut your mouth and turn the other cheek, but I'm afraid if I were you, I wouldn't be able to. I, personally, would tell her exactly what I thought of her. I guess I'm just cranky that way! I'd be staying away from her at the very least, until she apologizes for being the worst friend in history!

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mjs4492 Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:34am
post #23 of 44

biberbob:
Don't you just hate it when "friends" hurt your feelings? Hope she really wasn't serious!

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indydebi Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 3:39am
post #24 of 44

Melvira, I just LUV the way you think! icon_twisted.gifthumbs_up.gif

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doescakestoo Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 4:08am
post #25 of 44

I had someome like that recently and it backfired on her. No one liked the way her cakes tasted. So they found me. Don't help her, make her work for her cakes. She needs to find out time consuming the are of cake decorating can be. Don't show her. Did she show you how to decorate cakes? I am a teacher but only will show people the basics not what I have learned from other teachers, I paid money to learn. Big money from some of the best in the area. I won't teach others what they taught me with out something back. Sorry this is so long.

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pearldust Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 4:14am
post #26 of 44

That's strange she did that!! I noticed you said she is your good friend...so I'm surprised she would ask you to pay her for bringing you clients!!

i'm sure you can do without those few orders icon_wink.gif

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superstar Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 4:15am
post #27 of 44

Who needs enemies with friends like that. It is very sad, but that lady is not a friend, she does not know the meaning of friendship.

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nsouza Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 4:17am
post #28 of 44

That is way rude icon_surprised.gif I cant say anything that wasnt said before, but man thats way rude icon_eek.gif

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Wendoger Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 4:19am
post #29 of 44

The opening line of your thread....
"....I have a good friend..."

She is not....if she is serious....geez, gimme a break....

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JamesSweetie Posted 10 Apr 2007 , 6:45am
post #30 of 44

I could think of a few choice words to tell her tapedshut.gif If this was my good friend, then I would be bluntly honest.

"Then why did you say you would give me their info and then change your mind? Yea, nevermind, I don't really think I need that type of "help"."


I would question your friendship with this person, because the fact that she basically held possible orders in front of you for "a fee" is really disgusting to me. If she doesn't want to be your cheerleader or market exec, she DOESN'T have to be. Most of my business is by word of mouth from lovely friends and family, and not ONE has asked for money for refering people they know! I'm really sorry that someone who is close to you would try to profit from someone so simple as just mentioning your name to someone who would need your services.

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